Essence

by A. L. Waddington

  “For that reason alone, you will be attending a school a little closer to home.” A man’s voice from behind us interrupted with a teasing tone.

  “Sure, Dad,” the younger one replied, still grinning.

  We walked over to a large fountain encircled by a beautiful garden of flowers. The four of us stopped long enough to fully absorb our surroundings. I could not believe the things I was seeing, the majority of which made no sense whatsoever. I was afraid to ask questions since these people obviously didn’t seem to believe anything was out of the norm.

  The older gentleman placed his hands on his hips and looked all around him. “So, Jocelyn. What do you think? Is this where you’d like to go?”

  “Are you serious?” I looked at him strangely. He couldn’t possibly be serious. Me? Attending a university? Patrick would never allow such a thing!

  “Well, I’m sure with your grades and athletics you wouldn’t have any problem getting in.” A serious-looking woman added, “They have an outstanding pre-med program.”

  “Pre-med?” This was too much. Me? A female doctor? Who ever heard of such a thing?

  “Look, I know you haven’t decided yet, and you still have another year of high school before you make your decision, but I want you to think about it. I love the program they have here and it would be so wonderful for you to follow in my footsteps and become a physician too.” She smiled lovingly at me.

  “But you know that you can pick any major you want. No pressure.” The man gave the woman a hard look. “As long as it’s practical.” He turned his focus back on me.

  I nodded to both of them stupidly. “I am not sure exactly. But I know it will be something in the area of science.” It fell out of my mouth before I realized what I was saying. My mind was whirling in a thousand different directions, yet in my heart and soul I had been dreaming of this very thing for as long as I could possibly remember.

  “Somehow that does not surprise me,” the man stated with a chuckle. The woman smiled but remained silent. The younger man was busy watching every female that walked by.

  “Let’s get something to eat before we check out the other end of campus.” The woman casually started strolling back towards the area in which we’d just come.

  The heat began to fade, and I could feel the coolness of my bedroom return. The bright sunlight was growing fainter, and I reached out my hands to physically hold onto it. I could feel the air escape from my lungs as I fought desperately to grasp the world that was slowly fading before my eyes.

  “Jocelyn? Jocelyn! Wake up! Open your eyes! Jocelyn, look at me!” William was gripping my shoulders tightly and screaming inches from my face.

  “No. No. No!” I sobbed. “It’s not fair!”

  “What is not fair?”

  I slowly opened my eyes, realizing that I was sitting upright in my bed, covered in perspiration, and screaming madly. My brother was seated beside me with a look of terror in his eyes. I closed my eyes tightly, wanting the world back that had just slipped through my fingers. It held all my dreams and everything I was denied. This strange new world held the key to my happiness, and I was determined to get back there.

  AUTHOR BIO

  A. L. Waddington completed her undergraduate studies at University of Texas Dallas and Indiana University Purdue University Indianapolis. She graduated from IUPUI with a BS in Psychology. She is an avid reader, enjoys spending time in her gardens, and cheering on the Indianapolis Colts. A. L. and her husband, Ty, have a son, two daughters, a very spoiled puppy, and an oversized cat. They reside in Indiana.

  PREVIEW OF

  ENLIGHTENED

  THE EVE SERIES

  BOOK TWO

  Chapter 1

  Sunday, November 01, 2009

  I WOKE UP as the sun was beginning to peek over the horizon. My head throbbed with visions of a large group of people sitting around a hearth, listening to a man read. Several of them I recognized. Others, I didn’t. Yet, strangely, I knew who they were. Stranger still, was the appearance of my Uncle Monte and his family. He appeared to be very happy as he spent the evening chatting with my father and brothers.

  I laid there running the events over and over in my head, trying to make some sense of it all, but I couldn’t. Then suddenly I got angry. Very angry.

  I jumped out of bed and quietly got dressed. I grabbed my winter jacket and boots and snuck out the sun porch. My car turned over with little noise. I turned up the heat and backed out of the driveway heading somewhere I never wanted to go. I knew vaguely where my uncle’s grave was in the cemetery on the other side of town, where my grandparents were buried.

  I parked on the north side and climbed out of my car, taking my umbrella with me, just in case. The air was musty, thick, and cold. Even though the sun had finally come up, it never penetrated the heavy cover of clouds. There was a faint drizzle coming down, and I hoped the rain would hold off for a while.

  After wandering around aimlessly for a short time, I finally stumbled across our family plots. My Uncle Monte was resting next to his father with his mother on the other side of her husband.

  I felt so out of place. I wasn’t sure exactly what I thought coming here would accomplish. I had never been here alone.

  I dusted the colorful drying leaves off his headstone and stared down at the dates. I knelt down in front of the headstone as large tears fell silently down my cheeks.

  “Why? Why did you do this to me?” I whispered. “If you knew this, thing. This EVE thing, was inherited, why did you leave me here to deal with it alone? Why aren’t you here to help me?”

  I sat down on the wet leaves. My shoulders slumped and let go of everything that had been pent up for the last several weeks.

  “Why? Why aren’t you here to answer my questions? There are so many things I want to ask you.” I sobbed uncontrollably.

