Crazy In Love With A Thug: Bari and Seven

by LaDonna Robinson

  I knew in my heart that I wanted Seven back, but this wasn’t the way to do it. We needed to talk. Or was the fact that we missed each other and still loved each other enough? We hadn’t seen each other in a month. For real, neither one of us knew what the other had done during that time.

  “Have you been with anybody, Seven?” I asked, running his hair through my fingers.

  “Hell naw,” he answered, then glared at me.

  I felt him tense up.

  “No, Seven.”

  He relaxed.

  “I know good and damn well you haven’t. A nigga will get killed fuckin’ with my Milkshake. I don’t care if we’re together or not.”

  I searched his face for a sign that he was joking. There was no such sign.

  “That’s not something you need to worry about anyway. I love you, Seven.”

  “I love you too, Baby.”

  He hugged me tightly. His lips had barely touched mine when my cell phone rang. I reached over and pulled it out of my purse.

  “Bari?”

  Heaven help me, I closed my eyes and prayed. My hands started to shake. It was Trim. I started to get off Seven’s lap. He held on to me.

  “Where the fuck you goin’? Who is that?”

  I acted like I didn’t hear him when we both knew good and well that I did.

  “Yes?” Even my voice was shaky.

  “There’s some girl looking for you, says she’s your sister.”

  “What? Where? Who is she?” I asked.

  “Who the fuck are you talkin’ to?” Seven demanded to know.

  I waited for Trim to answer.

  “Her name is ...hold on....Niecy.” Tears flooded my eyes. “I wrote it down.”

  “Where is she?” I asked. “Is she at your house? I’m coming home.”

  “She left, but she left a phone number for you.”

  I listened as he recited the number.

  “Whose damn phone number is that? And who the hell are you talking to?” Seven repeated.

  “Thank you so much, Trim.”

  “Trim!” Seven exploded. He almost dumped me onto the floor as he snatched the phone. I didn’t even care. He could have the damn thing. Something was wrong, and I had to find out what.

  “Nigga, you playin’ me a little too close,” Seven informed him. “I thought I was being nice by allowing you to continue breathing. Maybe I was wrong. And how the fuck did you get my baby’s number? Who? What? Damn. Where’d the bitch go?”

  “Seven! Don’t call her that,” I yelled and went to use Gucci’s house phone.

  “If she come back, tell the ho to stay the fuck away from my baby. That bitch is bad news. I’d hate for her to come up missin’ on her vacation and all. She can set off some shit if she wants to.”

  My hand froze on the phone. I looked at Seven. He looked calmly back at me and ended the call.

  “Seven, you need to stop that,” I said nervously.

  “I ain’t forgot what that bitch did to you, her and her crackhead ass mother. And I’m just saying, I ain’t havin’ no bullshit. If you ask me, you shouldn’t even call that tramp back.”

  “Seven, she’s my sister, and something isn’t right. I need to find out what it is.”

  “I can tell you what it is. The bitch needs some cheddar. Boudine finally realized that she can’t buy crack with food stamps and put her ho ass daughter on a plane to come find you. Fuck them bitches.”

  He saw the look on my face, came over to where I stood and dialed the number I had on the piece of paper.

  “Is this Niecy? This is Seven ...yeah, she’s right here. Not so fast...what the fuck you want with my baby ...And you came all the way to Cali to tell her that! Bitch, please . ..Take your ass back on the next thing smoking ...she don’t need to hear that shit.”

  “Seven, let me talk to her,” I said. “It’s okay.”

  “Hold on, bitch.” He held the phone in his hand but didn’t pass it to me. “If the bitch say something foul, you better play it off and not let me know about it.”

  He handed me the phone.

  “Niecy? What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing really. How have you been, Bari?”

  “Fine,” I said hesitantly. “What are you doing here?”

  “I came with Mama, but I was hoping we could talk while I’m here. I want to apologize to you.”

  “Like you did last time?” I asked sarcastically. “How did you get my address?”

  “It was on some papers that came from Daddy’s attorney yesterday.”

  An alarm went off inside my head. I was starting to get angry. She was lying, and I knew it.

