One corner of his mouth turned up. “Yeah. I kind of figured that.”
Then he was gone. And, God help her, she missed him. The him who was sweet and kind. And the one who was confrontational and angry. She missed all of him, even though she had a hunch this was the calm before the storm. Her life felt like a dresser drawer pulled out and dumped on the floor. If anyone knew how she felt it was Luke. He’d gotten the double whammy. And they hadn’t settled anything. But he was coming back with peanut butter. How sweet was that?
There was no question in her mind. Life as she’d known it was about to change.
Chapter Seven
Madison put her key in her front door, then let out a startled squeal as a dark figure materialized from the shadows on her porch.
“Luke!” She pressed a hand to her chest, as if that would control her pounding heart. “What are you doing here?”
“It’s late, Maddie,” he said, ignoring her question. “Keeping hours like this can’t be good for the baby.”
“Neither is scaring the life out of the baby’s mother. What are you doing here?” she asked again.
A rhetorical question, she realized. She knew why he was there. Several days had passed since he’d found out she was pregnant. Several days during which it hadn’t been far from her mind that he’d served her a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and a glass of milk on a tray while she’d rested in the bed where they’d conceived their baby. He’d stayed with her to make sure she consumed every last crumb of food and drop of milk, then had told her to get some sleep. They could talk the following day.
He rested a hand on the door frame and looked down at her. “I’ve tried to reach you for three days. I’ve left messages everywhere. The evidence would suggest you’re avoiding me. Why?”
“I had a doctor’s appointment. Prenatal bloodwork,” she said, extending her arm so he could see the gauze and Band-Aid on the inside of her elbow.
Her action had nothing to do with proving to him that she was telling him the truth. It was all about keeping him from noticing that she’d deflected the other part of his question which was why she’d been avoiding him. She should have known a man of action like Luke would just show up on her doorstep.
He took her forearm in his large hand as he inspected her wound. Too late she realized her error in judgment to let him see, but she hadn’t figured on his touch. With his index finger, he stroked the tender, sensitive flesh of her inner wrist. Tingles raced over her skin, up her arm, settling in her breasts. This was why she’d been avoiding him. He did things to her, inside and out, that scared her. Her feelings were new, strange, and so big they frightened her.
He didn’t have much respect for her; he’d made that abundantly clear. How could anything lasting and satisfying grow out of that? It would be stupid to hope for anything, even if she wanted it. And instinctively she knew that he could hurt her as no one else ever had—or ever could.
“You should have told me about the appointment,” he gently scolded in a deep, seductive voice that raised gooseflesh on her arms and kicked up her breathing. “I needed to be there,” he said.
She pulled her hand away from his touch. “Why? No one needs to document your weight, do your bloodwork, or take your blood pressure. Although, judging by the look on your face, a date with the blood-pressure cuff isn’t such a bad idea.”
“Can you blame me? This baby is mine, too. I want to know everything that’s going on.”
“So you’ve changed your mind about wanting kids?” she asked, challenging him.
Madison hadn’t realized how important his answer would be until she’d asked the question. When she’d reminded him, he hadn’t denied the truth of his comment about not wanting children. He’d only made excuses for saying it. She would never have chosen these circumstances for bringing a child into the world. In fact, based on her own less-than-ideal childhood, she would never have made the choice to conceive. If children learned what they lived, she’d learned to be distant and uninvolved. She’d had no role model for being Mother Earth incarnate. But now that she was facing the possibility, she found she very much wanted this baby. Did Luke? She planned to love this child with every ounce of her being. Could Luke?
In hindsight she realized another reason she’d put off telling him about the baby was because she couldn’t bear to hear that he didn’t want it.
He ran a hand through his hair, then crossed his arms over his chest. “It’s my right to be involved in the decisions regarding this child,” was all he said.
“I see,” she answered. But it felt like a giant fist was squeezing the life from her heart. That wasn’t at all what she’d hoped to hear.
She opened her door, reaching in to flip two switches, one for the porch light, the other to illuminate the living room of her condo. Then she met Luke’s gaze and heaved a tired sigh. The memory of him carrying her to the bedroom the last time he’d been here flashed through her mind. On the heels of that recollection was a burst of warmth and tenderness for this man.
But his answer didn’t reassure her that he’d changed his mind about wanting children.
She stood in the doorway. In spite of herself, her heart went out to him, the dark confusion in his eyes, the frown on his face. “I’ll raise this baby on my own and let you know if anything comes up that we need to discuss. Good night.” She started to close the door.
He put his palm on it, effectively stopping her. “Not so fast. Based on your behavior patterns, why should I believe you’ll keep me informed?”
She put her hand on her hip, and met his gaze. “And what behavior pattern would that be?”
“The one where you hold back important information that I’m entitled to have.”
“How quickly they forget,” she mumbled. “Whatever happened to ‘innocent until proven guilty’? You accused me of lying about your father, and found out you were wrong. And technically I didn’t hold back information about the baby. You found out from someone else before I had a chance to tell you.”
“You had numerous opportunities and chose not to tell me. I’ll never know for sure whether or not you planned to inform me that I’m going to be a father.”
