Lost Lyric (Found in Oblivion Book 4)

by Cari Quinn

  He slipped his fingers into her hair at the base of her skull and rubbed. “Fair enough.”

  Before her eyeballs could cross, she pushed him away. “Keep that up and I’ll be out like a light.”

  “No way. I have plans for you.”

  She cupped his cheek, rubbing her thumb across his scruffy cheek. “Are you shaving this for tomorrow?”

  He itched his throat where the stubble climbed into his shirt. “I think my mom would skin me if I didn’t.”

  “Really?”

  He grinned. “Yeah. But I’ll wait to do it until after tonight.” He dragged his knuckle down the side of her neck. “I like leaving my marks on you.”

  She shivered. There was nothing quite like the buzz and burn all over her skin when Ryan was through with her. She stood up. “Yeah, I’m ready to go.”

  He laughed and stood with her before lowering his mouth to hers. The kiss didn’t spin out like it usually did. It was achingly perfect and sweet. So much so that her eyes welled up behind her lids. When he pulled back, she ducked her head quickly and went down the stairs before he could see the tears she had to dash away.

  He caught her hand and dragged her back to his side as they went through the parking garage to the entrance of the casino. As soon as the large angel statue in the foyer came into view, her stomach plummeted.

  Vegas.

  In all its glory.

  Ryan’s grip tightened on her hand as his eyes whirled to all of the stations in the casino. Baccarat, blackjack, slots, and the all-important poker tables reached as far as the eye could see.

  Her shoulders tightened instantly. “Ryan.”

  He swung his gaze to hers. “I’ve been in a casino before, Colorado. I’m not jonesing.”

  “They why are there huge heart bubbles in your eyes?”

  “Everyone with half a brain cell wants to try their luck. Especially when you know the tricks I do.” He laughed. “Don’t give me that death ray.” He tapped his inner elbow. “I promise I’m not an addict.” He shook her arm with their clasped hands. “Did I make a mistake in New York? Yes. I got in over my head. I was winning and I got cocky.”

  “Cocky enough to get yourself hurt. Actually, more like stomped on by big burly dudes.”

  “No need to remind me.”

  She released a breath as her heart raced. “I think maybe I do. Pit bosses here would make your run-in with those guys look like a tickle party.”

  He tipped his head and curled his arm around her back until they were face to face and their thighs bumped. “And how do you know so much?”

  Her heartbeat throbbed between her ears. “I just do.” A year of flying back and forth between Vegas and New York gave her a lot of knowledge. How many times had she come in here with him? How many times had she seen the darker side of Vegas?

  Just once in all its twisted glory, when Marco’s mask had finally fallen away.

  Before then, she hadn’t wanted to see the grime beneath the glitz, so she’d rationalized the ominous things she’d seen. The secret conversations, the veiled threats, the shady accomplices. Until she couldn’t anymore.

  “I think it’s more than that.”

  She shook off the memories. “I just worry about you. I can’t help it. What if I hadn’t come around that night?”

  He pulled her closer. “I would have woken up and called someone.”

  “Me?”

  “Well, I didn’t exactly like the idea of you in that alley, but yeah, I would have called you or Mikey.”

  She pressed her free hand against his chest, her fingers curling into his faded Metallica shirt. “I don’t want you in that position again. I couldn’t take losing you like that.”

  “You won’t. I swear it.”

  He didn’t know the shit she brought to the table. Who she’d been when she was with Marco. How blinded she’d been by the lifestyle he’d shown her. And worst of all, how far and fast she’d run once she’d figured out how unhinged he could be. Her former lover just happened to work for the Andrettis, a notorious mob family with businesses in both New York and Vegas.

  Marco had been making a name for himself within the family when they’d met. By the time she’d seen the full breadth of his possessive tendencies, it had been too late.

  God, she’d been so stupid. On so many levels.

  She’d cut people off for so long, but pushing Ryan away wasn’t an option anymore. It was as if she were missing an appendage when he wasn’t around.

