When You're With Me

by Wendi Zwaduk

  Crimson streaked across her face, from her hairline to her chin. “Maybe.”

  “Why wasn’t I supposed to see that? What are you trying to hide?”

  She stared at her hands. “Nothing.”

  He dipped his head to meet her gaze. “Your artwork has a little bit of heart in each line. You can’t hide that. When I look at that image, I see more than just me. I see the vulnerability of a woman who knows what she wants and can’t have it. Few artists can achieve that much emotion in one piece, let alone every creation.”

  Her smile wobbled. “You really worked hard on that delivery, didn’t you?”

  Ramon chuckled. “Did it work?”

  Jude toyed with the strings on his sweatshirt. “A little.”

  He pressed a kiss to the corner of her mouth. “Good, because I need all the help I can get. I’m sorry I got so…me on you. I’m trying to protect you the only way I know how.”

  “I appreciate it, even if I’m a brat.” Her shaky breath warmed his skin to fever. He slid his hand down her arm to twine their fingers as she rested her head on his shoulder. “Make love to me where no one can see. No cameras, no voyeurs.”

  Ramon eased down onto the drawing horse and pulled her onto his lap, facing him. He tucked a loose lock of her hair behind her ear. Every time he thought he had her pegged, she knocked him for a loop. “I’d love to do whatever you want.”

  “But you won’t.” Her gaze fell to her hands.

  “Sweet girl.” He rubbed his forehead against hers, forcing her gaze to his. “This is your special place. I don’t want you to do something you’ll regret.”

  Jude worked open the fly on his jeans and caressed his cock. “I’ve got condoms in my bag. Just bought them.”

  He shivered and cupped her jaw. “From…?” How the hell was he thinking straight when she was massaging his cock? His eyelids drooped.

  “The student centre. Crazy the things they sell there.” Jude eased her skirt up, revealing a silky black thong. “I live to surprise you.” Her eyes glittered as she tore open the packet then rolled the condom down his shaft. She pulled the tiny lingerie to the side and lowered herself onto his dick. “This is where we belong—in each other’s arms.”

  Truer words were never spoken. He surged up into her slick heat and nuzzled her neck, groaning. “Mine.” Instead of thrusting, he remained nestled within her. Nothing mattered except loving her.

  “Ramon…”

  The sound of his name on her lips brought him down a bit from his high. Ramon threaded his fingers in her hair, pulling her in for a kiss. “I’m going to blow in a second.”

  “Then do it,” she said with a grin.

  Ramon slapped her ass and surged into her body. His breathing quickened and a bead of sweat slid between his shoulder blades. Fuck, three thrusts and he’d be done.

  She squeezed him with her inner muscles.

  “Fuck,” he murmured and emptied his seed into the condom.

  Jude snuggled into his arms and shivered. “Quick, but worth it.”

  He stroked her back. Walking away from her would be the hardest thing he’d ever have to do… “I need to get you home to change for work.”

  Jude sat up straight and brushed her hair from her eyes. “I saw it. Them.”

  “Who?” Ramon cupped her cheek. She couldn’t be talking about… “What did you see, babe?”

  “Slade and Astra.” She stared at her hands. “I don’t know who killed them, but I saw her hand and his shoe.”

  “Where?”

  Instead of answering right away, she picked at her ring. Her voice wavered and her body trembled. “I wanted to tell you here where I could trust you and no one would hear.”

  Ramon crushed her in his grasp. The terror radiating in her being consumed him as well. “Tell me when you’re ready. I promise. I won’t let anyone hurt you.”

  “I don’t know who did it, but they were in the compactor. No one knows I saw. I emptied the waste cans backstage and they were there.” She stared him straight in the eye and tears shimmered on her cheeks. “She was my friend.”

  Her revelation changed the game. They’d suspected the compactor, but without someone inside he couldn’t check. If Tiny or Corey, the baboon, found out she knew… Fuck.

  “You won’t tell. Promise me.” Her voice rose three octaves. “Please. I can’t quit, but I can’t keep that secret anymore. It gives me nightmares.”

