Just Married (More than Friends)

by Jenna Bayley-Burke

  She tucked her keys into her handbag and turned to watch Cal appraise the house the way she had, only from his frown she knew he didn’t see the potential. Not that he needed to.

  “It looks like Bert and Helen’s house, but with smaller trees.” He gave a resigned sigh. No, suburban parenting would never suit Callum Kerr. “You would really rather live in a place like this than in New York? It’s almost an hour out of the city.”

  “Absolutely. If the house next door were for sale, I’d buy it and put a gate between the backyards so the kids could play together whenever they wanted.”

  “Who are you and what have you done with Mira?”

  “I feel even more like myself now.” She had changed, all of the sudden and without any desire to go back. The woman he’d married, the life he’d wanted, all of it vanished the moment she found out about the boys. And she knew that wasn’t his fault. “I know everything is different now, and it’s not what you signed on for. That’s why I’m giving you an out.”

  “Your out is insulting. I can’t believe you want me to deny my children.”

  “I want you to want them, and you don’t.” She closed her eyes and pulled in a deep breath, his scent permeating the small space inside the car. Maybe she’d get lucky and she’d be able to get her fix for the next week. Of all the pregnancy cravings, she had to have an unquenchable thirst for his scent. It was about as fair as being desperately in love with a man you couldn’t build a life with.

  “You’re not giving me a chance.”

  “No, I’m not giving in to what you want. There’s a difference.” She looked over at him, the soft brown gaze and winning smile she’d always found such a comfort. Maybe she wasn’t being fair to him, but she was protecting herself, and the boys, from the inevitable end. He wasn’t going to transform into superdad. She was sick of fighting him. He’d see it her way eventually, probably when the boys were spending their nights screaming instead of sleeping.

  She cleared her throat, not sure where to begin. “I want to be able to share the news, but I don’t want it to become a debate in front of everyone.”

  He grinned and she felt as if her car were getting smaller by the second. He hadn’t shaved this weekend, his square jaw shaded with stubble. In his T-shirt and shorts he seemed every bit the boy she’d fallen for back in law school, though this older version was far more lethal. She used to be so attracted to the enigmatic way he took control of everything, but now it was terrifying.

  “I mean it, Cal. We present a united front. I don’t get to fly away. I’m stuck here dealing with the wake of whatever waves you make.”

  “You could come with me to New York.”

  She smoothed her hands along the skirt of her sundress. “Why? You won’t be there.”

  He blinked, as if he’d forgotten he would be back in Europe by the weekend. Or perhaps he didn’t check his schedule that far in advance.

  “Look, let’s just say we’re working on the logistics. Molly is so pregnant we’ll be able to deflect any baby questions onto her.” She could tell he wanted to say more, but she was too keyed up to hear it. She climbed out of the car, the sticky heat of late summer wrapping around her. She checked the sky as she made her way up the driveway and smiled at the cotton clouds drifting their way. The buzz of conversation behind the fence grew louder with each step.

  “Doll, wait.” Cal slammed the car door shut, but she didn’t slow down. His long legs caught up with her anyway. He caught her arm and turned her to face him. “You can’t go in there without your ring.” He held it up, the sun glinting off the huge diamond and nearly blinding her. She winced and he took her hand, slipping the ring in place.

  “This thing is ridiculous. It must have cost a fortune.”

  “Didn’t cost a thing, at least not for me. It was my grandmother’s twenty-year upgrade ring. I figured I might as well start at the top.”

  Knowing it was a family piece made her like it more, feel a part of something. “Now I’m even more worried about losing it.”

  “If it doesn’t suit you we can pick out another. It was the one in the safe I liked best.”

  She glanced down at it again. She’d figured Tonya had picked out the ring like everything else at the wedding.

  Cal cleared his throat. “I think I should tell them. They won’t ask as many questions.”

  He had a good point, but she didn’t know if she trusted him not to tell it like he thought it should be. Which wasn’t how he wanted it at all.

