Bound by Secrets

by Angela M Hudson

  “That’s the hope.” And drive a very sharp blade through my ex-sister’s heart.

  “Is that because you don’t want me to love you anymore, or—”

  “No.” I laid my hand over his. “I mean, you’re not under the curse now that you’re vampire, are you?”

  “They say you’re cured once you become a vampire, but I don’t know, Ara.” He rubbed his chest. “I think I’m still cursed. I’m just more aware of it now.”

  “In what way?”

  “It’s like I can feel it in my veins. Oddly enough, when I feed from you, it dies down for a while, as if just carrying a part of you makes me feel better.” He laughed. “If that makes sense.”

  “Then…” My eyes narrowed tightly in thought. “If vampirism doesn’t cure it…”

  “Turning David back won’t tell you if his love is true or not,” he said with a nod.

  “It doesn’t make sense,” I said, shaking my head. “Why wasn’t he cursed before then—when he was a vampire?”

  “I don’t know.” He patted my leg. “But hey, wanna hear something that’ll make ya smile?”

  “Sure.” And I was already smiling. His now forever youthful grin could always bring that out in me. He’d changed since becoming a vampire, seemed older, wiser. There wasn’t as much pain or indifference behind his eyes, and his fingernails were once again grown over the tips of his fingers and no longer colored with dried paint stains. Whatever frailties or infirmities he bore before, immortality had erased them.

  “You know how I made the change really fast?” he said in a leading tone.

  “Yeah.”

  “It turns out there’s absolutely nothing special about me.”

  My smile grew while my heart sunk with disappointment.

  “But, there is a reason for it. Jason had Eric take my blood and they sent it off to some lab on that island the queen lives on—”

  “Loslilian.”

  “Yeah. I can never remember the name, but yeah, that same place you’re going to. And apparently the doctors there said that there were traces of vampire DNA or something in me, which means that at some point in my family’s bloodline, one of us was a half-blood.”

  “Wow!” I sat right forward, taking both of his hands. “Do you know who it was? Who the half-blood in your family was?”

  “I’m doing some research, but I have my suspicions.”

  “Who do you think it might be?”

  “My grandmother, actually. Only because she once told me a tale about vampires, and some of the lore matched up perfectly with what I now know to be true. And then there was the tale of how the myths began—you know, the guy being buried alive?”

  “Um…” I tried to think of any stories I knew, but I’d never been told any.

  “Well, anyway, Eric was telling me heaps of stuff. He’s really cool, by the way, and so is Elora.”

  “I know.”

  “Anyway, so the stories he told me are the same ones I remember my gran telling me. So I think it was her.”

  “And she’s not around anymore?”

  “No. She died.”

  “Did you know her well?”

  “Not really. We weren’t allowed to see her much because Dad didn’t want her filling our heads with tall stories.”

  I nodded. “So there’s no way of finding out if it was her?”

  “Sure there is. There are old boxes in our attic. I’ll just sift through and see if I can find any details about Gran’s parents.”

  “Was she your father’s mother or—”

  “Mother’s.”

  “Hm,” I said, the cogs and wheels turning inside my head. “So if your gran was the half-blood, do you think your great grandfather or grandmother was the vampire then?”

  “My great gran never married, and she’s dead, so she can’t have been the vampire.”

  “So you never knew who your gran’s father was?”

  “No.”

  “Right, so if he was a vampire then he obviously left when the Set moved on.”

  “Yeah, that’s right—the Sets used to move on heaps, hey?”

  “Yeah.”

  “And they weren’t allowed to fraternize with humans much, were they?”

  “Not from what I’ve been told.”

  “So my gran was obviously an illegal child.”

  “Yes, and whoever fathered her might have gone to great lengths to keep her a secret.”

  “What was her name?” David asked, standing there in the doorway like he’d been listening for ages, yet neither Cal nor I heard him enter. I thought for a moment that he’d found Jason and had himself turned vampire again—way too quickly to be possible—but I could still hear his human heart.

