The Replacement Crush

by Lisa Brown Roberts

  “Be back in a few,” he mumbled, brushing past me and sending shock waves through my body. He kept his eyes averted so I wasn’t able to gauge his mood by his eyes like I usually did.

  Once the women left, I examined the pile of books next to Dallas’s laptop and noticed he was almost done with the fantasy and sci-fi books. So today was it—our last day working together.

  I glanced at his screen and read the tab names open on his internet browser. Insider Gaming Cheats. Cello Masters. I leaned closer to his screen. Hunkalicious Heroes. He was reading my blog again? Heat flooded through me as I recalled my current hot aliens blog and my first kiss quiz.

  He had one more tab open. Fisk Vilhelm Screen Debut. Huh. That was weird. Then again, maybe not. Apparently Dallas was a bit star struck.

  According to Jaz’s secret intel, Fisk was still staying at The Lodge in one of the private cabins. I’d kept Fisk’s secret though I wished I could tell someone that I’d met him and how cool he was.

  When the bell on the door jingled I jerked away from Dallas’s laptop, guilt flooding through me. Checking out his internet tabs was almost like him eavesdropping on my conversation with Mrs. Sloane. Or wandering into the middle of a book club discussion.

  His soapy clean smell filled my nose as he moved behind my chair along with the smell of smoothies. He placed a cup next to me. I could tell by the color and smell it was chocolate and peanut butter, my favorite.

  “Thanks.” I smiled at him as he sat down with his green smoothie. He always went with the healthy choice, just one more annoying example of his impressive self-discipline.

  “Sure,” he said, avoiding eye contact. He skimmed the jacket of a book and started typing.

  Was he mad at me? Or just embarrassed from the McNerd protractor thing? Not to mention the raucous debates from The Lodge guests. Ugh. It was kind of amazing he hadn’t run out of the store screaming today. I tried not to think about how much I’d miss him once our project was finished.

  I took a long slurp from the smoothie straw, making that loud bubbling noise that drove my mom nuts. I watched him from the corner of my eye and saw his lip quirk up at my noisy drinking. I opened a desk drawer and fished out a five-dollar bill, then slid it across the desk. He stopped typing to stare at the cash.

  “What’s this for?” he asked.

  “My smoothie.”

  He frowned. “Don’t worry about it.” He paused. “Besides, it has the antidote.”

  It was my turn to frown. “What antidote?”

  “For the Spock virus. The one that made all his human emotions spill out. If you drink this smoothie, you’ll be able to retain your Vulcan cool and complete your mission.”

  I stopped slurping, detaching my lips from the straw. His eyes darted to my mouth, then he turned away, focusing on his screen again, but I saw a hint of a blush creep up his neck.

  Maybe we both needed the antidote.

  ...

  A pizza box sat on the table between Dallas and me in the store kitchen. It was almost midnight. We’d both been determined to finish the inventory tonight, and we’d done it.

  When he told me he needed to wrap it up tonight because he had a lot of other commitments, I pasted a fake smile on my face and told him I understood, even as I wondered if his commitments involved dating Kylie.

  We didn’t talk much, instead focusing on our food. Dallas drained his soda can and wiped his mouth with a napkin. I half-expected him to belch. Toff would’ve. But Dallas wasn’t Toff.

  “So you can start your mobile book service now,” Dallas said.

  “Yeah, I’m looking forward to it.” I didn’t tell him that I’d wanted him to help me with it, that I’d imagined us choosing books together, laughing at the selections made by the sweet little old ladies.

  Dallas closed the lid of the empty pizza box. I couldn’t believe how much food he could eat and stay so fit. Maybe he ran marathons in his spare time.

  “Can I ask you something?” He spun the empty soda can between his hands.

  I shifted uncomfortably, hitching my leg under my thigh. “Depends. Are you going to make fun of my blog again?”

  He smiled down at the table. “No, I wouldn’t do that.”

  “Ha. You already have.”

  “Okay, so maybe I did a little bit.” He fiddled with a package of unopened red pepper flakes. “It’s hard not to tease someone who likes reading about hot aliens.” He glanced up, flashing his dimple.

