Never Over You

by Ryleigh Andrews

  Rory yawned. Her sweet little boy. She leaned down and kissed both their heads and then she pressed call.

  “Hi,” came the relieved voice of Ethan.

  “Sorry we’re late. Mommy’s a little rusty getting these guys ready,” she said, tickling their knees which caused them to giggle.

  “It’s quite all right. They ready?”

  “Rory’s almost asleep and Pierce is just quietly holding my hand.”

  “They missed you so much,” Ethan said. She’d missed them too. Never again would she be gone that long without seeing them. “Especially at night. My singing voice is awful. They wanted you.”

  “I should’ve recorded something for them.”

  “Next time,” he said, planning a future they might not have.

  “Putting you on speaker now. Rory. Pierce. Say night-night to Daddy.”

  “Night-night, Daddy,” they said in beautiful unison. Pierce yawned and Rory closed his eyes.

  “Night-night, guys. I love you,” Ethan said.

  “Love you, Daddy.”

  “Bonne nuit, mes fils doux. Mommy vous aime.”

  She said that to them every night. Good night, my sweet sons. Mommy loves you. Her father had said a version of this to her when she was younger and she’d kept that tradition going strong. After kissing their foreheads, she tucked the blanket in around them and grabbed her phone and went to the bathroom where she had left a change of clothes for herself. She took out her contacts and put on her glasses. Her eyes ached from all the crying she had done. Probably more tears had been shed today than in the past four years.

  “Mia?”

  Ethan’s voice out of nowhere startled her. She spun around and when she didn’t see him she remembered that she had never hung up the call with her husband.

  “Yes?” she replied, absently undressing.

  “I don’t know what to say.”

  “Maybe it’s best not to say anything,” she snapped back, pulling on a pair of dark gray sweatpants.

  “There’s so much to say,” he added.

  She grabbed her well-worn MSU hoodie, the one she wore whenever she needed to be comforted, and put it on. It was well into June but she felt chilled to the bone.

  “And I don’t want to hear it now. I don’t want to be having this conversation. Don’t you get that?” she yelled at the phone. “I don’t want to have this talk. I never wanted this talk!”

  She wanted the happy life she had before she went on her European tour. But maybe it hadn’t been as happy as she’d thought if this is where she and Ethan were right now.

  “I know.”

  She laughed bitterly. “You know? Then why the fuck is it happening?” she screamed. She heard a rustle in the bedroom. Shit! She didn’t want to wake the boys and quietly left the bedroom and headed downstairs.

  “What the hell is going on with you?” she wondered aloud. “The man I married had too much honor, too much respect for me, to cheat on me, to ruin the beautiful family we had, the life that we worked so hard on.”

  She sat on the step, not able to keep herself up, and felt the tears race to her eyes. She tried to quiet the tears but she was absolutely powerless to stop them, so she cried, sobbed, as her husband undoubtedly listened to the tears wrack through her.

  “Why, Ethan? Why?” she repeated over and over while she cried, the only thought in her head.

  “Mia …”

  “God, this hurts so much, Ethan. I never thought this would happen again. I never thought you’d hurt me like this. I don’t know what to do …” she trailed off, staring at the wall in front of her.

  “Mia, stay here—”

  “I returned early because I missed you so much,” she continued, ignoring his plea. “I wanted my husband to take me in his arms and kiss me. I didn’t expect this … I didn’t expect to come back and have my life turned upside down and I have no fucking clue what to do!”

  “Mia—”

  “I’ve got to go …”

  “No! Please don’t hang up!”

  But she did just that. Still sitting on the stairs, she took a few restorative breaths before heading out to the kitchen. The promised plate of food was at the island, waiting for her. She smiled at the gesture and ate it, not really tasting it, and only ate because of the baby.

  Putting the plate in the sink, she headed over to the family room where she’d earlier spied Allie and Luke sitting on the sofa, watching television. She stopped when she saw Allie resting her head on Luke’s shoulder, not wanting to interrupt such an intimate moment between them. But neither did she want to be alone. She needed the comfort of her two best friends.

  “Hey …” she started, hating that she was intruding. Luke looked over at her and smiled. “Mind if I sit with you for a bit?”

  “Of course not, sweets. When do you ever ask?” he replied.

  “Since today, I guess. It’s been a very weird day.”

  Curling up in a chair, she tried to focus on the show they were watching, something about demon hunters, but her mind kept returning back to the events of the day.

  Was that their last embrace? The last time they were intimate with each other? Ethan said it wasn’t over. He didn’t want it to be over. Did he? Did she? More questions to add to her unanswered list. Like how could this have happened?

  Moving in the chair to adjust her position, her bruised hip hit the arm. She winced and couldn’t stem the tears that very quickly became sobs. Covering her face with both hands, Mia cried and kept on crying even when Luke lifted her out of the chair and brought her to sit between him and Allie. She rested her head on Allie’s shoulder, clutching Luke’s hand like it was a lifeline.

  Eventually her sobs stopped and the numb feeling took over again. She hated feeling like this.

  “What a time to be pregnant. I could really use a drink.”

