My Kinda Kisses

by Lacey Black

  “Thank you. These are some of my best sellers. I go through probably ten pairs of candlesticks a week, and upwards of twenty a week during busy holiday weekends.” The little pixie woman walks over and places the completed piece on a shelf with six others beside the kiln to dry.

  “You have a beautiful place,” Ryan adds, turning and looking at a glass place setting next to where we stand.

  “I appreciate that. It’s a lot of work, but it’s my true passion. My glass shop is in a small building out back, and I work with pottery and ceramic back here. Feel free to browse around. If you need help with anything, just holler. I’m going to get the matching candlestick completed so they can dry together.”

  Ryan and I watch her start the next candlestick before turning and perusing at several pieces on glass display shelves around the room. A gorgeous ocean blue glass bowl catches my attention. As I approach, I see etched seashells around the rim. It’s a stunning piece, one that would look amazing displayed in the center of a dining room table. Specifically, my dining room table.

  The only problem is that I don’t have a dining room table. Yet. Not one of my own.

  But this piece is too stunning to pass up. With steady hands, I gently pick up the glass object. In direct light, the blue is more vibrant and sparkles like sapphires. The etchings are subtle, each shell different from the one beside it. Flipping it over, I see $74.99. Ordinarily, it’s a little steep for my blood, especially for a piece of décor, but I have to have it. It’s exquisite.

  “I like that,” Ryan says over my shoulder.

  When I turn to face him, he’s holding a large bag with something wrapped in tissue paper. “What’s that?”

  “Nothing for you to worry about right now,” he replies, that cocky smirk playing on the corners of his mouth.

  Taking my purchase up to the counter, I retrieve my debit card from my purse. “This is a gorgeous bowl,” the woman who was making candlesticks says. “I love working with this blue glass. The outcome is always splendid, the colors rich and bold.”

  “My eyes were drawn to this piece, and I couldn’t pass it up,” I state as I sign my name to the little slip of paper.

  “Since you and your husband both made a purchase today,” she starts as she turns and grabs a small pottery vase off the display shelf closest to her. It’s a lighter shade of clay with vibrant flowers complexly weaved around the base of the vase. “I’m throwing in this piece. It will complement the bowl beautifully.”

  As flattered as I am about the gift, I’m still trying to process her comment about my husband. “Oh, we’re not… I mean, I’m not married.”

  “Oh.” She gazes deeply at me, her deep brown eyes piercing me straight to my soul. “My mistake. When I see a couple so clearly in love, I guess I just assume they’re married.”

  I blush a dark shade of red. “It’s okay,” I whisper. Glancing over my shoulder, I watch Ryan as he checks out some pieces by the front door. “Thank you for the vase. It’s beautiful,” I add as I take the proffered bag with the wrapped vase and bowl.

  “Thank you. Enjoy your stay at Travelers End. If you’re back in the area soon, stop by and say hello,” she offers with a smile.

  Offering a nod, I turn and head towards Ryan. We’re both silent as we head towards where we parked his truck. My thoughts are stuck on that one word: Husband. A single word that causes my breath to falter and my underarms to perspire.

  But now, it doesn’t seem quite so scary. Now, the idea of a husband seems logical and pleasant. As Ryan and I walk together, I’m breathing harshly for another reason. I realize that the idea of Ryan as my husband isn’t terrifying. In fact, it’s completely the opposite. I feel at ease, peaceful.

  It feels right.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Ryan

  Jaime is curled up against me, sleeping peacefully. She’s gloriously naked beneath the sheet, her soft skin pressed firmly against my body. It’s a sensation I’ll never get enough of.

  The alarm clock beside me reads two a.m. I’ve been unable to sleep since we came back to our room at the end of the evening. My mind kept replaying the conversation between Jaime and the shop owner where she purchased the blue bowl and I bought the matching candlesticks that are still safely tucked away in the bag. The woman thought we were married, and even though I couldn’t see Jaime’s face, I could hear the surprise in her response.

