“I think that she’s only doing this to get back in your bed.”
“Come on, Jo. Maybe she’s actually telling the truth. She does care about me, you know.”
“Oh, I know. Believe me, I know very well!”
“Hey!” Clark looked at Jody in surprise. “You’re not pissed, are you?”
“Yes, I am! Fuck that bitch and damn you for even contemplating this!”
Jody stood abruptly and marched over to the fridge and pulled out a bottle of beer. He was visibly upset.
“Where the fuck is this coming from?” Clark asked, moving toward the kitchen. “You think I want to jump in her bed just because I’ll be seeing her again?”
“Shit happens,” Jody deadpanned.
“Fuck you!” Clark spat out.
“Fuck her and this whole situation!” Jody said loudly. “Being in the closet is one thing, but to deliberately lie to the public and pretend you guys are a couple is wrong! What about your parents? Are they going to think that you’ve come to your senses and dropped the whole notion of being gay?” Jody moved forward and looked up at Clark, who was glaring at him. “What about your brothers? Are you going to tell Jason and Mike that everything you said about being gay was a lie? Because you can’t pretend to be with Nikki and still profess to love me. Lies have a way of getting out of hand, and if you aren’t consistent, it’ll all blow up in your face.”
“Jo-Jo, calm down.”
“No! I’m not calming down. Where does this leave us?”
“Nothing’s changed between us.”
“The hell it hasn’t! You’re already acting like a stranger, and this is only spring training. I can only imagine what it’s going to be like once the season starts.”
“You don’t understand.”
“Oh, I understand…. I understand that you’re going to walk away from me. Football is a lot more important than being in love!”
“Jo, I have to play football. It’s what I do best. It’s also my only chance to make enough money to pay my parents back.” Clark moved closer, hoping that Jody would be more receptive, but so far, he hadn’t budged. “Look, Jo. If being seen with Nikki once in a while will help the illusion, then I have to do it. I can’t risk any kind of talk. There’s too much at stake!”
“And where do I fit into this great scheme of yours? Are you going to slink in and out of my bed in the middle of the night? Why don’t you leave a hundred dollar bill on the nightstand while you’re at it!”
“Jo, why do you have to make this sound so ugly? You know how much I love you.”
“No, I don’t, Clark. I thought I did, but obviously, I come second to your career.”
“Don’t make me choose between you and football! Why are you backing me into a corner?”
“I don’t know,” Jody said, sighing in resignation. He turned away from Clark, hiding the sorrow that had quickly replaced the fury. The last thing he wanted was Clark’s pity. If he couldn’t have his love, he certainly didn’t want him to stick around because he felt sorry for him.
“Jody, I’m not as brave as you are. I can’t face the world and tell them I’m gay. Not yet.”
Jody spun around, ready to debate the issue, but saw that Clark was crying. He was stripped of all pride, looking hopelessly conflicted. “I’ll lose it all if I come out. Please… don’t push me away because I’m a coward.”
“Oh Kit,” Jody cried out and moved swiftly toward Clark. He wrapped his arms around Clark’s waist and rested his head on the massive chest. “You’re not a coward! I’m just being a jealous queen.”
Clark let out the breath he’d been holding, and he broke down and sobbed when Jody pressed against his body. “Jo-Jo, don’t you know how much I love you?” he whispered, his words almost desperate.
“I’m just an insecure fag.”
“Don’t say that! Please, don’t say that, Jo. It means that I haven’t shown you enough.”
“Kit, you show me plenty. I just have this dream, that’s all.”
“What dream?”
“You know, you and me, out and proud, walking off into the sunset. Romantic shit like in the movies.”
“Hey, it’s not a dream. It’ll happen; just not today.”
“I’m sorry I’m being such a drama queen,” Jody said, looking up at Clark with a wry grin. “Lil must be rubbing off on me.”
“Jo, don’t ever doubt that I love you. I may be a big closet case and a lying coward, but I love you so much it hurts sometimes. I would do anything for you.”
