I roll my eyes, thinking Mom is either going to profess her love to him now, or make him wait a few more days.
“I think he should be eating more. Any tips on his favorite foods?”
I loudly groan this time, moving away from Harvey and out of the bedroom. I collapse on his comfy couch and flip the TV on, uninterested in everything I see.
I never watch TV. I don’t have time, and I have never bothered to invest effort or care into it. Now I feel out of touch with everything I see.
Who are these people, and why is there so much reality on?
Harvey comes out to give me my phone back as his own cell rings.
“Mom?” I say, and she sighs happily.
“Have I told you that I love him?”
“Yes, and I’m fairly certain he doesn’t swing that way, Mom. Focus on Marty.”
“Real smart ass you are. You still happy?”
I take a deep breath. I am anything but happy after what I saw, but I don’t want Mom to know about that. Anyway, truthfully, I am happy with Harvey, even if guilt eats away at me over the danger he’s in because of me.
“Yep.”
“Then that is all I need to hear. Marty is taking me on a day cruise tomorrow, so I’ll speak to you soon.”
“Have fun, Mom.”
“I will!” I hear the smile in her voice, glad she sounds so carefree. She deserves to be happy after being stuck in a miserable marriage for so long.
“Love you.”
“Love you, too,” she says before hanging up.
I stare at my phone a while longer before Harvey sinks down next to me.
“Everything okay?” he asks quietly.
“Yeah, she’s happy.” I give him a small smile.
He rests his hand on my thigh. “That’s good. I don’t know how she managed to stay married to your father for so long.”
“Me neither. What was your call about?”
“Got a lead. Gonna meet Declan to check it out.”
I don’t know if this has to do with my case, or something else, but I’m too emotionally exhausted to ask.
Plus, just the mention of Declan reminds me that the last time I saw him, he was in a fist fight with Harvey because of me. We should probably get that discussion over with.
“Harvey, about yesterday …” I gulp, almost backing out. “I’m sorry I acted that way.”
“Don’t apologize,” he says quickly, squeezing my thigh briefly. “I never should have brought you with me to Zander’s. I wasn’t thinking. I just needed to do something. I needed to talk to the guys so they could see in my eyes I needed this done now.”
“But I made you guys fight and—”
“You didn’t do anything. That fight was a long time coming.”
“What do you mean?”
“We, well, we clash sometimes. I get the feeling Declan doesn’t like me much, or maybe doesn’t approve of me.”
“What? That’s not true,” I quickly deny. Is that truly what Harvey thinks?
“Nix.” He sounds exasperated. “You’ve only really met him once.”
“I know, but after he saw Donny in my office, he stepped in. Then he made sure I knew he wasn’t keeping it from you. I had until Christmas lunch to tell you before he did.”
Harvey appears surprised to hear this. “He’s always been standoffish with me. I thought … I don’t know.”
“Pretty sure the girls have mentioned that you’re standoffish with them, and they love you.”
“I’m not standoffish with them,” he denies. I see he doesn’t truly believe that.
I raise my eyebrow at him, and he shakes his head at me.
“Fine, I’m not exactly an open book, but that doesn’t mean anything. I’m best friends with Teagan!”
“Having met Teagan, and all those women, I doubt you had a lot of choice in that.”
“That’s …” The denial dies on his lips, even as an affectionate smile takes over. “… not entirely untrue.”
“Exactly. And I guess Declan shows his affection differently, too. He had good things to say about you, Harvey. It’s time you start giving those guys a break.”
He seems to mull over my words, but soon he just gives me a small shrug. “Things are okay between me and Declan. I think I like him now.”
I scoff. “Seriously? Because you both tried to beat each other up? Now that is some macho crap right there. Did you beat your chests at each other after I left?”
“No, we kept going at each other until Sasha pointed out that, while we were measuring our dicks, maybe we could take some time to notice you and Ava were missing.”
I laugh at that, liking Sasha a little more each time I see or hear her. “Then, why are you guys okay now?”
“Because he was standing up for you. I couldn’t see I was upsetting you, and after what happened, well, I couldn’t bring myself to let you go. I wanted you at my side so I could feel you and know you were okay.”
I glance down at my lap, feeling guilty again at the mess I created. “I’m sorry. It wasn’t about you touching me. It’s just, well, I kept seeing Lola.” My voice breaks on her name, but I keep going. “I kept hearing Donny say you were a dead man walking, seeing those words that you were next, and that stupid memory of my dream where you were dead.” I wipe my hands over my face, wishing it would be enough to wipe all that away, but it’s never that easy.
Instead of answering me, Harvey pulls my hands away and pinches my chin until I’m looking at him. Then he kisses me lightly, shifting his arms around me before pinning me to the couch in one move, placing his body deliciously on top of mine.
I roam my hands over him before slipping under his shirt and touching his skin, which feels hotter. Our kiss grows in intensity until I’m positive every thought in my head shuts off. It’s an addicting feeling to think about touch and nothing else.
I shift my hips so our crotches rub against each other, the powerful and consuming feelings building inside me.
Is this the way it’s always going to be between us? Or is it because of the intense situation we are trapped in that everything feels heightened?
