Laugh or Death (Lexi Graves Mysteries Book 6)

by Camilla Chafer

  Nancy was leaving and evidently, didn't plan on coming back.

  I watched her for forty minutes as she crossed Montgomery, a surprising amount of people joining her and exiting at various stops. Finally, she got up, and the bus stopped before she climbed off. Through the doors, I could see a sign for Funtime Party Supplies, which made it my lucky day. I knew exactly where that was.

  Only one problem: Nancy stepped to the left on the sidewalk, and I couldn't see where she went next.

  "Guess where I'm going," I said to the laptop as I fired off an email to Solomon. I told him where I was heading and not to expect me in the office for a while. Closing the laptop, I reached for my purse and car keys. With a groan, I realized I was without a ride since Solomon drove us to his home and my VW was still parked outside mine.

  "Want to go on a stakeout?" I asked Lily when she answered her cell.

  "I love steak," she sighed, "but it's kind of early."

  "No, a stakeout. We're tracking my missing woman, and I have a hot lead."

  "How hot? Sizzling, medium rare, rare?"

  "Um... medium rare. I have a last known whereabouts thanks to your idea to track down the buses."

  "No way! I cracked the case! I will absolutely help you further. Where do you want to meet?" Lily's voice bubbled with enthusiasm.

  "Solomon's house."

  "She was last seen at Solomon's house? You need to ask your boss about that."

  "No, I meant, I'm here and I don't have a ride; so can you pick me up and then we'll track down Nancy?"

  "You should have just said," Lily huffed, "and not taunted me with steak. I'll be there in fifteen. Plus, I suppose I do want to check that you're not all holey. I read the news, you know."

  "Did you? Am I in it?"

  "Actually, Jord told me, so I have no idea. Lexi, why didn't you call me? I thought after that guy tried to kill you at home and I raced over in the middle of the night, you might tell me this stuff in the future."

  "I'm sorry. I was just so hungry after the shooting... danger does that to me... so we went out and got hotdogs and fries, and then ice-cream and then Solomon..."

  "Got really creative and did all kinds of dirty stuff to you, thanks to an adrenaline high from all that danger?"

  "No, it was all great and relatively clean."

  Lily sighed. "Disappointing."

  "Again, sorry."

  "Apology accepted! See you in fifteen!"

  Lily, true to her word, arrived outside Solomon's house in her turquoise-blue Mini just as I locked the door. I bounded down the steps and dropped into the passenger seat, enveloping her in a grateful hug. "Thank you for picking me up."

  "No problem. Anytime. Lunch is on you and here's your coffee." She handed me a travel mug and I sipped it. Delicious.

  "You're the best wife ever."

  "Tell me about it. No, tell my husband about it. Where to?"

  I gave Lily the location on Century and she drove us there swiftly while I filled her in on the previous night's details to her appalled oohs and ahhs. "You know what we need?" she asked when I had finished retelling the story for a second time.

  "No. What?"

  "A caped crusader."

  "Uh..." That wasn't the first answer to spring to my mind.

  "Well, maybe not caped, but definitely a crusader. Like Arrow. Or that chick from Dark Angel."

  "We need Jessica Alba?"

  "Maybe Elektra."

  "We need Jennifer Garner now?"

  "Definitely Jennifer Garner since she was also in Alias and is, ergo, a kick-ass crusader and a top international spy, with great hair and even better disguises."

  "She's an actress."

  "And married to Ben Affleck. She's perfect!"

  "I don't think Jennifer Garner is coming to help Montgomery."

  Lily sighed. "Shame. She'd make this place so classy."

  I just shook my head. "Did Jord have any more information about your robbery?"

  "No, just that they're working the idea that it's the same guys that shot up your date night."

  "So they ruined both our days."

  "Uh-huh. Hate them."

  "Me too. How's Kyle?"

  "At home, resting. Apparently, he got a concussion from the fall. I'm still thinking about firing him, but I feel bad since he just got out of the hospital."

