Rocking Standby

by Cassandra Lawson

  “I’ve seen Sebastian,” I reminded her. “You have plenty of inspiration with your sexy boy toy.” Sebastian was several years younger than Delaney and part of the design team for a sex toy app. I was certain Delaney’s own sex life provided her with plenty of material for her books.

  “That I do,” she agreed. “I still need to hear your stories. I may decide to write a rocker romance. The guy is in a band named Reckless Release. This needs a story. Where’d they come up with that name?”

  “One of their original members left when he got his girlfriend pregnant,” I explained. “Gage says Xander came up with the name after that.”

  “I wonder why that story never makes it into any of the articles about the band,” she mused before biting into her first slice of cake and moaning. “This is so damn good. The best thing about being pregnant is cake.”

  “Not the baby?” I asked.

  “Fine,” Delaney agreed with a huff. “She’s awesome, too.”

  “She?” I asked excitedly. “I thought your ultrasound wasn’t until next week. Did you run off to one of those imaging places to find out the gender early?”

  “Run off?” Delaney asked with a raised eyebrow. “It’s not like I need to leave the area to find a place to get one done. They’re all over the place.”

  “Did you already find out the gender?” I pushed.

  “No,” she replied. “We haven’t decided if we want to learn the gender during the ultrasound yet. I alternate between saying he and she. This way, I’ll be ready to start using pronouns until we come up with a name.”

  “What names are you considering?” I asked. The last time we’d hung out, she’d avoided answering that question.

  “We have no idea,” she admitted. “What kind of parents don’t have any baby names on their list? I name characters all the time, but I can’t name my own baby.”

  “I’m sure your characters make it harder for you to settle on a baby name,” I pointed out.

  “Thank you!” Delaney exclaimed. “Sebastian doesn’t get it. He keeps suggesting names I’ve already used. I can’t name my baby after one of my characters. Sometimes, he even suggests names that I’ve used for horrible characters. When I try explaining the curse I’ve put on the name, he looks at me like I’ve lost my mind.”

  “Do you have any guesses on the gender?” I asked.

  She shook her head. “Not a clue. I keep hearing about these women who instinctually know what they’re having, but I’m not one of them.”

  “What does Sebastian think?” I asked.

  “He’s sure we’re having a girl,” she replied. “My mom insists it’s a boy.”

  “I’d go with your mom’s guess,” I told her.

  “She has a reputation for being right,” Delaney agreed. “So, back to the hot rocker. Are you still pretending you don’t have a thing for him?”

  “I’m not pretending,” I insisted. “Besides, even if I have a thing for him, I’m not alone. Have you seen the fan pages for these guys?”

  “You’ve been checking out his fan page?” Delaney asked with a smirk. “How often do you do that? Are you following him on social media? You’re practically cyber-stalking the man.”

  “I’m not cyber-stalking him,” I insisted. “It was just a little research in the beginning, when I was trying to learn more about him.” I might have also visited some of those fan pages a few other times to see Gage playing guitar shirtless. “Women offer to have his baby, among other things.”

  “I’ll bet they do,” Delaney drawled. “That man is definitely lickable.”

  “Delaney Monroe!” I admonished. “You’re engaged.”

  “That doesn’t mean I stopped noticing attractive guys,” she argued. “None of them are as sexy as Sebastian, but they are still fun to look at. Are you going to see him again?”

  “I’ll see Sebastian when I drop you off,” I replied.

  Delaney waved her fork at me. “You know who I was talking about.”

  “No,” I replied automatically before adding, “Maybe. He invited me to the concert in San Francisco.”

  “I see,” Delaney mused.

  “What exactly do you see?” I demanded.

  “Did he ask you to buy tickets, or is he offering you a ticket?” she asked.

  “He offered tickets and backstage passes for me and a friend,” I replied. “It’s perfectly innocent. If it wasn’t innocent, he wouldn’t have offered to let me bring a friend.”

  Delaney snorted at my claim. “You don’t honestly believe the nonsense coming out of your mouth, do you?”

