Savior of Regrets: A Mafia Romance Standalone (Verona Legacy Book 4)

by L A Cotton

  “E,” Nora chided. “Don’t be mean. Hey, Matt, how’s it going?”

  “Oh, you know, the woman I’ve spent the last eight months trying to forget shows up out of the blue looking like she got into a fist fight with Deontay Wilder and is acting like I’m the bad guy.”

  She shot Enzo a concerned look before sliding into the booth beside me. “Sounds like you need a strong drink.”

  “Babe, if the state of him is anything to go by, he already had enough to drink.”

  “I’m fine,” I protested, nursing my empty glass. “But I am out of liquor.”

  “Get the guy another drink, boyfriend,” Nora sassed. “Me and Matt need a little talk.”

  Oh God.

  I loved Nora like a sister, but I didn’t want one of her motivational speeches right now.

  Enzo’s brow quirked and she waved him off with a chuckle.

  “The two of you seem happy,” I said.

  “We are. Blissfully. But I don’t want to talk about me and Enzo, I want to talk about you. How are you holding up, really?” She pinned me with her big, brown eyes, and I felt stripped bare. But that was Nora, always seeing right through people’s bullshit. It was one of the reasons I’d known from the beginning that she would be good for Enzo. He needed someone with an inner strength and confidence. And Nora Abato had that in spades.

  Enzo never stood a chance.

  I smiled to myself, and she asked me, “What?”

  “Nothing,” I replied. “Just thinking how much fun it’s going to be watching you domesticate E.”

  “Don’t let him hear you say that.” We shared a conspiratorial smile. “Now, back to my question. How are you?”

  “I’m… messed up, Nor. Really fucking messed up.”

  “Oh, Matt. Come here.” She slipped her arms around me and hugged me tight. “It must have been a shock seeing her… like that.” Nora eased away, offering me a sympathetic smile. “Enzo said it’s bad.”

  “I barely recognized her.” But I would’ve noticed those green eyes and red hair anywhere.

  “I can’t imagine…” She shuddered.

  “She wouldn’t even talk to me, Nor.”

  “Caitlin has been through something traumatic. Her response wasn’t about you, Matt, it was about the situation. Trust me, I know.”

  “I know. Shit, I know.” Enzo had said the same thing. But it didn’t stop the gnawing pit of despair I felt every time I pictured the horrified look in Cait’s eyes when she’d noticed me.

  “Tell me about her. About how you two met.”

  “You mean E didn’t give you the CliffsNotes version already?”

  “I don’t care about his version; I want your version.”

  I let out a deep sigh, my eyes flicking to where Enzo was chatting with Billy at the bar. He was obviously giving me and Nora a minute.

  “It was last summer before the semester started. We were in Providence on… a job.”

  She rolled her eyes. “I know what you guys do, Matt.”

  “After we left DiMarco’s, I was headed for my truck when I heard a scream. I went to check it out and found some asshole trying to mug Caitlin.”

  “Holy crap. What did you do?”

  “Told him to beat it and offered her a ride home.”

  “I’m guessing you gave her more than a ride home.” Her eyes twinkled.

  “Ha-ha, very funny. But yeah, I stayed the night with her. The storm was wild, and she seemed shook up. We played poker and things escalated.”

  “Then what happened?”

  “The next morning, I practically begged for her number, but she wouldn’t give it to me.”

  “You never saw her again?”

  “No. I checked out her place once, but she was gone.” I’d never told anyone I’d been back to find her. In fact, I’d downright lied when I’d talked to Nicco about her. Told him that she’d blocked my number… when really, she’d up and disappeared as if she had never existed.

  “What do you mean gone?”

  “She didn’t live there anymore.”

  “That’s… weird.”

  “Right?”

  “And she didn’t say anything about DiMarco that night?”

  “Nope.” But I hadn’t exactly been upfront about who I was either. “Told me she worked at a diner called Stella’s,” I added.

  “You don’t think there’s a diner called Stella’s?”

  “There might be a diner, but I’d put a hundred bucks on her not working there.”