  "He didn't mean for it to happen."

  "I know, but he didn't follow my rules, which I made for a reason. I might not get that money back from the insurers. Hey, is this the place?" Lily asked as we cruised past Funtime Party Supplies.

  "Yep, that's it."

  "Want me to drive around a while? Or do you want to park?"

  "Drive to the end of the street, then circle back. We'll park and take a walk."

  "Any idea where?"

  "Not a clue."

  "Glad I wore my not a clue shoes."

  Century Street was, as the local joke went, a hundred miles long. It wasn't really, but it felt like that when traffic backed up. This block contained the party supply store, along with a coffee shop, launderette, some clothing boutiques and a bar. The closer the road got to downtown, the more upscale the stores and bars became. Locals headed there for their post-work drinks and date nights. We were at the nicer end. There were also several bus routes making it very easy to get picked up by any one of them. I would probably have to check traffic cam footage to see if she were caught on camera.

  Unexpectedly, Maddox appeared on the same block we were on.

  "I gotta go," Lily said, hanging up on the call she received as we exited the car. "Got a mix-up with deliveries at the bar. Maddox, it was nice seeing you and what a relief to find you still looking handsome."

  "I do my best," said Maddox, frowning at Lily's backhanded compliment.

  "Keep up the good work." Lily waved, climbing into the car and speeding off just as I was about to remind her that she was my ride home.

  "She's perky," said Maddox. "Bizarrely so. Didn't her bar just get robbed?"

  "I think it's her coping mechanism. What brings you here?"

  "I wish I could say it was something interesting, but I was just taking a lunchtime stroll and wondering what to eat. The FBI field office is two blocks that way," Maddox added, jabbing a forefinger over my shoulder. "Want to grab a sandwich and you can fill me in on how you're still standing?"

  "You heard?" I asked, guessing that somehow, he already knew about last night's armed robbery.

  "Yep. I wanted to call, but, you know..."

  "No problem. As you can see, I'm fine." I brushed a hand over my body, pointing out the clear absence of bullet wounds. "But I am hungry and maybe you could offer me some perspective on my case?"

  "Let's walk and you can tell me about it."

  "So," I said, when I finished filling Maddox in on the case, omitting the details of the wager I made with Solomon, "how am I supposed to find a missing woman?"

  "Funny you should be investigating a missing woman."

  "Hardly funny," I countered. "Getting confusing, actually."

  "No, no, I meant it's funny because my caseload is currently a string of missing women. I'm trying to find out if they're connected, and how."

  "Can you ask them? No, stupid question, of course you can't," I backtracked when Maddox gave me a look. "Are they all still missing?"

  "Either missing or dead. What makes it harder to connect them is that each woman is from a different jurisdiction. We didn't even have any dots to connect until some cop had a beer with his cop buddy fifty miles away and they both came up with the same missing woman story. Except, it's not the same woman, just the same MO. Word gets around, and I ended up with a bunch of case files on my desk."

  "Lucky."

  "Yeah, that's what I said. I'm trying to pull the cases together with a solid connection, but it's not easy."

  "But you're the FBI."

  "I'm a little cog in the machinery that is known as the FBI."

  "But you have shiny credentials. D
o I have to call you 'special agent' now?"

  "Yes. All the time," Maddox deadpanned.

  "Okay, Special Agent Maddox, can you give me some insight on how to track a woman who seems to have disappeared off the face of the earth, but knows her name, even though she's supposed to have amnesia?"

  "Let's get a coffee first." Maddox pointed to the coffee shop where we arrived just as an appealing waft of my third favorite liquid spilled out. "We'll call it my consultant’s fee."

  "Thank heavens the FBI are cheap," I said, smiling as I reached for my wallet.

  "For that, you get to buy me a sandwich too."

  I rolled my eyes, but purchased two sandwiches and two coffees before we parked ourselves at the table in the window, taking chairs opposite each other.