  “Fine,” I relented. “I’m sure he has an ulterior motive. It’s not fair,” I grumbled.

  “What’s not fair?” she asked.

  “It’s not fair that he’s good in bed,” I explained.

  “You poor thing,” she crooned, clearly struggling to hold back her laughter.

  “If Gage had sucked in bed or had a small dick, I would totally be over him,” I lied. Maybe I wouldn’t be craving sex with him, but I liked Gage for reasons other than his sexual prowess.

  Delaney shook her head. “Liar,” she accused. “I saw how disappointed you were when you lost his number. Granted, I’m willing to admit that the sex being great probably makes you want him more.”

  “None of it matters,” I told her. “I should stop texting him or answering his calls. I can’t be with Gage, and he’s still hoping for more than friendship. It’s not fair to keep leading him on by continuing to talk to him.”

  “I still don’t see why you can’t date him. The distance would make it difficult,” she remarked. “Still, Los Angeles isn’t that far. His brother lives up here, so I’m sure he visits, and it would do you some good to get out of the area for a weekend now and again.”

  “It’s more than just the distance,” I insisted. “You know I don’t want to get involved with a musician. Even if it weren’t for the drugs and alcohol, I don’t want to deal with all the women who throw themselves at him.”

  “I see your point, but maybe you’re being unfair to Gage,” she suggested. “I haven’t seen anything about him drinking excessively or doing drugs. The whole band has managed to stay out of trouble.”

  “Have you been researching Gage?” I asked in surprise.

  “Duh,” she replied. “I research everyone. This was all easy to find. The media’s been all over the fact that your boy has been avoiding groupies during this tour. Apparently, this is a new thing for him. They’re speculating that he’s seeing someone on the sly.”

  “That is a good reason for me to avoid any involvement with Gage,” I pointed out. “Can you imagine the media coverage if I started dating him? No reputable sources picked up that garbage about me and Colin being a couple. Other tabloids would jump on this if they thought I was going after Gage.”

  “Is that really the big issue?” she asked.

  “It’s a big part of it,” I admitted. “I like being in the background. Being in the spotlight is for my sister.”

  “Speaking of your sister,” Delaney began with a huge grin. “It seems she’s arrived. I guess we can finally get our shopping day started—after we eat, of course. The baby hasn’t eaten his slice of cake yet.”

  I turned and watched Mercedes stride into the restaurant. Every guy and a fair share of the women turned to ogle the blonde bombshell in five-inch stripper heels. Her breasts were practically falling out of her low-cut black blouse, and her jeans were so tight I wasn’t sure how she’d gotten them on. My sister owned The Frisky Beaver, a strip club in San Francisco. She’d started there as a bartender and saved up to buy into it when the owner decided to cut back his hours at the club. Within a year, another bartender had helped her completely buy out the original owner. At work, my sister never dressed like this. She favored conservative clothing and business suits.

  “Cami says you’re thinking about refusing to go to the Reckless Release concert,” Mercedes accused as soon as she took her seat.

  “
Hi, Mercy. I’m glad you could make it,” I greeted her before biting into my sandwich.

  “Ugh!” Mercy accompanied her expression of annoyance with an eye roll. “You can be so annoying, Bennie. You have to go to that concert and bring me with you. Three hot guys and not a girlfriend in sight? How could you make me miss out on this opportunity?”

  “I’m guessing there aren’t any girlfriends because they don’t want girlfriends,” Delaney pointed out.

  “Don’t ruin my fantasy,” Mercy said with a pout. She only pouted when she was teasing someone. I knew my sister didn’t care that much about finding a man. She was more than a little cynical when it came to relationships. She’d had married men hitting on her at work for years.

  “Since when are you a Reckless Release fan?” I asked my sister.

  “Since you’ve been crushing on the lead guitarist for months,” Mercy replied with a sweet smile.

  “Don’t try denying it,” Delaney added. “We all know you have a thing for him.”

  “I’m not denying it,” I insisted.

  “So, you’ll go and see him?” Mercy pushed.