  “Let’s pretend to be happy about this. It’ll be easier than dealing with everyone’s questions.”

  “I don’t have to pretend, Cal. I’m honestly thrilled that I get to tell my best friends I’m pregnant.” She shrugged off his hand and rang the bell.

  “I thought we were best friends,” he muttered behind her.

  “I’m your best friend. It’s been a long time since you even tried to be mine.”

  Molly pulled open the door before he had a chance to reply. Or maybe, he just didn’t have anything to say.

  “Dude, get off my fire pit,” Rob said with a laugh. The kids splashed beside the patio in a blow-up pool shaded by a Hawaiian-print umbrella.

  “I have an announcement.” Cal dismissed the request with a wave of his hand and addressed the adults lounging in the late-afternoon sun. The weather this weekend had started off stormy, but brightened with each passing day. Exactly the opposite of his personal landscape.

  Mira stood, no doubt wanting to break in with her rendition of how things should be.

  “Right,” Cal shot her a sideways grin. He stood on his perch, channeling a mood so light and happy he almost believed it. “We have an announcement.”

  “She made you sell the castle,” Dave guessed.

  “You’re stealing her away to New York, aren’t you?” Molly looked up from the plate of food balanced atop her giant belly.

  “If you’re annulling the marriage,” Rob spoke, leaning back in his Adirondack chair, “I’ll have you know your bride has an excellent attorney. And he may fleece you out of the three Bentleys you have stored in the garage in the Hamptons. You’ll never miss them, and the families who lost bets deserve some kind of retribution.”

  “Listen, you smug prick,” Cal said with a laugh. “You can buy your own damned Bentley. We happen to enjoy being married very much.”

  “Too much information,” Dave said with a shake of his head.

  “Stevie boy, you might want some earmuffs. Because we’re having twins.”

  “You’re fucking what?” Bert blurted out as he came off his chair.

  Helen slapped his chest. “Language!”

  Molly squealed, cubes of watermelon plopping off her plate as she tried to negotiate getting up. He wanted to tell her to sit still, but he doubted that would be well received in this crowd. He hopped down, receiving the hugs and back claps from the guys as Mira was fussed over by the women.

  “When are you due?” Helen asked.

  “Before Valentine’s Day, but it might be sooner. Hopefully they’ll stay put until February.” Mira’s features shone as she smiled. She was genuinely happy, and he hadn’t bothered to notice until now.

  “Wait a minute,” Helen said, “you’ve been pregnant for months and never told us? Is this what the surprise wedding was all about?”

  “I wasn’t holding out,” Cal offered up. “She only told me on Friday.”

  “Wait, what?” Molly shook her head in disbelief

  Mira held up her hands. “I got the surprise of a lifetime at my annual two weeks ago.”

  “Get out!” Helen slapped her shoulder. “You had no idea?”

  “None. I thought the doctor was confusing me with another patient.”

  Molly wrinkled her nose. “You were one of those women who didn’t know she was pregnant! You could have had the baby in a gas station bathroom!”

  His chest tightened. He’d thought finding out she was pregnant was terrifying enough. He had months before the b
abies were a squirming, crying reality. Thank goodness.

  Mira laughed. “I think at some point the babies would have been more obvious.”

  “Twins!” Molly squeezed her again, and then sighed. “I think I peed myself. Cal, don’t look so mortified. There’s a full-size baby on my bladder. It happens.”

  He pulled his hand over his face, hoping to erase whatever Molly saw there. Because from the glare Mira shot him, it wasn’t the right reaction.

  Helen narrowed her eyes. “You haven’t been puking or itchy or had headaches or cravings or—”

  “None of it.”

  “You don’t even look pregnant.” Helen looked her up and down. “You lucky bitch.”

  “Language,” Bert said with a laugh.

  “We’re pregnant together and we didn’t even know it.” Molly stepped closer for a hug. Her big, round belly felt hard between them as she squeezed. “I’m so excited. We can be in a mommy group together. Oh.” She made a face like she’d just stepped in something and grabbed her belly. “Okay then.”