  “Whose name?” Cal said.

  “Your great grandmother.” He walked right into the room. “What was her name?”

  “Why?”

  “I was a Council member—a guardian of the law. I knew every vampire under the western hemisphere, and I knew his business. If there were a man alive today that would know, it’d be me.”

  “Her name was Candice Elks.”

  David’s eyes narrowed, arms folding. “Not ringing any bells. What did she name the child—your grandmother?”

  “Gran was Marybeth Elks, no father to name.”

  “Hm.” He huffed thoughtfully. “That doesn’t really help.”

  “Maybe it wasn’t her,” I suggested. “I mean, he said his gran told him stories, but if she was a half-blood, it’s not likely she was told much about vampires. I’d think the person that knew the most was probably the person that knew the vampire.”

  “That didn’t make much sense, Ara,” Cal said with a laugh.

  “It’s like this: I know lots of stories because I was told them by my vampire friends, but my kids, who were born part vampire, don’t know that much yet. So if your gran knew heaps about vampires, then maybe she wasn’t the half-blood. I mean, did she die really old, because half-bloods live longer than average humans?”

  “No. She was only sixty when she died,” Cal said. “So maybe we’re way off track.”

  “Maybe your gran knew those stories because her husband told her,” I suggested. “What was your grandfather’s name?”

  “Martin Steele.”

  We both looked at David; he shook his head slowly, not making any connections in his ancient brain. “What about your father’s side? Maybe you’re even farther off track than you realize.”

  “On my father’s side…” Cal sucked air in through his teeth, thinking. “We had Jane O’Clair married to Elton Wickham, and their son… I think it was Joseph Wickham, but no one ever called him that. They called him by his middle name.”

  “Which was?”

  “Arthur.”

  Like a flash of light blowing out in front of my eyes, I remembered a rooftop and stars. I remembered David and the cold, his hand making mine warm. And I remembered him talking about his uncle—Arthur. It was rumored that he had a child.

  I looked at David to see if he made the same connection. It was a wild and outrageous connection, in truth, to think the man’s middle name was his father’s, but both of us wanted it to be. And considering Cal’s likeness to David, it wasn’t entirely impossible.

  As I looked at Cal, really looked at him, I started seeing so many more similarities, like a light being shone down on them all: the almost hidden dimple in the chin, the dark pink lips, perfectly shaped to make any girl jealous, the eyes, not the color but the curve of them, and even the set of his shoulders.

  David folded his arms, studying Cal more closely. “The original pronunciation for your great grandmother’s surname wouldn’t have been Auclair, would it?”

  “Yes. But they changed it to O’Clair when they moved to America.”

  “And she didn’t happen to be a cabaret girl in her youth, did she?”

  “Yes,” Cal said, turning right around to look at David over the back of the couch.

  David’s voice projected fr
om his lips in a hard, breathy laugh. He covered it with a fist, shaking his head. “That lying son of a bitch.”

  “What?” I said.

  “I asked him if it was true—that year. I asked if he had a child with her. He said it wasn’t his.”

  “He might not have thought it was,” I said. “Not if she was married.”

  “She wasn’t married at the time,” David said. “But she did marry quickly that year.”

  “But surely he knew the child was his. He’d have looked in on it, right?” I said. “If he even suspected it—”

  “Not likely.” David sat on the back of the couch, right behind me. “His heart was easily broken. And I know he assumed she’d betrayed him with the man she married, so I doubt he ever gave her a backward glance.”

  “That’s sad.” I pouted at Cal.

  “So who are we talking about?” Cal asked. “You both make a huge deal of this and leave me totally in the dark here!”

  I laughed. “Sorry. Arthur was David’s uncle.”

  “Uncle?” Cal looked at David, his surprise quickly becoming a taunting smirk. “So if we’re talking about the same vampire…”

  “That would make you two family!” I teased, knowing how much David would be loving this! Not.