  "You know I can't say much," Maddox began, motioning discreetly to the few people present. I was pretty sure I was the only one interested in what he had to say, but I didn't want to burst his special agent bubble.

  "What can you tell me?"

  "I can tell you that the best thing to do right now is go back to basics. Work with what you know. You've had eyes on her once, right?"

  I nodded. "For a few seconds, but she slipped away."

  "You've got two options here. Either wait for her to contact you because she knows you're looking for her. Or..."

  "Or?" I prompted.

  "Or, like I said, go back to basics. Work with what you know. She's working a low income job so she probably doesn't have much money or many belongings. She took a bus here, but not to a train station, so you could surmise she either can't leave town, won't leave town, or she's got someone here she trusts who will help her lie low a while."

  "Nancy didn't appear to have many friends."

  "That doesn't mean she doesn't have any at all."

  "I can't go back to Pretty Paws. The place burned down along with Nancy's apartment."

  "That's interesting in itself. Nancy might be hoping you think she went with it. She might think she bought some time."

  "I guess. There's no way she could know for certain that I tracked her here."

  "Here is good. This is a start. Look around, Lexi, where would she go from here at that time in the morning?"

  "I was doing that when I ran into you!" I replied, just so he didn't think I hadn't learned a thing in my time as a PI. Truth was, I was still a novice and had to learn how to trust my instincts, but Solomon believed in me and Maddox did, too. Lily thought I was amazing. Hell, I thought I was pretty damn cool, but that wasn't really important right now. "I'm looking, okay?" I said before doing just that. I saw traffic passing by on both sides of the street, busy as usual since it was the fastest route downtown. There were strips of various boutiques, a cleaner’s, a bar and a few other business structures.

  "I don't see anything that stands out."

  "Then maybe this is simply an area that enabled Nancy to get somewhere else."

  I took another look around, this time noting a traffic camera a little further down the street. She could have gotten another bus, but it would have been easier to go to the bus terminal. I had another idea. "Maybe Nancy got a ride. I'll get Lucas to hack the..."

  "Lalala didn't hear that." Maddox stuck his fingers in his ears and winked.

  "Even if it's true that someone picked Nancy up and took her somewhere, it's not much of a lead. I might not be able to find her if I can't get a look at the license plate."

  "You know, some people just don't want to be found. You can't solve every case. I learned that at MPD. That's why we have a cold case backlog. Some mysteries can't be solved."

  "I need to solve this one. It's not just finding out if Nancy is okay and reuniting her with Leo. It's everything. It's so much bigger than just the two of them. It's lost love, Maddox, it's hope."

  "You're such a romantic. This is just another case, Lexi, no matter what you think of the people involved. Don't let your emotions lead you astray."

  "Having emotions helps me understand."

  "Having too many will cloud your judgment," Maddox countered before taking a large bite from his sandwich. He gave it a cursory chew, then swallowed. "How have things been?"

  "Pretty good."

  "Glad to hear it."

  "How long have you been home? I thought you'd call."

  "A few weeks, and I'm sorry, I should have. I guess I didn't want to disturb you, what with you being ‘pretty good’ and all."

  "You'd never disturb me. I'm always pleased to see you."

  Maddox grinned and ran a hand through his hair. He'd grown it out a little so it waved through his fingers. There was a time when I really enjoyed running my fingers through it, but since we were just friends now, that was probably inappropriate.

  "Okay, tell me about your case. How many missing women have you got?" I asked, partly to change the topic, and partly because I thought it might help me understand what was going on with Nancy.

  "Fourteen missing, presumed dead. Eight definitely dead."

  "All the same perpetrator?"

  "Seems that way. There's enough to tie the deceased together, and similar pattern markers to suggest several of the missing could be as a result of the same culprit."

  "How long have they been missing? Why do you think they're dead?"

  "The oldest murder was ten years ago. The missing are anywhere from nine years to six months. The time missing, along with the bodies we do have, are why they're presumed dead."

