First Instinct

by Suzie O'Connell

  Almost a quarter of an hour passed before Beth decided it was safe to announce her presence to her boyfriend. It probably wouldn’t be enough, but time was ticking away. “It’s Beth,” she called half a second after she knocked.

  “It’s open, babe. Come on in.”

  Cautiously, she turned the scuffed brass doorknob and pushed the door open. With amusement, she marveled at how different Trey’s room was from Nick’s… and how both fit their residents perfectly. Nick’s dorm was subtly masculine with artifacts and knickknacks from his family’s ranch and photos of his family and friends that exemplified his loyalty and easygoing nature. Trey’s room was unapologetically masculine with bold colors, posters of his favorite actresses and sports teams, and his various sports trophies strewn about with an almost in-your-face lack of coordination that suited him perfectly.

  Stepping a little further into the room, she was unsurprised to find Trey dressed only in his boxers and admiring his reflection in the full-length mirror on his closet door. With perpetually tousled brown hair, confident brown eyes, and an angular face, Trey Holt was blatantly handsome. Factor in his sculpted, muscular physique and the work he put in to keep it that way, and it was no wonder half the girls on campus fawned over him.

  “Yes, you’re gorgeous,” she remarked. “Hurry up and get dressed.”

  “What’s the rush?” he inquired without looking away from the mirror.

  “For one… we agreed on six-thirty for dinner. Remember?”

  “Yeah, I guess I remember that, but it’s not like we’re on a tight schedule. If we’re late, we’re late.”

  “Actually, we are on a schedule. We’re meeting Nick and Michelle at the Whiskey Creek Grill.”

  Finally, he swiveled around to face her. At first, his expression was one of mild annoyance, but it vanished quickly, and he affected an air of nonchalance before he turned back to the mirror to comb his fingers through his still-dripping hair. “Tonight? That’s short notice.”

  “I told you this morning I was going to ask him again, and you told me any night would be fine.”

  “Yeah, but I was hoping for a little more warning.”

  “I’m sorry, but I had the opportunity, so I took it.”

  Trey at last left the mirror and walked over to his closet and pulled out a plain, form-fitting black T-shirt. Then he dragged a pair of crisp blue jeans out of his dresser and tossed them and the shirt on the back of his desk chair. “I’m shocked Nick agreed. He’s kinda turned into a stick-in-the-mud.”

  Beth disagreed, but she said nothing to that effect because, really, what could she say? She didn’t know why Nick had become averse to Trey’s company. “Given the choice, I think he would have turned me down again, but Michelle was there, and she said yes.”

  “Did you do something to piss Nick off?”

  “No. Why?”

  “Just seems like he doesn’t ever want to hang out with you anymore.”

  She wasn’t about to divulge the details of her conversation with her best friend, so she shrugged, “He has a pretty serious girlfriend now. I can hardly blame him for wanting to spend his time with her. But he agreed to go out with us tonight, so get dressed.”

  “We’ve still got plenty of time,”

  Trey sidled over to her and lowered his head to give her a kiss. When she pressed a finger to his lips, stopping him, his brows dipped briefly in irritation.

  “Yeah, right. I know you, Trey.”

  “Oh, come on, babe. I’m not that bad.”

  “Uh, yes, you are.” She touched her lips to his, and when she pulled back, the annoyance had been replaced by a roguish lopsided smile. “But I love you, anyhow.”

  “Mmm. Good. Because I love you, too.”

  He angled his hips toward her and clasped her face as he kissed her more deeply. Beth leaned into him, giving in for a moment to appreciate the firm warmth of his body. She ran her hands back through his hair and flicked water from her fingers before folding her arms around his neck with a sigh. He skimmed his fingers over the side of her breast so lightly that she might have mistaken it for an accidental graze had he not tried the same a dozen times before. She leaned away, but he quickly knitted his hands together behind her back, preventing her escape.

  “Trey,” she murmured.

  “I’m not doing anything but touching you, Beth. You have such a beautiful body, baby, and it drives me crazy.”