  He drew her past the elevators. “Let’s go check in. I’m tired of sharing you with anyone, even strangers.”

  She shivered and nodded. Too many eyes with too many memories around her. It had been years. Ghosts didn’t seem to care how many days it had been. Eighteen-hundred-sixty-four days to be exact—give or take.

  Five years should be enough time for Marco to forget about her. She had to believe that.

  Hell, maybe the things he’d said to her—the threats couched as not-so-playful admonitions—had just been smoke and mirrors. Maybe he’d moved on right after she’d split town.

  She could hope. Hope was free, if not in plentiful supply.

  Ryan led her to a huge gilded desk with a smiling man behind the semi-circular counter. “Welcome. Do you have a reservation?”

  Ryan nodded and gave his information. Because everything about Ripper Records ran like a well-oiled machine, it took barely five minutes to produce their key cards and a room number. A room with a very high number.

  She had to hand it to Donovan Lewis. He didn’t skimp when it came to the important things. And tomorrow was huge for these guys. She had to remember this entire trip was about them, and not her baggage.

  When the elevator opened to an empty car, Ryan hauled her inside and pinned her to the wall Fifty Shades of Grey style. They’d watched the movie in the dead of night in her bunk one night. He’d made fun of it the entire time, but the elevator scene?

  Yeah, it was memorable.

  And even better with Ryan holding her arms up above her head until she had to go onto her toes with the stretch. “I want you to come to the awards ceremony with me.”

  “What?” Confusion dented the rush of sexy-times hormones that had finally pushed away the buzzy fear.

  “I’m tired of pretending you aren’t the most important person in my life. I want you beside me tomorrow night. Hell, Colorado, I want you beside me—”

  “Don’t you say it.” Panic rose up and nearly choked her, but she got the words out. The elevator chimed and the doors opened. She wiggled free and across the threshold with Ryan on her heels.

  “Dammit, Denver.” He huffed behind her. “Go right.”

  She veered down the hallway and followed his instructions to the correct room number. She waited beside the door as he jammed the card into the slot a few times before it beeped with a green light. He held the door open for her and she skirted by him.

  He tossed the card on the table inside the door and flicked the lights on. Their bags had already been delivered to the room, and sat on a bench at the end of the lake-size bed that dominated the space. She gasped at the window looking out onto the strip. The view of the endless lights and eerie, inky blackness swarmed her brain. Memories of rooms just like this with him—with Marco—overlapped with the excitement of being with Ryan.

  She pressed her fingers to the window.

  He came up behind her. “Please just talk to me, Den.”

  “Obviously, you’ve figured out that I have baggage.”

  “We all do.”

  She huffed out a harsh laugh. “Did yours require a name change to run away from?”

  His arms came around her waist and he tucked his chin against her neck. He was always so present and patient. So much more than she deserved.

  “Okay, I’m listening.”

  She slid her palm along the corded strength of his forearm. The soft golden hairs that sprinkled across the top then the smooth skin along his wrist teased the pads of her fingertips
. “It was a long time ago. I was a different girl. A frightened one who didn’t know how to handle the things I needed.”

  “Things I can give you.” His voice was low in her ear.

  “Yes.” She lifted her hand to his cheek.

  He turned his face to kiss the inside of her wrist. “I’ll always give you what you need, Colorado.”

  “I know. I knew from that night in the Hummingbird. I didn’t want to admit it. I’ve been running from that side of me for years, Ry.”

  He tightened his hold. “Did someone hurt you?”

  She nodded. “Yes, but probably not the way you’re thinking. I’d been with some guys before him, but he was different. Older. Established. He showed me so many things I’d never known before, as clichéd as it sounds.”

  Ryan’s breath whistled out between his teeth. “Then he took it too far?”

  “Not the sex. Not exactly.” She dropped her forehead to the cool glass. God, trying to navigate what had happened was hard enough in her own head. Trying to tell someone else—to tell the most vital someone else—was nearly impossible.