  All evening–as we walked hand-in-hand back to my truck, as we drove to the seaside restaurant Martin helped me make reservations at, and as we dined on fresh seafood–I was haunted by that one word: Marriage. I want to get married, someday, but now the idea has been planted in my mind and is blossoming into a full-blown tree of hope. I want to marry Jaime. I know it. I feel it in my heart and deep in my soul. I’d propose tomorrow if I thought she’d say yes. But I know she won’t. She’s not ready.

  And that’s okay–for now.

  Maybe I’m not quite ready. We’ve hardly known each other two months. In all honesty, our instant connection and my resulting love for her seem too good to be true. I mean, we hardly know each other, right? I don’t know what kind of toothpaste she prefers or whether she buys white or wheat bread. But for as hasty as our relationship appears, it also feels like I’ve known her forever. She completes my thoughts and grounds me. She wormed her way under my skin so damn quickly, it’s as if she’s always been there.

  While we made love after returning from dinner, I showered her with as much adoration as I could give. I showed her, repeatedly, that I was here to stay, never once saying one of the millions of things I longed to say to her for fear of freaking her out. Instead I told her the one thing she has accepted: that I love her.

  Everything else will come in time.

  Yet that doesn’t quiet my mind or slow the steady beat of my heart. Sleep has yet to find me because I’ve contemplated every scenario I can conjure up in my mind from begging her to move in to asking her to marry me. I’ve also come up with every excuse she could give me to say no. It’s terrifying, putting your heart out there and risking someone trampling it into the dirt as if it meant nothing.

  Not that I think Jaime would do that, intentionally. Jaime’s still skittish when it comes to relationships, and while ours has been working out well in the time we’ve known each other, I won’t risk that happiness to move this on into the next level.

  But I want to.

  Sliding carefully, I gently move Jaime until she’s no longer wrapped around me. My body longs for her touch once more, but I push the feeling aside and get out of bed. Grabbing my shorts off the floor, I slip them on, followed by a t-shirt. As I carefully open our bedroom door, I glance back at the beauty sleeping peacefully in bed. A smarter man would rid himself of all of the clothes he just put on and climb back inside the warm covers, but I’m in desperate need of a little air, so I push aside the longing for her touch, and slip out of the room.

  The house is silent as I move down the stairs and head towards the back door. I’m surprised to find it not only unlocked, but also ajar. Outside, the July night is calm. The salty air carries a hint of crispness and the fragrance of lavender.

  “I’m a little surprised to see you out here,” a familiar voice says from the shadows.

  “Likewise,” I reply, turning to face Jaime’s grandpa.

  “Can’t sleep?” he asks while I pull up a chair.

  “No.”

  “Me neither. This hard-on won’t go down,” he says casually as if he wasn’t just referring to the junk in his pants.

  Reflexively, I glance down and instantly wish I hadn’t. Averting my eyes as quickly as possible, I clear my throat.

  “It’s okay, son. It’ll go down eventually. The doc always says not to worry unless it’s been four hours.”

  “How long have you…uh, had your problem?” I ask, wishing I could retract my question as soon as it flies from my lips.

  Orval glances at his watch. “Only an hour sin
ce the missus and I finished up another round of making music on the flesh flute. I’ve still got another bit before it subsides. No amount of orgasms helps me when Viagra’s in my system. I could go for hours with this little blue pill,” he says, pulling a bottle from the chest pocket of his shirt. “Want one?” he offers.

  “Uh, no. Thanks, but I’m good.”

  “Don’t need ‘em, huh? Yeah, it wasn’t that long ago that I didn’t need ‘em. Unfortunately, old age can take a toll on the male body, son. You’ll learn eventually. When your woman has a sex drive like a chimpanzee, you’ll do whatever it takes to give her what she wants.”

  “Wow, that’s a lot of information.”

  We both stare out over the blackened beach, hypnotized by the sound of the waves crashing on the shore. “So, you’ve never said what you were doing out here.” Orval states.

  “Couldn’t sleep,” I mumble, recalling the dilemma that has my mind bouncing all over the place.