  “Your secret’s safe with me, babe.” He stroked her hair. No more games with the asshole. Ramon rapidly worked through the scenarios. If he told her his true identity, he risked the wrath of Tiny when he found out. The drug lord wasn’t above killing one cop—another cop would be nothing to him. Hurting Jude would just be collateral damage to Tiny. And she mattered too much to him to take the chance. “Let’s go home. We’ll come up with something to get rid of the darkness.” I have no other choice.

  * * * *

  Jude woke the next morning with a start. She gasped for air. The vision of Astra’s hand became crystal clear in her head—dull grey and limp. She could almost hear Astra cry. And…I did nothing. She sat up and grabbed for the sheets, anything to hide from the darkness. The fear from the break-in slammed into her brain, compounding her anxiety.

  She forced her eyes open and stared at her surroundings. Still in the Sanborn in Ramon’s room. His gentle rustling beside her reminded her she wasn’t in any danger. The visions weren’t real any longer. He cared for her and she belonged. “I am safe,” she murmured. “I am safe.”

  “Good morning, sweet girl. You had a nightmare?” Ramon wrapped an arm around her. “You’re shaking.”

  “Good morning, handsome.” Jude rolled over to meet his gaze. Her heart melted. His eyes were still heavy with sleep, but completely focused on her and comforting her. “I did, but it’s all good now. I’ve got to get it out of my head that someone’s going to hurt me and it’s hard, but you’re helping so much more than you know.” She met his mouth with a wet kiss. He tasted like toothpaste. “What’s on the agenda for today? I have an art history class and my last drawing class of the week. Will you be my chauffeur?”

  Ramon’s laugh wasn’t his normal hearty chuckle. Confusion and something else clouded his eyes. “My plan was to screw you senseless and then whisk you away to meet some of my family before insisting we marry over in Atlantic City… Unless you have a better idea.”

  “I see.” Jude paused to turn his words over in her mind. He was serious about love and marriage, but when would his emotions change? She shoved the thought aside in favour of vanquishing the darkness. She rubbed her bare breasts on his smooth chest in a move she’d learned from watching Andie on stage. Apparently, the writhing worked for Ramon.

  “Come here and let me love you,” he said in a thick, sexy voice. “Babe, you’re beautiful.”

  Jude sucked in a ragged breath. Did this man ever tire? She didn’t care.

  “Come here,” he said again.

  “Not until I can play with you.” She laced her fingers around his morning wood. “You’re way ahead of me. No fair.” Jude licked her lips and shook her head. With the pad of her index finger, she traced the vein running along the underside of his dick. “Very nice.” She bent down and flicked the sensitive tip with her tongue. “You taste sinful.”

  Ramon shivered and groaned once more. His fingers twined in her hair and he groaned. “Babe, come here before I go off too early. Again.”

  Ahh, she was on the right track.

  Clamping her lips around his heated flesh, she pumped up and down. “Ummm.” She took him to the very back of her throat, slowly sucking and teasing around him.

  His hips bucked against her skilled assault. “Yeah.” His response drove her wild. “No more, babe. I want to be inside you,” he rasped.

  Very slowly, Jude ran her tongue along the base of his shaft, before sliding up to align their bodies. Once away, she missed his taste. “Okay, you win. But I get to finish later.”

  He gra
sped her hips and guided their union. “You will.”

  Jude reached down and rubbed his dick along her clit. How the man could easily pleasure her body shocked her. “Not yet. I need to catch up to you,” she gasped.

  Ramon pulled her into his embrace. He licked and sucked on the tender flesh of her neck while teasing her aching nipples. Could sex get better? It seemed so. “Yeah, babe,” he groaned.

  She looked into his eyes. The deep brown faded into black pools filled with passion only for her. “Ramon.” She shivered. “Oh, Ramon!”

  Ramon nodded. “I love it when you say my name like that,” he said and stroked her silky skin. “Ride me, Jude.”

  Huh? She’d seen it in the movies, but to actually do it? Wouldn’t it hurt?

  “I won’t hurt you, Jude—you’re ready,” he said, reading her mind.