“And I have no way of proving that I was waiting for the right time. Take it from an attorney, conspiracy is one of the toughest things to prove in court.” She stared at him, wanting to clobber him and kiss him and cuddle into his warm strength all at the same time. “So where does that leave us?”
“It leaves us at a place where I think we should get married.”
“Married?” She blinked and studied his features. There wasn’t a hint of a smile. No mischievous twinkle in his eyes. No cute, quirky curling of his mouth indicating that he was kidding. No flash of dimples. And how she wished there was all of the above. “You’re not serious.”
“I’ve never been more serious about anything in my life,” he replied.
Luke realized it was true. He hadn’t planned to blurt out a proposal that way. But now that he had, he knew it was the right thing to do. He’d spent the better part of his adult life looking for Ms. Right without success. He wanted to do what his brothers and sister had: settle down with one person. But he hadn’t met the woman who rang his chimes, set off the bells and whistles, made him see fireworks. He had reached the point where he believed it was time to settle—period—for whatever woman seemed to meet most of his criteria.
Then he’d kissed Maddie. The fire she’d kindled in him incinerated any imagined list of qualifications. Then came an even bigger shock. She’d been a virgin. She’d let him be her first. He’d begun to hope she was the one. It had thrown him for a loop when he’d found out, first, that he couldn’t trust his parents, then that he couldn’t believe in her. In spite of that, he couldn’t seem to control his attraction for her. He thought about her all hours of the day and night. He wanted to be with her, even though he knew sooner or later this need for her would fade.
Math had taught him the accuracy of pattern. Ty
pically he felt instant fascination for a woman that fairly quickly died out. For reasons he couldn’t explain, Maddie’s appeal had grown over time. It was even stronger now. But based on his past history, it would disappear. He’d been prepared to settle for someone. Why not with the woman who was carrying his child?
“I think you’d better come inside,” she said with a sigh. Standing back, she opened the door wider. “We seem to have established a bad habit of discussing monumental occurrences on my doorstep.”
“Okay.” He suppressed a smile. How did she do that? His whole life was in the dumper and she could make him want to grin.
He walked past her, inhaling the sweet, flowery scent of her perfume. If he lost his sight tomorrow, he knew he could find his way to Maddie by the fragrance that was hers alone. It burrowed inside him and imprinted on his mind.
She set her briefcase down by the beige love seat. Unlike his place, her living room was completely furnished. Floral throw pillows in green, beige and peach floral fabric that matched the chair and ottoman rested on the couch. Mahogany coffee and end tables and various knickknacks completed the cozy conversation area.
“Have you eaten dinner?” she asked.
He shook his head. “More important—have you?”
“I was about to fix a peanut butter sandwich,” she answered. “It seems to be the magic recipe. Would you like one?”
He couldn’t hold back the grin any longer. “Sure.”
She kicked off her high heels, and in stocking feet walked to the kitchen. Barefoot and pregnant. In a calf-length, tailored linen dress, she almost looked like she was playing dress-up with her mother’s clothes. She looked so small, so fragile. She made him want to protect her, take care of her. And need her? No. He couldn’t get their one night of unbridled passion out of his mind. It was probably the best night of his life. But need her? No way. He would never need her or anyone else again.
Pulling bread, peanut butter and jelly and paper plates from the cupboards, she started fixing sandwiches. Then she garnished each with pieces of apple and raw carrots.
She set the plates on the kitchen table and poured two glasses of milk. “Voilà. A well-balanced meal.”
“What if I said it wasn’t hot?”
“I’d call you names like fussy, hoity-toity, snob, then I’d toast yours,” she said, sitting down with a sigh.
He sat down at a right angle to her and took a bite of half his sandwich. He liked that she’d cut them in triangles. His mother had always done that. But he didn’t want to remember that time of absolute faith and innocence when he’d trusted without question. Instead, he turned his thoughts back to Maddie—and his marriage proposal.
“So what do you think?” he asked. “About getting married.”
“Why should we?”
There was the sixty-four-thousand-dollar question. It was fairly complicated. Because Maddie was glib and quick-witted, he decided to keep his answer simple and unimpeachable. “Because it would be best for the baby.”
She chewed thoughtfully, giving no clue about what she was thinking. “You know, it’s been a long time since prospective parents who weren’t married felt any obligation to get married merely for the sake of the unborn child.”
“Is that a yes or no?” he asked.
“Neither. It’s a statement of fact.”
“Is there a yes or no anywhere in my immediate future?” he asked.
“No.”
“No you don’t have an answer? Or no on getting married?”
“No on marriage,” she said. “Although it’s very noble of you to ask.”
Semi-stunned, he waited for her to elaborate. When she didn’t, he said, “Do you want to tell me why?”
“It’s a new millennium. Women are no longer obligated to marry just because they’re having a baby without benefit of marriage.”
“What about your position at the law firm? Won’t this affect your run on a partnership? You’ve been spouting legalese to me for weeks. As far as impropriety goes, this is right up there.”