  “Female troubles?” he asks.

  “Is there any other kind?” I ask, humorously.

  “Nope. Most troubles seem to be centered around females. But in my experience, those troubles are the best kinds.” His soft laughter fills the air.

  Silence surrounds us once more as he waits me out. “I want something from your granddaughter that I’m afraid she’s not ready for.”

  “Ahhh. I think I understand a little. You’re ready for something more than you think my granddaughter can give.”

  I nod my head in confirmation.

  “Son, let me tell you something about our Jaime. She loves fiercely, which I’m sure you’ve discovered. But she also loves completely. There’s no doubt that she loved that jackass she was going to marry before.” I bristle at the thought.

  “But she didn’t love him completely. She didn’t look at him the way I’ve seen her look at you. She didn’t smile or laugh as much either. Do you know why that is?” Words lodge painfully in my throat, refusing to escape.

  “Because she loves you completely. Believe it, Ryan. She’s timid and scared because of her previous mistakes, but don’t let that fear detour you from seeing the big picture here. She’s in love with you, completely, with her whole heart. There’s not a doubt in my mind. It’s the same way I look at my Emmy. It’s the same way Trisha used to look at Brian before the cancer took her from us. It’s everlasting and whole. Believe that.”

  Orval’s gaze is fierce. “So whatever it is you’re going to ask her, just do it. She might not answer you right away, but that’s because she’s going to give it her complete thought and attention. She won’t make a big decision without considering it from all angles. She’ll probably need to make a list like she used to when she was younger. Give her time and space, but don’t give up on her. Time together means nothing, Ryan. I knew the moment I met my Emma that she was the one. The same way I’m sure you know it with Jaime. When she’s ready, she’ll make you the happiest man on the face of the earth.”

  I consider his words, mulling them over again and again while we listen to the night. His words confirm my suspicions that Jaime will pull back until she’s had time to process her feelings. Asking her to move in with me will surely rock her foundation, but it’s a risk I’m willing to take. Being without her isn’t an option anymore. I’m ready to take that leap, ensuring more time with her.

  “My little problem seems to have subsided,” Orval says as he stands. I catch myself before I’m able to glance down at his shorts. That’s an image I don’t need repeated in my mind. “Think it over, Ryan, and when you’re ready, know that she’ll give your question complete consideration.”

  With that he turns and heads towards the back door. “And for the record, I’m certain she’ll happily agree to whatever it is you want to ask her.” Orval grins a broad smile and heads inside.

  His words only seal the deal where she’s concerned. It’s settled. When we get home tomorrow afternoon, I’m going to take her to my place and ask her to move in with me. I’m ready, and I’m sure she’s ready as well. She’s already said she loved me, and that was a hurdle I was afraid she’d never jump over. But she did.

  And now it’s time to take the next step towards my future with Jaime.

  I only hope she doesn’t push me away for too long while she decides.

  ***

  Jaime chats animatedly during our drive back to Jupiter Bay. The sun is high in the sky as we cruise along the highway, only a few miles an hour over the speed limit. Though I’m anxious to get home, traffic is a little on the heavy side on this Sunday afternoon and is slowing down the trip. Unable to pass, I tap my foot nervously on the floorboard as the sign for the city limits of home finally comes into sight.

  “Are you all right?” Jaime asks, her hand on my leg pulling me from my thoughts.

  “Yeah, sure. Why?” I ask, glancing over to see the sunlight reflecting off her hair.

  “You just seem distracted, that’s all.” She shrugs and gives me a timid smile.

  “Yeah, sorry. I guess I was. I have something I want to talk to you about when we get back to my place.”

  I notice her brow wrinkle as I return my eyes to the road, slowing down to abide by the city speed limits. My heart is racing and my right foot twitches to apply a little more pressure to the pedal. “It’s nothing bad, sweetheart. In fact, I think it’s great. Don’t worry,” I reassure her as I grab her hand and kiss her knuckles.