  “You know how I feel.”

  “Touching is not the same as sex.”

  “Not necessarily, but I’m not a tease, and I don’t want you trying to take a mile if I give you an inch.”

  “You may not be a tease in that sense,” Trey said slowly, trailing kisses from her mouth back to her ear and down her neck, “but you are so very, very tempting.”

  “That is exactly my point.”

  “Don’t you trust me to stop?”

  “It’s not a matter of trust. It’s a matter of playing with fire. Do it long enough, and you’re bound to get burned.”

  “You make sex sound like some horrible thing that will ruin you. I promise you it won’t.” He tightened his arms around her and lowered his head again to nuzzle her neck, and even though she was exasperated by his stubbornness, she couldn’t deny that she enjoyed the tingles that coursed through her. “On second thought… maybe it will ruin you because once you’ve—”

  “Trey. Enough.” She ducked out of his grasp, tugged on the hem of her dress to pull the wrinkles out of it, and sat on the edge of his bed. “I know I’m asking a lot of you to wait, and if you decide you can’t do it any longer, I know where the door is.”

  Trey tilted his head and frowned as he sat beside her. “Don’t be like that, babe. I love you. I’m sorry I’ve made you uncomfortable, but it’s a little frustrating that I can’t even touch you how I want to. And believe me, I really want to.”

  “I know it’s not much consolation, but I truly appreciate your restraint. I know it’s not easy.”

  “No, it isn’t.”

  Talk about beating a dead horse. She stood again, leaned down to kiss his cheek, and said, “Meet me at my room in twenty. I still have to put my hair up, and I might even put on a little makeup.”

  He nodded, and she kissed him on the lips before leaving. Closing the door quietly behind her, she let out a sigh of relief. Lately, he’d been trying more often and more relentlessly to push her limits.

  As she strode back to her dorm beneath the massive white poplars gilded by the evening sun, she pondered her upcoming anniversary.

  In a couple more weeks, she and Trey would be celebrating one full year together, making the longest relationship either had been in, and she thought back over the course of their relationship. Was he really getting more aggressive, or was she imagining it because she was becoming wearied by it? She couldn’t answer that, but Nick’s attitude toward Trey had most definitely changed, and she wondered if his relationship with Michelle had impacted his patience for Trey with no idea how or why it would.

  Truthfully, she felt like she was being unfair to Trey for even thinking like this. Aside from his sexual frustration, which she could hardly blame him for even though it unsettled her, he was generally a charming and lovable companion. Needing her space as she did, she liked that he didn’t try to smother her and that he actually seemed to admire her independence. As she listed out his positive attributes to herself, she began to understand that she was trying to convince herself that he was still the man she wanted to be with. Try as she might to deny it or ignore it, there was a niggling sense of something out of place. She kept coming back to the same question over and over. Why doesn’t Nick like Trey anymore?

  Her thoughts carried her all the way to her room, and before she became consciously aware of what she was doing, she was standing in front of the sink with her hair pulled back in a ponytail and her makeup done, staring bewilderedly at her reflection. After all that thinking, she had no answer and supposed the only way she was going to find it
was to ask Nick straight out.

  A knock on her door announced Trey’s arrival, and she opened it for him. He hesitated, waiting for her to invite him in. Then, as if he couldn’t help himself, he hugged her.

  “I was an ass to you,” he whispered. “I’m just frustrated and….”

  “Horny?”

  He laughed. “Yeah. I wish there was something I could to do convince you how good it would feel.”

  “That’s what you don’t get, Trey. To me, sex means so much more than physical pleasure; it’s a soul-deep connection, and the only man I want to share something that personal with is the man I marry.”

  “You’re right. I don’t understand you, but I understand that it’s important to you, so I’ll try to be better about keeping my hands to myself.”

  “Thank you.” She tucked her arms around him and rested her head against his chest. “But you don’t have to keep your hands entirely to yourself. Just… please remember where my boundaries are.”

  “So, you forgive me?”