  “What papers, Niecy?”

  “Just some papers that Daddy’s ex-wife sent to us.”

  My stomach did a somersault, then followed it up with a back flip worthy of an Olympic gold medal.

  “Marcie?” I asked, knowing good and damn well it wasn’t her.

  ‘’No, Trish.”

  “Where are you staying, Niecy?” I asked.

  I was pissed and didn’t try to hide it.

  “Well, we couldn’t get a motel, so we’re staying with Trish while we’re here.”

  “Yeah, birds of a feather and all that,” I said. “Anyway, let me remind you and your mother of one thing, tell her that man in the black bathrobe that carries a hammer, it’s called a judge, said that she is not to contact me. That means through you or any other way, and if she does, I’ll have her smoked out ass thrown in jail. And she don’t even want to see the inside of a California jail. Don’t caII me again, Niecy. I mean that.”

  “WeII, Trish said that on one of the papers it said that the money Daddy left is to be given to any living offspring that he may have.”

  I was fuming. Seven was watching me calmly.

  “Newsflash, bitch! You are not his offspring, his onspring or any other mutha fuckin’ spring you can think of. Let my father rest in peace, Niecy.” My voice started to crack, and tears came to my eyes. “I’m my father’s only child. You know that, and whatever game you and Trish and your mother are playing now, I don’t want no part of it.”

  “Barry raised me, whether you like it or not, Bari, and he was my father, too. Even Trish said ...”

  “I don’t give a fuck what Trish said!” I screamed. “Trish isn’t a lawyer. Trish can barely spell her own damn name!” Seven started laughing. “I don’t want to hear shit about Trish!”

  “Well, I don’t know what to tell you, ‘cause we ain’t givin’ up.”

  “Yeah bitch, and I ain’t either. So, if you and Smoky over there think I’m gonna pay you to leave me alone, you’re dead wrong.”

  “Bari, this is your mama. How you doin’, baby?”

  “Bitch, please. I do not want to talk to you. And don’t think for one minute that I won’t turn your ass in for violating that restraining order.”

  “I don’t want no problems, Bari.”

  “Then leave me alone and don’t call me anymore, don’t have Niecy call, don’t do shit.”

  I hung up the phone.

  “You mad?”

  “No, Seven.”

  “Don’t lie, baby. I told you them bitches ain’t no damn good.”

  “Seven.”

  “What, Milkshake?”

  “I want to come home, please.” I looked up into his eyes. “I need to be with you. I am so unhappy.” I wiped my eyes with the heel of my hand. “I miss you so much.”

  He held my face in his hands and kissed my lips.

  “I want you home more than anything in the world, Milkshake. I’ve been so fucked up inside. When, baby? Now? Tell me you’re coming home with me now.”

  He kissed me softly.

  “You have to let me talk to the manager first, Seven, out of respect, if nothing else.”

  “Don’t change your mind, Baby. I don’t want nothing about that place to change your mind.”

  “I already know what you’re thinking. I don’t want anybody but you. Trim can’t do shit for me.”


  “I don’t even want the nigga tryin’.”

  “You can’t get mad at somebody for trying, Seven, or even being attracted. You said that yourself. Remember?” I smiled, “Besides, I told you a long time ago that my milkshake brings all the boys to the yard.”

  He laughed a fake laugh.

  “Yeah, but a mutha fucka will get killed fuckin’ around in my yard.”

  “Will you stop talking about killing people? It makes me nervous.”

  “It should. That’s good for yo’ ass. You’ll never overstep your boundaries.”

  Chapter 44

  “So, you’re going back?” Trim asked as I walked back to my condo after talking to the manager the next day.

  Birdie had called this morning and asked if I could arrange for Mandro to take over my condo. I told her that he could have it furnished, and that he could discuss the rent with the manager. He would move in Wednesday, I would leave Monday. That gave me two days to get packed.

  “I’m going back, Trim.”

  “Good. If that’s where you’re gonna be happy, then that’s where you need to be.”

  “Thank you.”