  “Molly?” Rob asked, nearly tripping on a tricycle as he went to his wife.

  Molly wrinkled her nose and tilted her head. “I don’t think I peed after all. I think my water just broke.”

  For some reason the women saw this as reason to celebrate with laughing and clapping. They all just stood there, as if there were no rush at all, no need to get to a hospital. Cal’s skin prickled like the temperature had jumped ten degrees.

  He cleared his throat. “Should we go so you can, you know, get going?”

  Molly leaned back and laughed, that bawdy, too loud laugh he recalled from school. “It’s Labor Day, Cal. It’s a good day to go into labor. But I have hours, maybe a day.”

  “But—” A million things. He cut a glance to Mira, who was grinning. As if this were some kind of cosmic joke. Maybe they were punking him.

  “Oh, Cal, your face.” Molly laughed again, then grimaced. She gripped Rob’s arm and blew out a slow breath. And another. And then it was as if it never happened. “Really, if you get squicked out every time a pregnant woman leaks, you’re in for a long nine months. Or five. You only have five left.”

  It had to be a joke, because everyone was laughing. At him.

  “She’s fine,” Rob said with a smile. “The more relaxed Molly stays, the easier labor can be. And faster. Anna was a marathon.”

  Molly rubbed her belly. “Yep, my water broke.”

  “We’re having a baby!” Mira called out, reaching down for the toddler clinging to her leg. She swooped their goddaughter up in a giggle-fueled hug.

  Anna snuggled close, gripping her shirt as she peeked over at Cal. “Who’s that?”

  “You remember Uncle Cal. He sent your princess bed.” She moved closer, her shoulder brushing against his arm. “And Baby Feed Me.”

  “She doesn’t poop.” Anna wrapped her chubby arms around Mira’s neck.

  Cal managed a nod, confusion and frustration wrestling in his mind. He hated being out of his depth. Went out of his way to ensure it never happened. And yet . . .

  “Say hello to Anna Banana.” They both looked up at him, their cheeks pressed together, expecting him to do something, be something.

  “Hello, Anna.” Mira clearly wanted a different reaction, but for the life of him he couldn’t imagine what that would be. He looked to Rob, who had disappeared, and to Bert who held his own boy, who Bert then tossed in the air. Anxiety shot through him like lightning, still buzzing as Bert caught him and tossed him again.

  Molly approached, taking the baby from Mira. “If you’re still willing to stay with little miss, we might head to the hospital sooner rather than later. Traffic can be a bear on a holiday weekend.”

  “This is really it?” Mira’s voice had a pitch he didn’t recognize, and by the time he turned to look at her, her eyes were glassy and wet.

  “Well, either that or I’ve lost bladder control completely.” She laughed and then her face twisted. She thrust Anna at him.

  Cal wanted to step back, but he took the kid because he worried Molly might drop her on the stamped concrete patio. She felt so small and breakable in his hands, like if he squeezed too tight she’d shatter.

  Molly kept one eye on him as she sank onto a lounge chair and dug her fingers into her thighs. She did those slow breaths, and then burst out laughing. “Why are you holding her like that?”

  “Like what?” He tightened his grip, but Anna kicked and wiggled.

  “Like she’s a bomb,” Mira filled in, taking the toddler and setting her on the ground. “Haven’t you held a baby before?”

  He shook his head. Helen and Bert’s boys climbed all over him, but he’d never picked one up. They just moved into his space like they owned it, usually leaving crumbs in their wake.

  “Holy shit. I think we may be onto something here,” Molly said with a grin. “Laughter is supposed to help with labor, but with Anna I was in no mood. We should throw a party around your due date, or go to a comedy show. Oh, I think I have to pee.”

  Mira helped her up and they watched her waddle back toward the house. He checked his watch. Had it really only been minutes since this all started?

  “You need to calm down.” Mira stroked his arm. “She was in labor with Anna for two days. The more relaxed she is the faster things will progress.”

  “I think it would all progress better at the hospital. Why haven’t they left yet?”