  “Please, please stop reading my blog,” I begged, my cheeks burning.

  “What’s the verdict on the first kiss quiz?” he persisted. “Tongue or no tongue?”

  Despite my complete and total humiliation, I entertained a brief fantasy of straddling his lap, ripping his glasses off his face and…tongue. Definitely tongue.

  I needed to switch to reading murder mysteries. Gruesome, violent ones with no romance.

  “So did you have a real question for me?” I asked, hoping to steer us back to neutral territory.

  He tugged at his spiky hair, then pushed his glasses up his nose. Two signs he was nervous. Which meant I should be, too. “Well, this…uh…replacement crush mission. I’m still trying to understand your illogical logic. It doesn’t make sense, for someone like you.”

  My stomach clenched. “What do you mean someone like me?”

  He cleared his throat. “Someone so smart. Funny.” He shrugged, then locked his eyes on mine. “Someone so pr—so, uh, popular.”

  Had he almost called me pretty? My pulse pounded in my ears.

  “You think I’m popular?”

  He shrugged. “You know everyone. You have lots of friends. People like you.”

  I narrowed my eyes suspiciously. “Are you stalking me, Dallas Lang?”

  “Hardly.”

  Ouch. I winced and started fiddling with my own empty soda can.

  “I’m not a stalker,” he said. “I’m an observer.”

  I snorted. “Same diff. Just semantics.”

  He shook his head. “Big difference. Stalkers are obsessed. No objectivity whatsoever.”

  “Oh, so you’re an objective observer now? A scientist of human behavior? And you’re giving me a hard time for being a Vulcan?”

  His lips quirked. “I’m not a Vulcan. I’m more of a…McNerdist, if you will.”

  I giggled, flustered by the way his eyes lit up while I laughed. “All right, Mr. McNerdist. What does your scientific observation tell you?”

  He rocked back on the kitchen chair, balancing carefully on two chair legs. Hiddles readjusted himself, anchoring his claws into Dallas’s jeans.

  “We’ve already established that you’re definitely not a Vulcan,” he finally said. “At all. But you’re trying to be.” He hesitated, his eyes hooded. “Because someone hurt you. Jake, I assume.”

  Suddenly the room felt too small, and the silence roared too loudly in my ears. It wasn’t exactly shocking that he’d figured it out. But now I realized just how much he’d observed.

  “So what?” I hoped my sarcasm hid my anxiety.

  “So attacking this…boyfriend hunt or whatever like it’s a game of Battlefield, trying to sink an enemy and capture a prize you don’t even want…it’s stupid.” He took a breath and returned the chair’s weight to all four legs. “Because even missions with good intentions cause collateral damage and people get hurt.” He paused again, then plunged ahead. “You don’t seem like the kind of person who’d hurt someone intentionally. But I think you will, if you haven’t already.”

  My breath escaped in a startled gasp. I jumped up from my chair and grabbed the pizza box. I had to get away. I was completely freaked out at how he’d somehow seen into my heart. How he saw parts of me I was trying to keep hidden.

  But accusing me of hurting people? I hadn’t done that. Drew didn’t like me and neither did Henry. So far my mission was a failure, but I’d only hurt myself.

  “Vivian. Wait.”

  I didn’t stop when he called after me. I rush
ed down the deck stairs and tossed the pizza box into a trash bin, slamming the slid. Breathing heavily, I moved out of the glow of the porch light on the deck, leaning against a wall shadowed in darkness. The damp night air made me shiver, and I wrapped my arms around my body, wondering what it would feel like to have Dallas wrap his arms around me.

  “Vivian.” His voice was soft, hesitant, reaching me before his shadow loomed over me.

  “What?” I pressed against the wall, wishing I’d disappear through it into Narnia.

  “I’m sorry.” He stepped closer, and his low voice sent shivers racing up my trembling body. “I didn’t mean to upset you.”

  I shrugged, unable to speak or look into his eyes, half-hoping and half-dreading what I might see there.

  “You’re cold,” he said, stepping closer. Much too close.

  “And you said you weren’t a stalker.” I tried to joke but my voice trembled as much as my body did.