  “So she lied.”

  “It would seem so.” My jaw clenched.

  I still didn’t know the truth… because Caitlin wouldn’t fucking talk to me.

  She didn’t owe me anything, I knew that. But damn, I’d thought we’d shared something special that night. Maybe it was one-sided though. Maybe she hadn’t felt the connection burning between us.

  Maybe I’d spent the last eight months spinning it into something it wasn’t. A fantasy.

  A dream.

  “So what are you going to do?”

  “Do?” I blinked at Nora, and she chuckled.

  “Don’t seriously tell me you’re going to stand by and let her slip through your fingers again?”

  “You heard the part where she doesn’t want to talk to me, right?”

  “Yeah, but come on, Matt, this is you.”

  “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

  “You’re the charmer. The sweet one. The good guy. If anyone can win her over, it’s you. After everything she’s been through, she’ll need reminding that good guys still exist.”

  “I want to kill him, Nor.” My fist clenched against the table. “I want to drive down to Providence and—”

  “Matteo, look at me.” She covered my hand with her own, prying my fingers open. “That’s not you talking.”

  “Isn’t it? You didn’t see what he did to her. You didn’t—”

  “Listen to me and listen good. I know it hurts. I know you want to fix it and try to make it right. But that is not a path you want to walk, Matt, because if you do, you might never come back.”

  “Everything okay?” Enzo finally returned to our booth.

  “Yeah, babe. We’re good. Right, Matt?”

  “Yeah,” I grumbled, accepting my drink from him.

  “Jimmy says there’s a fight tonight, if you want in.” He studied me.

  “No, he doesn’t want in.” Nora balked. “For God’s sake, E. Fighting doesn’t fix—”

  “Tell him I’m in.”

  “What?” Nora whirled on me. “Have you lost your goddamn mind? You don’t fight, Matt. It’s not—”

  “Relax, babe.” Enzo ran a hand down his face. “It’ll help him burn off some energy.”

  “And get his pretty face mangled in the process. This is a bad idea.” She glanced between us. “A very bad idea.”

  Enzo grinned. “But sometimes the bad ideas are the most fun.”

  Nora was right.

  This was a really bad idea.

  That’s all I could think as the brute of a man circled me. Shirtless, his thick, corded muscles rippled as he held his fists up in front of his face.

  “I’m coming for you, kid.” He gave me a crooked grin.

  “Get him good, Matt,” Enzo yelled from somewhere behind me. The two whisky chasers he’d insisted I down before climbing into the ring burned inside me. It had given me a false sense of security before my opponent appeared.

  I can do this, I’d thought while I wrapped my fists and let Enzo school me on the softest places on a body to punch.

  But looking at him now, I realized two things.

  I couldn’t do this… and whatever was about to come, was really going to fucking hurt.

  In a blur the guy flew at me, his fist crashing into my face. Pain exploded along my jaw, my head snapping back.

  “Fucking pussy,” the guy hissed, dropping back to let me catch my breath.

  “Shake it off, Matt, let’s go.” Enzo clapped hi
s hands, as I hit myself gently a couple of times trying to focus.

  I can do this… I can do it.

  I pictured Caitlin, her bruised face and sad eyes. Rage flooded me. Red hot uncontainable rage.

  Without thinking, I lunged forward, driving my fist into whatever part of the guy I could find. Bone crunched against bone, blood splattering the air.

  “Motherfucker,” he grunted, his pained cries drowned out by the bloodthirsty roar of the crowd.

  I didn’t give him time to come up for air, driving my fists into his face, his ribs, and stomach. Over and over, I punched him, imagining Zander DiMarco’s sleazy face.

  Fuck, I hated that piece of shit. He’d hurt Caitlin. My Cait.

  Deep down, I knew she wasn’t mine, but it didn’t matter. My heart, my foolish fucking soul had claimed a piece of her that night last summer, or she’d claimed a piece of me. I still couldn’t quite process what I felt after seeing her again. But I knew without a doubt, that DiMarco had made a mistake ever laying his hands on her.

