by Zoey Derrick
“Because it’s ridiculous and completely unnecessary for me to have one. No one knows who I am, where I am or that I have anything to do with the band.” I shrug. “Besides, I just needed to get out of there.”
“That bad?” she asks for the second time today.
“No, it’s just,” I sigh, “I made a bad decision last night and I needed to kind of clear my head.”
“Please, don’t tell me you…” I nod my head. “Who?” she asks me in a way that makes her more of a best friend than a boss and I smile with no intention of telling her who. She shakes her head and laughs. “As long as you keep working, I don’t give a rat’s ass what ya do, just don’t let it affect the job you were sent here to do.”
“Food’s here,” Tristan says as he comes out of the other room with Jayden on his hip. I’d have never pegged him to be the daddy type, but he and Jayden are two peas in a freakin’ pod and I love watching the two of them together.
“Great, I’m starving.” Cami walks over and Jayden jumps in Tristan’s arms. Cami takes him and tosses him into the air and he laughs. “You hungry, big man?” She sets him down and he grabs hold of her pant leg. He’s still pretty unsteady on his feet, but he’s figuring out this whole walking thing. He can manage a few steps on his own before he gives up and starts to crawl.
“Come here, Jayden,” I coo and bend down, hoping he will find the courage to take some more steps on his own. He smiles at me, but doesn’t seem sure.
“Go get her,” Cami says and Jayden looks from her to me.
“Come on, big man. You can do it,” I encourage and he steadies himself. I watch as he eventually lets go of Cami’s pants and takes a step. The shock registers on his face when he realizes he’s standing up. “Come here,” I say again and he giggles as he takes one step, then another. Then as I suspected, he plops down on his butt and immediately crawls over to me. “Good job.” I pick him up and settle him on my hip.
We have our own little private conversation while Tristan and Cami set the table in their suite. Once they’re done, Tristan comes over and takes Jayden from me. “You all right, kid?” he asks me.
I shrug. “Yeah, I think so.”
Tristan smiles, “Whoever it was, don’t let them bring you down. We Hollywood types are jerks, but eventually we either come around or we don’t and we let you know.” He winks at me.
“Not all of Hollywood are jerks,” I tease him. “You turned out all right.”
He snorts a laugh. “But look at what I had to go through to get there.”
I shake my head. “You’ve always been humble. Sure, you’ve had your demons to deal with, but look at you now.” I smile at Jayden and Tristan lights up.
“Come on, let’s eat,” Cami says.
I join them for dinner. We talk shop, but when she finally gets around to asking the dreaded question, my blood runs cold. “So, what do you think about going on tour?”
“I think it’s an opportunity I’d be stupid to pass up,” I say softly.
“But it’s an opportunity that will come again. This isn’t the only time I see you going on the road. At least, not if Addison agrees. You guys seem to be getting along pretty good.”
I smile. “For what little we’ve interacted, I think we do. But with what happened with Kyle being gone. Jeez Cami, I felt so bad for her.”
I watch as sadness creeps into Tristan’s features. I remember a time not so long ago when Cami had bailed on him and I remember what that was like too. It was awful. “She’s been a mess from what I understand,” Cami says softly.
I nod. “I’ve only seen her a handful of times and that was usually just to check on her while Talon was at the studio.” The comment allows me to turn things onto a new subject. Things between Cami and Tristan are amazing now, but I know that time still haunts them both. “Speaking of the studio…”
“Oh, yes, it’s rescheduled for Saturday morning. They’re not going to fine us because of the circumstances behind what happened, considering it was Addison they were recording. If it had been Talon or someone else, they wouldn’t have made the exception. They’re opening the studio specifically for them. I emailed you the details from the plane.”
“Sorry, I haven’t checked my email.”
“No worries,” she smiles. “So, what have you decided?” she asks as she takes a bite.
“I’ll go.”
“Good.”
“What about the office?”
She sighs, “We’ll get there, it’s just going to take some time. I never realized how much you did and how efficient you were at it until you were gone.”