“Don’t sleep with her.”
“I give you my word,” Clark said, bending down to kiss Jody. They pressed against each other and moaned in a passionate duet that only escalated with every passing minute. “I don’t know what the future will bring,” Clark whispered, in between soft kisses, “but I don’t ever want you to doubt my love.”
“You’ll just have to keep reassuring me, Kit.”
“I can, and I will.” Clark pulled Jody toward the bed, looking at him hungrily as he removed his shirt. They stood at the foot of the bed and continued to stare into each other’s eyes, kicking off their shoes and then pulling down their pants and briefs. Finally, when they were both naked and visibly aroused, Clark stepped forward and pulled Jody up to him and said, “I want you to make love to me.”
Jody groaned and wrapped his arms around Clark’s neck and pulled him down on the bed. He lay on top of Clark and rubbed against him as they continued to kiss. They were both on fire, the need to show the depth of their love paramount. “Fuck me, Jo,” Clark whispered, his erection pressing rigidly against Jody’s matching boner.
Jody broke away from the kiss and looked at Clark in shock. “Kit, are you sure?”
Clark nodded, his eyes boring into Jody’s with an emotion so raw that it humbled Jody. He pressed his lips to Clark’s and ravaged him with his mouth, all the while listening as Clark moaned and pleaded, whimpering with need.
“I want you to make me yours, Jo.”
“God,” Jody cried out, desperately reaching for the lube they always kept beside the bed. He knelt in between Clark’s legs and applied it generously on both of them. He’d never been with a virgin before and the pressure to make this a good experience for the man who was gifting him with this final act of surrender was increasing the emotional level a hundredfold. “I love you, Kit,” he whispered, positioning himself.
“Take me. Everything I have… it’s all for you.” Clark’s eyes glittered, his world now centered on the man who hovered over him, and Jody bent down and pressed his mouth to his, even as he thrust past the tight ring, balls deep into a world of sensation like no other. He felt Clark tense up for just a second, the quick intake of breath a reaction to the sting that was all a part of the pleasure. “Okay, Kit?” he asked, pausing in his movements.
“Yes, yes—don’t stop.”
And Jody started to move again, slowly at first, in a sensual dance that he needed to drag out, to make it special and unforgettable, to sustain them for all the bad times that were sure to come. Tonight was all about giving, proving that they had something special that couldn’t be taken away, despite society and all the pressure. They needed this final act to remind them of how much they loved each other, and as Jody rolled his hips, glancing Clark’s prostate, hearing his lover cry out in surprise, he was reassured in the knowledge that no one could ever make Clark feel this way, no one could bring him to the heights of passion that he could. “I love you,” he murmured just as Clark’s body clenched and shuddered around him, squeezing him forcefully.
“I’m yours, Jo-Jo,” Clark declared, his heart thudding with emotion.
“I know, Kit, I know. Thank you for this.”
Chapter 24
v
JODY made his way down the corridor, heading for his office. It was the end of a long and uneventful day, made even longer because he didn’t want to be here. He loved his job, but he would have much preferred to be with Clark. Jody’s head had been in t
he clouds for the past eight hours because of Clark’s beautiful gesture last night. It was hot and romantic, and he’d been walking around with a grin on his face, dying to tell someone, but resisting the impulse to pick up the phone and call Lil. Allowing him to top had been the perfect way to seal their commitment, and Jody wanted to announce it to the world, even though he knew he couldn’t.
They’d made love one more time in the morning, and Clark had once again given himself with abandon, never hesitating for one minute.
“You’re everything to me,” Clark whispered, right after the most amazing orgasm of his life. It was a moment Jody would never forget, and if Clark meant to show him how much he cared, then he succeeded beyond his wildest dreams. The only way that Jody would leave now was if Clark physically pushed him out of his life or if he dropped dead.