  “Did you tell Ethan?” Luke inquired, squeezing her hand.

  “No. And I don’t plan on it right now. I do not love the man that did this to me. He needs to find the man I love—the man I married. He’s lost and I don’t even know where to start to look in order to help.”

  Mia

  The next morning, Mia woke up with a smile, having her little boys snuggled up close to her, one little hand wrapped around a couple of her fingers and another grasped around a lock of her hair. She missed mornings like this, the smell of their hair tickling her nose, the calming sound of their soft breathing. The one thing missing was Ethan and that thought had her closing her eyes tight as she fought away the tears.

  With a long, deep breath, she eased herself out of bed and got ready. Then she pulled out a clean outfit for each boy and carried her bags downstairs. She wanted to get to Chicago at a decent time. Grocery shopping needed to be done. There was nothing at the brownstone and these boys had crazy appetites and she was on her own with that. Her assistant, Bree, was still in Europe taking care of a few things for her, and Bridgette was on vacation for the next week. It was supposed to be the perfect time for it. Mia would have just been back and wanting to spend uninterrupted time with her family. No need for the nanny, but she definitely needed her now.

  But in the meantime she was on her own. She needed to find a balance and what better way to do that than to get in the kitchen and cook something. Cooking had always calmed her down.

  She searched the refrigerator and decided to make a frittata. She gathered the ingredients on the counter, pulled out a cutting board, and chopped away. She put the veggies in the heated skillet and turned around to find Luke sitting at the island, a big grin on his face.

  “Hi,” she said with a sheepish smile, feeling like she just got caught. “You don’t mind, do you?”

  “Not at all! I love when you cook.”

  “Thanks! I needed this. When I’m on tour, I go weeks without cooking and I feel so off-balance, loaded with stress. When I’m in the kitchen, the stress goes away.”

  “Really? It stresses me out.”

  She laughed, remem
bering the handful of times Luke had ever been in the kitchen when they were together. “So that’s why I always did the cooking?”

  “Partly. But mostly because your food was just so much better than mine.”

  “Very true,” she said, winking at him. She turned down the heat and started cracking the eggs into a large bowl.

  “Hot!” he said jokingly.

  “You’re one weird dude. How did sweet and serious Allie ever fall for you?”

  “You know why,” he said, quirking his eyebrows.

  “Haha!” she laughed, beating the eggs. She would never admit it now but he was very good. They’d had a lot of sex when they were together and even after they had broken up, they kept coming back for the sex. But now, their relationship was beyond that and the urge to tease him was strong. “I heard it gets smaller as you age.”

  “What? That’s a load of crap!”

  “Is it?” she asked, pouring the eggs into the pan.

  “Seriously, is that true?” he worried.

  “I love you, sweets,” she chuckled.

  “Don’t mess with me like that!” he said with a sigh of relief.

  She laughed some more and put the pan in the oven. While she had him alone, she wanted to ask him something that had been nagging at her since yesterday. “So … why does Allie have pregnancy tests around?”

  “We’ve been trying …”

  This news made her very happy! She couldn’t wait for her best friends to have kids. “Yay!”

  “It’s not going so well.”

  Boo.

  “How long?”

  “Six months.”

  Whoa … they started before getting married.

  “That’s not long.”

  “Well, I’m forty-one and she’s thirty-five and we just keep getting older.”

  “Look at me. I’m going to be thirty-seven and I’m knocked up,” she joked, but she couldn’t believe it was happening. “Going to the doctor?”

  “Yes. She’s been. I’ve been. Done all kinds of tests.”

  “Any closer to finding out?”

  “Everything has come back fine so far. After all that though, we decided to take a break. She was done. It was stressing her out. We’ll probably try again soon.”

  “You guys will get pregnant. I know it. Hurry up though. I want a pregnancy buddy.”

  “You’ve got one,” Allie chimed in, a wide smile on her face as she walked further into the kitchen.

  “What?” Mia exclaimed.

  “You and I have been on pretty much the same cycle for years. And it dawned on me this morning that the last time I had my period was in …”

  “April!” Mia squealed, so excited for Allie and Luke.

  “Took the test and it was positive.” Allie said, standing in front of her husband.

  Luke sat stunned at the counter. One minute he was telling her about their struggles, the next, he’s going to be a daddy again.

  “You’re really pregnant?” he asked, a little fear in his voice. She knew him. He was afraid it might not be true.

  Allie nodded enthusiastically. Mia teared up as Luke left his stool and went to his wife and embraced her. She would not be having this moment with her own husband. She’d waited so long for it—wanted it more than anything, yet it wasn’t going to happen. At least she was able to see the moment for her best friends.

  “I love you,” Luke whispered against her cheek.

  “I love you too,” Allie tearfully replied.

  Mia gave them a few moments to celebrate together before saying quite loudly, “I’m going to be an aunt again!”

  Both laughed at her exuberance and accepted her hugs of congratulations. They’d be bringing a new set of kids into the world this new year. Hopefully they’d be great friends, just like their parents.

  “I’m going to check on the boys,” Mia said, wanting to give Luke and Allie some space. “I’ll be back in a few to finish making breakfast.”