  Jude lowered herself onto his erect shaft. Her breasts jiggled with each thrust. “Like this?” Good grief—she sounded green. He must think of her as an inexperienced fool.

  Ramon’s eyes rolled back in his head and he groaned. Jude paused with fear.

  “Babe,” he rasped. “Oh, yeah. Perfect.”

  “Oh, God,” Jude gasped. The shock of sincere pleasure crashed within her body. Sweet Mother, he was good.

  They finished in unison and collapsed together on the bed in a tangled heap.

  Ramon ran his fingers through her hair and rubbed her cheek with his thumb. Even her scalp tingled at his touch.

  “I meant it, you know.”

  Jude snuggled up next to him. He spoke, but she really didn’t catch the words.

  “What?”

  “I planned on moving your things down here this morning, meeting some of my close friends and getting married next weekend. Once the boys meet you, I’m sure they’ll love you.”

  Shocked, Jude looked at him blankly. “Get real,” she said and tried her best to sound bored. In her chest, her heart pounded triple time. She wanted him to be serious. Was he serious? Married? Saddled down? Forever? And what was the deal with his friends?

  “I’m very much for real,” he said. “Ray and Logan are great guys. They’ll want to get to know the woman in my heart.”

  Jude’s jaw dropped and she felt the blood drain from her face. “Wait… I need to get approval from them? Or are you talking about something else? I don’t do free dances and I’m not going to have a ménage to make you look like a badass. Is that what you want?” She wasn’t about to be used by another man. Jude sat up and wrapped the sheet around her body. Her hands trembled.

  Men could be real pigs, but she’d never expected Ramon to be one. Okay, sure he was a bouncer and a little rough around the edges, but to pass her around? Or was she letting her fear run away with her?

  “Slow down, babe.” Ramon placed his hand on her arm, stopping her movements. “Can I explain?”

  She clutched the bedding but peered at him through loose strands of her hair.

  Ramon scooted next to her and smoothed the locks of her hair between his fingers. “I don’t mean a ménage or anything else to make me look cool or badass or whatever. I don’t know if I could share you with anyone and I know I couldn’t handle seeing you with someone else if we split. I only wanted to take you out on a date where my friends hang out. Nothing more.” Ramon cupped her chin. “Let’s start getting your valuables. I don’t want to leave you alone any longer than I have to.”

  Jude knew they were moving too fast, but her heart and her brain refused to apply the brakes. Her guts screamed this was the right thing to do—move in permanently, offer her love and sacrifice her heart. She scrambled from between his legs and pinned his chest under her knees to slow down. Mussed curls hung around her face. “I have my most treasured valuable right here,” she said and jabbed his pecs with her index finger. “But I’d like to move what’s left of my security box and art supplies down here, if that’s your idea.”

  Ramon kneaded her ass in his hands. Jude wondered what he might say next.

  “That was the plan, love. We can shower once we’re done. I love you, Jude.”

  She’d watched his lips form the words and felt his renewed erection warming her backside. Somewhere between the lust and passion was something else, but what? He had to be joking. He’d said he didn’t deal in emotions like love.

  “You do?”

  Surrender and surprise shone in his eyes. “I care about you and I don’t want you working at that shitty club. Please?”

  She shrank away from him. Wanted her to quit? Yeah, sure…and money for tuition would just appear? Come on. “Please don’t. You’re asking things I can’t make happen.”

  “You can do whatever you put your mind to, but I stand behind whatever you want to do.” Ramon slipped out from under her and disappeared into the bathroom, leaving her alone.

  Jude glanced around the room. As much time as she’d spent in his arms and his bed, she really didn’t know him. What made him tick? Why did he want to work at a sleazy nudie bar? With his muscles and commanding tone, he’d make a better cop. She bit down hard on the inside of her cheek and strolled across the room to the window. As she stared out at the city below, she mulled over the past few hours. She’d told him her deepest secret and he’d barely blinked—no, he’d asked her to marry him.

  Part of her wanted to go along with his idea. Being a student full-time sounded heavenly. But what if they didn’t make it? What if he lost interest and found someone new?

  She rested her forehead on the cool glass. One day her world would be less complicated. It had to be. One day.