  I unlocked the front door and stepped inside. I had packed a few small boxes this morning and was about to take them out to the Rover when I saw the manager and followed him back to his office. Trim stood outside the door.

  “You understand why I can’t invite you in, don’t you?”

  “I ain’t trippin’, Bari. I understand. Good luck to you.”

  “I hope I won’t need it,” I laughed. “You take care of yourself, Trim. You’ve been a good friend to me. I appreciate it.”

  I reached out and hugged him. I’m going to die, I thought to myself. I’m going to be killed and no one will ever find my body. How did this happen? I asked myself, and couldn’t come up with an answer. I didn’t know how Trim’s lips found mine. I don’t know how we made it from the threshold of my front door to the entry way, or how the door got closed.

  “Bari, baby, I’ve wanted you for so long,” he whispered against my lips then started kissing me again. I walked to the big picture window and pulled the string that closed the drapes. I grabbed Trim’s hand and was leading him up the stairs to my room, then before I knew it, was pushing him back down the stairs and out the door.

  “What happened?” He asked.

  I ran my fingers through my hair, unsure of what to say.

  “That was a huge mistake, Trim. You have to go.”

  “Bari . . .”

  “Please, just go.”

  He looked at me in confusion, looked angry, started to speak, then changed his mind and walked back to his condo. I was about to close the door when I glanced up and saw the back of a midnight blue Lexus truck driving away. I stepped out and looked at the personalized license plate. I stared so hard that my vision blurred. I was shaking uncontrollably as I stepped inside and closed the door. Maybe I was seeing things. Don’t be a fool, BarI, I told myself. How many people in the state of California have a license plate that says 'MLKSHKS'?

  Chapter 45

  “Gucci”

  “Bari, what’s wrong?”

  “I have to talk to you. It's an emergency. Please, get over here, and don't tell Six.”

  “What do you mean don't tell Six? Six should be over there. He left with Seven this morning. They were going over to start moving your stuff."

  "Did you see Seven pick him up?" I asked.

  "Of course. He came in and everything."

  "Gucci," I began. I knew I didn’t need to ask the question, but I asked anyway. “What was Seven driving?”

  “The Lexus. Why?”

  “I need you more right now than I ever have before.”

  “I’m on my way, Bari.”

  I waited fifteen minutes then called her back. “Gucci!”

  “I’m at the door.”

  “I've never messed up this bad in my life,” I cried. "I don't know what I was thinking."

  "Bari, bitch, don't tell me you fucked Trim. If you tell me that I'll beat your ass myself. Baby, what were you thinking? I really thought you had been looking forward to turning seventeen. I guess I was wrong.”

  “Stop it! And I didn’t have sex with Trim!”

  “What did you do then?”

  “Gucci.”

  “Uh-uh, Bari. Not this time. What did you do?”

  “You shouldn’t be talking on your cell while you’re driving. Six hates when you do that.”

  ‘’Bari.”

  “I kissed him. Well, he kissed me, I think. I don't know what happened. I know what was going to happen though, and I made him leave, but that's not the worst part, Gucci. When he left, I looked up and saw the Lexus driving away."

  "I don't think he saw. Ain't no way in hell he would have just left after seeing Trim coming out of there."

  "I thought about that, too, but why would he leave though? He didn't drive all that way for nothing."

  "Bari, I can't believe you. You're always gettin' yourself into something, but I partly blame Seven for this one I think. I'm not sure yet, let me think about it and I'll tell you when I get there."

  She ended the call. I was nervous wreck by the time Gucci got there.

  “And what do you want me to do? Hold you while you cry. You won’t use this shoulder this time! You got yourself into this, Bari. And yes, I thought about it, and Seven ain’t to blame. You are.”

  “I know that already, Judge Judy!”

  “Well, if you know already then what do you want? You want me to witness you singing you will, huh? Can I get that Rover?"

  "Gucci, you don't understand. When I told him about Trim giving me his number that time, he had already known. He said he was just waiting on me to tell him. I asked him what if I wouldn't have said anything, and he said he wouldn't have either. It was like a test, Gucci. He knows what I did, and he's waiting on me to tell him. He might not know what exactly happened, but he knows something."

