“Chicken Alfredo. Sit down. I’m almost done.”
I tilt my cheek into his lips as he molds to my back, laying his hand over mine with the knife. “Let me serve you.”
“I’m really almost done.”
“Just sit down,” he presses, kissing my shoulder. I do as asked while he loads our plates.
“I talked to my sister about us,” he says, slathering a piece of bread with a thin coating of butter. The mention of her reminds me of my run-in with his brother, which I have forgotten until now.
“What did she say?”
“She’s ecstatic about the proposal, pissed as hell about the wedding.”
“I figured as much,” I say, noticeably uncomfortable as I gear for an unpleasant conversation. “I forgot to tell you…I ran into your brother last night.”
His movements slow while he places my plate in front of me. “My brother?”
“Yes, when I went out with Kevin.”
Clearly ticked off, he takes the seat next to mine. “Did you tell him about us?”
“Of course I did.”
“I’m guessing he didn’t take it well.”
“He acted odd and uncomfortable, strangely enough.”
“It’s not odd he found you marrying someone else displeasing.”
His eyes narrow at my eye roll.
“Well, what did he say?”
“He said congratulations and that we should have a dinner to celebrate with your family, although I’m not really sure if he was being condescending.”
He stands and enters the kitchen, retrieving a wine glass. “Want a glass?”
“No thank you.”
“I’m not subjecting you to that,” he says, lowering back down into his seat.
“Last time wasn’t that bad, Ben.”
“My father insulting you in every way possible wasn’t bad enough?”
“I think we should try it again before we completely write them off forever. I mean, they are your family.”
“And you know how I feel about them.”
“I do. And if you really don’t want to do it, then we don’t have to. But I figured they’d like to find out about us from something other than a TV or newspaper.”
He nods, probably just to placate me.
***
Catapulted out of sleep by a violent twisting of my insides, I scramble out of bed, the way to the bathroom illuminated by the sun that’s still rising outside the windows. My knees buckle, aching from the force of my fall so my face can reach the toilet in time. With only seconds to dread what’s coming, the tightening in my esophagus comes, and I’m vomiting.
The painful heaves last under a minute, having taken all my energy. I lay my hand on my arm, waiting to see if it really is over.
Food poisoning is my initial thought, but since Benjamin is fine, that seems unlikely. My eyes open and close tiredly, my mind trying to shut down, not ready to wake fully. Refusing to fall asleep here, I dig through my unpacked box of toiletries for my toothbrush.
The sight of an unopened box of tampons stuns me, and my digging stops.
The sight of them reminds me of how long it’s been since I used one.
My heart plummets, horror rendering me immobile.
No, it can’t be. It can’t.
“Darcy?”
My husband appears in the doorway, shirtless, right out of sleep.
My voice comes out an octave higher than it should when I answer. “What?”
“You okay?”
I nod, taking my toothbrush from the pile and stuff the box back under the counter. “Yeah, yeah. I’m fine. Had a nightmare.”
He comes up behind me, kisses my hair, and begins stripping out of his clothes for a shower. “Shower with me.”
Panicking more than he could ever know, I inch away from him, forcing a smile. “I have to make a call first.”
I race out of the room, toothbrush still in hand, before he can suspect anything.
My bag nearly falls out of my hands as I fish around for my cell phone. When I do find it, I dial my gynecologist I last saw months ago when prescribing my birth control.
“Dr. Trigiani’s office. How may I help you today?”
“Hi, I know this is last minute, but I was wondering if I could possibly schedule an appointment with the doctor today.”
“She had a cancelation. I could fit you in at noon. Does that work for you?”
I press my hand to my thumping chest. “Yes.”
“Just a check-up visit?”
“Um, yes. A check-up.”
“Absolutely. And your name?”
After giving her everything necessary, I hang up and drop the phone and my bag onto the bed, dizzy from the speed at which my brain is working. It’s not what I think it is…it can’t be.
***
“Darcy.”
I glance up from the newspaper. Benjamin has finished his breakfast and looks as though he’s been watching me for a while.
“What?”
“Are you all right?”
“I’m fine.”
“You sure? You’ve been reading that same paragraph for twenty minutes now.”
I stand up and start clearing the table. “Yeah, I’m just…I have a headache.”
I scrub our plates in the sink, biting on my lip vigorously.
“You look pale, baby.” I feel his hand on my waist and exhale when his other one rests on my forehead. “Maybe you should stay home.”
“No, I can’t delay going back any longer. I have to work.”
“You won’t be any help to them if you can’t focus on more than a paragraph.”
“I’m honestly fine, Benjamin. Stop worrying about me.”
My panic has finally reared its ugly head, making me instantly ashamed.
“If you’d like to talk about it, come to my office.”
I keep a hard gaze on the counter in front of me until the elevator doors close, distancing us entirely.
***
“Darcy?”
I glance up from my computer, finding Danielle in the doorway. Christ, I feel like the last time I talked to her was my birthday dinner years ago.
“Yeah?”