  Smiling, she said, “I can’t forgive you because I wasn’t mad at you.”

  Two

  Nick knitted his hands behind his head and tilted his face toward the sky. The late August evening was balmy, but already the air was starting to lose the ability to hold the sun’s heat as the days dwindled toward autumn. Closing his eyes, he listened to the chatter of his companions and the other diners who, like his group, were out on the back patio of the Whiskey Creek Grill to soak up a little more summer before the weather started turning colder.

  “See? Wasn’t this a good idea?” Beth asked.

  He opened an eye to meet her gaze, then closed it again and smiled. “Yeah, it was. It’s a perfect evening.”

  He stretched his legs out in front of him, crossing his ankles, and nudged someone’s foot under the table.

  “Hey, watch where you’re sticking those long legs of yours, Nick,” Trey said laughingly and gave him a kick.

  “I have a better idea. Keep your big clodhoppers on your side of the table,” Nick said but pulled his legs back.

  Leave it to Trey to ruin his moment of bliss. Sitting up straighter, he draped an arm around his girlfriend’s shoulders. Michelle snuggled into his side and tilted her face up, so he tucked her hair behind her ear and kissed her lightly. Thus far, she had held up beautifully against Beth’s rapid-fire questioning and was actually a little smug having gained the approval of his oldest friend.

  The waitress brought the checks and cleared away their dishes. Nick took out his wallet and pulled out thirty dollars to cover his and Michelle’s meal.

  “Isn’t it your turn to get dinner?” Trey asked Beth.

  “No, I paid last time.”

  “I didn’t bring enough cash, babe, because I thought it was your turn.”

  “I got it,” Nick said. He glanced at Trey as he pulled the requisite cash out of his wallet and frowned. With only a glimmer of humor in his voice, he said, “Next time we all go out together, you’re paying, Trey.”

  “So… Nick and I thought it would be fun to head down to the Club Bar for a little dancing since they have a live band tonight,” Michelle said, abruptly and—Nick guessed—intentionally changing the subject. “Join us?”

  “I don’t know about dancing, but I wouldn’t mind heading that way for a drink or two and maybe some pool,” Trey replied. “You up to having your ass kicked again, Nick?”

  “No thanks.” He forced a smile. “I wasn’t up for it last time.”

  He pushed to his feet and headed inside to pay. The others followed close behind, and after he’d paid, Beth leaned in and said, “I could have paid for Trey and me.”

  “I know. That isn’t the point.”

  He didn’t give her an opportunity to say anything more on the matter. Taking Michelle’s hand, he led her outside, holding the door for her and Beth and barely resisting the urge to let it slam in Trey’s face. If the other man hadn’t been holding Beth’s hand, Nick might just have done it. Instead, he shifted his attention westward. The sun, riding close to the sagebrush hills on the edge of town, bathed the storefronts lining the east side of Montana Street with rich golden light. Insects and dust hovered in the still air, almost suspended and limned by that incredible light. Golden hour indeed. It was a stunning night, and one he wished he was enjoying on his family’s sprawling ranch in the Northstar Valley instead of pretending he was still friends with Trey.

  “I definitely understand now why you and Beth have been such good friends for so long,” Michelle remarked. “You’re two peas in a pod.”

  He stopped on the sidewalk and pulled her against him to kiss her. After, she slipped her hand into the crook of his elbow, and they started walking again. “That was fun. I wish now we had gotten together with her a lot sooner. I know you all were busy on your ranches most of the time you and I have been going out, but come on. We were all within sixty miles of Devyn all summer. We could have done it. Or do you really dislike Trey that much?”

  “I’m really starting to dislike him that much,” Nick replied honestly after a moment’s hesitation.

  “You seemed to get along with him all right.”

  “I can still tolerate him when I have to.” Nick glanced over his shoulder. “We were never great friends, but we were a lot closer back in high school than we are now.”

  “What changed?”

  “He started turning into a selfish ass. I mean, he’s always been a little arrogant, but he wasn’t as bad as he is now. And he likes to party a lot, which isn’t my style.”