“Shit,” he gasps, pulling away from me. “I need to go,” he mutters. Despite his words, he glides his hips against mine, our erections rubbing together through our clothes. I know he’s just as desperate to get off as I am.
I lean up to kiss him again, and that is all it takes to reignite the fire between us.
I pull his shirt up, breaking our kiss to remove it. I’m still shirtless, so our bare chests rub, the small hairs over him tickling my own bare skin.
He shifts his hands down between the couch and me to cup my ass, dragging me harder against him until we both break our kiss to groan.
“Fuck, you’re killing me here,” he moans, leaning forward to give me another kiss, but it’s short-lived since my phone begins blaring again from the coffee table.
I don’t want to stop, and Harvey growls like he’s not happy about the interruption, either. Still, he leans back and looks at my call.
His body tensing is enough to know who it is.
“Fuck!” I snap. Panic, dread, and fear settle inside me, chasing away any lingering feelings of desire or peace I was just wrapped in.
I sit up and hold my hand out to Harvey, resigning myself to doing this. I have no choice.
“No fucking way,” Harvey snaps, gripping my ringing phone. “You’re not being alone with him again. I won’t allow it.” He shakes his head.
“What choice do I have?”
“You can choose to not fucking answer,” he snaps, holding my phone out of reach when I make a move to get to it. Each ring is like a nail scratching down a chalkboard.
“But—”
“No, no buts or exceptions. He fucked up, he took things to the level he did, and you’re out.” Harvey stands now, moving several steps away from me with my phone still in his hand.
“Harvey,” I sigh.
He shakes his head and swipes m
y phone to end the call.
It starts ringing again almost immediately, the unknown number sprawled across my screen seeming sinister now.
I will never look at another unknown number the same.
“I’m getting you a new fucking phone,” he grumbles, moving back into the kitchen and away from me.
I follow him with my eyes, but all he does is drop it onto the kitchen counter.
He may want to throw the phone against the wall, and I do, too. However, that’s a huge step, and maybe part of him is worried about the consequences. Fuck, I’m freaking out about the consequences.
“Nix, I’m leaving this with you in case I need to get in contact with you, but I want your word that you will only answer for someone you know.”
I stare at him for a moment, taking in his shirtless state and disheveled hair. It’s a reminder of how close we just were, and how quickly that changed.
“Are you sure this is the right play?”
“Yes.” He sounds confident, but I’m not convinced. “Promise me,” he demands, perhaps reading my hesitation.
I stand up from the couch, adjusting my pants and my now dying boner as I make my way to Harvey.
He reaches out as soon as I’m within distance of him, pulling me to his chest before turning and trapping me against the counter.
“Nix, promise me.” He cages me in, leaning down and holding the counter on either side of me. His eyes penetrate mine. I’m positive Harvey can read every thought standing this close to me.
“I’m worried about what will happen to you, or the others, if I ignore his calls. He’s shown he’s not stable. I can’t …” My voice cracks. I clear my throat and attempt to finish what I’m trying to say. “I can’t have another life on my conscience.”
“Lola wasn’t your fault. What happened to her was the fault of only O’Neal. He’s an unstable murderer who has latched on to you. That is not your fault.”
“If Lola hadn’t been working for me, she would have been safe.”
“You can’t play that game, Nix. I could tell you, if she hadn’t been working for you, she would have gotten a job at a place where they didn’t care as much as you do about making sure their employees never left alone at night. Something could have happened to her then. Or, if you didn’t put her on the shifts you did, then maybe she would have been out somewhere and hit by a bus on that night off. You can’t do that game. It leads to an endless road of possibilities. You didn’t make this happen to her. This is all on O’Neal.”
“But—”
“No, no buts. And you have to stop blaming yourself for what he threatens you about me. I am in a profession that doesn’t make me many friends. I have been threatened before, and I’m sure I will be threatened again.”
“That doesn’t make me feel better,” I mutter.
“Fine. Do you know what will make me feel better?”
“What?”
“If you promise to ignore all calls from O’Neal. He’s going to do whatever he’s going to do, regardless of you following orders. He’s proven he’s not safe to be around. We will find him, and we will use what we discover against him. You’ve done what was asked of you, and now you’re done. Got it?”
“I’ve been to one meeting for Dad, and one I wasn’t even needed to go to. I hardly think I’ve done what I was supposed to do.”
“O’Neal changed the rules. That’s on him. Now, are you going to promise me this, or do I need to tie you up?”
I roll my eyes, especially since I can tell from the flash of excitement, plus the cocky smirk that graces his lips, that he likes the idea of tying me up a hell of a lot.
“Okay, fine, I’ll ignore his calls.”
I admit I’m not exactly jumping at the chance to speak to him, even if I’m not sure this is the right way to go about this. My promise makes Harvey happy, though, judging by the kiss he gives me as a reward.
Unfortunately, my reward doesn’t last long enough for my liking.
“I’ll be an hour or so, and then we’ll head to the police station together. I don’t want you to leave my apartment. O’Neal doesn’t know where you are, and I want to keep it that way.”
I nod, saddened when he takes a step back and I’m freed from his hold.