  "How about a pretty Vera Wang dress? Maybe a light blue?"

  "Bitch, what? What are you talking about clothes for? A light blue dress for what?"

  "For you to be buried in."

  A chill ran down to the top of my toes.

  "I'm sick of hearing about death and being killed. Damn, who are you people, the town criers from hell?"

  "Bari, you don't take shit seriously. This shit ain't no game. You need to get your shit together, in a real way. The way I look at it, you're damned if you do, and damned if you don't. You know Seven better than anybody, do what you think is right."

  I sat and thought for a minute, then picked up the phone and dialed Seven's cell phone number.

  "What's wrong, Bari?" Bari. Not Milkshake, not baby, but Bari. I contemplated hanging up and finding a new identity somewhere far away. "You alright, Milkshake?"

  That made me feel a little better.

  "Seven, I saw you leaving here earlier. Why did you leave without letting me know you were here?" He was silent a moment too long. "And where are you now? I need to talk to you."

  "About what, baby?'

  "I don't want to talk about it over the phone."

  "Baby, just tell me."

  "No, Seven. Not like this. I need to see you."

  "I'll be over there later, Bari."

  "Is Six with you?"

  "Yeah, why?"

  "Just curious."

  "Is Gucci with you?" I hesitated a moment too long. "Thought so."

  "Seven. . . "

  "I'll see you later, Bari."

  He ended the call. My hands were shaking violently.

  "What did he say?"

  "Not a damn thing for real. He knows."

  "Did he say that?"

  "He didn't have to, Gucci."

  "I probably shouldn't, but I feel bad for you, Bari. It seems like every time you guys get it together, you do something to fuck it up."

  I blinked back tears.

  It was almost eight o'clock that night when Seven sho
wed up. Six wasn't with him, and Gucci was long gone. I was so on edge that when the doorbell rang, I picked up the phone.

  "What's up, Bari?"

  "Seven, where have you been all day?"

  He looked at me for a long time and ignored my question.

  "What do you want to talk about?" He asked.

  "I asked you earlier on the phone why you left without telling me you were here, and you never answered me."

  "So, what do you want to talk about?" He repeated.

  He was staring at me intensely. I tried to look at him, found that I couldn't and stared at the carpet as I spoke.

  "I...I..." I couldn't bring myself to tell him what I had done. "Seven, today ..."

  It was too hard. The words just wouldn't come out.

  "Today what?" His voice took on a totally different tone, one that I hadn't heard before.

  I knew I was in big trouble.

  "Trim was here," I managed, and considered leaving it that. I couldn't though. I wouldn't tell him part of the truth, he deserved better than that from me. "And, I...we ...Seven, I kissed him." I confessed in a whisper. Tears ran down my face. I was terrified. Even Paw-Paw's belt had never scared me this bad. He didn't yell nor scream. He didn't call me names. He didn't speak at all. "It won't ever happen again, Seven, I promise." I said as he stood up.

  He was leaving. He walked to the door and didn't look back until right before he closed it behind him.

  "I know it won't happen again. That problem has already been taken care of."

  Chapter 46

  When the sun came up the next morning, I was still in the same spot I was sitting in when Seven walked out my door. I hugged a pillow tightly to my chest and replayed his words over and over in my mind. I got up and went to the bathroom and to refill my coffee cup then went back to my spot. When the phone rang a few hours later, I ignored it. I turned off the machine and let whoever called me think I wasn't home. I didn't want to talk to anybody, and I knew there was no way I would ever hear from Seven again. No one else even existed to me.

  It seemed that my phone rang two hundred times before the sun went back down, leaving me alone in the dark with my thoughts. 'That problem has already been taken care of,' he had said. I wouldn't take responsibility for Trim's misfortune. I could only take my own, and that was even too painful for me. I got up and walked up the stairs, got in the shower and came back down, bringing a blanket with me. I laid there for hours, praying for sleep to come. Then a thought came to mind; the medication I was given at the hospital. I went to the medicine cabinet, swallowed four pain pills with a glass of water and went to lay back down.