After I Do
Page 28
5. What do you think Lauren gets out of her relationship with David? Is the fact that he is separated from his wife integral to their dynamic?
6. Did Rachel’s revelation surprise you? Do you have any relationships like hers and Lauren’s in your life—where the similarities are so clear that the differences can be ignored, sometimes to a fault?
7. Discuss the theme of communication within the novel. To what degree do these characters struggle to express themselves, and how do they find alternative ways of doing so when straight dialogue doesn’t suffice?
8. Re-read the conversation that Rachel and Lauren have with their mother about romance and long-term relationships. Do you understand Ms. Spencer’s perspective that “I don’t need a life partner . . . I want love and romance.” Can romance be kept alive by forestalling a greater commitment, or is it “the nature of love,” as Lauren suggests, for relationships to “become more about partnership and less about romance”?
9. Discuss the role that sex plays in Lauren and Ryan’s relationship, and how it relates to the feelings of resentment that she describes. If romance is, in fact, destined to evolve into more of a partnership, what happens to sex in that equation? Is romance required for a mutually fulfilling sexual relationship?
10. Even though Lauren and Ryan don’t have children, the potential demise of their relationship still has collateral damage. Turn to the conversation that Lauren has with her brother about inviting Ryan to his wedding. Do you think Lauren has a right to an opinion here? Do you agree with her statement that “I made him a part of this family . . . and he’s a part of this family on my terms”?
11. Thinking about Ryan, Lauren says: “We have spent enough years together to know how to work in sync, even when we don’t want to.” To what extent is a long-term relationship defined by whether the other person is someone with whom you know how to endure the tough moments of life? Find examples within the novel to support your opinion.
12. Lauren gets relationship advice from a variety of people throughout the novel. Did any of it in particular resonate with you? Pick a favorite line and share why you connected to it with the group.
13. Speaking of advice: the Ask Allie column plays a large role throughout the book. Was Lauren able to take any wisdom from Allie’s old columns that perhaps a closer friend or family member couldn’t have said to her directly? What did you think of her final letter to Lauren?
14. Consider the romantic partnerships that Lauren has to look to as models: her mother and Bill, Charlie and Natalie, Mila and Christina, even her grandmother and deceased grandfather. What does she take away from each of them?
15. Discuss the portrayal of compromise in the novel, and compare how it is depicted in romantic relationships versus within family dynamics. Do you think of compromise differently when it comes to family members, as opposed to romantic partners? Why or why not?
ENHANCE YOUR READING GROUP
Read Taylor Jenkins Reid’s debut novel Forever, Interrupted as a group. How are these love stories different? Having now read two of Reid’s novels, what can you identify as distinct qualities of her writing style?
The emails that Ryan and Lauren write each other but never send prove to be very cathartic to both of them. If you could write to someone you’ve been romantically involved with (in the past or currently), knowing that they might read it but that they couldn’t confront you about it, what would you say?
The book makes the point that “marriage” is a word that has many different definitions. Whether you are married or unmarried, what does marriage mean to you?
What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever been given about marriage and family?
About the Author
Photograph by Mila Shah
Taylor Jenkins Reid is an author and essayist from Acton, Massachusetts. She graduated from Emerson College with a degree in Media Studies. Her first novel, Forever, Interrupted, was named one of the “11 Debuts We Love” by Kirkus Reviews. She lives in Los Angeles with her husband, Alex, and her dog, Rabbit. You can follow her on Twitter @TJenkinsReid.
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ALSO BY TAYLOR JENKINS REID
Forever, Interrupted
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Washington Square Press
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This book is a work of fiction. Any references to historical events, real people, or real places are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places, and events are products of the author’s imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or places or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
Copyright © 2014 by Taylor Jenkins Reid
All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book or portions thereof in any form whatsoever. For information address Washington Square Press Subsidiary Rights Department, 1230 Avenue of the Americas, New York, NY 10020.
First Washington Square Press trade paperback edition July 2014
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Cover design © Connie Gabbert Design and Illustration LLC
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Reid, Taylor Jenkins.
After I do : a novel / Taylor Jenkins Reid.
pages cm
1. Marriage—Fiction. 2. Separation (Psychology)—Fiction. 3. Self-realization—Fiction. 4. Domestic fiction. 5. Psychological fiction. I. Title.
PS3618.E5478A69 2014
813’.6—dc23
2013046056
ISBN 978-1-4767-1284-0
ISBN 978-1-4767-1285-7 (ebook)