He logged off his computer, picked up his pager and car keys, and left. The parking lot was full, and there was some daylight left so he didn’t call the security guard for an escort as he’d been doing since his car was vandalized. He didn’t feel the need tonight, confident in the fact that people were still coming and going. At his car, he disarmed the alarm and pulled the door open. As he was about to get in, a man appeared out of nowhere and pushed him into the car roughly. He ripped the keys out of Jody’s hand before he could reactivate the alarm, and shoved him over to the passenger’s side. The stranger in black got into the driver’s seat, started the engine, and drove off.
“Who the hell are you?” Jody couldn’t believe this was happening. The guy glanced at Jody. He looked like a thug from a third-rate film, with a day’s worth of stubble and watery blue eyes rimmed in red, as if he hadn’t slept in forever. Jody detected a combination of cigarette smoke and strong body odor, making him nauseous.
“Don’t try anything dumb, Doc. I’ve got a gun in my coat pocket, and I won’t hesitate to use it.”
Jody’s heart thudded wildly when he heard that. “What do you want from me? Money? I don’t carry that much cash, but you’re welcome to whatever I’ve got.”
“No, that’s not why I’m here.”
“What, then?”
“Let’s just say that I’m here to deliver a message.”
The stranger pulled a hard right into an alley off one of the side streets. He drove with clear determination, then stopped the car abruptly in an isolated area before yanking Jody over to his side of the car and out of the vehicle.
As soon as they cleared the door, the kidnapper punched Jody in the stomach and followed that with a strong jab under his chin, slamming Jody’s head against the car. “This is courtesy of the boys in Folsom.”
Jody lifted his arm to try to protect himself, only to have it pushed aside as the guy laughed in his face. “Do you really think you can stop me? I could kill you right now if I wanted to, but that’s a lot more money and not part of this contract.”
“Please,” Jody begged, hoping he could talk his way out of this. “I’ll double whatever they’re paying you, if you’ll just leave me alone.”
“That sounds real good, Doc, but here’s the thing.” The guy was now inches away from him, his breath a blast from hell. “I hate fags just as much as my boss does. You need a little reminder of who you’re dealing with. Don’t fuck with football players and keep your sorry mug off the Internet! One more picture of you sucking face with Stevens and you’re a dead man!” He kneed Jody in the nuts so forcefully that Jody landed on all fours. He could hear himself wheezing while he tried to catch the breath just ripped out of him.
“Why are you doing this?” Jody gasped.
“Why?” His attacker kicked him in the ribs and once more in the area of his spleen. Jody thought he heard the crack of bone and wondered if the bastard had torn one of his major organs, but he was in too much pain to try to diagnose himself. “Because you fags think that you can move right in and destroy a person’s life just because you have this need to get sucked off by a real man.”
“It’s not like that!”
“Don’t tell me what it is or isn’t, you cocksucker! Stay away from the kid, or the next time will be the last time.” His attacker followed up his hateful words with one more swift kick to Jody’s groin before he got in the car, started the engine, and drove off.
Jody lay on the ground, thankful that he’d been abandoned, although he had no idea where. He tried to sit up, conscious of a sharp pain in his side that likely meant a cracked rib and maybe a punctured lung. He fumbled for his cell phone and dialed 911, hoping they’d be able to find him now that the phone emanated a signal. He tried to stay awake as he waited for help, slurring out his name and approximate location, but he kept drifting in and out of consciousness. Eventually the pain blanketed him, and he passed out cold.
The next thing he remembered was lying on a gurney in his own emergency room, looking up at the face of one of the residents.
“Doc. What the fuck, man? What happened to you?”
“I got hit by a Mack truck.”
“No shit! Who did this to you?” he asked while palpating him gingerly to check for broken bones. “We’re going to need an X-ray, Doc.”
“And a CT scan and ultrasound,” Jody added. “I think the fucker tore my spleen and most likely cracked my rib.”
“I’m on it, Doc,” the resident assured him. “You want me to call anyone?”