“Not anymore. Women are single-parenting all the time in this day and age,” she said. “And in the firm, precedent has already been set. One of the senior partners is a woman who also happens to be a single mother and never married her baby’s father. This decision won’t affect my upward mobility. I can still make partner faster than anyone has. My clients don’t care about my situation. Their only concern is the best possible legal counsel. I can give them that. Thank you for your offer, but I have to respectfully decline.”
“But marriage is the next logical step,” he countered.
At least to him it was. She’d hesitated to tell him about the baby because of his remark about not wanting kids. And he’d told her he wanted to be in on the decisions. That didn’t scratch the surface of how he felt about becoming a father. But right now, all he knew for sure was that he didn’t want his child to ever wonder about who his father was and where he fit.
“Marriage is the only way to ensure that I will be involved in my child’s life.”
“Marriage doesn’t guarantee anything. Believe me, as a lawyer, I know. But I would never deprive you of your child. You’re going to have to take my word for that.”
“All evidence to the contrary,” he countered.
“I have never lied to you.” Her green eyes flashed annoyance. “How long are you going to punish me for waiting to give you more news that would rock your world? How long am I going to pay for being sensitive to what you were going through?”
“I’m not punishing you. Just being practical.”
“For the last time, I’ll admit it was wrong to wait. I will regret for the rest of my life that you found out the news from someone else. In my own defense, my heart was in the right place. I held back for the right reason.”
“Getting married for the baby is the right reason.”
She shook her head. “Arguably, it’s the right thing. But it is motivated by the wrong reason.”
“Is it because I’m not a Marchetti?”
He’d asked her once before if she refused to handle his legal affairs because he wasn’t a Marchetti, and she’d denied it, then called him exasperating. But he also knew how much she liked the big Marchetti family. She’d once told him that was something she’d never had. Now that he was no longer one of them, maybe that was why she wanted nothing to do with him.
She cocked her head to the side and studied him. “It’s comforting to know that some things don’t change. You’re still exasperating. But here’s the bottom line—I won’t marry a man who’s made it clear that he doesn’t trust me. Without that, there can’t be love, which is the only right reason to get married.”
He didn’t believe in love. In all these years, it hadn’t happened to him, and he had no reason to think that would change. But her refusal rankled. Getting married was right—for the baby, he added to himself. “Is that your final answer?”
“Yes.”
If he’d never discovered his parent’s lie, he would never have questioned her timing in telling him about the pregnancy. He knew he should let it go and give her the benefit of the doubt. But he couldn’t seem to. He hated that the two people who had been his foundation, were now responsible for his doubts. He hated that he’d been made a fool of—twice.
He studied Maddie. How could she so calmly turn him down and finish her milk? When she set the glass beside her empty paper plate, he wanted to kiss the white mustache from her upper lip. When she licked it off herself, he went hot and hard. He wanted her—here and now. How could his feelings for this woman swing so drastically from one end of the spectrum to the other?
Why?
She’d refused to marry him. Still he wanted her. In spite of everything. He had a bad feeling that the same woman he couldn’t trust was the one he wouldn’t be able to forget. The whole thing confused the hell out of him, so he decided to put it out of his mind. Instead he focused on a more immediate problem.
Since she
wouldn’t marry him, how was he going to watch over her and the baby?
It was almost eight o’clock in the evening when Madison lugged the first of several bags of groceries into her kitchen through the door to her garage. The doctor had stressed the importance of a well-balanced diet to nourish the baby. However, keeping fresh fruits, vegetables, protein and dairy on hand was going to consume a good portion of her time at the grocery store. Between her job and the pro bono work she was doing for the women’s shelter, she didn’t have a lot of time to spare. At least it kept her too busy to think about Luke. During the day.
The nights were a different story. When she turned off the light and closed her eyes, his face was there. The mental picture created an almost physical pain inside her. When would she get over this strange urgency to have his arms around her? If she’d never experienced the incredibly wonderful sensation, would her yearning be so fierce? Although they had talked on the phone, she hadn’t seen him in a few weeks. The more time that passed, the bigger the ache.
As perverse as it sounded, she’d sort of hoped he wouldn’t give up on her. And she’d begun to suspect he had. She ignored the tight sensation in her chest at the thought.
As she started back to the garage for another bag, her doorbell rang. Annoyed, she shook her head. “If that’s a salesman, he’s going to rue the day he rang my chimes,” she grumbled as she walked through the living room.
When she answered the door, Luke Marchetti stood there. Definitely not a salesman, unless he was still hawking wedding vows. But once upon a time he’d definitely rung her chimes.
He held up a measuring cup. “Can I borrow some sugar, sugar?”
“Don’t call me sugar,” she said absently.
She blinked several times, wondering if her thoughts had conjured him up. He looked good, leaning against her door frame, decidedly pleased about something. He was wearing worn jeans, a T-shirt that hugged his biceps, and it looked as if he’d been in a hurry when he stuck his bare feet, without socks, into deck shoes. The corners of his mouth turned up, showing off his dynamite dimples to perfection. But it was the look in his eyes that took her breath away. His gaze seemed to drink in the sight of her, as if he might have missed her, as if he wanted to consume her. Suddenly flutters replaced that tight feeling in her chest, and tingles skittered down her arms.
The Last Marchetti Bachelor Page 9
