Book Read Free

Chain of Command

Page 23

by HelenKay Dimon


  There was no real way to answer that without feeling like a boasting eighteen-year-old boy. “Uh.”

  Marcus shook his head as he let out a long exhale. “I meant fight, dumbass.”

  “Oh, sort of. Not really.” They talked, round and round, without settling anything. They discussed then had sex. That seemed to be their new pattern.

  “I’m going to guess that means you were too busy having sex to talk about the property.” Marcus folded his arms on the counter. “Part of me wants to high-five you and the other wants to punch you.”

  Which showed how much Sawyer sucked at separating the two. He leaned his head back against the refrigerator. Banged it a few times. “Fuck me.”

  “Exactly.”

  “It was great. Really great.” That didn’t even come close to describing the personal part. The sex, holding her.

  “Then what’s the problem?”

  “Me.” The growing sense that what he felt for her couldn’t survive their business issues. They’d tried to separate one from the other. Then he opened up about the land and so did she. All the talking spun them around in circles.

  Marcus laughed. “Be more specific.”

  Sawyer wanted normal, for his life. And now he also wanted a relationship with her. Beyond sex. Separate from the background noise of the party. Even when things were good, the bad loomed. He’d lived his entire adult life walking a line and he wanted it to end. He didn’t know how that could happen with what he still needed to do.

  “I have to send a proposal to her.” And he feared that once he did and she said no, which she would, they would be over. Maybe they’d drift for a while, but it would end.

  “We seem to be having two different conversations.”

  Sawyer didn’t blame the guy for being confused. Hell, Sawyer could barely keep up. “She has this room. There are stacks of proposals from developers and businesses for plans for the land.”

  Marcus frowned as he thumped his thumbs against the counter. “We can’t compete with that.”

  “I know.” He hadn’t been able to clear his head since finding out.

  Marcus stopped hammering out the beat. “So, why are we sending a proposal?”

  “I said I would.” When the staring didn’t stop, Sawyer jumped to the end, skipping over the part where he wished he’d never heard of the property...except for the part where it led him to her. “We have the business plan. I’ll use that.”

  Marcus made a face. “Still, why bother?”

  Time to drill down to the real issue. She seemed lost in this confusing place where she wanted him one minute and looked at him with a wary eye the next. He sensed she wanted to believe in him but the sheriff’s letter threw her off and had her doubting. Not that he blamed her. Well, he kind of did. He thought he’d earned more respect than that, but navigating this kind of stuff was never easy.

  With them it had been nothing but bumpy, no matter how he tried to smooth it out by not talking about the property nonstop. In hindsight, that had been a mistake. It drawled out the inevitable.

  But he’d still messed up on the personal front. Big-time. “You warned me.”

  “About Hailey? Sure, I’m a smart guy.”

  “Who can’t figure out his own love life.” Sawyer planned on skipping this part. Letting Marcus tell him in his own time. But now felt right. “Speaking of that, how’s Will?”

  Marcus froze. “Excuse me?”

  “You heard me.” Sawyer saw it now. The expert SEAL schooled his features but there was a second before that. A brief blip where emotion hit his face and the mix of frustration and confusion couldn’t be missed. “You and Will. Together. Dating...or is that too big a word for what’s happening?”

  Marcus pushed back on the stool and sat up straight. “You figured it out.”

  “Hailey did.”

  His eyes widened. “What?”

  “Knew from the first time she saw you two together. Apparently you’re not as unreadable as you think you are.” Sawyer couldn’t help but rub it in a little.

  “That’s a little scary.” But Marcus’s voice filled with what could only be described as awe.

  “It’s a new world.” This is where the conversation got harder. Sawyer talked like he knew from personal experience but he didn’t. He just wanted his friend to be happy. “Will could come out and—”

  Marcus was already shaking his head. “He won’t and I don’t blame him. How could I? I didn’t come out while I was still in.”

  “It’s not easy no matter what the law now says.” Sawyer understood. Attitudes had changed but not all.

  “How did we get on my personal life?”

  Sawyer shrugged. “I’ve got skills.”

  “Really? Then go use them on Hailey.”

  In theory that might work but Sawyer had seen the competition. He didn’t want to let Marcus down, let any of them down, but this amounted to the ultimate uphill battle. “I can’t see her going for the range. She stands to make a lot of money with the other offers.”

  “I meant go get her.” Marcus shot Sawyer a wake-up look. “You’re falling for her...or should I say fell?”

  No way was Sawyer answering that. He didn’t even want to think about that. “Your point?”

  “We can find other property and wait a few more months, another year, whatever.” Marcus smiled then. “But you may never find another woman who can tolerate you the way she does.”

  Only a friend could get away with that. “That’s very romantic.”

  “I was going for honest.”

  Sawyer circled around and took one more run at Marcus’s personal life. Something that, no matter what, he wanted Marcus to know. “Speaking of which, I like you with Will.”

  “So do I.” Marcus ran right over that huge admission and kept talking. “And since I like you with Hailey, I’m going to start looking for other properties.”

