His Mistletoe Proposal

by Christy McKellen

She’d sounded so happy for him about the band’s contract that he’d not been able to bring himself to ask the questions that had plagued him all night, keeping him awake till the early hours.

  Don’t you care about me at all?

  Would you be willing to stay in England for me?

  Do you love me like I love you?

  But of course he’d not asked her a single one of them.

  He couldn’t see any way to persuade her he was worth taking a risk on—that he could provide just as fulfilling a life for her here in England as her high-powered job did in the States.

  She’d never intended to stay here long-term, so why would she change her mind now?

  He remembered how she’d laughed about what an odd couple they’d make when he’d first met her. But did she really still feel like that after everything they’d shared?

  He certainly didn’t. It seemed completely clear to him now that they were actually perfect together. They complemented each other, made each other think and experience things in a totally new way. That had to be a good thing. Didn’t it?

  He certainly thought so. He knew now that he wanted Flora in his life, challenging him and making him feel things he’d never felt without her. But he was keenly aware that if he wanted her to stay—and he really did, so much it made his head throb—just like with his musical career, he was going to have to take some risks and work damn hard for what he really wanted.

  And never, never give up.

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  A FEW DAYS LATER, Flora let herself into her flat after another long, gruelling day at work. To her huge relief, the UK launch was finally live and the whole frustrating project was over and done with so she could finally get her life back. As she walked inside she noticed a small padded envelope lying on the mat below her letter box. She guessed that her upstairs neighbour must have posted it through for her so it didn’t get lost in the jumble of junk mail by the door in the communal entryway.

  There was something about the shape and size of it that made her heart beat faster. Tearing off the top of the envelope, she turned it on its end and shook it, watching a recordable CD case slip out of it into her hand. There wasn’t a note inside, but scrawled across the inner slip under the clear case were the words:

  This one’s for you, Flora.

  Love, Alex

  Hands trembling, she went over to the stereo system that had come with the flat and slid it into the CD drawer.

  She’d expected to hear Nina Simone or Billy Holiday or even Leonard Cohen—as a reminder that they’d always be friends perhaps. So when Alex’s beautiful gravelly voice started playing through the speakers the blood rushed so quickly to her head she had to sit down and take a few calming breaths. Her heart thumped hard in her chest as she listened to every single song on the disc, unable to move as the beautiful piano music washed over her and his voice moved through her like a pain-relieving drug.

  And she had tingles everywhere.

  As she concentrated on the lyrics, her earlier euphoria began to drain away as she realised she was listening to Alex singing love songs about a woman who had beguiled and inspired him. Someone who had made him feel music in his soul. Tia. The songs had to be about her.

  And then the final song came on and it was explicitly clear that this one was about someone else entirely.

  Amy.

  The lyrics were so loving and poignant that tears rushed to her eyes. She sat there, paralysed with grief, sobbing hard as memories of her friend whirled through her head in a dizzying kaleidoscope of images.

  Alex had put into words exactly how it had felt to lose her best friend.

  It made one thing starkly clear. He completely understood her.

  Just like Amy had done.

  Getting up on wobbly legs, she went over to the drawer where she’d been keeping Amy’s letter recently, carefully lifting it out, then smoothing it down on the dining table to read it. Her gaze skimmed over the beginning until she got to the part she was looking for:

  I’m so proud of you for all that you’ve achieved. I always knew you’d be successful in whatever you did, but your drive and determination have astounded even me. I know you probably won’t take a minute to step back and see the enormity of what you’ve accomplished, but get this: you truly are an incredible person, as well as the kindest, most generous woman I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing.

  She’d always skipped over that part before, racing to get on to the favour Amy had asked of her, but now she stopped to think about what her friend had been trying to tell her: that she could have whatever she wanted if only she put her mind to it.

  If she wanted to branch out and start her own business, then she could do that. She certainly had the experience and knowledge to make her own initiative a success. She’d not done it up till now because she’d been afraid to leave the safe confines of someone else’s business.

  But it was time to stop being safe and move on to the next stage of her life. One she was in total control of. If she found herself working with someone who didn’t treat her with the respect she deserved, then she’d no longer work with them. Simple as that.

  She was going to be her own woman from now on.

  Excitement fizzed through her at the thought of it, lifting her beleaguered spirits. Yes, she was going to start acting like the woman Amy had always seen her as.

  It was time to stop blaming her feelings of inadequacy on other people and take stock of her life.

  If that meant starting her own business—just like Alex had suggested on New Year’s Eve—then she’d do it on her terms and build it entirely from her own blood, sweat and tears.

  Make it something to be truly proud of.

  After meeting Alex and enjoying living in Bath, then making peace with what had happened with Violet and her family, she’d started having serious reservations about going back to her job in the States anyway. Perhaps this was the right time to move permanently back to England.

  What was there in New York for her now anyway? A few friends she’d made over the last year or so, but no one particularly close. Not like Amy. Certainly no one like Alex. He was one of a kind.

  She loved that about him.

  Taking a breath, she pushed back her shoulders. Yup. She loved him.

