The Hot List

by Hillary Homzie

  Oh, wow. That explained how he was able to whip them up so fast. He nuked them even though he had put out whipped cream and chopped bananas and strawberries. I just wasn’t in the eating mood. I forced myself to eat one silver dollar–size pancake, just to please him.

  Then he pulled something out of his pocket. “I thought you might want this.” It was the scarf that Maddie had given me when she went to Barcelona. The one that I had thrown away.

  “But I thought—”

  “I found it in the trash, along with some postcards, and I was thinking that, maybe, just maybe, you really wanted to keep it. And the postcards. I put them in my room, if you want them. As a memory.”

  I didn’t know what to say so I said, “Thanks,” and stuffed the scarf into my backpack, kind of for good luck. Because today, after what I had to do in the caf, I really needed some luck.

  At school, Squid was pretty much doing the opposite of everything I had ever told him to do on my Hot List plan, except I did notice he had closed his mouth when he chewed his food when he whipped out a PowerBar.

  Like in Mrs. Tate’s class, he was singing the Spider-Man theme song, and the crazy thing was that Hayden, the Hayden Carus, started singing along with him, using his lacrosse stick as a conductor’s baton.

  Squid took out a Spider-Man pencil and swung it up and down like he was conducting an orchestra. Everyone was singing along. Mrs. Tate was laughing as she wrote up the whiteboard. Even Nia was smiling. But why not? She’d proven her point, and I was about to humiliate myself BIG-TIME during lunch.

  Each time I glanced up at the clock, I was getting closer and closer to my little humiliation show in the caf. I put the fuzzy pink boa, the sparkly shoes, and the tiara in a bag in my locker. Today, time didn’t go slow. It sped by.

  Right before lunch I went to my locker to get my bag.

  “Are you okay?” asked Heather.

  “Not really,” I admitted. “I’m going to have to work myself up to it.” My stomach grumbled like I hadn’t eaten in hours. Oh, right. For breakfast, I had only eaten one mini pancake. Somehow, I found myself standing in the line glancing over at Hayden’s table, and Mrs. Daltry, the caf worker, was mumbling something at me. “Do you want a hamburger or do you want to continue staring at the boys?” she asked in her jokey way. “I know I’m not as good looking as those hunks, but …”

  “What?” I stared at the meat loaf, and suddenly, I thought about becoming a vegetarian like Nia. “I’ll take the bean taco,” I said.

  Why did I get that taco again? There was no way I was going to eat that. It had all of these little black flecks that were so random. I thought tacos were just plain tan. How come I never noticed that before? And I realized that there’s a lot that I never noticed before. My stomach bunched up as I spotted Hayden, kicking a hacky sack under his table.

  I went to sit for a moment with Nicole and Heather when I found myself face-to-face with Nia. “Ready?” she asked.

  I fluffed my boa. “Uh-huh.” I snuck another glance at Hayden, who was sitting next to Auggie and across from Trent.

  “Awww, she’s turning red,” said Nia. “That’s so sweet.”

  I could feel my face growing all hot, which meant it looked red and blotchy. And I could feel my hands shaking.

  “Be quiet,” I said as quietly as possible.

  Then Maddie walked up next to me and lightly pressed on my shoulder. “Don’t worry, you’ll be fine.” She smiled. “You look kind of cute.” Was she trying to act nice? I hated how she kept being nice to me. It was so confusing.

  She lowered her voice conspiratorially. “Blue will love the glitz.”

  “Blue?” asked Ava, who suddenly appeared next to Nia, along with Amber, Sierra, and McKenzie. I remembered that Ava had curly hair last year, but now she got it straightened and her hair flowed silkily on her shoulders.

  “Blue is a guy who Sophie is crushing on,” explained Nia.

  “Yup,” I said, thrusting out my chin. “Hayden Carus.” Suddenly, I felt a little braver. Maybe because I was thinking about Squid in Mrs. Tate’s class and how everyone was singing the Spider-Man song along with him. That he completely didn’t care what anyone thought, and that was okay. Like right now, in the caf, Squid was doing yo-yo tricks with Elio and Gabriel. And even though they were knocking their chocolate milks over and stuff, you could tell they were having fun.

  Nicole and Heather rushed up to me and my little entourage who were all eager to watch my Hayden humiliation.

  “I can’t believe you’re really going to do it,” said Nicole.

  “Breathe, okay?” said Heather.

  I felt the five little pieces of paper, each shaped in a heart. The five embarrassing things that I liked about Hayden. “I’m breathing,” I said.