Tristan snorts a laugh. “Don’t let her fool you, she’s been a wreck.”
“Tristan,” she scolds and laughs. She looks at me, and I know I have concern in my eyes. “Don’t you worry about it. I just see now why my father hired you and I see now why you will be missed around there. As long as this remains something you want to do, you’ll continue to do it. I doubt I will find a replacement anywhere near as good as you, but eventually, I won’t need you anymore.” She winks at me and we finish our meal.
When we’re done, I leave them to their evening. If there is one thing that Cami is known for, it’s being there for her family at night, regardless of what’s going on or if she ends up back at the office after Jayden has gone to bed. I’ve always admired her for that, considering her father wasn’t as available when she was growing up.
I take a cab back to the hotel and when I enter the lobby, I detour into the bar. I have no desire to go back upstairs, at least not right now. Considering that it’s Wednesday, it’s pretty crowded in here. It isn’t until I see the couches occupied, not by band members, but by other patrons that I realize that maybe I should have gone to the rooftop bar instead. I quickly scan the room and there is no sign of 69 Bottles anywhere. Thank god.
I grab a seat at the bar, facing the entrance from the lobby, hoping to not be caught unaware and giving me an escape through the outside entrance to the bar if I need one. I have no intention of sticking around if they show up. I refuse to watch Dex work some other woman over.
Agreeing to go on tour is going to be fraught with more heartache than I can bear. This is confirmed for me when I see Mouse enter the bar with a woman, Peacock enter with a woman and finally bringing up the rear, Dex. But he is alone.
I try to slink out and away, but it isn’t long before he catches me and looks me square in the eyes. I fight the urge to smile over him being alone. I wonder if he struck out, or if his lack of companion is by choice. I shake my head. I shouldn’t be making assumptions, but the fact that Mouse and Peacock each seem to have someone on their arms and Dex is alone sends a thrill through me. But then again, she could be in the restroom for all I know.
Just a few minutes ago, the couches they’d been using all week emptied, giving them their spot to sit. They do and the waitress I’d paid to pour Crown all over Dex’s head is there to greet them. That’s when a leggy, tall, narrow waist brunette walks into the bar. She goes straight for the couches where Dex and the guys are sitting and she sits down right next to Dex whose arm is sprawled over the back of the couch. The waitress leans over, giving me a view of her ass and Dex a shot right down her low cut shirt.
I knew it was too good to be true. I see the chance to make my escape since I know he can’t see me and I know the other guys don’t know I’m here. I’d thought that I would just walk around the building and into the lobby, sneak onto the elevator and finally up to the safety of my room, but instead of turning right, I turn left and walk right in to Times Square. The lights are bright, the signs are dancing and I just stand there, soaking it all up.
I’m not even gone for ten minutes when my cell phone rings in my back pocket. Pulling it free, I see that it’s Casey. I press the button, just once so that it rings on his end and silences on mine. When the call is done, I put it back in my pocket and start walking.
There are several people milling about outside when I come up on t
he first theater. It must be intermission. I walk through the cloud of smoke and politely excuse myself when I almost run into someone. I just keep walking, letting the anger and frustration well inside me. I have absolutely no one to blame for this but myself. I gave in. I told myself that I could do it and I knew damn well that I couldn’t. But seeing what I saw tonight is going to give me the fuel I need to move past it. To move on from it. It only takes me a few more steps before I realize that I’m crying. Before I realize that the idea of giving up on him, giving up on the idea of him, hurts more than what he just did, again.
When I come to a street that I can’t cross yet, I pull out my phone to see if Casey left me a voicemail. “What the fuck?”
I have eight missed calls. It’s only been five fucking minutes. There are no voicemails. Five calls are from Casey, one is from Troy, one from Tori - who is supposed to be sleeping- and the last call, less than a minute ago is from Mills. “Shit,” I sputter just as my phone starts to ring again.
“Hello?” I say tentatively into the phone.
“Where the hell are you?”