  And even if she couldn’t have him, she wasn’t going to let that stop her from taking the rest of her future into her own hands.

  Alex was her friend and always would be, she hoped, and she wanted to let him know that she’d always be there for him too. She needed to tell him that, even if it would be the most painful, heart-wrenching thing she’d ever done.

  She also wanted him to know how much he’d inspired her to make some positive changes in her life.

  Yes, telling Alex all about her plans would be exactly the right thing to do to cement them. But she didn’t want to do it over the phone. She wanted to look him in the eye and say it.

  Giving her face a quick scrub in the bathroom, she decided not to bother putting make-up on. He genuinely didn’t seem to care whether she wore it or not. In fact, he seemed to prefer her looking natural and unconcealed.

  Striding into the hall, she pulled on her boots and grabbed one of her coats from the peg, not even stopping to check whether it matched with the rest of her outfit, then let herself out of her flat.

  She walked quickly towards Alex’s place, hoping he’d be in and on his own. She didn’t fancy saying her piece in front of Tia, but now she’d made up her mind she didn’t want to lose the momentum of her decision either.

  When she finally reached his door, she rang the bell for a good few seconds to make sure he heard it. Waiting impatiently, she tapped her foot and drummed her fingers against her legs, her heart thumping hard in her chest.

  She was a little breathless from walkin
g so fast, and probably from the adrenaline rushing through her blood too. She took a couple of moments to compose herself, wanting to seem cool and relaxed when he opened the door.

  After what felt like eons she heard the lock turn and the door swung open to reveal the breathtaking sight of Alex looking rumpled, but ridiculously sexy, in a T-shirt and jeans. His feet were bare, as if he’d just thrown on clothes after rolling out of bed.

  ‘Sorry,’ she said instinctively, ‘I hope I didn’t disturb anything.’ Her insides did a slow, uncomfortable somersault as it occurred to her that he might have left Tia in bed.

  He frowned at her, then rubbed at his eyes as if he thought he was imagining her there.

  ‘Flora. You’re here.’ He said it as if he’d been waiting for her to come and was relieved that she’d finally arrived.

  ‘Er... I just thought I’d pop over to say thanks,’ she gabbled, a little panic-stricken by the thought of Tia overhearing them.

  He stared at her with a bemused frown on his face, then rubbed a hand over his eyes, looking thoroughly exhausted.

  ‘Sorry, I was asleep on the sofa. Thanks? For what?’

  He’d been asleep on the sofa? So he was alone then. Relief flooded through her. ‘For the music you sent me,’ she said, giving him a grin that she had to work hard for.

  His perplexed expression cleared, to be replaced with a dazzling smile. ‘And not just any music,’ he said. ‘Every one of those songs was written by me.’

  Her heart did a slow flip. ‘I thought I recognised your dulcet tones and I suspected it was your work. There was something about the songs that felt very you.’

  He nodded thoughtfully. ‘Want to come in?’ he asked, sounding a little uncertain.

  She hesitated, but only for a second. Now that she was here she really didn’t want to leave until she’d told him about her epiphany.

  ‘Er...yes, great,’ she said, stepping into the hallway, aware of her legs trembling with nerves.

  He led the way into his flat and took her coat from her, then gestured for her to go through to the living room.

  ‘Want a drink?’ he asked.

  She suspected from his slightly antsy manner that he was hoping she’d refuse.

  ‘No, thanks.’ She sat down on his sofa and breathed in the wonderfully familiar smell of him as he sat down next to her.

  ‘So what did you think?’

  ‘About the songs?’

  ‘Yeah.’

  She could tell from the anticipation in his face he was desperately hoping she’d liked them.

  ‘They’re wonderful,’ she said truthfully. ‘Very moving. In fact they all gave me frisson and a couple of them made me cry.’

  ‘Really?’ He seemed ridiculously pleased to hear he’d been able to turn her into a blubbering, overemotional wreck.

  ‘Yeah, proper ugly crying.’

  ‘That’s great,’ he said, flashing her his gorgeous smile again, making her drag in a painful breath at the heart-wrenching sight of it. She’d missed seeing it so much over the last week.

  ‘So I have some news,’ he said, shuffling back on the sofa.

  ‘Oh? About the band?’ she asked, bracing herself for him to say it was actually about him and Tia.

  ‘No, not the band. About the songs I gave you. I’ve started sending them out to record labels to try and get my solo career off the ground.’

  ‘Really? That’s fantastic news! Good for you!’ Despite her heartache she still felt a rush of joy for him. ‘Amy would be so proud of you,’ she added.

  His brow crinkled into a frown. ‘Yeah, I’d like to think so.’

  Flora took a breath, wanting to get the painful part out in the open and over and done with. ‘So I guess you’re going to be really busy, touring with the band soon too.’

  ‘I’ve resigned from the band.’

  She stared at him. ‘Really? But what about Tia? Won’t it make it hard on your relationship if you’re both off doing different things?’

  His frown deepened and he crossed his arms over his broad chest. ‘I’m not in a relationship with Tia. I told her I wasn’t interested in getting back together.’