  “I need to check this,” I began as I fished my phone out of my purse when it buzzed. I was hoping to use the distraction with my phone to steer the conversation away from Gage. “This might be about my business trip to Boston.”

  It ended up being a text from Gage. Apparently, I wasn’t going to get a reprieve from talking about Gage—not with my nosy sister close by.

  Gage: Are you going to come see me play in SF?

  Bentley: Are you sure you should reserve tickets for me? Didn’t that show sell out early?

  Gage: It did, but we always have a few extras. They go along with those backstage passes. Come hang out with me and the band. It will be fun.

  Bentley: What will your groupies think?

  Gage: I’m trying to cut back on groupies. They aren’t my style anymore. Are you going to come? Don’t make me beg.

  “Who are you texting?” Mercy asked. “Your boss isn’t trying to ruin our girls’ day, is he? James wasn’t such a dick when you were dating him.”

  “I swear you need a new job,” Delaney grumbled before looking down at her empty plate and sighing. “I should get another slice of cake.”

  “You shouldn’t be having that much sugar,” Mercy scolded as she craned her neck to try to see my phone. “Both our moms had gestational diabetes.”

  “They don’t know that there’s any genetic link,” Delaney argued.

  “Who told you that?” Mercy demanded.

  “Let it go, Mercy. You aren’t going to get Laney to give up cake,” I interjected.

  “Fine,” my sister began with a sweet smile. “We can focus on Gage. I saw his name on your phone. What does your rocking sex god want? Please, tell me he’s sending you naked pictures.”

  “No naked pictures.” Such a pity. “He was asking about the concert,” I admitted. “I still haven’t replied.”

  “Tell him yes. You have to go, and you should definitely take me!” Mercy squealed.

  “Cami is also insisting I take her,” I told her.

  “Ahem.” Delaney interrupted. “Don’t forget your favorite cousin who doesn’t nag you nearly as much as your sister or bestie do. I’m the best choice.”

  “You blurt out more embarrassing things than Mercy or Cami,” I pointed out.

  Delaney let out a sigh. “I would be tempted to ask how big Gage’s dick is. No one ever wants to share that detail with me. Of course, you could tell me now so I won’t be tempted to ask later.”

  “I didn’t measure it,” I replied.

  “You must have some idea,” Delaney insisted. “Let’s start with width. Can you wrap your hand all the way around it?”

  “Laney!” I practically shrieked. I wasn’t shy about this sort of thing, but I still wasn’t up for having this discussion in a crowded café.

  “I’m surprised she didn’t bring this up before now,” Mercy mused.

  “Me too,” I agreed. “It seems Delaney has more restraint than you or Cami. You both asked me right away.”

  “At least eight inches,” Mercy told her.

  “I’m the last to ask?” Delaney seemed shocked. “Stupid morning sickness threw me off my game. I also can’t believe you told Mercy before you told me. I should always hear about every guy’s dick first. Make that most guys’ dicks. There are some I don’t want to think about—not many, but a few.”

  I giggled at my cousin’s dick ramblings. “I didn’t tell Mercy,” I insisted. “She looked on the internet to find out before she even asked me. All she wanted from me was confirmation.”

  “According to all the reports, Xander has the biggest dick, but they’re all impressive,” Mercy added.

  “It must be a requirement for getting into the band,” Delaney mused. “Though, I suppose Harley probably doesn’t have a big dick.”

  “Gage says she has serious girl balls,” I added.

  “That’s what I read,” Mercy told us.

  “You are such a stalker,” I accused. “I can’t believe you’re this interested in hanging out with the band after what happened with Lex. The last thing I want is to get anywhere near that lifestyle.”

  “You need to get over this,” Delaney told me.

  “She’s right,” Mercy agreed. “Lex going to prison sucked, but you can’t blame his time in the band for that. He screwed up. It wasn’t the music that made him mess up.”

  “He was trying to live the rocker lifestyle,” I reminded her.

