Free Falling (Fighting Free Series Book 3)
Page 20
“You should have. You needed to put me out of my misery, you see, there is a girl that I can’t get out of my mind. She is the first thing I think of in the morning and the last thing on my mind at night. She is beautiful, absolutely gorgeous to look at, but even more beautiful on the inside. She makes me want to be a better person. She makes me strive for things I never dreamt I’d want. I miss her laughter – it’s the best sound in the whole world – well… that and the way that she moans my name.” He grinned wickedly at me, and my stomach did a somersault. I prayed to every god I knew that he was talking about me. “I miss her smile because it lights up my entire day; I miss her touch; I miss the way she can’t cook for shit and burns all my pots and pans; I miss the smallest shorts I’ve ever seen in my life, my most favourite of her clothing; I miss every damn thing about her; and it’s driving me crazy. I don’t want to be a distraction, because, to me, she is everything. So…I need to know how she feels.”
He still stood in the doorway, looking down at me, his face open and vulnerable but completely at ease with himself, and I smiled.
“She’s in love. She loves a man whom she wakes up with every morning and falls asleep with every night even though he’s only in her memories. She loves a man who sees her flaws and loves her regardless - despite them and because of them. She loves a man who made her pancakes because he cares enough to listen and hear her. She loves a man who promised to make her the centre of his world and showed her with his actions that he meant it. She loves the man who makes her laugh and smile. She loves that man so much because, even when she was too scared to believe in him, he believed enough in both of them to keep trying. He made her believe in love and fairy tales again,” Tears rolled down my face, and I felt him move forward and wipe his thumb across my cheeks.
“And she wasn’t even looking for a prince,”
“But she found one anyway.” I answered.
I became aware of the sensation of someone standing over me just as I felt the pressure around my neck, immediately pulling me back to consciousness. I let out an almost inaudible squeak as hands pressed down on my windpipe, cutting off my ability to speak. Just as I raised my hands, the grip was released, and I heard Marcus, his voice gruff with sleep, “Woah, easy there, little guy! You can’t squeeze mummy that hard. Give her a big, sloppy kiss to say sorry.”
I turned to look at the smiling face of our baby boy being held in an embrace by his daddy. I smiled at them, and he lunged for me, giggling happily and slobbering all over me.
“Soreee, Mummeeee” he squealed, as I tickled him.
The moment was cut short as he began to yell in an excited, piercing tone, “Wee-wee! Wee-wee!” as he cupped himself and scrunched his face up in a mask of concentration.
“Ok! Ok! I’ve got you! Come and show daddy what a big, clever boy you are!” Marcus’ voice was filled with just as much excitement, and I felt my heart soar as I watched him scoop his son up in his arms and race with him to the bathroom.
I lay back against the pillow, smiling widely as I heard the sounds of praise and laughter. I heard the toilet flush, and they both appeared, our little boy, Josh, matching his daddy’s smug shit-eating grin as he stood proud as punch in the doorway.
“I wee-weed like daddeee!”
“You sure did, J-man! Now that you’re a big boy, how about helping me make your mummy breakfast this morning? Josh nodded enthusiastically, and Marcus took his hand, leading him downstairs and giving me a wink as he left.
I sank down into the duvet and thought about how much my life had changed over the last few years. Things hadn’t always been easy with us, but they’d always felt right. There’d been times when we’d allowed the damage caused by the past to hurt us again, but we’d always managed to come through it, stronger and more determined than before. Marcus had stood beside me when I’d needed someone, helped me as I’d faltered and held onto me as I’d pushed, and, in return, I’d shown him that love could heal, that love didn’t come with a price or an agenda, and that he deserved to be happy and loved.
I heard their footsteps and muffled voices as they walked back towards the bedroom, and I pulled myself upright to lean against the headboard.
“Look, Mummee!” Josh burst into the room, his arms spread and his eyes wide with delight.
“Wow! This is a feast! I don’t think I can eat it all. Do you think my two favourite boys could help me?”
Josh dived onto the bed, and I instinctively moved my hand to protect myself. He patted the bed, “An’ yooo, Daddee!”
“Shift over then! Goodness – you’re getting bigger and taking up all the room! What do you think, Mummy? Is it time for a new big bed since he’s a big boy now?” Marcus sat on the bed in front of me, balancing the tray on his lap.
Josh’s face lit up, and he looked to me for confirmation. Marcus and I had discussed changing him from his cot into a “big boy” bed as a reward once he’d mastered the ‘big boy toilet’.