  “He didn’t have a normal job. The people he knew, some of them weren’t aboveboard. A lot of them weren’t. And when I noticed too much, he found ways of shutting me down.” As Ryan tensed, she shifted in his arms. “He never hurt me physically, I swear.”

  Ryan didn’t reply.

  “God, it’s all in the past. But sometimes I can’t help remembering.”

  “Because of me. Because of us, what we do.”

  The pain in Ryan’s voice had her gripping his biceps. “No. We’re separate. We’re so different. I’ve loved everything we’ve shared. But with—”

  She couldn’t quite spit it out. Marco’s name had become so huge in her head. For God’s sake, his name was on par with Voldemort from Harry Potter. And she knew it was her own fault for letting him become so big.

  So very important.

  She was so tired of Marco taking everything from her, even now.

  “Being with him grew too overwhelming for me,” she said, knowing she was copping out and unable to stop it. Even saying this felt like too much, and she couldn’t breathe. “I was a mess, Ry. I dropped out of college. I just ran. Donovan helped me get away. Helped me start over.”

  “Donovan? Why?”

  Swallowing deeply, she cupped Ryan’s jaw. It was time to face some of her demons. “Donovan is my uncle.”

  Chapter Seventeen

  Dumbfounded, Ryan could only stare at her. Uncle? One of the most influential millionaires in the country? For fuck’s sake, he was pretty sure a few countries. He didn’t quite know all the ins and outs of Donovan Lewis’s empire.

  “You’re rich?”

  She laughed. Well, it was more of a squeak than a laugh. “I wouldn’t go that far. The Lewis name has money. My parents do.”

  “And they didn’t help?”

  She looked down, her eyes trained on his chest. “Not really their kind of deal.”

  “You’re a Lewis?”

  She nodded. “Casey Lewis.”

  “Casey Lewis.” The name felt wrong on his tongue.

  “Colorado,” she said hoarsely. “Denver.” Her voice grew a little stronger. “I’m not that girl anymore.”

  He frowned and tipped her chin back up so he could look into her eyes. “Why Donovan?”

  “He has contacts everywhere and he has a way with taking care of details. And not asking a ton of questions.” She averted her gaze. “I was ashamed of what I’d gotten myself into. Of the man I let myself get involved with.”

  Before Ryan could press the point, she touched his cheek. “I want to be with you too. I know I haven’t always been straightforward about that, but I swear I do. More than I thought was possible. I just need to talk to Donovan first before you shout it to the world. Is that okay?”

  “Why?”

  “Because this life means everything to me. You guys and my job. I never thought this was what would make me happy, but after…” Her lips thinned. “Donovan picked me up and handed me this life. He gave me the chance to start over.”

  Ryan’s chest tightened. Anger filled his mouth and swelled his tongue like acid. “No matter how you tiptoe around it, this guy hurt you.”

  “No. No, Ryan. You need to believe me on this. He didn’t hurt me like that.” Finally, her gaze met his again without him forcing the issue. And he hated that he had to force her to do anything. Not if this pain was in her past.

  She went on her toes and cupped his face. “He’s nothing like you. What was between us, what we did…it was nothing like how you take care of me.” She pressed her lips together and shut her eyes so tight that his gut churned. Then she opened them. Those unbelievably huge, fathomless dark eyes wrecked him, laying him bare. “He only took. You only give.”

  He crushed her to him, his mouth slanting over hers. Her arms slid under his, her hands cupping his shoulders as he lifted her onto her toes. He broke away, dragging her breath into his lungs. She filled him in so many fucking ways.

  “You’re everything, Denver.” She would always be his Denver. A different first name couldn’t change who she was to him. Nothing could. “You have to know that.”

  “Show me.”

  He swung her into his arms. She was solid, warm, and fit him so completely. He nodded to the fluffy gold and navy spread on the bed. “I want you in the middle of this bed. Spread out for me.”