  “I’m sure Rob is loading the car. Can you stay another day?”

  He shook his head. “I have meetings in the morning. I arranged for a car to come get me in an hour, and I’ll sleep on the plane.”

  “But that was before. Don’t you want to see the baby while she’s fresh and new?”

  “You said it could be days before she has the baby. I have a plane to catch.”

  “You own the plane, Kerr. You run the meetings.” She took her hand back, covering her still flat belly. “This is a brand-new baby. Do you even know what that looks like? Aren’t you curious now?”

  He shook his head. “Not at all. I don’t think strangers are meant to see any of this.”

  “These aren’t strangers, these are our best friends. You don’t want to see any of this. Even with your own pregnancy, children. Don’t you see, this is why I need to stay in Seattle? I don’t want to be alone when I’m having these babies.”

  “We have time to discuss that.” He had to find a way to get used to it, to see himself as a dad. He could envision Mira slipping into her role with ease.

  “Discussion closed, Kerr. You want to keep talking about it, talk to a wall. Or an attorney. My offer to let you walk away from this still stands. I know you feel trapped.”

  “How is it you don’t?” Just a month ago they’d wanted the same things, the same freedoms.

  “Because this is what I’ve wanted since my parents died. I wanted a family, but to my aunt I was an inconvenient obligation. It took her less than a week to box up every memory I had of my family in New York and ship it to Seattle. I’ve been holding onto the memory of being loved, of family, ever since. And now I have my own family with our friends and the babies. And whether you want to be a physical presence in it or not, you’ll always be that for me. So go, Kerr. Have a nice life. Don’t ever let anyone make you do something you don’t want to. Be the best you.” She leaned in and kissed his cheek.

  By the time he realized she’d walked away, she was already inside the house.

  But she might as well have been a million miles away.

  13

  Miranda found the best baby monitor according to the three magazines next to her on the couch, and added it to her registry. Her tablet felt hot from all the online shopping, but she didn’t want to call it a night yet. Molly’s stash of pregnancy magazines was much deeper than her own, and she’d made a mental list of things she’d need while going through Anna’s bedtime routine.

  The growing list had her wondering if Cal weren’t right about her condo
being too small. She and the babies didn’t need much space, but all the baby gear needed its own zip code. The television screamed, and she scrambled for the remote, lowering the volume on the woman in the final stages of labor.

  Before she found out she was pregnant, she never realized how many shows were devoted to the topic. This show, chronicling the day of birth, had become a new obsession. It was like exposure therapy, like maybe if she watched enough births she wouldn’t be afraid to go through her own.

  She yawned as she selected another pregnancy magazine from the basket. Rob and Molly had left six hours ago, with Cal disappearing soon after. Everyone else hung out until it was dark, but then headed home to wait for the news. She’d been able to keep her mind off Cal while busy with Anna and their friends, but in the quiet of night, he consumed her.

  She always had a plan, and stuck to it no matter what. But Cal had shaken that path with his surprise wedding. She could have stayed on course, except the babies opened up a route she’d never dreamed of taking. But it wasn’t a highway she wanted to drag Cal down.

  Resentment bred contempt, and she’d rather give him complete freedom than have him begrudge her the way her aunt had. You couldn’t make someone want something they didn’t. This kind of resignation didn’t feel good, nor did the idea of having to deal with their friends once they realized she’d be raising the twins alone. But she couldn’t find any anger; the sadness blanketed every other emotion. Kept her from reaching for the hope that if he’d only try, loving these babies might be just what he needed to heal the hurts of a childhood he was never allowed to have. She knew he’d never allow that kind of vulnerability, so terrified at failing at it he’d rather not even attempt it.

  Molly going into labor had put a spotlight on how uncomfortable Cal was with pregnancy. She’d seen the way he looked at Molly, and his distance this weekend illustrated his disgust with the changes her body would take on to bring the boys here. No longer was her body his wonderland. Neverland. Maybe his mother was right and he truly was a man-child, content to never grow up.