  He shifted uncomfortably and stood up from his lean. “I’ll look into it.”

  “Come over to my house then, man,” Cal offered. “I’ve got boxes in the attic. You can dig through and see if there’s any letters or something.”

  David liked Cal. He would never admit it, but it occurred to me then, watching the way he looked at him, that most of the hatred stemmed from knowing Cal was under my curse. Knowing the risks he posed to me, not just by possibly making me fall for him, but that he could hurt me if he had a surge. Without that curse in the way, they’d be free to have a solid friendship, and if they were family, it was even more important. Fate had probably brought Cal into our lives for a reason. David couldn’t turn his back on that now, even though a big part of him wanted to. But if Cal was a descendant of Arthur, that made them cousins—the only other family David had, aside from his brother.

  He cleared his throat, washing down what was obviously a no, and nodded instead. “But it has to be when we get back from Loslilian,” he added. “We need to leave tonight.”

  “So Jason’s not turning you back then?” I asked, hiding the disappointment in my tone.

  He just shook his head, indicating with his eyes that we’d discuss it later.

  “Well.” Cal stood up. “I’ll get started on those boxes. If anything turns up, I’ll let you know.”

  “But you have to come with us,” I said. “I need someone to feed off—”

  “You can feed from me,” David said. “Jason plans to turn me when we arrive at the island. He figures you can go about curing this curse while I’m down for a few days. And until then”—he clicked his fingers commandingly at Cal and then pointed to me—“you can get by on what you drink now.”

  Cal looked uncomfortable. “You want me to feed her now?”

  “Yes.” He folded his arms, expectant.

  “With you here?”

  “What’s the matter?” David leaned on the bookshelf, smirking. “Got a reason you want me absent?”

  “Yeah,” Cal remarked smartly, sitting down beside me again. “I wanna fuck your wife, don’t you know?”

  “Don’t!” I looked at David, issuing him the warning finger. “He was just kidding, and you know it.”

  “Joke less. Bleed more.” David pointed right at Cal.

  Cal laughed, taking off his black leather wristbands. “He’s easy to rile up.”

  “Yes, and he’s also got no problem murdering you, so don’t stir him.”

  His throat made a crass grumbling sound. “I’d like to see him try.”

  Cal flew backward then without warning and I squealed, shooting to my feet. I saw only a flash of David as he tumbled over the couch and took Cal to the ground with him, both making so much noise it was hard to tell if they were laughing or yelling. But when David rolled up with Cal in a headlock and I saw the smile on his face, I smiled too.

  “If it makes you feel any better,” I called over all the noise, “I can feed from Jason.”

  David stopped punching Cal long enough to look at me, all breathy and red-faced with laughter. “You can’t. He’s the king.”

  “And?”

  “It’s forbidden,” Cal added. “Even I know that.”

  “Why is it forbidden?”

  Cal punched David hard enough to send him to the floor and then jumped to his feet, readjusting his shirt. “Monarchs get more powers when they make their oath, or something like that. Anyone that feeds on them can draw on that power.”

  “Except, with Lilith, it’s because she’s a Pureblood,” David added, grunting as he rolled up. “Her blood is sacred.”

  “As is mine, right?” I asked.

  “Yes.”

  Cal turned around and offered David a hand up. He took it, surprisingly, giving Cal a deliberate jab with his elbow once he was upright.

  “Which means this dickhead here is overly privileged to drink from you,” David finished.

  “And it means I’m even more powerful than you,” Cal remarked, shoving David playfully.

  “Don’t push your luck.” David shoved him back, giving him a second shove toward me. “Now feed her. I’m going to arrange the private jet.”

  “Oh, what? You mean you trust me not to fuck her while you’re gone?”

  David turned back as he reached the door. “You? No. I trust her.”

  “In that case, I’ll offer her the neck,” Cal teased.

  “Go ahead,” David called from down the short corridor. “And then I’ll have at it. With my hands.”