  I expected Maddie to be smiling all smug. After all, I was about to about to humiliate myself in front of this entire school. Or at least in front of an entire cafeteria full of seventh graders. But instead, she whispered, “Good luck, Sophie” almost like she meant it.

  Okay, that was it. “I’m going in.” I put my boa on over my shirt, slipped on the tiara and the shoes. “If I’m going to do this, I’m really going to go for it,” I said and marched, with my shoulders back, standing tall, right into the middle of the caf.

  My stomach flopped and wiggled like the Jell-O on my tray.

  That was when I started to self-talk. I had been crushing on Hayden Carus for a while. If Squid could be Squid, I could have the guts to confess that I actually liked Hayden. Maddie didn’t think I was an honest person in the feelings department anyway. And I didn’t hate Maddie for this. I was thinking the same thing myself. I hadn’t been real about my feelings. So, Hayden was a start.

  I stepped past the Quik Cart where they sold oranges and bags of chips. I kept my head up so the tiara wouldn’t slip. As I was halfway across the cafeteria, Maddie raced up to me, yelling, “Stop! You don’t have to do this.”

  “Yes, I do,” I said. I pushed up the tiara. “I’m so doing this. I promised.”

  As Maddie stepped back, I waltzed up to Hayden’s table, so I could face him front and center.

  I took a big breath. I didn’t gaze at his shoes, they might have been skater shoes or even those red Vans. I had no idea. I noticed his lacrosse stick leaning against his chair, and then I looked at his sea-blue eyes. I stood taller. I fluffed the boa. And I cleared my throat loudly.

  There were a few “ooohs” coming from the table, but then mostly everyone shushed as I adjusted my tiara, which kept sliding down my forehead. “Do you like it?” I asked Hayden, as I tapped the plastic crown. Auggie and Trent stared at me with wide eyes.

  “Um, yeah,” said Hayden, looking baffled. “It’s kinda nice.”

  “And my boa?”

  “It’s fluffy.”

  “And my sparkly shoes?” I hopped on one foot so he could see.

  “They’re definitely sparkly,” said Hayden.

  And then instead of talking, I sang. I actually sang out loud. I sang, “I wore them for you, Hayden!” Then I stopped singing and shouted, “Here!” I tossed the little red paper hearts, so they fluttered like butterflies over his head.

  “Ewwww!” screamed Auggie and Trent at the same time. They lunged to read the notes as Hayden swiped them off his head.

  That’s when I sprinted as fast as I could back to Nicole and Heather and Maddie and Nia and the rest of the girls who were all standing in one big clump.

  “She did it!” exclaimed Maddie.

  “I think I’m going to throw up now,” I said, taking off my tiara and the sparkly shoes.

  “You did great,” said Nicole. “Honest.”

  “Definitely,” said Heather. “I could never ever do that. You are so brave.”

  “Sophie! Sophie! Sophie!” chanted some boys in the back of the cafeteria. The chanting was started by Squid, of course. I glanced back over at Hayden, whose sea-blue eyes were now as round as pennies.

  Hayden ducked as his fri
ends threw the hearts at him, along with packets of ketchup and mustard.

  I did it. And it was over.

  Except not really because Maddie said to me, “I don’t want you to panic or anything. Or act weird. But, Blue, incoming on your left.”

  “Got you,” I said, nodding. Then I turned around and, sure enough, Hayden was strolling up to me. Oh, wow. Um. This time, I lost my ability to look right at him. Instead, I glanced down at the speckled linoleum, and then at his shoes. Hayden definitely had on those red Vans. I always liked those shoes.

  Was he going to tell me that I totally embarrassed him, like, in front of the rest of the caf? Probably, I told myself. I tightened my stomach muscles and prepared for the worst.

  “I like what you wrote,” he said quietly, and that was all.

  That he liked, actually liked what I wrote. I couldn’t believe it. And then he smiled at me, a full smile, and his sea-blue eyes crinkled. Then he went off to catch up with Auggie and Trent.

  Oh. This. Can’t be happening. To Me. This is. Too. Good.

  Maddie starting jumping up and down. And so did Nicole and Ava. Even Nia. Today, life was full of sparkles, fluffy boas, and BIG surprises.

  “I’m kind of done with the Hot List,” I said.

  “Yeah,” said Nia, smiling at me and playing with her clanking beads. “I know what you mean. You handled that really well,” she admitted. “And I think maybe your crush likes you back.”