“Wanna get some lunch? A couple of us are going out.”
“I wish I could,” I murmur apologetically. I glance at the clock, realizing I’m running late. “I have a doctor’s appointment in twenty minutes. I’m really sorry we haven’t been able to go out. So much has been happening.”
She smiles kindly. “Yeah, I heard about your wedding. Congratulations.”
“Thank you. Well, how about we raincheck for tomorrow’s lunch? We can get Italian or something?”
“Sure.”
As soon as she leaves, I stand, stuffing my electronics into my bag with trembling fingers.
Sitting in the doctor’s exam room, I realize they still haven’t stopped moving. I settle one hand on the other and clutch my fingers tight, forcing my knuckles white. I’ve had a pap smear, urine test, everything possible to determine what could be happening.
My head shoots up at the sound of the door re-opening. My doctor enters carrying a clipboard with my information…and results.
“Mrs. Scott,” she emphasizes the use of my new last name with excitement, “first off, I’d like to congratulate you on your wedding.”
“Thank you.”
She sits down at her desk with a sigh of finality. “You are pregnant. Your suspicions were correct.”
CHAPTER FIVE
I let out a sound. I have no idea what sound it is. I haven’t made it before.
“A-Are you sure?”
She nods, regarding me closely. “I’m guessing this wasn’t planned.”
“No.” I’m fighting back tears. “No, I just got married. We’ve barely had time to be married.”
“Unfortunately, I do have more news…important news.”
I wait, terrified.
“You are anemic, Darcy. Severely so.”
�
�What does that mean?”
“Your red blood cell counts are diminished. A normal hemoglobin count should be 12 to 16. You are currently at 6.” Her expression tells me I should be worried.
“What does this mean? Can we do something about it?”
“I’m going to be prescribing you iron supplements. You need to eat well and eat things with a high percentage of iron. Lean beef, oysters, chicken, potatoes, beans, leafy vegetables…I need you to understand that we need to get this back up. Your red blood count cells are equally low, and this is extremely dangerous, for you and for this baby.”
“Dangerous?”
“Severe anemia doubles the risk of death in pregnancy, Darcy.” I stare at her, struggling to absorb those words. “I’m telling you this to let you know that this is not something to play around with. Anemia of this magnitude can cause stroke, kidney failure, excessive bleeding after delivery, and that’s not taking your baby into consideration. Unless we can get this blood count to a safer level, your risk of miscarriage is increased considerably.”
I can’t believe this. I hold my head, scared shitless.
“Are you understanding what I’m saying?” She waits for a moment. “Darcy?”
“I-I just…I’m trying to think.” I have a million questions. “How far along am I?”
“Eight weeks. Two months.”
I shake my head. “So this happened right after I got out,” I mumble. “I don’t understand. I’m on birth control. I saw you a few months ago. Was I anemic then?”
“No, which is why I’m stating the importance of iron to you now. Your pregnancy seems to have brought this on. As for birth control, there is always a slim chance of conception or that you engaged in intercourse before the clear period.”
“Okay, so these supplements, they’ll help me? Is there a chance I could get worse? What are the symptoms?”
“I’m putting in now that you need one blood transfusion immediately. I don’t want to do more because I don’t want different people’s blood in you, especially during a pregnancy, but it’s too risky to let you go home like this. I want you to go today, you hear me?”
I nod.
“Have you been tired lately? Overly tired? Maybe dizzy?”
“Yes.”
“I’d suggest taking time off from work if you’re able. Rest is paramount for the health of you and your baby.”
“I just got a promotion a few months ago…I don’t know what to do.”
“If you have to work, you cannot be moving around. Tell your boss that excessive lifting, any particular strain, is dangerous. If you need me to write a note, I will.”
Two months. Two months pregnant.
“I’ve been drinking. I didn’t know. I was drinking a few days ago.”
“That may account for this current result, but I don’t think that’s what’s going on here. We’ll need a few days until your blood tests come through to get a better understanding of what is causing this. I’m prescribing you the supplements and nausea medication because we don’t want to be concerned about vomiting.”
“Is it possible to have anemia and still have a healthy baby?”
“It is possible. All of these measures we’re taking are precautions. Necessary precautions, because even if you weren’t pregnant, this cell count is not normal. If it is an infection or a chronic disease that is causing your cells to lower, then you will be undergoing a high-risk pregnancy. As of now, this is high-risk. I think you’re entitled to know the truth and the risks…as hard as they are to hear.”
I take the papers from her hesitantly and clutch them in my grasp.
“We are going to do this together, Darcy,” she says with a smile. “We will get this handled. You do your part, and I’ll do mine, okay? Having a child is one of the greatest joys in life. I am determined to make sure that happens.”
My world is spinning. Her positivity is lost on me. “Am I good to go?”
“Yes, my assistant will schedule your next appointment, which will be in a few weeks if there are no problems with the test results.”
“Okay, thank you.” I walk for the door, hearing my own labored gasps.
“Call me if you have any questions, any concerns, Darcy. Don’t hesitate.”