  Sawyer gave up the fight. Threw the white towel up and didn’t look back. Moving on might be the only way to keep her. If he didn’t put her in the position of turning his proposal down, they might have a shot. “Yeah, it’s time.”

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Hailey sat across from Molly at The Bakery and waited for some sibling indignation to show. Going back over everything, all the fights and disagreements over the last few days, one thing became clear to Hailey: she’d messed up. Accusing Sawyer sucked and she owed him more than an apology for that.

  She still didn’t know which way to go or how to spin out of the sucking vortex that kept dragging her down. She trusted Sawyer not to sleep with her just to get the property. But she still wasn’t convinced he’d stay if she said no.

  “You’ve stirred that coffee to death.” Molly glanced at the mug in front of Hailey. “It has to be cold and sugary and almost undrinkable by now.”

  Hailey lowered the spoon to the table. “I was thinking.”

  “I noticed.”

  They sat in a corner table by the window. At this time of day, not lunch or any real set mealtime, there were only a few people coming in and out. Kat stayed in the back working on a shopping list. One of her employees worked at the counter, handling refills and ringing up receipts.

  The place never ceased to amaze. Kat had put it together in such a short time. Hailey was proud to have played even a little role in helping Kat turn her life around and open the doors.

  She glanced over at Molly and thought about her working here. It would be a good match. “Are you taking the job here?”

  “I think so.” Molly pushed her empty mug away from in front of her. “I like Kat and the setup. I’d have a lot of responsibility.”

  “That’s good.” Except for the part where Hailey would become more and more entwined with the lives of the Cain siblings. That sounded good but it could go very wrong.

  “But all of this is totally unrelated to why you texted me and asked to meet,” Molly said as she sat back in her chair. “Am I right?”

  Very true and Hailey was
n’t quite ready to stop stalling. “How is everything with Jason?”

  “A mess, but stop avoiding.”

  Hailey saw so much of Sawyer in her. They both had this no-nonsense approach to life. She liked the characteristic except when it didn’t benefit her, like now.

  But she guessed there was something else at work. “Kat told you.”

  Molly nodded. “She said you and Sawyer had a run-in of sorts.”

  “He didn’t tell you?” Hailey had filled in her friends. She assumed Sawyer did the same.

  “Believe it or not, he doesn’t advertise about his love life to his baby sister.”

  That made sense. She could see him valuing his privacy. She didn’t have a sister and had no idea how to navigate those blood relationships. “I basically accused him of using me.”

  Molly winced. “Ouch.”

  “Yeah, I know.” Not her finest moment. Hailey had relived that argument so many times and tried to think of way she could have handled it so that they didn’t feel as if they were stuck in a draw. Nothing came to her. “We made up after, but the issue is still out there. The property issue keeps lingering.”

  “I mean, he wants the property. That’s not a secret, right?” Molly asked.

  Everyone said the same thing. It was a shared reaction that she didn’t join in. Hailey knew what they meant and how they got there, but they didn’t get to see how the property worked inside their relationship. Not talking about it now drove them apart.

  “No,” she said because it seemed like the simplest answer.

  “Do you know why?”

  Lost in her own thoughts, Hailey almost missed the question. “The part about the gun range is about more than having a steady salary and working outdoors. It’s about creating this family we’ve never really had. Yeah, I figured that out from some of the things he said.”

  “I just want to make sure you know who you’re dealing with here.” Molly rubbed her fingers over the handle to her mug. “I’m biased. No question. But he’s also pretty great.”

  “Aren’t siblings supposed to fight?” Love, hate...Hailey had no idea.

  “We do.” Molly shrugged. “When he told me this plan, I balked. He had to win me over.”

  “Because of the Jason piece.” Hailey could see that. The sparks those two generated could not be denied.

  “Yes, but I’ll only be working at the range when they need help.” Molly blinked a few times but kept talking. “Otherwise, I’ll be here.”

  Everything she said made sense. Maybe that was why Hailey liked Molly so much. Really liked her. She didn’t play games. She had a refreshing honesty and goodness about her. “You’ll be good for Kat.”

  Molly reached a hand across the table. “And you’re good for him.”

  Hailey almost hated hearing the words. Molly sounded so genuine and Hailey wanted to believe. Wanted to sign over the deed and be done. “I’ve been hard on him.”

  Molly made a humming sound. “Did he ever tell you how he picked the name for the gun range?”

  “No.” Hailey never even thought about the name. Now it would be all she thought about.

  “Ask him.” Molly nodded. “Then you’ll understand for good that he’s not using you.”

  Molly fought off Hailey’s rounds of questions for the next half hour. Molly blamed Sawyer. He usually had a tight control over her personal life. With Hailey he’d lost his mind and seemingly a good deal of his common sense.

  There was only one explanation...her brother finally found his match. Finally fell in love or was right on the edge of doing so. No wonder he kept moping around and mumbled about the property causing nothing but trouble. It was almost painful to watch, or would have been if she didn’t know how good Hailey was for him.

  Right as Molly was about to stand up and clear the dishes, Jason sat down. “You two seemed chummy.”

  Great, now he was spying on her. Molly couldn’t think of anything she welcomed less. “Is that a problem?”