I watch him leave the kitchen, following him with my gaze until my feet take over and I’m standing in the doorway of his bedroom so I don’t lose track of him.
When he shucks off his pants, moving to put on something more appropriate for outside, I admire his strong thighs as he bends over, as well as his nicely rounded ass. When he’s standing in jeans, I gaze over his bare back, loving the way his muscles protrude from the sides of his arms to his back muscles. However, nothing is as delicious as when he turns around to face me, buttoning up a shirt and giving me only a glance of his abs before they are hidden from my view.
“Enjoying the show?” he asks with a smirk.
“As I recall, you watched me change.” I move inside the room to sit on his bed.
“Yes, it took every inch of control I had not to jump you.”
“Really? You seemed pretty in control to me.” Though, I guess even being in my room, in my bed, when he was trying to tell me he wanted to keep what we had between us professional, proves how out of control he truly was.
“Trust me, I wasn’t. And if I don’t leave now, I will be inside you for hours proving it to you.”
A hot shiver rolls over my body. Why does everything feel like a tease with Harvey?
“Now, that is something I can get behind.”
“Later,” he promises, leaning down to give me a too brief kiss before he makes his way out of the apartment, leaving me alone and with nothing to do except watch TV or nap.
It feels like one of the longest hours of my life. Thankfully, my phone remains silent the entire time.
***
By the time I’m finished making an official police statement, I am exhausted. I mention Donny, but I don’t have any proof that he is the one who killed Lola. A message sent from an unknown number doesn’t prove anything, even with the conversation I repeat to them from the night before the murder.
I feel emotionally drained when I finally get into Harvey’s SUV. Hearing my phone instantly ring makes me seriously consider throwing it out the window and living technology free.
“It’s Scarlett,” Harvey tells me softly.
I internally debate ignoring it. It will either be her harassing me about when we are going to reopen the restaurant, or her wanting to blather on about Cynthia.
She was upset to hear about Lola, though she never actually worked much with her. They had opposite shifts, and the few night shifts Scarlett did work were few and far between enough that they never became close.
I’m not in the mood for Scarlett, but unlike Donny and his two missed calls, Scarlett won’t stop calling until I answer.
“Hey,” I say after grabbing the phone from Harvey and answering it.
“The restaurant is on fire!” she shrieks down the line.
“What?” I say on an exhale, thinking I must have blacked out or fallen into some sort of dream world where I imagined what she just yelled at me.
“The fucking restaurant is on fire!” she screams into my ear. “There are fire crews here already, but Nix, it looks bad.”
My mouth drops open. I’m certain my heart doesn’t beat for so long I should be declared dead. I’m also sure I drop a dozen shades on the skin tone spectrum.
“Nix? Are you still with me?”
When Harvey takes the phone from me, she clearly repeats the news back to him, because he’s swearing and getting the car started.
Harvey drives us to the restaurant, not that we can park close to it.
I feel numb walking up to where the police have deemed a safe distance, as fire crews work on saving the building.
As flames far too powerful to be anything other than completely destroying billow out the front windows, I wonder if our neighbors will get out of
this unscathed.
“Fuck, he’s an asshole,” Harvey declares angrily.
I remain quiet, unsure how or what to feel. After Lola ended up dead, this just feels like a final straw.
I put my blood, sweat, and tears into my restaurant, and it all goes up in flames because Donny is angry with me? A woman is dead because I upset him? How the hell am I supposed to process this? How am I supposed to deal with any of this? My entire life feels like it’s being dismantled and stripped away from me, leaving me bare.
“Nix?” Harvey mutters, curling his arms around me as he stares worriedly at me.
“I …” I don’t know what to say.
As Harvey’s phone rings, I begin to hate all technology, as well as my stupid life.
“What?” he barks down the line. Then I watch numerous emotions flash over his face. I can’t imagine what he is hearing to bring so much out of him, but fury seems to be the one he’s focusing on. I don’t think I want to know what brought that on.
What else can go wrong today?
“You’re shitting me?” Harvey spits into the phone, and when his eyes find mine, I tense, waiting for the next bomb to drop.
“Fuck. Yeah, we’ll meet you in twenty,” Harvey says before hanging up.
“Do I even want to know?”
“The J.P.I. office was also badly burned. They managed to get the fire out. All the rooms were torched, but the damage isn’t as bad as …” His eyes move over to my restaurant.
I feel tears building just knowing how fucked it all is. Everything I worked for is gone.
“I’m so fucking sorry, Harvey,” I gasp, feeling overwhelmed again.
“No one was in the office. No one was hurt,” he assures me, caressing my face and wiping away a few stray tears.
I can just imagine how pissed off everyone is going to be with me. I just make a brilliant impression on everyone.
“Zander called a meeting at his place. Are you okay to come with me? I don’t want you alone right now.”
I don’t even know what I want to do. I should stay with the authorities here and try to sort out this new mess, but I feel done and need to shut off. It doesn’t matter where I do that—at Harvey’s or Zander’s. I’m just ready for this nightmare to end.
I Broke Into His Office (Love at First Crime Book 4) Page 20
