Stealing Grace

by Shelby Fallon

  “But I just want to put out that Roger and Alex were born into this, I mean...can they be punished for something that wasn’t their fault?” Elena asked clearly fighting tears at the thought of Alex being jailed after he’d come clean and risked himself to bring all this information forward.

  “Well, then their lawyer could say the same defense for all of those men. We aren’t going to give them anything to use against us, even if it may help.” He hesitated. “Do you mind if I ask you something? No offense to you, Alex, nor you, Roger, but...why are you here? And you?” he asked pointing to Elena and Amy. “I just need to know for my own understanding before I proceed with this case.”

  Elena answered first, making sure her voice was clear and strong.

  “You mean why am I with Alex still.” She looked at Alex and smiled. “I know it sounds crazy, but I knew from the beginning that something wasn’t right with him. Actions speak louder than words and he didn’t treat me like a prisoner or someone he had just kidnapped. He was very good to me, giving me space and the whole thing just seemed strange to me. And so when he told me his story about why he did what he did, I couldn’t help but be grateful for it. If he hadn’t done that, I would’ve wound up with someone else. Someone who wasn’t interested in saving me. I believe that this all happened for a reason, as everything does. I don’t have any regrets about what has happened. We saved four...five girls, and if that’s all that gets done out of all this, then I’m still grateful. It was still worth it to me, and...I love him.” Elena spoke and then felt sorry for Amy knowing her reasoning would be harder to relay than hers.

  “Roger is a different person. I don’t know what he’s told you but...it doesn’t even matter. I agree with Elena, this all wasn’t for nothing and I don’t have regrets either.” Amy was trying to compose her voice. Roger looked down at her hands on his the whole time she spoke. “Roger’s past doesn’t matter to me. When you forgive someone, you let go of all that. I’m here because of who he is, not who he was. I love him and I’m here to help, if I can. I’m just praying that everyone will see that none of this would’ve been possible if not for these two men. We wouldn’t be right here today, trying to help these women, if not for them.” Amy laid her head on Rogers shoulder, seeing the guilt all over his face.

  “Look, I know this is hard for everyone. Thank you all for being so honest with me. I too agree, all things happen for a reason.” He smirked at Elena then turned back to Alex. “Like I said, I doubt you two have anything to worry about legally, you’ll probably get leniency for your cooperation and testimonies, especially since you’re bringing it all to us in the first place. Now the law enforcement down there isn’t gonna be too happy about this either. Unfortunately, once all this gets underway, they might even decide to pay you a visit. I know you told me you’re being careful but if you see anything or hear anything out of the ordinary, especially around town, you let me know. For now, just lay low for a couple days and I’ll be in touch.” Agent Wright stood and thanked them for their time and Elena for the coffee. He started toward the door then stopped, turning toward them again he said firmly. “I’d like to see you two ladies outside - alone.”

  And then he turned and kept walking to the door. Elena and Amy looked at each other, then Alex and Roger. Alex nodded for Elena to go. He had a pretty good idea of what the agent wanted to ask them.

  Once outside and the door shut, Agent Wright walked them down to his car before speaking.

  “Ladies, I just want to make sure you know what you’re doing. I know it’s scary and I know you’ve been through an ordeal here. If you want to leave with me, right now, I will put you in this car and take you somewhere safe where they will never find you. Alex and Roger seem like nice guys and it’s great if they’ve reformed from that life. Look, I have no idea what you’re feeling right now, I won’t pretend to but, I’ve seen this before. Women won’t leave the men who beat them because their scared or love the men in some strange way, I don’t know. I just want you to know it’s safe if you want to leave with me. They would never find you, I promise you that.”

  They both knew what he was doing, and were so grateful to him for making an effort and not just taking their words for it inside. He really was worried about them. Elena spoke first.