  Blood coated my knuckles, sweat rolling down my back as I bounced on my feet, sparring with the guy. He gave me a good few hits back, grazing my eye; and catching my jaw a couple of times, once enough to rattle my teeth.

  The longer we fought, the more I settled into the bursts of pain. The feel of his soft tissue bowing under my fists. And for a split second, I could understand why my cousin Nicco had once needed this to stave off his own demons.

  We both began to tire. I was fit; I liked to workout as much as the next guy, but I’d underestimated how intense going one on one with a guy—almost twice my size—would be.

  “Come on, Matt, finish him,” Enzo roared, spurring me forward again. We crashed together, jabbing ribs and kidneys.

  Pain radiated deep inside my body, but I let it fuel me for one last attack.

  “You’re mine, pretty boy,” the guy spat, slumping away to circle me again.

  But I was ready for him.

  I was ready to end this.

  He came at me, and I ducked his oncoming fist, rolling away enough to counter hit. My knuckles grazed his jaw and I smiled to myself, ready to end this.

  But I didn’t see his other fist between us.

  “Matteo, watch—”

  The uppercut sliced into me, rocking my whole body and I began to topple.

  “Matt!”

  I hit the floor, everything inside me cracking, a wave of pain crashing over me.

  My eyes shuttered and the last thing I saw was the guy grinning down at me with victory in his eyes.

  “Did I win?” I cracked an eye open, wincing in pain.

  “You almost had him,” Enzo said, fighting a smirk.

  “Asshole.” Nora slapped him upside the head. “I told you this was a bad idea.” She crouched down beside me and pressed a bag of frozen peas to my face. “This will hurt.”

  I hissed; the pain almost unbearable.

  “Ah, don’t be such a pussy,” Enzo murmured.

  I managed to lift my arm and flip him off. He chuckled.

  “Tell me it didn’t help,” he challenged. “Tell me you don’t feel even a fraction better for working off some of that anger.”

  I couldn’t.

  Because the truth was, for a minute, I had felt better. I didn’t feel so great now though.

  “How bad is it?” I asked.

  “You’ll live,” Nora said. “Although you might have one or two new scars on your pretty face.” Her lip curved with amusement, but I saw the pity in her eyes.

  Shaking it off, I said, “Aww, you think I’m pretty.”

  “I think you’re an idiot. What the hell were you thinking?”

  “I was thinking I wanted to drive to Providence and put a bullet through DiMarco’s eyes, but since you wouldn’t let me do that, I had to settle for fighting the Hulk.”

  “The Hulk?” Enzo snorted. “The guy wasn’t that big.”

  “Fuck you, stronzo, fuck you.”

  “Hold these.” Nora slapped my hand over the peas and stood. “I need to call Ari and tell her you’re awake.”

  “Shit, you called Nic?”

  “Don’t look at me,” Enzo said, his eyes flicking to Nora.

  “What?” She shrugged. “She texted and I wasn’t going to lie about where we were.”

  “Ah shit, Nora.”

  “Should have thought about that before you decided to get in the ring.” She walked off, leaving me and Enzo alone.

  “How are you holding up really?” he asked.

  “I’m messed up.” I stared up at the ceiling. “I can’t get her out of my head, E. I can’t stop thinking about what that fucker did to her.”

  “You really care about her.”

  “It’s crazy, right?” My eyes slid to his. “I haven’t seen her in months. But I can’t explain it, that night… something inside me clicked into place.”

  “You sound like Nicco with all that written-in-the-stars bullshit.”

  “Yeah, maybe.” I let out a weary breath.

  “What are you going to do?” he asked quietly.

  “There isn’t much I can do right now. She doesn’t want to talk to me, and I don’t want to be another guy who demands things from her. Not after…”

  “He’ll pay, Matt. One way or another, DiMarco will get his. But we have to be smart, we have to take our lead from Uncle Toni.”

  “I know.”

  I did.

  But it didn’t mean I had to like it.

  “And until then, I guess you’re just gonna have to be patient.”