I escape into the bland white hallway like my life depends on it.
***
My palm hovers over the sink, a copulation of pills directly in the middle. I’m holding a glass of water with the other, staring into space, trying to recover from whiplash.
Whiplash hearing that Benjamin and I are expecting.
Whiplash hearing that my body is rejecting the pregnancy.
Whiplash hearing that my baby is in danger.
This wasn’t how this was supposed to go. Benjamin and I were supposed to have time, time to come to an understanding. He was supposed to want this.
I stuff the pills into my mouth and swallow them with a gulp of water. My emails are gathering quickly on my computer screen, and the office is bustling outside my door. I’ve been sitting here on company time for more than an hour, unable to move a muscle.
My phone vibrates on my desk, and Benjamin’s name appears, a photo from our wedding taking up the space around his name. I want to cry, but doing so will unravel me, and I need to remain clear. I need to absorb this and act.
Cindy appears at the door. “Darcy, do you have those manuscripts yet?”
Glad I worked late last night, I pull them out of the drawer and hold them out to her.
She tucks them under her arm and turns, then stops in the doorway and turns on her heels. “Are you okay? You’re really pale.”
My mouth won’t open, and I can’t meet her eyes.
“Darcy? Are you okay?”
“No,” I whisper.
“What happened?”
“I’m pregnant.”
Her eyes widening, she shuts the door and approaches my desk. “How far along?”
“Two months.”
“And you’re not happy about this? You’re newly married. It’s soon, yeah, but not unheard of.”
“It’s a high-risk pregnancy.”
She lowers into a seat across from me. “What do you mean?”
“My red blood count is too low. I’m anemic.”
“That’s usually not that bad.”
“It stemmed from the pregnancy, the doctor thinks. She said a normal hemoglobin count is 12 and I’m at a 6. She said miscarriage is possible if I don’t get this under control.”
“Oh God. What do you have to do?”
“She mentioned iron supplements, a different diet, blood transfusions, rest.”
“Can you work?”
“She mentioned time off, but this isn’t a physically demanding job. I think I’ll be fine for a few months. I’ll need to take a leave later on, though.”
“We can work with that, absolutely.”
I stare at the white gauze around my arm where they spent hours pumping a bag of blood into my system.
“Have you told him?”
“No.”
“Honey, you need to.”
“He’s going to leave me. He doesn’t want kids.”
Her brows instantly furrow. “He told you that?”
“He said he’d want to be able to devote his time to a child and he wouldn’t be able to right now.”
“Maybe he’ll think differently now that it’s actually happened.”
“I don’t think he will.”
“Have faith in your husband, Darcy. He loves you, more than anything. This may be a shock at first, but he will understand.”
***
Benjamin’s assistant Tiffany is waiting outside her office to greet me, having been informed by the new receptionist when I got off the elevator. That office once was mine, and after the entire walk here that I spent in reflection, it’s hard not to be distracted by the sight.
“Mrs. Scott,” she says proudly, clearly set on congratulating me. That comes next, and I do my best to fumble through
pleasantries. Benjamin’s glass doors are fogged, but he’s in there.
“Can I go in?”
“He’ll be glad to see you. He’s been in a foul mood today.”
I don’t tell her the reason is probably because of me.
“Thanks,” I say, rapping on the door gently. I don’t know how I haven’t had a panic attack yet.
“Come in.”
I enter with a gulp. Benjamin’s focused on an array of papers covering his desk, glasses perched on his nose, and is typing something into a calculator. Seeing my movement, he glances up and doesn’t glance back down.
I wave stupidly.
“Darcy, I’ve been calling you all day,” he says, shooting up from his chair. He drops his glasses onto the mess of work.
“I know. I’m sorry.”
Coming over to me, he kisses my forehead and then my lips and nudges my chin up when I try to look away. “Are you feeling any better?”
I shake my head, eying the floor. This is going to be bad.
“No? What are you feeling? Why didn’t Cindy let you go home?”
“She did. I’ve been walking around for a while.”
Finally understanding, he straightens with an inhale and sticks his hands into his pockets. “Darcy, what the hell is going on?”
“I went to the doctor today.”
“Okay…” He’s clearly steeling himself. “For what? Because you felt sick? I could have gone with you.”
God, I don’t want to tell him.
“You’re fucking scaring me,” he says, his eyes wide like an owl’s.
“I’m…I’m pregnant, Benjamin.”
He stares at me for so long with no expression whatsoever that I can do nothing but sit down to wait for his reaction. I have no idea how long we remain in silence before he speaks.
“Pregnant?”
“Yes.”
“You went to the doctor today. You found out then?”
“Yes. When I woke up sick this morning, I suspected it then, realizing how long it’s been since my last period.”
He covers his mouth, shaking his head. “How far along?”
“Eight weeks.”
He runs a hand through his hair. “Jesus Christ.”
“I’m so sorry, Ben. I—”
Possessed By You (The Consumed Series Book 3) Page 6