  “Thank you, Mr. Wright. I can tell that you really care if we’re safe or not and I appreciate it. I’m speaking for myself here, but I’m ok, really. And I do love him and not because I feel like I have to or in some twisted Stockholm Syndrome way. Those men in there are wonderful. No one my whole life has treated me as well and he never held me against my will, he...he even offered to send me anywhere I wanted to go. I am not a prisoner, Mr. Wright, but I appreciate you making sure and for the offer.”

  “That goes for me as well. We are safe and happy on our own terms but thank you,” Amy spoke more clearly than Elena had ever heard.

  She knew she didn’t have any doubts.

  “Ok. Well,” he hesitated, “you’ll hear from me soon. Here’s my card. You can hide that in the bottom of a shoe in the closet, just in case. Put it in your pocket before you go inside.”

  He handed them each his card and climbed in his car, giving a small wave as he drove away. The girls looked at each other and hugged on the sidewalk before headed back inside. Everything seemed to be slipping right into place.

  “Everything ok?” Alex asked as they walked back inside.

  “Yeah, he was just trying to make sure we were...ok here,” Elena answered hugging Alex reassuringly, running her fingers through his hair, scratching with her nails down his neck and shoulders like she knew he loved to soothe him.

  “I figured,” he said with a stiff stifled laugh.

  “He’s a good man. I think he’ll work really hard on this. Don’t worry, he just wanted to make sure we were safe. It was a very gentlemanly thing to do. He doesn’t doubt you or Roger.”

  “Oh, I know. Well, I’m sure glad that part’s over. Now we just wait a couple days and see what pans out. Hmmm, what to do...cooped up in this new house with my beautiful wife for days. Hmmm,” he murmured into her throat, hugging her around the waist and kissing her neck making her giggle.

  They hadn’t been paying any attention to Roger or Amy.

  Roger was sitting in the chair, still looking down at the floor like it was extremely interesting, Amy sitting next to him. Elena glanced over and stopped laughing, Alex looked too. Amy had never told Elena the extent of abuse she had received from Roger, but considering he had slapped Elena on their first day of even meeting each other, she guessed it couldn’t have been great. He feels terrible. Then Amy spoke loudly, for everyone to hear.

  “Elena, did you know that Roger never actually hit me...never, the whole time we’ve been together, he has never hit me.”

  Alex and Elena looked at each other, trying to figure out why she was up to.

  “I did plenty else,” Roger almost shouted.

  He was extremely ashamed of himself, yelling more at himself than anyone else. He scrunched his face up in disgust as he spoke.

  “You have nothing to be ashamed of. Once you ask for forgiveness and it’s given, it’s as though it didn’t happen. I love you...and you can’t keep doing this to yourself every time the past is brought up. If I can let it go then why can’t you? You are not like the rest of them...” Amy said flustered and exasperated.

  * * *

  Alex listened and grimaced, remembering feeling this exact thing many times before; like he didn’t deserve Elena because of what he had done and not done. He let Elena’s waist go from his fingers and walked over to the couch to sit next to Roger, speaking slowly and meticulously so as not to further upset him.

  “Rog, did you know I bought Elena a bus ticket.” Roger looked up at him curiously with squinted surprised eyes. Amy looked at Elena and she nodded in confirmation. “I felt like you do right now, like...I didn’t deserve her. After all the stuff I put her through, I felt like a monster and it wasn’t fair to her
to be stuck with me even if she thought she loved me. So I bought the ticket and took her into town to make her leave a few weeks ago, but...she wouldn’t go. Everything happens for a reason.” He looked at Elena and winked with a sad smile on his face. “I’m telling you this because Agent Wright just took our wives outside and offered them a ride to somewhere far away and safe from us if they wanted it...and look. Roger, she’s sitting right next to you. It sucks, the way we grew up, and I’m not saying anything we did was ok, but we’re here now, and we’ve gotta let that stuff go, man. We need you, buddy. Amy needs you. She wouldn’t be here if she didn’t want to be. We just have to work with the hand we’re given.”