“Dex?”
“Answer me,” he says, his voice is harsh and commanding.
“Fuck off,” I snap and hang up. That felt pretty good actually.
My phone starts to vibrate in my hands once again and this time, it’s Mills and I know it will really be him since he’s at the hospital and not with the guys.
“Hello?”
“Raine, are you all right?”
“Perfectly fine. Is there a problem?”
“I just got a call saying you’d walked back out of the hotel and that no one could find you.”
“Oh, I just went up to the rooftop,” I lie.
“So you’re fine?”
“Perfectly fine.”
“Okay, thanks for taking my call.”
“Anytime.” I smirk and hang up. Fuckers.
I don’t wander far, just around Times Square. Popping in and out of some of the shops, people watching. Despite the cold night, the Naked Cowboy is playing on the streets, naked as ever. You know he’s not really naked, right? So disappointing.
I finally head back toward the hotel with the theater crowd as the shows close up for the night. Though this is the city that never sleeps, the streets become quieter after the shows are done. At least at first glance. During the summer months the sidewalks are narrowed by delis and restaurants that offer outside seating and window walls move, opening up the bars to the elements. I pass by a couple and debate on going inside but I decide against it. It’s approaching midnight and I have to be up early in the morning. Cami is meeting me at the hospital before talking to Addison. I get the impression that it’s going to be a very long day.
I go through the main entrance of the hotel, not wanting to see Dex with his groupie or the rest of the guys, but I can’t stop my eyes from looking in that direction when I walk past the bar and immediately I wish I hadn’t. Mouse and Peacock are still there with their girls. Dex, of course, is gone, so is the girl he was sitting with. Assholian.
As I ride the elevator up to the seventeenth floor, I realize just how exhausted I am. When the doors open, I am greeted by Tori, Rusty, Beck and lastly, Dex. They all just stare at me. “Hello gentlemen, Tori,” I say and step off of the elevator. I feel daggers being shot at me. “What?” I say exasperated.
“You lied to Mills?” Beck says.
“About what?”
“Where you were,” he retorts, his tone is clipped.
“Not at the time I talked to him.” Okay, I did, but that’s moot.
“Where did you go?” Dex asks.
“I don’t really think that’s any of your business,” I snap.
“It might not be his, but it is ours,” Beck says.
I roll my eyes. “Look, I’m fine, all in one piece. See.” I lift my arms and turn around. “Now if you’ll excuse me.” I try and sidestep Beck, who doesn’t move for a minute before eventually moving aside.
I don’t expect the next wall as I collide with Dex, who grabs me at my elbows and on instinct, or maybe because I’m just that pissed at him, my knee flies up, nailing him square in the balls.
“Oomph,” he groans and doubles over.
“Oh shit,” Myself and three other people say. “Stay away from my elbows,” I snap and walk around him, fighting the urge to laugh at Dex’s shocked expression and pain. He’s turning red as a fucking cherry and…
“I warned you, dumb ass,” I hear Beck say.
“Fuck. Off,” Dex growls. “Fuck, this hurts.”
That’s when I hear the roar of laughter and I can’t help but join in. I should feel bad, but I don’t.
Fuck, this shit hurts like a bitch. “What the fuck did I do?” I ask out loud but I don’t expect an honest response. Though when Tori hunches down next to my head, I have a feeling I’m going to get one.
“Stay away from her elbows,” she says pointedly.
“No shit, Sherlock, but what the fuck else was I supposed to do, she was gonna fall.” I blink a few times, the pain is starting to subside, but it’s going to hurt tomorrow.
She just shrugs and then holds out her hand to help me up. “Maybe get out of her way next time.”
“I wanted answers,” I grumble as I get up. New pains shoot through me but I crack my neck in an attempt to get rid of the aches elsewhere. It doesn’t work. “Fuck,” I groan. It’s been ten years since I’ve been kneed in the fucking junk and of all the people to do it to me, it had to be her and it had to be here.