  Cal laughed, offering me his wrist.

  * * *

  Jason and Lily stood by the car with Beth, while the rest of our family gathered on the porch to say goodbye, and though it was only goodbye for a short time, I knew that we’d all be drastically changed upon our return, which made saying goodbye a kind of sad thing, as if this was a farewell to who we were now too. When we saw each other next, I would have committed murder and David would be a vampire again, all traces of the human I loved wiped away. Even Emily would have changed. While she raised Mike’s adopted sons as her own, I knew that going through it all from conception to birth changed a person in other ways. Em and Mike would go from living with the freedom of having older children to the often four-walled cell David described of having a baby. They would come through it, but it was clear that they’d need space. David and I would have to move out when we arrived home, and leave Mike and Emily to their own lives—their hopefully better lives with the curse removed.

  “You take good care of Uncle Mike,” I said, squatting down in front of Harry. “He’s going to need a bro to support him when Aunt Em has the baby.”

  “Got it, Mom.” Harry winked at me. “’Cause having babies makes women go crazy, doesn’t it?”

  I glared back at David, whose brows pushed up defensively. “I didn’t teach him that.”

  “Yeah right,” I said under my breath, turning back to Harry. “Yes, when we have babies, we can get emotional, so you make sure to be a good boy for Aunt Em and Uncle Mike.”

  “Okay, Mom.” He wrapped his arms around my neck and hugged me tight, his small and seemingly fragile little body bringing fear to my heart in the face of leaving him. Everything about him reminded me of a feeling, but I couldn’t place it. The overly sweet strawberry shampoo in his hair and the soft vanilla of Em’s fabric softener, even the way he let his legs dangle freely as I stood up, taking him with me, reminded me of something. Maybe it reminded me of him. If it did, if that’s what this feeling was, then it was a feeling like finally seeing the person that always makes your heart warm after a few days without.

  “Mike,” I said softly, my eyes watering a little as I saw the moment of adoration in his when he looked at me a
nd Harry. He deserved so much better than to be bound by my curse. I wanted all the happiness in the world for him and I would not return until I had the cure. “I…”

  “You don’t need to say anything, Ar.” He leaned in and hugged me and Harry. “I’ve known you all your life—longer than David has. I know what you’re thinking, okay. And you don’t need to say anything.” He kissed my cheek. “Just come home safe.”

  “I will.” I nodded, drawing back to hug Emily.

  “I feel like I’ve barely spent any time with you,” she said.

  “There just hasn’t been much time.” I squeezed her tight, bending awkwardly to make room for her belly. “But I’ll make time when I come back. And I wanna see a big fat healthy baby in your arms when I do.”

  “You will,” she assured me.

  “Good.” I gave Harry one last squeeze and then put him down, searching his eyes for tears. But there were none. He wasn’t at all fazed by our departure. I guessed we’d done this many times before while running a monarchy from home, and he was probably used to it. “Have fun, you guys,” I said, taking David’s hand as I walked away.

  “Safe flight, everyone,” Emily called.

  Jase and Lily waved at Mike and Em, and as I reached the car, I could finally hear my heart calling, begging my return to the place I once called home. It was past time to return there and it almost felt like it was my duty to go back. I wasn’t sure what I’d find there, what I’d see or what I’d learn about myself, but I could feel profound change on the horizon, and it didn’t scare me for even a second.

  I hopped in the car on the other side of Beth’s car seat and waved out the window as Jason drove us away, watching until my family turned and walked inside, closing the front door behind them.

  * * *

  To say that the sense of reconnecting—of intangible calm, of pure unadulterated peace—I felt, when the helicopter left us on top of a building, was profound would be an understatement. Something clicked as we came over land from the sea, and though I couldn’t remember anything of this place, I could remember remembering, if that makes any sense. I guess I had the strong feeling or maybe a kind of certainty that things would come back to me in time, and that if it were at all possible, the healing that had to be done by my heart, soul, and body, would be done here.