  Roger and Amy looked at each other. Roger’s eyes were red and he looked like he could burst into tears at any time. It hurt to watch him hurt so badly. He literally hated himself for what he’d done to her which they’d just learned, he hadn’t even hit her.

  Roger and Amy just stared silently at each other for the longest time, both of their eyes pleading with the others. Roger’s to be forgiven and Amy’s for him to realize he already was.

  Then Roger leaned over and grabbed Amy’s hands in his.

  “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, baby, I’m trying. I just can’t forgive myself for hurting you.”

  Roger leaned his face into Amy’s lap, her face streamed with tears, exasperated as to what to say to make his pain go away. Elena guessed that they had apparently had this conversation before. Alex’s hand was on Roger’s shoulder. He too looked as though there were no words to say.

  “Roger...do you want me to leave?” Amy croaked out.

  “No! I don’t, I just...” He couldn’t get his muffled words out and now Elena was starting to cry too, watching the emotional beating.

  “Well, if I stay...I need you. I need you to want to be with me and be able to forget the past.”

  He shot up too look at her.

  “Amy, I want you. This isn’t about wanting you or not.”

  “Yes, I know but that’s not enough. I’m really going to...need you, Roger,” Amy said as she put his face in her hands to look into his eyes. “Because...you’re going to be daddy,” she whispered but they all heard her with perfect clarity.

  Elena and Alex gasped as Roger stunned red face went completely still and his breathing was beyond gasping. He stared into her eyes and waited for something more. Her to say she was joking maybe, her to say she was just trying to shock him back into reality.

  Then she spoke again, letting the small slow tears run down her cheeks.

  “Say something. I mean...if I didn’t completely trust you and forgive you and love you, I would’ve left with Mr. Wright like Alex said. I wouldn’t be willing to have a baby with you. Say something.” She was breathing heavy, upset by his silence. “I know it wasn’t exactly the best timing to tell you, I just-”

  He interrupted her speech by picking her up in his arms, kissing her and twirling her around in the living room.

  “I’m gonna be a father? When?”

  He was positively glowing. Elena and Alex had never seen him happier. He could barely get his words out as he set her back down on the floor gently.

  “Well, I figure I’m about five or six weeks.”

  “But when? We’ve been careful…oh yeah, I remember, that one night,” Roger leaned down to whisper the rest in her ear.

  “Yeah.” She giggled and nodded to whatever he had said, agreeing. “I took a test when I was late. That would mean we’ve got about eight months... hopefully time enough for all this mess to be over with.”

  “How long have you known?” He put his hands over her belly. “Are you ok? Have you been sick? Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked as he framed her face with his big tan hands, caressing her cheeks with his thumbs.

  “I’ve only known a few days. I didn’t want it to interfere with any of our plans while we got the ball rolling. You needed to focus on what was important.”

  “You’re what’s important,” he said sweetly but firmly.

  Roger still had her face in his hands as they both smiled and he kissed her with a passion of someone that had just been given a second chance at life. She clung to his shirt as he kissed her fiercely.

  Alex walked back over to Elena, hugging her around the waist to give them some space. They were both smiling too. I can’t believe she didn’t tell me. Amy’s going to be a mom!

  When Roger and Amy finally lost some steam and slowed down, Alex walked over to shake Roger’s hand.

  “Guys, this is so great. I can’t believe it,” Alex started the congratulations.

  “Thanks,” Roger said, dazed and glassy eyed, “I can’t believe it myself.”

  Elena secretly did the math in her head and realized Amy had gotten pregnant right after Roger’s turn-around. She wondered what had happened before that; what Roger felt so bad about but was happy that the baby wouldn’t be a reminder of that time. He was conceived out of love.

  They all hugged and kissed and smiled and laughed and playfully berated Amy for not telling anyone. They didn’t want to think about anything else right now. They had done their part and now needed to just wait. Nothing could put a damper on tonight’s twilight.