“Hmm! Well…you are pretty big now…” I looked thoughtfully at Josh, pretending to size him up as he nodded wildly.
“I am, I am, See!” He stretched himself as far as he could and gestured from his head to his toes, making me crack up laughing.
“OK! I suppose we’d better get you a big bed since you’ve grown so much. How about it if we keep your cot for when you have a baby brother or sister to look after? How would you like to be a big brother?”
He stopped what he was doing and turned to me, his little mouth hanging open. “I be a big bruthaa?” His voice was so full of awe that I felt my heart actually ache with the weight of my love.
“Not yet, Josh, one day though, hopefully.” Marcus said quickly, with a quick, reassuring smile as Josh’s face started to fall.
I moved my hand over my still flat stomach and smiled. “You’ve got to wait for the baby to be big enough to be born, Josh, and it gives you time to grow even more to be a big brother.”
“I am big,” he pouted. I caught movement as Marcus turned back to look at me, but I kept my gaze on Josh, part of me afraid to see Marcus’ reaction. “Josh, you are big, but think how much bigger you’ll be after Christmas, and you’ll be able to show the baby all your new toys.”
He pondered this for a moment before breaking into a smile again. “Otay, I be growed reeely big.”
I heard Marcus chuckle and risked a quick glance at him, but his gaze was fixed on the bedding. He spoke without looking up, “Hey, Josh, why don’t you go into your room and say goodbye to your cot and you can help me take it apart later?”
“Otay!” Josh whooped, jumping off the bed and racing out of the room.
Marcus had now raised his head and was looking directly at me. He’d found the news of Josh’s pregnancy hard to take. His parents had left him with a poor example of parenting, and he feared failing his child and me, fears that had proved unfounded as he was an amazing father and husband - but things had been difficult for a time. I swallowed as I stared at him, searching his eyes for signs of regret, worry or distress. He reached forward and pulled the duvet away from me, lifting my top so that he could see my still flat stomach.
“How long?” he asked, his voice soft.
“I think I’m about 6 weeks or so. I found out last night. I did a test because I’d been feeling so tired and achy and then I could smell oranges…and I know how weird that is…but last time…” I was rambling, and he silenced me with a soft kiss to my lips. I felt myself melt forward into his embrace as he pulled me into him. I wrapped my legs around him as he sat me on his lap. “Thank you.” His voice rasped, thick with emotion, and I felt tears sting my eyes.
“You don’t ever need to thank me - You’ve made me the happiest girl in the world - You made me believe in fairy tales again and I get to live my own every single day.”
He pulled back to look at me, wiping his thumb over my lower lashes to catch the moisture that was at risk of falling.
“And you’re my happy-ever-after.” With his hand sti
ll cradling my face, he kissed me long, hard and deep, stealing my breath, making my heart pound and my whole body heat up - just as giggling brought us back to reality with a bump. We broke apart, and both of us turned to look at the little boy who stood in the doorway. Josh’s small face was scrunched up in disgust as he announced loudly, “Ewww!” He turned and raced back into his bedroom, laughing hysterically as he ran.
Marcus smirked at me. “I hope they’re all as crazy and perfect as him.”
“All?” I raised an eyebrow as he grinned at me.
“Yep, baby - each and every one.”
As always, a huge thank you to my family, your love and support means everything to me.
My alpha and beta readers – thank you for helping me to polish my story, for talking me down from the ledge and making me smile: big. Love you guys. Amo, Sarah, Kellie, Yvonne, Gina.
There are so many people that have supported and championed me. You really mean the world to me and I want you know how grateful and honoured I am to have you in my corner.
Misti, Amie, Liran, Danielle, Kristine, Susan, Sharon, Emma, Kim.
I could write another book listing the amazing book friends that I’ve made – thank you all. Xxx
To every single blogger that has helped me along the way – THANK YOU. I know how hard you work and I think you’re all amazing. I’m so grateful for all that you do.
To every reader that’s taken a chance on me – thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Jessica Simpson – Remember That
One Direction – Happily
Marlisa – Stand By You
Adele – Remedy
Shawn Mendes – Treat You Better
Jamelia – Thank You
Jess Glynne – Take Me Home
James Durbin – Parachute
My Favourite Highway – Bigger Than Love
Green River Ordinance – Endlessly
James Arthur – Say You Won’t Let Go
Ed Sheeran – Lego House
Bruno Mars – Just The Way You Are
Available on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/user/116259075/playlist/33gvx6tq11TAPvbG44DnQu
Table of Contents
More From GL Chapple
Dedication
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Epilogue
Acknowledgements
Free Falling - Song Playlist