Loving My SECRET (Corrigan & Co. Book 10)

by Crystal Perkins

  “Things aren’t always what they seem on TV, Maria.”

  “You’re not wearing a wedding ring.”

  “No. I’m getting divorced.”

  “Is that why you’re here? Are you going to become a nun after all?”

  I smile, because I honestly did contemplate that on the plane ride. “No. I thought about it, but I’m no longer cut out for this life. I cannot give my life to God. There is too much I’ve seen and done, and honestly still want to do.”

  “I can’t imagine myself being anywhere but here.”

  “Which is why you will make a wonderful nun.”

  “You think so?”

  “I do.”

  “Thank you. I should get back to work now. I will see you at dinner.”

  “You’re welcome, and yes. See you later.”

  After she’s gone, I walk over to the small window in the room, and peer out from the side. I know the men who are around the perimeter are watching for anything unusual. They’re watching for me. The longer I keep my presence a secret, the better. It will give my friends a chance to come and protect the women here, and the people of the village.

  Yes, I know that they are coming. I was with the Society for over ten years, and although I slowed them down, there is no way Ainsley and her team didn’t find the emails on my computer. I cringe as I think about everyone seeing my office, but it is what it is. I’m not afraid of my friends thinking I’m weak—after all, they’ve seen me pining after Matt for years, and what could be more pathetic than that?

  Even though I’m not sure I still believe, I send another prayer, asking that they make it here in time to save everyone else. Me? I don’t want to be saved. I need to save myself this time. I’ve done it during several missions, but this is more than a mission. What happens here is about my past, and moving towards my future if I make it out alive. When I kill him, it will be for me, and only me. It will save others, and I’m grateful for that, but it’s my demons that I’m hunting right now.

  The glass next to my face shatters suddenly, and as I flatten myself against the wall, I know it’s begun. He knows I’m here, and unless I give myself up, he’ll be coming for me soon. I won’t allow these walls to be breached by the evil he carries with him, so I’ll be walking out of here soon. Sooner than I thought, but that can’t be helped.

  The bell sounds for dinner, and I realize that I’ve been lost in my thoughts for longer than I planned. I change back into my simple dress, debating on how many weapons to conceal. In the end, I decide against any of them. I’ll be searched once I’m taken, and giving those men my weapons will only make them more likely to want to use them on me.

  Maria meets me outside of my room, and we walk to the dining room together. The meal we share with the other novices is simple, but it’s better than many of the meals I’ve had in famous restaurants. The tortillas are fresh, and the rice and beans cooked to perfection. The conversation, well, that’s pretty much non-existent.

  Everyone except for Maria pretty much ignores me. They introduced themselves, and gave me small smiles, but right now, they keep their eyes on their food. When they’re not sneaking glances at me while they think I’m too busy eating to notice, that is. I understand their trepidation. I’m a stranger who has invaded their sacred place. A few of them had shocked expressions when they saw me, so like Maria, they know who I am. I think that may have scared them even more.

  “Reina will be helping out while she is with us. I will re-assign some chores to her tomorrow.”

  “I won’t be here tomorrow, Mother.” This isn’t how I wanted to tell her, but time is running out.

  “You are safe here. I told you, he will not breach our walls.”

  “Someone shot out my window while I was glancing outside. I was in the shadows, and shouldn’t have been easily seen. He will send men to get me. Those who don’t pretend, as he does, to worship our Lord. Those men will care little about the vows these women have made. You know there is only one choice for me.”

  She sighs. “My novices must be my priority, but the thought of you willingly giving yourself to him is like a knife to my heart.”

  “We both knew it would come to that. I have no doubt that my friends are on their way. They will come here first, looking for me, and some will stay to protect you.”

  “Will your husband come here? We don’t allow men,” one of the novices reminds me.

  “No. Matt will not come. Some of his friends might, and I don’t want you to be scared of them; although, they will look and act very scary. Aiden, Nate, Jake, and possibly Theo will arrive with the women I used to work with. They can be trusted and will protect you, and this place.”

  “Who will protect you?” Maria asks.

  “I will have to protect myself this time.”

  “God will be with you, Reina. We will pray a rosary for you tonight.”

  “Thank you.”

  There is no more talking after that, because really, what is left to say? There is no other option than for me to walk out of here tonight. These girls can’t defend themselves, and more importantly, they won’t. They have pledged their life to God. It is a sacred pledge, stronger than a marriage bond, and one that demands they follow His law. The irony of all of this isn’t lost on me. Once I planned to make the same vow that they are making, and yet instead I chose the other vow. The one that was recently broken. My husband will not be standing with me through the bad time I’m about to face. He won’t be there for me when death comes to take me. This time, in order to protect the innocent, I’ll have to offer myself to the devil himself, and I have to do it alone.

  * * *

  Matt

  The entire plane ride was spent in the conference area of the plane. We analyzed every satellite photo and map Ainsley presented to us, and went over the plan more times than I can count. It’s all necessary, because there can be no mistakes on this mission. There will, of course, be surprises, and things no one can plan for, but human error is not an option.