  I glanced over at him. “Nora’s changed you, cous.”

  “Fuck off. I’ve always been full of useful advice.”

  My brow arched, and he grumbled something under his breath.

  “Oh yeah, you’ve always been a real Dr. Phil type.” I smirked.

  “I’ll keep my final piece of advice to myself then,” he said.

  “Nah, go on. It might help.” I let out a chuckle but ended up choking on the wave of agony ripping through me.

  “You good?”

  I nodded, finally catching my breath.

  “Well, you know what they say, cous. The best things come to those who wait.”

  I rolled my eyes at him, shaking my head incredulously. “Who are you and what have you done with Lorenzo Marchetti?” I teased.

  “It’s regular pussy, Matt. It changes a guy.”

  “I wouldn’t know,” I murmured, hating the ache in my chest.

  Silently hoping Enzo was right.

  That all I needed to do was be patient and wait it out.

  After all, I’d waited this long for her to walk back into my life.

  Chapter 7

  Caitlin

  It took me two days to recover. After passing out in Nicco and Arianne’s apartment, I slept… and slept… and slept some more.

  They had their family doctor come and check on me, but he said it was to be expected after such a traumatic event.

  But this morning, when I woke up in the soft beige sheets, I forced myself out of bed and found Arianne in the kitchen area of their open plan living room.

  “Hey, you’re up.”

  “Hi.” I smiled weakly, joining her at the breakfast counter.

  “How are you feeling?”

  “Like I slept for two days.”

  “The doctor said rest is good.”

  “You didn’t need to do that,” I said.

  “We were worried. You passed out and—”

  “Thank you.” I cut her off. I really didn’t want to do this… whatever this was.

  “Coffee?”

  I nodded, perching on a stool. My body ached, my muscles tired and weary. Or maybe that was my soul.

  “Can I ask you something?” Arianne said as she made our drinks.

  “Sure…”

  “Before, when we arrived here, with Lowell…”

  “The bellhop?”

  It was her turn to nod. “You gave him a false name.”
/>
  “I thought it would be safer.” I shrugged.

  “No one will hurt you here, Caitlin. I need you to know that.”

  But I didn’t know that.

  How could I?

  Zander wasn’t some two-bit club owner. He was connected. And he was obsessive in a way that terrified me. Not to mention the fact that the Marchetti had direct ties to him. All it would take was for someone to say the wrong thing at the wrong time and word could get back to him…

  “Caitlin?”

  I blinked over at Arianne. “Sorry, what?”

  “I asked if you want sugar and creamer?”

  “Oh, yes please.”

  She pushed the steaming mug of coffee toward me. “I took the liberty of buying you some new things yesterday. I hope that’s okay.”

  “I… you didn’t need to do that.”

  “I know I didn’t need to. I wanted to.”

  “I’ll pay you back.” I didn’t know how, but I would.

  “You can take a look at what I got in a bit and if you need anything else before we leave for the cabin, I can get them for you.”

  “Thank you.” The words got stuck on the lump in my throat, tears pricking the corners of my eyes.

  “Cait,” she said softly, reaching over the counter and resting her hand atop mine. “You’re going to be okay.”

  Another nod. It was all I could manage.

  “Are you ready to talk about what happened?”

  Pressing my lips together, I shook my head. I wasn’t sure I’d ever be ready. Besides, there were too many skeletons in my closet, and if I started down that road… No, I couldn’t go there.

  Ever.

  Sympathy filled her expression, but she didn’t push, and heavy silence enveloped us. I loosened a breath when there was a loud knock at the door, but my relief was quickly doused in fear.

  “It’s okay,” Arianne said. “Security only lets up approved guests.”

  Approved guests? Wow. I didn’t know what to say to that, so I sat quietly, watching as she went to open the door.

  “Luis.” She threw her arms around the immaculately dressed man. “It’s good to see you.”

  “Nicco said you might need me.”

  “Come in.”

  She led him over to the kitchen. “Caitlin, this is Luis, our head of security.”

  I stared at him, unable to speak.