  "That has to be rough on the families."

  "You have no idea. I've spoken to some of them. It's sad."

  "My guy is pretty cut up and it's only been a few months."

  "Not knowing does something awful to people." Maddox finished his sandwich, dabbed his mouth with a paper napkin and dropped it on the plate. "It's not easy to find a body either. We have to rely on good citizens to stumble across the worst thing they'll ever see in their lives. It's our lucky day and their worst."

  "You don't have any hope of finding the missing women?"

  "Hardly any. I read the police reports when they first went missing. No one really looked for these women after the trails went cold. They're not even proper police reports. These are small towns. No big, experienced police departments. They don't have the manpower to handle large-scale investigations and they don't have the know-how to keep the public engaged."

  "So why didn't they call the FBI?"

  "Each one of them thought they had an isolated case until our two lucky cops sat down and had a beer together."

  I sipped my coffee, musing over how sad that was. To be missing and have people abandon all hope of finding you. At least, I knew if I ever went missing, everyone would come looking for me. The thought of that warmed me far more than the coffee did. "What do you think happened to them?"

  "The deceased were definitely stalking-to-murder cases. The missing show a similar pattern, but I won't know more until I get out there and talk to the families and friends. I'll be out of town for a couple days."

  "Will you call me when you get back? That is, uh, it would be good to catch up on the case. Hopefully, I'll have something to report by then."

  "I'm sure you will. Thanks for the sandwich. I'd stay longer, but I better get back." Maddox got onto his feet and I also rose. For a moment, we stood there kind of awkwardly, until he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around me. I think he might have sniffed my hair, but that was okay because I sniffed his cologne. It was new and pretty nice. "Missed you," he said, softly.

  "Missed you, too."

  We held each other a moment longer before he let me go, stepping back. He patted his pockets and seemed assured that nothing fell out. "One last thing," he said before leaving, "there's something wrong with this amnesia angle. Try putting that aside, and you've got a different case altogether."

  "What do you mean?" I started to ask, but he'd already gone, leaving me alone with my coffee, wondering if Solomon really were right. Nancy Grant didn't seem like a woman with amnesia at all. She see
med more like a woman on the run.

  Chapter Nine

  "Lucas saves the day! Again!" Lucas said, summoning me with a hooked finger over to his monitor.

  "Not exactly saving the day," I murmured, leaning over to see what he pointed to. "What have you got?"

  "Saving your bacon," he replied softly. I debated cuffing him over the head the way my mother did if any of her five kids turned smartass, but decided against it. Lucas was really too useful to offend. "It didn't take me long to hack or find. Your hunch paid off. Nancy was picked up by this vehicle at seven am, ten minutes after she got off the bus."

  "Can you get me a license plate?"

  "I certainly can." Lucas held up the sheet of notepaper on which he'd written the plate number and I plucked it from his fingers. "I tried to get a screen shot of the driver, but I don't have a clear view. I'm pretty sure it's a woman though. Sending it to the printer now."

  "You are an angel," I told him, ruffling his hair before leaning over to catch the photo print the printer spat out. "A total bacon saver."

  "Knew it," he said, smiling smugly as he logged out of the system he illegally entered an hour before. His screens resumed their swirling screensaver mode and he leaned back in his chair, placing his arms behind his head.

  "Are you going to tell me what you're working on for Solomon?" I asked.

  "Nope."

  "Aww. Why not?"

  "It's not a fair competition if I tell what each of you is working on."

  "I assumed you already told Solomon what you've been doing for me."

  "I tell him what I've been doing in a ‘looking at bus cams’ and ‘hacking traffic cams’ way, but not my results or what I've found. You can rest easy and solve the case, okay? My money is on you."

  I brightened. "Really?"

  "Sure if that helps."

  "Thanks oodles, Lucas," I sighed, my smile dropping. So much for our tech geek's vote of confidence. "Tell me what tasks Solomon has you running."