  “He was acting like a dumbass,” my sister shot back. “I love Lex, but I’m not about to blame others for his mistakes. He also knows this was his screw up, and he would feel terrible if he heard you were giving up a chance at happiness because of his mistake.”

  I decided not to argue with my sister. She was right about Lex feeling bad if he knew his past was part of the reason I wasn’t getting involved with Gage. I’d told my brother it was the distance and lack of compatibility. I’d told him I was just friends with Gage and neither of us wanted more. If Lex suspected there was more between me and Gage, he hadn’t let on. My phone buzzed again, and I looked down to find another message from Gage.

  Gage: No pressure if you don’t want to go. I’ll leave tickets for you and a friend.

  Bentley: I’ll try to make it. I’m flying back from Boston that morning.

  Gage: I hope you make it. We’re doing some promo stuff for the upcoming show in a few minutes. Can I call you later?

  Bentley: I’ll be in bed early tonight. I’m exhausted.

  Gage: Okay. Call me if you happen to be up after ten.

  Bentley: I will.

  I felt a twinge of guilt over brushing Gage off. While it was true, I should get to bed early, that wasn’t likely to happen. “I told him I’d try to make it,” I announced, hoping it would end the argument with my sister.

  “You’re going to take Cami if you go, aren’t you?” my sister asked with a pout.

  “No, you brat,” I told her. “I’m taking Lex if I go. He asked first.”

  Thankfully, we didn’t talk more about Gage or the show during the remainder of our day out.

  Chapter 28

  Gage

  Our show in San Francisco was only a week away. That meant only one more week until I could see Bentley again. Rather than focusing on the awesome show we’d just put on, all I was thinking about was Bentley.

  I’d been tempted to head back to the bus after the show, but the rest of the band had talked me into staying for the after-party. The groupies quickly realized I wasn’t interested, so they were focusing on Xander and Austin. I was sitting across the table from Austin, trying to figure out why women believed they could change him. Austin only went for women who were on the rebound and needed an ego boost. The scantily clad redhead by his side was playing the part, but I could tell it was a lie. Based on Austin’s lack of interest, he wasn’t buying into it either.

  “I’ve been so down
since Mitch left me,” the woman trying to climb onto Austin’s lap crooned.

  “That must be rough,” I said with a laugh.

  The girl batted her eyes. “It is. I miss him so much.”

  “As much as you miss Matt?” Austin asked with twitching lips.

  “Matt?” she asked.

  “The guy you told Austin you broke up with,” I explained. “Who do you miss more, Matt or Mitch?”

  Austin leaned over and kissed her cheek. “Why don’t you go see if Xander’s in the mood to play? If you tell him you can make waffles, he’ll take good care of you.”

  “I can make waffles,” she exclaimed happily before bouncing across the room to try her luck with Xander.

  “Do you ever get tired of being the rebound guy?” I asked. Austin’s reasoning for choosing women who were still hung up on other guys wasn’t clear to me. Xander thought it was because he was looking for an easy lay, but that didn’t fit with Austin. When we were on tour, that’s how things went, but I’d seen him stay with the same woman for a couple of months, building up her confidence. When Harley had once said it looked like Austin was doing penance for his past sins, he’d lost it, so I suspected that was close to the truth. Only Austin knew his reasoning.

  Austin shrugged. “It gets me what I need, and the women don’t seem to mind.”

  That much was true. The women Austin slept with didn’t have any interest in seeing him when they were done with him. I’d often envied him, even when I’d had a girlfriend. He’d seemed perfectly happy. Now, Austin seemed lonely. Though, it was possible I was projecting my own feelings.

  “You’re thinking about Ginger Ann, aren’t you?” he asked with a smirk.

  “Yeah,” I admitted. “I was also thinking that you seem lonely.”

  His laughter held no humor. “You’re right. I should have pretended that girl had broken up with Mitch and Matt.”

  “You didn’t seem that interested,” I pointed out. “We both know you only go after women if you’re sure you won’t break their hearts. Why is that, Austin?”

  Austin’s smirk was replaced with a scowl. “Don’t.”