  He moved closer, just inches from me. The heat radiated between us like our own private sun.

  “Just observing,” he said, and before I could take another breath, he pulled me into his arms, pressing me against his body. My hands splayed against his chest and I felt the rapid beating of his heart underneath my palm.

  Mayday! Mayday! My hormones jumped ship, crashing into the sea of desire that rushed through me. He tilted my chin up, making my breath catch as my eyes met his.

  “You’re sure you aren’t interested in chemistry? Not even as bonus criteria?” His voice was low and sexy.

  “I’m s-sure,” I barely stammered out the words before his lips claimed mine.

  His kiss was gentle at first, soft and warm. I thought about resisting, pushing him away. I knew he’d never force me. But I wanted this kiss more than I’d ever wanted Jake’s. So instead of resisting, I leaned into him, reaching up to wrap my hands around his neck. I didn’t try to hide my desire for him; instead I matched his hunger with my own.

  My body felt like a firecracker shooting into the sky, exploding into a million electric sparks, as I finally gave in to the feelings I’d tried to hide, allowing my hormones free rein. Dallas pushed me against the wall. I hoped the building was strong enough to support us because it felt as if we’d just exploded a supernova. Our kiss deepened as he moved his hands up the length of my body, into my hair, tugging his fingers through it. My legs no longer felt solid and he seemed to sense it, dropping his hands from my hair to encircle my waist, crushing me against him, teasing my mouth open with his tongue.

  Kissing Jake had been hot, but kissing Dallas was a volcanic explosion. I melted into him, letting my inner Kirk beat the crap out of my inner Spock.

  I finally let my fingers touch his hair, running my hands through it. It was soft, just like I’d hoped. He groaned into my mouth, pressing himself even tighter against me, pinning me against the wall like a trapped butterfly. I shoved his glasses onto the top of his head, capturing his face between my hands.

  Then, as quickly as it started, it was over. Dallas jerked away from me, breathing raggedly. Cold rushed into the space between us, and I reached out my hand, wanting to pull him close again. He stepped back, lowering his glasses onto his nose.

  “Wh-what?” I whispered. I felt like he’d slapped me.

  “Don’t do this unless you mean it,” he said, his voice rough, his eyes glittering down at me. “I know this isn’t on your list.” I could still feel the heat emanating from him.

  I leaned against the wall for support. “What list?”

  He chuckled softly. “Your criteria list, Vivian.” He took a long breath to compose himself. “No chemistry, remember? No zing or whatever the hell you and your friends call it. But we definitely have it, so I guess that means I’ll never be on your list.”

  He hadn’t sworn around me before. My own breath came in uneven gasps. I’d never been kissed like that. Ever. He crossed his arms, looking down at me. “Or have you changed your mind? Are you ready to give up your stupid mission now?”

  Had I changed my mind? My God, if that kiss didn’t do it, nothing could.

  But wasn’t this exactly what I wanted to avoid? Amazingly hot kisses that made me lose control and possibly lose my heart? I wasn’t sure if I could handle that again. Not after Jake.

  “I…I’m not sure…of anything right now.” I could hardly think straight. I needed time to process what had just happened. I liked Dallas so much, but I was still reeling from what Jake had done to me. Could I really afford to let another person have control of my heart? Could I risk it?

  He stepped back as if I’d slapped him. “So you’re going to pretend this isn’t what you want? You’re going to keep playing Vulcan and deny your feelings for me?”

  “I…I don’t know, Dallas. I’m…not sure what I feel…what I can handle.”

  His laughter was sharp, tinged with a bitterness that made me shudder. “Well, that sucks.” He tilted his head back, looking up at the stars, the same stars I thought I was soaring through while we kissed. He closed his eyes and sighed heavily. “I think it’s obvious how I feel about you, Viv. But I’m not going to wait around for you to decide how you feel about me. If you want to stick to your stupid mission, just leave me out of it. Not like I was ever one of your targets, anyway.”

  He turned away, disappearing quickly into the shadows. I closed my eyes, leaning against the wall, unshed tears burning my eyes.

  Viv. He’d finally called me Viv.