  * * *

  The next couple of days everyone pampered and catered to Amy, which she hated and constantly rebuffed, telling everyone to stop immediately to which no one listened. She didn’t like being treated like she was breakable, but Roger was so elated, he wouldn’t hear a word of her protests.

  He was so happy and you couldn’t wipe the smile from his face. Elena was happy too for them, thinking it was a little too soon of course. Them having known each other only a few months and only really knowing each other a couple months, but happy known the less.

  Alex and Elena tried to give them some space. The house was pretty good sized and each couple had their own bedroom and bathroom so it wasn’t too hard but not knowing how long they’d be rooming together, they wanted to be a little spacious with each other.

  Sometimes they would watch a movie together after dinner but for the most part, each couple kept to themselves. Elena liked their bedroom, it was comfy and had a nice view of the street and neighborhood. Most of the neighbors had kids.

  They rode their bikes up and down the street and played basketball in their driveways. Made shapes and played games with chalk on the sidewalk. It was just like the movies. What she thought suburbia would always look like. Even if you couldn’t see the kids, you could hear them. Elena didn’t think that was a bad thing either.

  She liked kids, she assumed. Alex seemed to like kids as well or want them anyway. Elena hadn’t thought too much about kids before but now that the issue had come full circle to their little group, it seemed like every baby and child she saw was staring at her everywhere they went. She wondered what was wrong with her. She didn’t even have this ‘baby fever’ she’d heard so much about, but why couldn’t she stop thinking about them?

  After Elena and Alex cleaned up from dinner that night and had taken a shower, they relaxed together in their room. Alex had been complaining some about his shoulder hurting lately, which was weird, he never complained about anything, Elena thought.

  Once they were laying on the bed that night, she rolled him over, with no protests from him. She pulled his shirt off and began rubbing his arm and shoulder for him. He loved it that she wouldn’t ask him if he wanted a backrub. She just knew he did and just did it. And she liked taking care of him and making his feel better if she could.

  Alex, though enjoying his backrub, was always very perceptive.

  “You got something you wanna talk about, El? You’ve been kinda in your own world today.”

  “No, I’m fine. Just thinking about some things, nothing for you to worry about.”

  “Are you thinking about Amy and the baby?”

  Her hands stilled at his words.

  “Yeah, some. Why, have you?”

  “Yeah, I have. I been thinking I would love to be a dad s
omeday but, I’m just a little bit selfish of you right now. I’m not ready to share yet.”

  Elena chuckled and resumed her circular rub of her palms over his shoulder, surprised by her relief of his words.

  “I know what you mean. I’m not so sure about being a mom myself though. I mean...I wanna be but I just didn’t have a very good model ya know but, yeah...” She couldn’t think of the right thing to say. She didn’t want him to think she didn’t want kids but didn’t want him to think she did either. “I want to wait a little bit too.”

  “You are gonna make a great mom someday. I don’t doubt that at all. All right, your turn.” He pulled himself up and pushed her playfully on the bed. There was no need to pull up her tight camisole. He straddled her, rubbing his hands to warm them, then he started to massage her lower back first, loving her little groans and noises of contentment.

  “Mmmm, you’re really good at that...and the flattery,” Elena said trying to get the subject back.

  As much as she wanted to let the kid subject go, she wanted to know why he thought she would make a good mother.

  “I’m not flattering you, I’m serious. You were already the mother hen back at the community, and you do such a good job of taking care of me. Plus... I don’t think God would give someone a kid without also giving them the knowledge to care for it. I think it’s up to us to use that knowledge or not.”

  “I guess I agree with that.”

  “So you don’t need to worry about whether you’ll be good or not. It’s your choice to be good or not.”

  “Yeah, makes sense but, that makes me feel even worse about my own parents. I don’t know. So you believe in God then?”

  “I do now. There’s no way that all this happened, especially you being here with me, without a higher calling of some sort. You were sent to me, El. I know it, without a doubt.”

  She smiled into the pillow and chose her words carefully.

  “You want to, maybe, go to church on Sunday? Try it out?”