“No! Wait, yeah. You’d better call my friend. His name’s Lil.” Jody gave him Lil’s number just as he started drifting off again.
“CLARK?”
“Who is this?”
“It’s Lil.”
“Oh, hey. What’s going on?”
“Jody asked me to call. He’s having some big emergency at work and won’t be home tonight.”
“How come he could call you, but he couldn’t call me?”
“I have no idea, sweetie. It is what it is.”
“I guess. Did he say when he’ll be home?”
“Sometime tomorrow night.”
“What’s the big emergency?”
“No clue, sweetheart. Gotta run!”
“Okay.” I hung up and moved over to the refrigerator to scrounge for food. Jody usually brought dinner over, but tonight I needed to fend for myself. I turned on the TV to see if there was any news about the emergency that was keeping him away. Nothing was mentioned about any kind of crisis that might affect the hospital’s normal routine.
I picked up the phone and speed-dialed Nikki, deciding to call her while I was alone. It was better that we talk whenever Jody wasn’t around. She had the ability to bring out the worst in him, and I hated dealing with it. I knew that it was normal for him to be jealous—she was my ex-lover after all—but I had absolutely no desire to bed her or any other woman, for that matter. I was not only in love with Jody, I was in lust, big time. The mild ache in my ass was a constant reminder of my new status in the bedroom, and instead of freaking out, I wanted more. Thinking about last night and this morning made me horny, and I couldn’t wait for him to get back. It sucked that I wouldn’t be able to see him for another twenty-four hours.
My thoughts went back to last night. Our lovemaking defied description other than it was the culmination of a long-term fantasy, and the fact that Jody had been the one to give me this experience only served to make me love him that much more. I couldn’t have been more committed if we’d stood in front of a priest and put on wedding rings. Of course, I’d have to prove this to him, because wanting to stay in the closet for now seemed like a complete contradiction to everything I was feeling. I was giddy with joy, wanting to shout it out to the world and tell them how much I loved him. However, the reality of our situation was sobering, and I knew I had to be practical. And even as I thought those words, Nikki’s voice came on the line.
“Clark?”
“Yeah.”
“What’s going on?”
“Not much. I called to tell you I’m taking you up on the offer.”
“Really?”
She sounded much
too happy, so I decided to set things straight once and for all. “I want you to know that Jody and I are grateful, but you need to understand that this is all a charade. I am gay, Nikki. Jody and I are lovers.”
I heard her gasp, and I knew my directness shocked her. Even though she’d accused me of this, it was different since I admitted it.
“Oh—my—God.”
“What? Do you want to rescind the offer?”
“No, of course not! I just need time to process this.”
“We can meet twice a week. Once at the tavern, when the rest of the team is there, and one other night we can decide on later. I want to be seen by a lot of people, so no quiet dinners at your place or movies.”
“That’s fine,” she agreed, in an unusually somber tone. She was probably still trying to wrap her head around my admission.
“Clark?”
“Yes?”
“Did you hate it when you were fucking me?”
God. I didn’t want to deal with her wounded ego; on the other hand, I wasn’t going to lie. She was probably the only person other than Jody who was going to get a straight answer from me. “I didn’t hate it, Nik. I just love Jody more.”
“I see.”
“No, you don’t, but it doesn’t matter. The long and short of this is that whatever we had was great at the time we had it. But it isn’t what I want or need.”
“And he is?” Her voice had the unmistakable sound of tears being held back, but I wasn’t going to sugar coat my answer.
“I love him more than anything else in my life.”
“Do your parents know?”
“We’ve had a huge falling-out over this, but I suspect that they won’t be talking to you about it.”
“Why not? They think we’re practically engaged.”
Clark sighed. “And they probably want to see that happen. Really be engaged, that is.”
“Should I say anything?”
“No! Let it go. We’ll just do our own thing, and if they ask you about it, refer them to me.”
Horizons Page 18