“Answers to what? Where she was?” Tori asks me.
“Yeah.”
“Why do you care?” she replies.
She has a fucking point and I hate her for it. “I don’t fucking know.” I start to limp my way to my room but when I reach the door, I straighten slightly and change my course.
“What are you going to do about her?” Beck asks from behind me and I know he’s not talking about Raine.
“Get rid of her. Or do her yourself,” I groan and start walking toward Raine’s room.
“Oh no you don’t, slick.” Rusty steps in front of me. “She doesn’t need you knocking down her door.”
“Seriously? Move.”
“Nope. Come on, Beck will dump the chick in your room. You can come to mine if you want while he does. But leave Raine alone.”
“I want an apology,” I state.
There are a few snorts from behind me. “I don’t think you’re going to get one.
“Can I at least make her kiss it and make it better?” I smirk and Rusty rolls his eyes at me. “What? Can’t fault a man for trying. All right, lead on.” I make a half-ass attempt to point toward his door. I have an ulterior motive for agreeing to go to his room. I have to walk right past Raine’s.
No matter, I follow Rusty dutifully until I get to her door and before he or anyone else can stop me, I pound on the door.
“Go away, Dex,” she shouts from the other side. “I’m not apologizing.”
I pound on the door again. “Open it up.”
“For-get-it.” This time she’s standing at the door.
“Come on, please?” I whine.
“Dude, drop it. Don’t keep pushing or you’re going to be in a world of hurt,” Rusty whispers.
“Come on, Rusty is here. Please open the door,” I plead at the door and bump my head against it.
I know I’m winning when I hear the creak of her chain and it doesn’t bump against the door. I smile, probably a little too sadistically. Then comes the deadbolt. She’s a smart girl. We have keys.
Finally the door handle clicks as she turns it, opening it up. She’s standing there, one arm on the frame, one on the door, not defensive in the least. She’s changed into pajama pants and a t-shirt and she fucking looks sexy as hell. “You look like shit,” she snarks.
“He he he. Thanks so much.”
“Have a good evening?” The sarcasm dripping from her voice is evident.
“I was
, until about twenty minutes ago when my nuts got a nice introduction to your knee, thank you very much.”
She stands up a little straighter. “You’re welcome.”
That’s when I go for it. I grab both her arms and bring them up over her head and I push her into the wall just inside her door. My cock hardens and I fight the urge to let it show on my face as I press my body against hers. “Tell me you’re sorry,” I whisper sweetly.
“Never.”
I slant my lips over hers and she groans, melting into me and me into her. I can hear Rusty getting huffy, but she’s not fighting me so he won’t stop me.
“Apologize,” I breathe against her lips.
“You wish.” I press into her a little harder, making sure she feels my erection and my body pinning her down. She moans and I slide my tongue along hers.
“Tell me you’re sorry.”
“You can’t seduce an apology out of me.” She nips at my chin.
‘No, but I’m sure I can fuck one out of you.”
“It still works?” She snorts a laugh and I press into her hands harder, adjusting them so that I can hold her with one hand as the door clicks closed.
“Oh, it works all right, sweetheart. It will work just fine,” I growl as I gently wrap my hand around her neck, then slide it up and into her hair. She moans and I take her mouth, sliding my tongue along hers. Taking her, possessing her. She spreads her legs a little wider and I slide mine between hers. I can feel her rubbing against me, seeking, demanding relief. She moans again. I can barely breathe. Her body is flush against mine, and it’s stealing any resolve I may have had to coax an apology from her. “Tell me you’re sorry,” I whisper.
“I will never apologize for defending myself.” Her breathing is ragged and it takes longer for her to say the words.
“I would never hurt you.” I release her hair and gently trail a finger down her cheek.
“It was a knee jerk reaction,” she snickers.
I smile. “I know. But I’d still like to hear you say I’m sorry.”
“Not going to happen. No matter what you do to me.” She nips again at my chin and then she licks at the stubble of my half-ass beard with the tip of her tongue.