  “Thanks,” I said. “I think maybe you’re right.” I didn’t expect that from Nia. Not at all. Maybe, just maybe, she wasn’t so evil after all.

  Nia tossed her corkscrew curls. “You can take off your boa now.”

  Oh, right. I had forgotten about that. “You know what? I like my boa. I’m going to keep it on.” As I retossed the boa across my shoulder, I could feel the feathers whooshing and tickling my neck, and, in that moment, I felt almost magical. Behind me, I heard what sounded like McKenzie, Amber, and Sierra mumbling something about getting their own boas at the mall.

  And then another surprise came my way because Squid bounced right up to me. Actually, more than bounced. He did a front handspring in the middle of the caf and said, “I can’t believe you did that. You stood up in front of everyone. You didn’t care about looking like an idiot.”

  “Yeah. That kind of reminds me of someone.”

  He tapped his chin. “I wonder who that could be? Hmm.” He was wearing his old crazy Power Rangers T-shirt, but somehow it looked cool and ironic on him now. “You know, you should really consider doing the talent show this year. You can actually sing.”

  “Maybe,” I said. “I’ll think about it.” I paused a moment. “Sorry you didn’t get on the Hot List.”

  “That’s okay,” he said. “But you did,” he said. “That’s awesome.”

  “I guess so. You never needed to get on the Hot List in the first place,” I said suddenly.

  “Maybe not. But I wanted to know what it felt like, and I decided I liked the old me better. When you told me about Maddie, I was all happy ’cause—digs chick me.”

  “I get it,” I said, smiling.

  “I missed my friends.”

  “I get that, too.”

  “And will you tell Maddie? That, I, you know, like her?”

  “Since you’re so shy?”

  “Well, I helped you out. I figured you could return the favor.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “That day, when I was with Hayden skateboarding, I sort of hinted to him, you know, that you liked him and stuff.”

  “What? You did what ?”

  “I figured I had messed things up for you earlier at the mall. So, I wanted to make it up to you.” I was about to completely chew him out but then, at that exact moment, Hayden turned around and, like, winked at me, like he knew what we were talking about. Oh, this was good. And in a weird way, it was all because of the Hot List. The Hot List that Maddie and I started, and that someone else was continuing. Who it was, I didn’t really know. Maybe it would always remain a mystery.

  After lunch I caught up with Heather and Nicole and filled them in on the Squid and Hayden situation. To say they were ecstatic would be an understatement. We kept on high-fiving one another all the way to class. I thought about how eating with them had actually not been that bad. In fact, I had really learned a lot about them because I wasn’t just relying on Maddie. For example, Nicole was really into anime films and had even got me seeing some. They’re pretty cool. And she could memorize dialogue straight from any of the movies she had watched. And Heather did hip-hop dance and was really good at it.

  “I can’t wait for winter vacation,” said Heather.

  “I wish I was going someplace cool. Like Hawaii,” said Nicole. “Instead it’ll be the mall.”

  “Me too,” said Heather. “But at least we’ll be able to hang.” She smiled at both Nicole and me when she said this.

  Before the Hot List, I would have never thought of hanging with Heather and Nicole. But now I’m kind of looking forward to it, and I’m thinking maybe I could invite Maddie along. Who knows—maybe even Nia, and some of the rest of the girls. Maybe.

  As the bell rang, out of the corner of my eye, I saw Brianna waving at me. She was about fifteen feet ahead, over by the water fountain. She was pointing at something.

  “What’s up with her?” I said, as she continued to silently move her mouth and make hand signals. “Seriously, what’s up with her?” I said to Nicole and Heather.

  Nicole shrugged. “No clue.”

  Then, suddenly, I got what was going on because I saw Bear throwing balled-up paper at her. He was flirting again.

  “They’re back to doing their thing,” I said.

  Nicole adjusted her backpack. “Apparently, your little display in the caf gave her the confidence to do her ‘five things I like about Bear’ in the hallway.”

  “Cute, huh?” said Heather.

  During break between fifth and sixth, Maddie came over by my locker, and I noticed that we were both wearing our Barcelona scarves. I had put mine on over my boa after lunch, as a peace offering, I guess.

  I pulled the scarf up around my neck. To me, it still smelled like what Maddie had said Barcelona smelled like—olives, fried potatoes, and those sausage thingies they plop on toasted bread. All of it.

  Maddie waved her scarf at me. It was just like mine, except it was lavender, of course.

  And I knew, at that moment, that she was still my friend.

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