  “How could you be so selfish? How could you just leave me here to figure this out on my own? I hate you! I hate you for being happy.”

  I climbed to my feet and paced back and forth in front of his grave. The drizzle turned into a light rain, but I couldn’t feel it. The adrenaline was pumping rapidly through my body, causing me to block the cold. I could only feel the hurt and anger. I leaned against a big oak tree and bent over with my hands on my knees. My mind was racing in a thousand different directions, but still the tears wouldn’t stop.

  I looked back up at my uncle’s headstone through my blurry vision and shook my head.

  “You knew there was a chance! You knew it! But you left me anyway. Why?” My screams echoed about the hollow cemetery.

  I slid down the tree and buried my head in my knees and wept.

  ***

  It was almost noon before I arrived back home. I was soaked to the bone and suffering the worst headache I’d had since I woke up in the hospital, after hitting my head on the coffee table. I climbed into the shower and let the hot water drown out my fears and sorrows.

  I decided not to call Jackson. I refused to come across as pathetic or even worse, needy. I paced relentlessly around my bedroom, glancing out my bay window every two seconds to see if there was any movement inside his house across the street. There was none.

  This is ridiculous!

  The whole story of soul switching, drifting, or whatever it is, seemed too farfetched to even be considered possible. I trusted them. I believed them. I believed in him. This was everything I was trying to avoid weeks ago when Jackson first entered my world.

  I sat down in my window seat and leaned my head against the cold glass. His house looked as empty as I felt. Tears welled back up in my eyes. I pulled my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them. My heart was ripping in half.

  “Jocelyn? Are you okay?” I looked in the direction of the voice to find my brother, Ethan standing in the doorway with a strange look on his face.

  I quickly wiped the tears off my cheeks.

  “Fine. Just feeling stupid and sorry for myself. That’s all.”

  He cro
ssed over and sat down on the other end of the window seat.

  “Jackson is downstairs. Do you want me to tell him you’ll call him later?”

  “He’s here? Are you serious?”

  “Yeah. So, what do you want me to do?”

  I couldn’t get my mind back to the same place it was yesterday. The morning had done a number on my nerves, after fighting all night not to sleep and being terrified of what would happen once I did.

  “Tell him I will be down in a minute.”

  I needed to fix myself up before Jackson saw me.

  Ethan headed to the door, rolling his eyes along his way.

  “Whatever. Girls.” I heard him mutter under his breath as he closed my door behind him.

  The two of them were both down in the basement rec-room watching an NFL game. Jackson was lounging on the couch wearing jeans and a long-sleeved, dark-green, tee-shirt. His dark, wavy, hair was carelessly perfect. His emerald, green, eyes lit up as he laughed at something my brother had said. He looked totally at ease in my home.

  “Hello, stranger.” I tried to keep my voice as steady as possible as I entered the room.

  “Good afternoon. I tried to call you.”

  He smiled and kissed me on the cheek when I sat down beside him.

  “I’m sorry. Somehow I must have put my phone on silent.”

  “I was beginning to think you were avoiding me,” he teasingly complained.

  “Sorry.”

  Jackson placed his hand on my knee. “No big deal. I live across the street.” He cocked his head slightly and curled his brow. “So it really was a lot of trouble coming all the way over here to speak with you.” He flashed me my favorite lopsided grin.

  “I believe that is my cue to leave. I’m going to go call Corbin and see how he’s feeling today after the party last night.” Ethan laughed as he climbed up the stairs.

  We sat in silence, waiting until we were sure we were alone. We held each other’s gaze, stating a thousand words without ever muttering a sound. I could feel the unexplainable bond to him. My love for him was so incredibly real and strong.

  “I was so worried about you. I could not sleep at all last night. I was up waiting for your call.” Jackson pulled me into his arms.

  “I was afraid to call you.” A weak laugh escaped halfheartedly. “I wanted to, but I couldn’t bring myself.”

  “Why?”

  “I was too terrified to sleep, and I didn’t want to tell you.”

  Jackson tightened his hold and lightly kissed me on the cheek.

  “I am always here for you. You never have to be scared of anything.”

  “I know,” I whispered. “I just don’t know how I’m supposed to feel about all this. It’s beyond strange.”

  I struggled against the tears again. I was determined not to break down in from of him.

  “Trust me. I have been in your shoes.” He cupped my face in his hands. “I know exactly the wide array of emotions that you are experiencing, and it does get easier with help and time.”

  “I feel so lost.”

  “You are not lost. No matter where you are, I am with you.”

  “Can I ask you something silly?”

  “Anything.”

  “What happened last night?”

  It had been driving me crazy. All morning, I kept wondering if what I remembered was real or not.

  “What do you mean?”

  “There. What happened there last night?”

  “It was just a typical Sunday.” Jackson shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly. “Church services. Family dinner. We have very large families. Then we listened to your brother, Jonathon read by the hearth for a while. It was completely uneventful.”

  I leaned back against the sofa, trying to comprehend it all. It still didn’t seem possible.