  The Society women are the best in the world and us guys are pretty damn close to their level as well. No one will even consider an option where we don’t get Reina out of there alive. I’m praying that she’s more than just alive; although if she’s damaged, I’ll help her heal in any way that I can. Just like Aiden does for Ellie.

  As we de-plane at the airfield in the closest town to her village that has an airport, I look around and try to see what she saw all those years ago when she came here to get on a Corrigan or Griffin jet. I don’t know the details of her rescue, because rescuing her again has been everyone’s priority, but I want to know. When this is all over, I need to know everything that went down. A part of me feels like I deserve to know, that Reina should’ve told me long ago. But then the rest of me realizes that I never did anything to earn her trust, even when we really together for those two weeks before I was sent to the desert.

  “Matt? We have to move,” Nate says, breaking me from my thoughts.

  “Yeah. Sorry, I’m coming.”

  We get our passports stamped without a problem, and are walking through the airport when a conversation distracts me. Or rather the ring the man having the conversation is holding distracts me. It’s Reina’s engagement ring, and my feet are moving before my mouth even opens. I grab the guy and lift him off his feet.

  “Where did you get that ring?” I ask him in Spanish. I learned the language years ago, when I was holding out hope for Reina and I. I wanted to honor her family and her heritage.

  “She gave it to me.”

  “She?”

  “Reina. Reina gave it to me in exchange for helping her.”

  “Matt,” Jake says, running up next to me. “Put the guy down. People are staring, and we don’t need the police onto us.

  “He has Reina’s ring. He says she gave it to him,” I say, dropping him back to the floor and putting my arm around him. I smile to the crowd that was watching us before addressing them. “We’re old friends. Just playin
g around.” I nudge my “buddy” and he smiles and nods, too.

  When we get outside, we see that almost everyone else has left already. Stella is standing next to an SUV, tapping her foot and glaring at me. When she sees I have a new friend, she drops the glare. “Who’s he?”

  “Someone who says Reina gave him her engagement ring in exchange for helping her.”

  “Let’s get better acquainted, and then you can help us,” she tells him with a smile before I toss him in the backseat.

  “Please. You have to let me go. I can’t go back to the village,” he begs as the car rolls away from the curb.

  “Why can’t you go back?” I ask.

  “They know someone helped Reina get inside the convent. One of the men saw her there, and they are planning to flush her out tonight. The man in charge will not take her himself on holy ground, but he has already done something to show her he is willing to send others in.”

  “What did he do?”

  “I do not know. There were men in the village, spreading the information. Hoping to get one of us to confess to helping her. I do not want to die.”

  “You took her in through the tunnel, didn’t you?”

  “Yes. How do you know of it?”

  “We have our ways. How many men are in the village?”

  “Around fifty.”

  “And there are another twenty or so around the convent?”

  He shakes his head. “More now. Maybe forty.” He sighs, and then gives us more information. Information we already have, but I’m glad he’s telling us because it means we can maybe trust him. “He’s staying at a farm outside of the village. The people there keep to themselves, and I think he has owned it all along. I’m sure he has more men there as well.”

  “We know.”

  “Can I go now? I really want to be as far away from here as possible. I know Reina won’t want to tell them, but if he tortures her…”

  “She won’t tell. No matter what is done to her. I can guarantee that,” Stella says.

  “The man behind this all is a dead man already. He just doesn’t know it yet. If he touches my wife, I’ll just make it more painful for him. As for you, I need that ring back. I will give you money to get wherever you’re going, but I can’t let you have that ring.”

  “I understand. I tried to give it back to her, but she wouldn’t take it. She said, well, that she had no sentimental attachment to it,” he tells me as he hands it over.

  “I’m not blaming you,” I tell him, pulling out one of my bundles of cash from my bag and tossing it to him. “I just need it back.”

  We let him out at the next street and then make our way to the house Ainsley bought us under a dummy corporation. When I said that money talks, I meant it. She had the papers signed and the keys delivered to a guy here in a matter of hours. Between money, and the Society connections, there’s not much that these women can’t do. I’m counting on all of that to save Reina.

  Once we get inside the house, Ainsley, Tegan, and Isa break us all into groups based on skill set and what they’ve determined for the mission. My friends are all split into other groups, while mine includes Jade and Isa. I’m anxious to get moving and wish they could just fill us all in during the drive. We’re two hours from the village and that’s too far for my liking. I know they want to make sure we’re extra prepared, and a Society mission normally has at least one week of prep time, but I’m itching to move.

  When the women’s arms all light up with a distress signal, the talking stops, and we’re all running for the door. The local teams don’t know what they signal means, but the rest of us do. Reina took something with her when she left, and now she’s put out a call for help. She knew we’d come looking—or at least she knew the women would come—and she is trying to save herself, even if in the back of my mind, I thought she wanted to die.