  The room seemed to lurch from under her. ‘When?’ Her voice shook on the word.

  ‘On New Year’s Eve.’

  ‘What? But it looked like—’ She paused and swallowed, remembering the piercing pain she’d felt in her chest at the sight of the two of them kissing.

  He uncrossed his arms and sat forwards, closer to her. ‘I did consider taking her back, but only for a second and only because she was still going to be here when you were primed to jet back to the States.’

  She blinked at him, her brain having trouble catching up with what he was saying. ‘But you were kissing her,’ was what came out when she was finally able to speak.

  He shook his head. ‘She kissed me. And yes—’ he held up his hands ‘—I kissed her back, but only because she took me by surprise. I realised straight away what a total idiot I’d be to even contemplate getting back with her when I could have you. There was never any contest.’

  The room lurched again. ‘Really?’ She could barely breathe with excitement.

  ‘Yes. Really.’

  ‘But those songs you sent me—’

  He raised his eyebrows. ‘Yes?’

  ‘I thought you’d written them about Tia.’

  He gave her a look that said, Don’t be an idiot.

  ‘They’re the songs I wrote right after Christmas, when things were so good between us. You inspired them. They’re about you, Flora.’

  ‘But...but...they’re love songs.’

  ‘Yes. Exactly.’

  She was trembling all over now. ‘So you’re saying—’

  ‘Yes. I love you.’

  He moved towards her and slid his hand against her jaw, cupping her face so she had to look at him.

  ‘I don’t just want to be your friend, Flora. I want to have a proper relationship with you. I know it’s all happened so fast, but I’ve never felt so sure of anything in my life.’

  ‘Wow.’ She swallowed hard, her head spinning. ‘I want us to be more than friends too. I think I have since the moment I saw you stroll into the Pump Room.’

  ‘Looking like a vagrant,’ he teased.

  Heat rose to her face. ‘Yes, well, I’m not exactly proud of myself for the way I acted then.’ She gave him a beseeching smile. ‘But we all have our faults, right?’

  He smiled. ‘Absolutely. I know I do. I don’t know what I was thinking, expecting you to just give up everything you’d worked so hard for to be with me.’ He shook his head. ‘I was being totally selfish. I’m the one that should be flexible because it doesn’t matter to me where we live. I can write and rehearse and record music anywhere. Technology makes it easy to do that now. And I can easily jump on a plane to perform somewhere when I need to.’

  ‘You’d really do that to be with me?’

  ‘Like a shot.’ He stroked his thumb against her cheek and she felt the affection in it right down to her toes. ‘If you want I’ll move to New York. Whatever it takes to be with you.’

  Heart racing with excitement, she gave him a wide, tearful smile. ‘Actually, I came over here to tell you I’ve decided I’m going to set up my own business. Probably here in Bath to begin with. So I’m going to hand in my notice at my job in New York.’

  He matched her smile with one of his own. ‘Well, that’s perfect, because I’m going to need someone to take care of my brand. Someone who really understands me.’

  She blinked at him. ‘You mean me?’

  He shrugged. ‘Sure, why not? I can’t think of anyone whose hands I’d be safer in. I know you’d do everything in your power to make sure everything is perfect.’

  �
�So what you’re saying is that my perfectionist tendencies might actually be quite useful?’ she teased, with tears pooling in her eyes.

  ‘Yes, in this case, they really will be.’

  ‘Well, it’s nice to hear you finally admit it,’ she said, grinning like a fool.

  ‘Hmm,’ he growled, pulling her in for a kiss and not letting her go until she was breathless and dizzy from it.

  ‘You really love me?’ she asked, not wanting to believe it until he’d confirmed it for her.

  ‘Yes. I love you,’ he said forcefully. ‘You’ve brought me back from the darkest place I’ve ever known and made me want to live again. Really live.’

  ‘Me too,’ she whispered, her throat clogged with tears. She really meant it too. She’d been at her lowest ebb when she’d first met him, but now she could see a bright and shiny future ahead.

  With him.

  The man who had showed her that life was really worth living and that she deserved to be put first.

  The man she loved and who loved her back.

  EPILOGUE

  One year later

  THEY SAT IN front of a roaring fire with the Christmas lights twinkling on the large Douglas fir in the corner of the room and opened the presents they’d bought for each other: her and Alex, her mother and father, and Violet and Evan, plus the good-sized bump in Violet’s stomach.

  Diana lifted up the framed photo of Flora and Alex that they’d given her, which showed the two of them with their arms slung around each other and broad smiles on their faces, standing in front of the new sign to Flora’s marketing business in Bath, and gave a squeal of delight.

  ‘I’m so proud of you, my clever girl,’ she said with real happiness in her voice. ‘This will be given pride of place on top of the piano,’ she added, already getting up to place it there reverently.

  ‘This is for the both of you,’ Alex said, handing the present he’d brought for Flora’s parents over to her father.

  Francis opened it and lifted it up to show his wife with a look of pleasure on his face. ‘Look, Diana, a signed copy of our daughter’s famous boyfriend’s chart-topping album,’ he said with a grin.