  She reached down and flipped the corner back enough for him to push the rest with his knee before he set her in the center. He flicked the pillows away so she was flat on her back.

  He knelt over her. “What do you need?”

  “You. I need you to help me put it away.” She sucked in air. “This room is full of ghosts.”

  Tamping down on his frustration at needing to know more took all his effort. But this was about her. Everything was. “Nothing but us here now, Colorado.”

  She nodded. “Make me yours.”

  His cock tightened painfully. Despite what he’d learned and all his questions, he couldn’t help wanting her this way. Just as he knew there was a part of her that would always crave him taking control. And he wanted to be the one to give it to her.

  Always.

  He flicked open the tiny buttons of her lightweight shirt. The baby blue color made her skin seem even warmer. All that honey-gold flesh waiting for him.

  He palmed her breast, her nipple tight against the heel of his hand. He rubbed it across the tip roughly. The lace of her scrap of a bra barely held her. She was round, firm and just enough to fill his hands. Her breasts were perfect. But he didn’t want a peek through cotton.

  Nothing but endless skin would sate him tonight. No quick fuck against a wall. No fierce bump and grind in a bunk, praying no one would come back to the bus while they were together.

  None of that would do tonight.

  He inched down her thighs, tightening the cage around her legs until they were clamped shut. At least for now. Soon he’d have her wide open. But first he needed her clothes off. He shoved her shirt off her shoulders and flicked open her bra so both of them slid away. He eased the elastic off her ponytail as well until there was nothing but a wash of sable hair across the white sheets.

  “Fucking beautiful.”

  She lifted her chin, watching him with huge eyes full of passion and bravery. She shuddered under him and he lowered his mouth between her breasts. He dragged his chin down the skin there to her ribs and down around her navel. She arched under him, her fingers going into his hair.

  He wasn’t quite sure he could handle her touching him yet. He was already riled up. Protective instincts he didn’t know he owned were bucking under his skin, trying to tear out of the marrow of his bones. He wanted to demand the backstory living in her breath, haunting her eyes. But he knew for now she needed this more.

  He needed to connect to her.

  She needed to know he’d do anything for her. His only demand would ever be her pleasure
and her love. But small steps were necessary for this woman. Now that he knew some of her past, he was starting to understand.

  Tonight he would show her pleasure and love without end.

  Starting with his tongue and her skin. He traced along the line of her jeans before flicking open the button so he could peel them from her. Endless inches of soft honey-scented skin were his to taste. But first he would tease. His breath fanned over her tightly shorn pussy. The little strip of dark hair arrowed down to her pink slit.

  He breathed her in. Already wet for him and he hadn’t really touched her.

  She looked down at him, her hands fisted beside her thighs. He wished for ties right then. To open her up for him.

  He didn’t really have anything in his bag except for the cuffs they’d played with, but they seemed too hard. The metal too intrusive for this moment. He needed something softer.

  He trailed his lips along the bowl of her flat belly and up over her ribs to her breasts. He braced himself above her with one arm and his wrist brushed against the pillow.

  “Hmm.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” Her voice was little more than a breathless groan.

  “What’s your word tonight, Colorado?”

  “What?”

  “Your word.” He changed his stance so he was kneeling between her legs this time. He rose up and lifted the pillow.

  She swallowed. “Oh.” She looked around the room and settled on the pillow in his hands. “Gold.”

  “Good.” He reached inside the pillowcase and dragged out the pillow, tossing it to the floor. The nice thing about a king-size bed meant king-size pillows. The case was long and soft. Just what he needed. He folded it lengthwise until it was one long column of sateen material. He grasped her wrist and brought it to the outside of her knee.

  Her gaze zeroed in on the pillowcase. “God, yes.”

  He smiled as he wrapped the material around one knee then tied it to her wrist with a link in between. Almost like a handle with a knot for him to hold on to, but not cut into her flesh. “We’ll see if you’re still saying yes when I’m done with you.”