  After pulling into my driveway, Jaime’s car is still parked in the street where we left it, I hop out of the truck and run to retrieve our bags as if my ass were on fire. The keys are in my hand and the front door is open only a few seconds later.

  Dropping our bags on the floor, I practically drag her into the kitchen. Placing my hands on her shoulders, I gently push her into the first seat. Then I pace. I move from the table to the kitchen sink and back again. Suddenly, the words I’ve been anxious to say won’t come. My mind blanks and I have no clue how to start this conversation.

  “Ryan?” she whispers behind me.

  Turning and facing her, I stall. “Do you want a drink?” I grab two bottles of water from the fridge and place one in front of her. Then I proceed to practically drain my entire bottle in one long gulp. Even after the water is gone, my throat still feels parched, my tongue thick.

  “So…Jaime, I was thinking…” Again, I start to pace.

  “Ryan!” Jaime proclaims, breaking through and grabbing my attention. “Will you please sit down? You’re starting to scare me,” she says, her voice dropping to just above a whisper.

  Quickly, I move to the table. Grabbing the chair across from her, I position it so that I’m sitting beside the table, directly in front of her. I reach for her hand and cradle it in my own. Running my thumb along the soft flesh over her hand, my heart starts to calm, nerves fade away.

  “Hi,” I say with a smile, her gorgeous green eyes directly in front of me.

  “Hi,” she replies with her own timid grin.

  “I had an idea I wanted to run by you. I’ll be honest, I’m not sure how you’re going to take what I have to say, so promise me you’ll listen until I’m finished and with an open mind.”

  “Okay.”

  I take a deep breath and begin my pitch. “I’ve had the time of my life in the last several weeks, and it’s all because of you. Every moment I spend with you is greater than the last, and I look forward to the end of my workday because there’s a chance I get to see you. Jaime, I know we’ve only been seeing each other for a little more than a month, but it feels like a lot longer, doesn’t it?” I ask.

  She seems unable to say words, but I’m awarded with a quick nod.

  Getting up, I head over and grab the white bag from the glass shop we visited yesterday. Retrieving the goods inside, I slide back down into my chair and hand her the bag.

  “I saw you yesterday admiring that blue bowl. Your face lit up, eyes sparkling like emeralds. I knew you had to have it. In
fact, if you wouldn’t have purchased it, I was going to get it for you. Open it,” I say, nodding towards the bag in her hands.

  Jaime takes her time, her hands slightly trembling as she carefully unwraps the first of two wrapped items. When she finally reveals what’s inside, her mouth drops open and her eyes shine with unshed tears.

  “I knew you had to have that bowl and I thought those would look great with it.”

  Cradled gingerly within her left hand is one of the blue glass candlesticks with edged seashells around the base. “It matches my bowl. It’s gorgeous,” she says, those tear filled eyes focused solely on me.

  “I thought they’d be perfect on your table.” Jaime swallows audibly. “I know you don’t have a table right now, since you’re temporarily living with your dad. And that got me thinking. I have a table here. I’d love to come home every night from work and see that bowl and those candlesticks on this table…because you’re here. With me. Every night.”

  Jaime’s eyes widen and her mouth hinges open. “Are you…saying…”

  “I want you to move in with me.”

  She gasps loudly and looks away. I can practically see the wheels in her head spinning a hundred miles per hour.

  “But we haven’t known each other very long,” she whispers, still not looking up at me.

  “I understand that, but it doesn’t bother me. I knew the moment I met you, the moment I first laid eyes on you, that I wanted you. I felt it in my heart that we would have something amazing, and you know I was right.”

  Jaime starts to speak, but I place my finger across her lips. “You said I could finish before you said anything.” I take another deep breath. “Jaime, I love you. I knew weeks ago that I was in love with you; hell, I practically fell in love with you the moment I laid eyes on you. I was just too afraid to say the words then for fear that I’d scare you off or something. I know this is scary, sweetheart. I see it in your eyes that you’re ready to run screaming from this room. Well, I’m not going to let you. We’re good together, I know you feel it too. I don’t want an answer right now. I want you to think about it, really consider it.