  “I don’t get what Beth sees in him or how she puts up with that from him. She seems so sweet and….”

  “Innocent?”

  Michelle laughed. “Yeah.”

  “Don’t let that fool you. She’s one of the most stubborn people I know, and she has no trouble keeping him in check.” Frowning, he added, “Or she used to. I get the feeling that’s changing, too.”

  They had reached the Club Bar, so the conversation ended for the time being. The door was open to let in the balmy evening air, and Nick stepped aside so Michelle and Beth could enter first and, deciding to take the high road and be gracious, he even waited for Trey to walk inside before he followed his companions. Just inside, a hulk of a man checked their IDs and told them to have a good time.

  The bar stood to the left, four pool tables dominated the center of the room, a few tables with chairs were pushed up against the front and rear walls, and a dozen poker and keno machines lined the right wall beside a twelve-foot doorway that opened into the bar’s dance and party room. A raised stage with a booth to one side commanded attention from the left wall, but the room was otherwise open.

  They made their way through the crowd—mostly other college students—and after his eyes adjusted to the dim interior, Nick spotted his twin brothers at the bar. He excused himself from his companions. Aaron and Henry might be just two years younger and in college themselves, but that didn’t mean his duty to keep them out of trouble had ended. If anything, they were even worse away from the ranch. Just a week ago when the dorms had been opened for students to move in, he’d dragged them out of a fight in this very bar right before the cops showed up. They hadn’t started it, but they’d been hell bent on finishing it.

  “What are you two doing here?” he asked. He glanced at their wrists to make sure they hadn’t removed the wristbands that marked them as under age. The bartenders wouldn’t serve them, but that didn’t mean they wouldn’t try to con someone into buying them drinks.

  The older, Aaron, grinned. “Hey, big brother.”

  “So, you gonna buy us a beer now that you’re twenty-one and all legal?” Henry asked.

  “No, I’m not.”

  “Oh, come on, Nick,” Henry said. “Mom and Dad let us have a beer or two at home once in a while.”

  “Yeah, on the ranch where you aren’t going to get into any trouble.” He settled a hand on each brother’s shoulder and squeezed. “You get caught dri
nking in town, you’re in deep shit. So I’d better not hear anything about you getting someone else to buy you drinks.”

  “Party pooper,” Henry muttered.

  “Yep. Michelle, can I buy you a drink?”

  “Sure. I’d love a fuzzy navel.”

  Nick flagged down one of the three bartenders, ordered Michelle’s drink and a Coke each for him and Beth. Trey could buy his own drinks or get someone else to buy them for him. Glancing toward the pool tables, he saw that Trey already had a beer, anyhow, and was currently engaged in what appeared to be a heated conversation with the guy Beth had dated before Trey while they waited for the players at the table closest to the door into the dance room to finish their game.

  Nick shook his head. Swiveling around on his bar stool with his back to the bar and his free arm propped on it, he forced his attention elsewhere. For a few minutes, he watched the crowd of dancers in the other room. A dance or two with Michelle—and maybe one with Beth since Trey didn’t dance—sounded like fun, but he had a paper due on Friday that needed some serious attention, so he didn’t want to stay out late tonight.

  Before he could ask Michelle to dance, three of her friends walked in and immediately engaged her. Since she was still nursing her drink, Nick asked if it would be all right with her if he danced with Beth while she chatted.

  “Sure. Have some fun,” she replied.

  Beth gleefully accepted his invitation, and he pulled her onto the dance floor. She stepped into his arms with masterful poise and moved effortlessly with him to the mid-tempo song. Though he had scorned his mother’s insistence that he learn how to dance properly when he was younger, he was glad for it now because it was an activity he quite enjoyed.

  “So, now that you’ve spent a little time with Michelle… what do you think of her?” he asked.

  “I like her. A lot. She’s almost as mellow as you are, and I think she’s a good match for you. You’re much more relaxed with her than you were with your last girlfriend.”