  “Right now she’s making Sawyer spin around in circles.”

  Sounded like Jason was on Team Sawyer. Since Molly was on whatever team ended up with Sawyer and Hailey together she doled out a little truth. “They’re doing that to each other. I’d chalk it up to relationship growing pains.”

  He stared at her for a second without saying a word. “Is that what we’re having?”

  Panic hit her square in the chest. She could not do this again. “Nope.”

  “That kiss—”

  And she really couldn’t talk about that. “No, I was making a point.”

  “That you want me?”

  His ego seemed to be raging out of control. Lucky her. “About what you’re missing by skipping from one nameless woman to the next.”

  “You.”

  Every word he said, all crisp and sharp, sliced right through her. “Think more globally.”

  His blank expression gave way to a beat of anger. “What the hell does that mean?”

  “You are wasting your life.” She meant it, too. Forget what she wanted, what she always wanted, this was about his choices and where they would lead him. Sawyer didn’t say much now, but he would. Marcus would step up. When confronted Molly had no idea what Jason would do, and that scared the breath out of her.

  “I’m in a transition,” he said in all seriousness.

  Regardless, it sounded ridiculous. “Stop making excuses.”

  “You’ve never gone through a divorce.”

  “No, but I lived through your marriage.” She regretted the words as soon as she said them. Jason’s openmouthed gawking didn’t help. “You know what? Never mind. You’re never going to get it. You didn’t see it when Heather walked into your life, when she lied to you. You won’t see it now.”

  He leaned in closer. “What is the ‘it’ you’re referring to?”

  Molly hadn’t meant to wander down this road. She’d been trying to ignore him. Stay in a group, not be a smartass, generally fade into the background until the gruffness between them smoothed out. “That your life could be so much better. If you stopped running.”

  He scoffed. “I don’t run.”

  She’d hit the end point. There were really no customers to pretend to serve...and she really didn’t work there yet anyway. But she had to stand up. Put some air between them. “Then keep doing what you’re doing.”

  “You don’t get a say.”

  And there was the final cut. It jabbed right into her. “I know. You’ve made that clear.”

  He shook his head as he exhaled. “Molly, I didn’t mean—”

  “See you around.”

  * * *

  Hailey shut the door behind Sawyer after he walked into her house that night. He’d used the intercom rather than the code she’d given him to get around the alarm. He said he didn’t want to scare her but the choice just seemed to widen the divide between them.

  So would this but she had to ask. “You didn’t bring me a proposal today.”

  She wanted it handled and over. She didn’t see how they could move forward and figure out what was happening between them with this thing sitting there. His refusal to face it made her crazy.

  “I’m working on it.” He dropped his keys on the table and headed for the couch.

  She’d never thought of him lying to her. In that instance she got a flicker, a sense that he was only telling part of the story. She didn’t know if he was in denial or plotting or trying to separate, but she wanted to know. “You said it was done.”

  He stopped in the middle of sitting down and stood up again. “Later.”

  Anxiety ramped up inside of her. The need to settle everything, take the risk, hit maximum speed. She’d hemmed him in and limited his ability to plead his case. Now she was desperate to hear it and he kept fighting her.

  “We need to settle that part of our relationship.” Could he really not see that? She finally did.

  He shook his head. “It’s separate from this.”

  What he didn�
�t say was that this was the way she wanted it, but she could feel it in his tone. But she no longer believed the separation made sense. Not after that sheriff’s letter and the wedge it stuck between them.

  They’d danced around it and grew together on one level, all while knowing this huge thing loomed out there ready to rip them apart. And then there was the matter of his word choice. “This?”

  “We need to get naked.”

  He kept hiding, this time in a place that felt familiar and comfortable. “Sawyer, please.”

  “Now.” He held out a hand to her.

  Standing there, the need plain on his face. She had almost no resistance to him.

  Maybe she had to go around this and find another way. She didn’t really know anymore. “Will you tell me one thing?”

  His arm dropped to his side. “If I can.”

  “What or who is Greenway?” She already knew it was a man’s name but sensed she’d get more information if she hid even that fact.

  Sawyer’s eyes narrowed. “Did you talk with someone?”

  Sometimes he was a hard man to trick. That was probably a good thing in a marine. “You could try answering.”

  “The name of the first guy I served with who died. He was young and gung-ho, but terrified on the inside just like the rest of us.” A bleakness moved into Sawyer’s eyes. “He was in action for two days before a sniper’s bullet clipped his neck.”

  She heard her sharp intake of breath. “That’s awful.”

  “He was twenty.” Sawyer just stood there with his arms by his side. “Seemed to me if you died that young you should have something named after you, so I vowed to do that. Little did I know how many other twenty-year-olds I’d see die in front of me.”

  And there it was. The last barrier keeping her from falling totally in love with him fell. Crashed right at her feet. She could almost hear it. Her doubts were about fear, not about who he was. He was a good man, the best man. He deserved the property and she would figure out a way to let go and give it to him.

  She went to him then. Put her palms over his fists and held there until he unclenched his fingers. “Only a sweet and honest man would do that.”

 

‹ Prev