  Chapter 5

  Reina,

  Today was one of the hardest days of my life. Top five for sure. Walking into the Foundation and seeing you there nearly brought me to my knees. We’ve avoided each other all these years, but now we can’t anymore. And God help me, I don’t want to. I know I can’t have you, and seeing you will be torture, but I have to see you. You looked so gorgeous in that silk blouse and tight pencil skirt. I can tell that you’re more toned, and stronger, than you were when we were together, but your curves still have me wanting to build that shrine. It took everything I had in me not to run to you, and pull you into my arms. I saw the pain my presence brought you, and I wanted to do anything to take it away. Those cheesy lines about absence making the heart grow fonder? Yeah, they’re all true and more. My heart isn’t just fond of you, my beautiful queen. It yearns for you, and you alone. I know that it doesn’t matter what I want. All that matters is that you’re happy. And you were until you saw me. You were laughing, and I need you to stay that way. That’s why I made the mean and crude remarks to you. I can’t have you seeing me as the man you once loved. If you did, I would be tempted to tell you everything, and then you’d look at me in disgust. I’d rather have anger from you, so I’ll push for that. Please know I didn’t mean any of the nasty things I said today, or those I’ll be saying in the future. I just need the wall between us to stay in place.

  I really do love you,

  Matt

  * * *

  Almost five years ago…

  Things have finally started getting back to normal with the Foundation and the Society. When Mitchell Corrigan died last year, it was a huge blow to Jane. She knew it was coming, but nothing can truly prepare you for a loss that profound. I’ve essentially been running things so that she could have a chance to grieve.

  In his will, Mitchell asked that Corrigan & Co. be moved to Las Vegas. He grew up here, and wanted to help the economy with the extra jobs he could provide. In Chicago, the Foundation offices were in a separate building than the company itself, because there was no room for everything we needed. That’s not the case here. Mitchell had already hired Ryan Griffin to build this place where everyone would work together, and although he didn’t know what the sub-floors would be used for, Ryan did an excellent job. So good that I couldn’t come up with even one argument as to why we couldn’t all be together. Being afraid of what would happen when I was finally forced to see Matt again is not something I can use in this situation.

  Avoiding him wasn’t a problem until recently. Matt was career military until his grandfather died, and made it impossible for him to stay away from the business. He couldn’t let his bastard of a father run Corrigan. For the last year, he’s been in charge of the company—and landing in every tabloid imaginable for his nighttime activities. I managed to make excuses for why I couldn’t attend a party or ball that he’d be at in Chicago, but I don’t know if I can do that here.. I’m pretty sure Jane knew the real reason I wouldn’t go, but she never called me on it once.

  Audrey was a different story. She was the one I went to when everything fell apart. When Matt dumped me like I was a piece of trash. I couldn’t talk to my mom, and I definitely couldn’t talk to Jane, so it was Audrey who held me when I needed to cry. She got mad when I refused to go to events, and told me I was better than that. And it’s Audrey who has stopped laughing along with Stella and I, to glare behind my back as we stand in our new lobby.

  “What are you doing here?” she asks, with the emphasis on “you,” and just like that I know who I’ll find when I turn around. I make myself do it anyway.

  “I’m the head of Corrigan & Co. That makes me responsible for all of you little girls who do whatever it is you do.”

  “Little girls? I would love to hear your grandmother talk about us like that,” Stella says, moving to stand next to me.

  Matt looks her up and down, then smiles. “Gram sure knows how to pick ‘em. I wouldn’t kick you out of my bed, sweetheart.”

  “No? Well how about I kick your ass, and we can go from there?”

  “Oh, I’d love to see you try. Can we have some whipped cream, o
r jello?”

  I hold out an arm to stop Stella from attacking, because that would make things worse. “Ignore him, Stell. He’s an ass.”

  “I seem to remember that you liked my ass. You used to dig those sweet teenage nails into it while I fucked you, and it was hot as hell, Reina.”

  “I need you to leave now, Matt,” I say, struggling to hold it together as he smirks.

  “Oh, I get it. You’re jealous of the blonde. Don’t worry, even if I’m not interested, you still look pretty good. I wouldn’t mind giving you a pity fuck if you needed it so we can clear the air.”

  Audrey has him on the floor with her gun at his throat before he even sees her coming. “I love Jane, but so help me God, I will kill you if you mess with her again. Leave Reina alone.”

  “I was just playing around,” he protests, jumping to his feet with her still on top of him. He catches her as she falls backwards, and kisses her cheek.

  Audrey slaps him before I grab her arms and pull her back behind me. I don’t need anyone to fight this battle for me. It’s been coming for years, and I’m ready. Well, kind of. Still. It’s my fight and no one else’s.

  “No. What you were doing is trying to hurt me again. That’s not going to happen. I’m not the young girl who fell for the lies you fed her until you got tired of pretending.”

  I see a flash of something cross his face. Shame? Pain? I don’t know because it’s gone before I can analyze it. That damn smirk of his is back, and he’s taking no prisoners. Classic Matthew Corrigan.

  “I’m sorry if you got addicted to my dick after having a taste. I never promised you anything besides that, so you have no one to blame but yourself if your feelings were hurt.”

  We both know that’s a lie, and I see the challenge in his eyes. He’s daring me to contradict him, and remind him that he promised me everything. He even said he wanted to marry me when his tour was over. Now I know he never meant it, but there were promises from him. All of them broken, just like I was, but they were made nonetheless.