  “You wore a dark, green, dress today, and your hair was curled like you had it for the party. You looked so lovely.” Jackson smiled lovingly at me.

  I could feel myself blushing.

  “You know what is funny? You are you in both eras. You blush the same. Smile the same. Laugh the same. It is truly incredible.” He shook his head slightly in awe.

  “Is my personality the same?” I was so curious about this other me.

  “Almost. I mean, you are still you. But a slightly different version of you, because of the time period. Your grammar is much better there. You are more proper and lady-like. You definitely are more restrained in your words and actions. Here you express yourself freely; there you cannot. You also hate the fact that all your brothers got to go or are attending college and you are not allowed to. Here you seem to thrive in your thirst for knowledge.”

  “I can’t go to college?” I was confused. “Why?”

  “Your father, Patrick would never allow it. He is very old fashioned. He believes that a woman’s place is in running the home and tending to her husband and children.”

  “How provincial! Why don’t I just go anyway? It’s my life.”

  Jackson chuckled. “As much as you hate it, you would never openly disagree with him or defy his wishes. But you do sneak around and read books and newspapers behind his back.”

  “Really? That’s funny. I hardly pay attention to the news here.”

  “Well, the world is changing quite rapidly, I am afraid. And there, I believe, the fact that your father tries to restrict your awareness only heightens your curiosity.”

  “It must.”

  “As strange as I know it seems to you, you still maintain your core personality traits.”

  “How can I still be me? I mean, how do you keep everything straight?”

  I snuggled up onto his shoulder. He held me tightly for a few minutes before he answered.

  “I think maybe it would be best if you spoke with my parents, rather than me. I can tell you some things, but my family was essential in getting me through this. I was honestly terrified. The world no longer made any sense to me. I did not know what was real and what was not.”

  “Are your parents’ home?”

  My mind needed some answers, despite the terror I was feeling.

  “Actually, they are expecting us.” Jackson gave me a puzzled look. “Can I ask you something?”

  I nodded.

  “Why does your father, Shane not like me?”

  “He does. He’s only afraid of me getting hurt. He found your birthday gift the night I got injured. He read the inscription.”

  “I understand.” Jackson kissed me softly.

  I snuggled up against him and allowed all the tension to flow away from me.

  ***

  We joined his parents later that evening for dinner. His mother, Emily had made a roast and all the trimmings. We gathered around their dining room table that was set with an elegance that only Emily herself could pull off. His father, Robert stood at the head of the table, carved the roast and served everyone their plates before sitting down himself. Their proper statures still amazed me in comparison to how my family behaved.

  “How was your day today, you two?” Emily asked, passing around the dinner rolls.

  “Fine,” Jackson replied.

  I smiled and shook my head. “Does this EVE thing get easier?”

  “Yes, with time. I do not want you to believe that now, because you are aware of it, things will all magically merge and become incredibly simple. It does not. We all still have to consciously work at it every day. But having those around you who understand helps a great deal,” Emily explained.

  “We have to monitor everything we say. How we act, or react,” Robert continued. “It is not like we can make a reference to anything we know of history or rather history as we know it here. It can get quite complicated sometimes.”

  “How do you mean?” I asked.

  “It is not like you can make references to upcoming presidents or elections. The World Wars have not occurred yet. Science, technological advances, let alone Korea or Vietnam, the invention of the automobile, all of it. The vast majorit
y of your world here does not exist in your other life.” Robert explained, gesturing his hands for emphasis.

  I began to understand how difficult this was going to be.

  “So I have to act naïve in regards to everything?” I shrugged with a smile. “I suppose it’s a good thing that history is my worst subject.”

  That statement at least broke the serious tone and got a laugh from all.

  “It is allowing the courses of action to unfold as they may, even though we know of the horrible events that are yet to come. Tragedies, such as Hitler, Pearl Harbor, and the Holocaust or the sinking of the Titanic and thousands of other things still to come. We must never utter a word around anyone under no uncertain terms.”

  “We are not trying to scare you, Jocelyn. I am sure that it will still be some time before the barrier is completely disintegrated. At least a few weeks or so. Perhaps even longer. But these are things that you must know and follow by the letter.” Robert’s voice mimicked Emily’s.

  I suddenly got very uneasy. Jackson reached across the table and placed his hand over mine with a loving expression.

  “I know this is a lot to comprehend. But you need to know that we will all be here for you, to help you get through it.”

  All I could do was nod stupidly back. I stared at the three faces looking at me and felt like I was drowning in something that I couldn’t find my way out of.

  I placed my napkin down on the table. “I’m sorry. I am not feeling very well. Thank you so much for dinner, but I believe that I need to head home.”

  Jackson rose from the table while Robert and Emily exchanged puzzled looks.

  “I will walk you.” He placed his napkin on the table and started to push his chair under the table, but I interrupted.

  “No. Thank you. I will be fine. I just want to go home.”

  His face looked hurt, but I couldn’t help it. I had to get out of there as quickly as possible.

  “Please call me before you go to bed.”

  Jackson walked me to the front door. He reached out to hug me, but I quickly backed away from him and left before his hurt look could imprint fully in my consciousness.