  I heard his Vespa hum to life, then the sound faded as he drove away, out of my life, but not out of my heart.

  “Mind your own business, Mister Spock. I’m sick of your half-breed interference-do you hear?”

  —Captain Kirk

  CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

  It was like Dallas and I didn’t know each other anymore. He never caught my eye in the halls at school, or texted me, or stopped by my lunch table to make some random McNerd observation. He and Toff, however, seemed to be bonding. I’d heard from Jaz that Toff was teaching Dallas to surf and he was supposedly a natural at it.

  Of course he was. I remembered my joke about life being a corny movie where the new guy comes to town and sweeps all the surfing competitions. If we’d still been friends…or more than friends…I could’ve teased him about it.

  Toff and his dad still showed up for dinner once a week, but things weren’t the same between Toff and me. He was full of unspoken questions and I didn’t have any answers. My mom asked me if we’d had a fight. I told her no, we were just drifting apart, earning me a lecture about the importance of maintaining friendships, especially those I’d had since forever.

  Amy and Jaz stopped telling me that my RC mission was a bad idea. Instead, they nodded like brainless zombies when I tossed out potential target names. Names I didn’t even care about. I missed Jaz’s feisty arguments and Amy’s speeches about true love, but they’d apparently made a secret pact to tolerate me like the crazy cat lady everyone felt sorry for.

  So far, the RC mission had tanked. Iggy suggested I give Henry another chance, since he was kind of a McNerd, though not nearly as appealing as Dallas. Even though I didn’t want to, I’d gone to a movie with him; but when he tried to kiss me, I turned away. I was pretty sure no one would ever come close to kissing me the way Dallas had. My hormones had been so bored they hadn’t even woken up when Henry made his move.

  But that wasn’t the worst part. When we’d left the theater, we’d seen Dallas and Kylie in the lobby, holding hands and laughing. Unlike me, he hadn’t looked as if he was there under duress. My heart felt as if it splintered into a million tiny pieces while I watched them together. I was hurt and surprised that someone who’d put so much passion into our kiss and had said what he had about his feelings for me, had apparently moved on so quickly.

  Dallas glanced my way as I trailed Henry across the lobby. He’d stopped laughing, his eyes latching onto mine. He’d untangled his hand from Kylie’s and for several deranged seconds, I thought he might cross the lobby to swoop
me into his arms. But instead he’d just turned away, his face reminding me of the night he’d stormed out of the store on his mysterious errand, full of intensity and frustration.

  The only activities keeping me sane were boring homework, my review blog, and the senior center book delivery service. Maybe it was pathetic that the highlight of my week was wheeling an overflowing cart of books into the stale-smelling lobby of the senior center, but at least when I was there I forgot about my stupid boy problems.

  ...

  It was a quiet afternoon at Murder by the Sea when the door swung open and I glanced up to see the Unabomber slinking into the store, hiding under a grey hoodie pulled low over his forehead and oversized dark sunglasses. He glanced around the store, then spotted me. As he moved quickly toward me, I realized who it was.

  “Hey,” he whispered. “Gran’s out of crack. Can you hook me up?”

  I stifled a giggle. “Go through that door.” I pointed to the “Employees Only” door to the kitchen. “I’ll be right there.” I hesitated. “There’s soda in the fridge, if you want. Cookies on the counter.”

  He shot me a quick grin before striding quickly toward the kitchen. I glanced around the store. No one had noticed him or looked ready to buy anything, so I put our small bell on the counter and the worn sign that said, “Ring for service,” then followed Fisk into the kitchen.

  He sat at the table drinking a soda and eating from the package of cookies. He’d pushed the hoodie off his face and removed his sunglasses. Dang. No wonder Hollywood wanted him on the big screen.

  I was dying to snap a photo of him for Jaz, but I knew I couldn’t. Maybe someday I’d tell her about this. Then again, maybe not, since she’d kill me for keeping it a secret.

  “How’s it going, Vivian? Keeping the senior center supplied with granny porn?” He grinned at me.

  “It’s not porn!” I took a cookie from the package as I sat down across from him. “And I guess I’m not doing a good job with the supply if you’re here.”