  * * * *

  Four trips back and forth in the hallway succeeded in moving all of her things save for the mattress and bulky couch. Jude nudged it unsuccessfully with her hip, making Ramon chuckle.

  “Later,” he said and pulled Jude into an embrace. “Right now, I need some Jude love. Lock this door and let’s get into our shower.” He swatted her ass and nearly skipped back to his apartment, caught up in a ‘walking on sunshine’ moment.

  “Where were we?” she asked as he closed the door.

  Ramon turned around but before he could answer, she tugged the sweaty T-shirt over her head, releasing her breasts to the cool air. Her nipples instantly sprang to life, insisting on his immediate attention. “Oh, now I remember. You wanted to have sex.”

  His jaw opened and shut without sound. Hard work turned her on? Who knew? He could definitely get used to this. Her energy would be the death of him and he welcomed the challenge with open arms.

  “I’m sorry,” she said and strutted over to him. Jude clasped her hands behind her back, inching her breasts forward into his chest. Her head tilted back and her eyes flashed. “Did you have something else you wanted to say?”

  Involuntarily, Ramon’s hands groped her naked flesh. “I don’t remember,” he said clumsily and claimed the pale skin of her throat. “Damn, you’re a tease—a sex-kitten, but definitely a tease.” So he was laying it on a bit thick. Who cared?

  Jude groaned and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, digging her nails into his skin. “Oh…”

  “Have I told you lately that you’re beautiful?” Ramon loved to make her squirm with delight. She knew how to tease him and he loved it. “Damn, you’re smokin’, woman.”

  Jude chewed on her kiss-swollen bottom lip and sucked in a ragged breath. “You’re not too bad yourself, Mr Decker.” She arched into him, rubbing her feverish body against his. “Oh,” she sighed. “Yeah.”

  Ramon raked his fingers along her ribcage. She met him touch for touch on a dizzying emotional high. He loved her and her effect on his whole outlook. “Come on,” he coaxed. “I have surprises waiting for you.”

  She followed him into the hot shower. “Lead on and I’ll follow,” she said and kissed his chest. “I’d follow you anywhere.”

  God, please let me be that lucky, he prayed. He’d been too forward, asking her to quit her job, but damn. If she stayed, she’d be in the line of fire. The truth would come out�
��what she knew and had seen. He could lose her. Ramon pushed the thought aside. He made sure to soap and rinse every inch of her body, adding kisses and squeezes whenever possible. After the shower, he followed her naked form into the bedroom.

  “Come away with me tonight.” His chest tightened. “We’ll go on a date.”

  Jude unzipped her portfolio case “Ramon, it’s Sunday night. Where can we go? I have classes in the morning.”

  He dropped to one knee beside her and whispered in her ear. “I’m tired of being watched and I want to get away. I thought we’d visit some of my friends and their band. I’ll fill you in along the way. Are you game?”

  Chapter Eight

  Jude twirled in Ramon’s arms. Going to the Ricochet had been Ramon’s best idea yet. The glittery lights and the stale smoke reminded her of the Silver Steel, but the feeling was totally different. People laughed, drank and cuddled—not a drooling, groping, inebriated man in sight. Being at the Ricochet was like being at a huge barn dance with a couple of hundred friends. She rested her head on his shoulder as Ramon sang along to the band. His throaty rumble made her thighs heat. The last strains of the song reverberated around her chest.

  For the first time in a long time, she felt like a normal woman on a normal date with the man of her dreams, not a stripper with a dead-end bum intent on grabbing her assets.

  “Here they come.” Ramon gave her shoulder a squeeze. “I’d like you to meet a couple of my good friends. If all goes well, we’ll be seeing them a lot more.”

  She tucked in close, suddenly feeling out of place as the two hulking men approached. If they found out what she did for a living, would they want special treatment? A private show? Or would they run away and laugh at the both of them?

  The tall man embellished with tattoos and muscles thrust his hand forward. “My name’s Ray. You saw me on the leads up there. Tell me your favourite song and, if we know it, we’ll play it for you two.” When he shook her hand, his hand literally enveloped hers.