  When she entered the bedroom, Mia saw two sets of wide eyes poking out from the blanket before disappearing under it.

  “Oh … I wonder where my two little boys could be. I was coming to get them for breakfast. Guess that means more for me …” she said, trying not to laugh at the muffled giggles of her sons.

  “Here we are, Mommy,” Pierce said, tossing the blanket off him and his little brother and they both bolted from the bed and headed downstairs.

  They ate and changed then Mia loaded them into the car. She turned to face her best friend and frowned.

  She hated goodbyes.

  “When will you be back?”

  “Your wife knows,” she retorted because she really wasn’t sure—it could be sooner than her next doctor’s appointment or not. It all depended.

  “Mia,” he warned. She knew she tested him at times. Now was one of those. So she changed the topic.

  “Come visit … I get impulsive when bored. Save me from myself. Bring me Kaitlyn!”

  “Oh my God! We have to tell her about the baby! She’ll be so excited.”

  “Tell her, then visit. Plenty of room. Allie knows my schedule. Bree will keep her informed.”

  “We’ll be there. Promise.”

  She tossed her bag in the passenger seat. The boys were quiet with their toy iPads. Hopefully that would be the case for the drive up to Chicago.

  “You okay to drive?” Luke worried.

  “Yeah, I’ll put on music and the boys will fall asleep about an hour in and will hopefully stay that way until I pull into the garage. A nice peaceful ride.”

  “Text me when you arrive,” he said. She knew he was worried about her for many reasons and didn’t like that she was going away.

  “I will.”

  “Call me if you need anything, okay?”

  “I’ll be fine. Sad, but fine.”

  He hugged her tight and then kissed her forehead. “I love you.”

  “I love you too. Oh, before I forget. Thanks for punching Ethan, but now you have to make up with him. He won’t come to you. He’s too ashamed.”

  “I’m pissed at him.”

  “He did nothing to you. He hurt me, not you. I should be the angry one.”

  And I shouldn’t be defending him right now.

  “Are you angry?”

  “I’m plenty angry. Just good at hiding it. Kiss and make up with him. Okay?”

  He grumbled. “I’ll try.”

  “Thank you. If it makes it easier, go ahead and hit him again,” she said with a dark smile. She kissed his cheek and entered her car.

  “Seriously?”

  “What do you think?”

  He laughed. “Okay. Bye, sweets.”

  “Bye,” she said before pulling down the driveway.

  The ride went just as she said it would. Thankfully. They arrived home and she let the boys play in the yard as she brought all their luggage inside. Bridgette had texted her to say that she’d arrive on Wednesday, cutting her vacation short. Mia would make sure to pay her to make up for that.

  So Mia would have the boys for five days by herself. She knew that she could do it. It had just been awhile since she had done so. Since their first year.

  Taking a seat on the step, she watched the boys run around outside. She’d give them a half-hour to play before they headed to the grocery store.

  “Oh, God,” she groaned. Two rambunctious boys in a grocery store. This wouldn’t be fun. She needed reinforcements. Now who would she pick? Marty, Clark, or Todd? She did eeny, meeny, miny, moe, and landed on Marty.

  “Hi, Marty,” she said brightly when he answered the phone.

  “What’s up, brat?”

  “I’m in Chicago.”

  “Really? I thought you were heading back to Indy …”

  “I did,” she replied shakily.

  “Mia, what’s wrong?”

  “Can you come over?”

  “Of course. Give me twenty minutes.”

  True to his word, like always, Marty entered the backyard
only to be tackled by her sons. As he played with the boys, she saw the question in his eyes. Where’s Ethan?

  Eventually the boys let him up and he sat by her side and as she told him what had happened, he remained silent and listened, his hand holding hers, supporting her.

  “Oh, Mia …” he said when she finished.

  “It gets better … or worse, depending on how you look at it.”

  He looked up from the boys. “What do you mean?”

  “I’m eight weeks pregnant.”

  “You’re pregnant?”

  She smiled. “I am.”

  He leaned over and kissed her cheek. “Congrats. I can see you’re happy about this.”

  “Just this part. The rest? I’m a big ol’ mess.”

  “Whatever you need, know that Bekah and I are here for you.”

  “I’m glad you said that. I need a favor.”

  “Of course.”

  “I have to go grocery shopping and there are two options. One, you can come with me and the boys, or two, you can stay here with them while I shop.”

  “Uh … option one,” he said, looking a bit scared.

  “Thanks. I owe you.”

  “Man, this sounds scary.”

  She laughed. He had a right to be scared. “That’s why I called you. I needed reinforcements.”

  Mia

  Chicago, June 2015

  For the first week, Ethan left Mia alone, only calling at night to talk to the boys before they went to bed. She made sure they were plenty exhausted at that time. She took them running with her every day along the lake. They went to the zoo. She took them shopping for more clothes and a small pool that she set up in the backyard. And with that, they spent their afternoons playing outside in the pool. The constant activity plus being two months pregnant added up to an exhaustion she had not seen in years.

  She was happy when Bridgette arrived mid-week to help. She was even happier that Bridgette was back when she received a text from Ethan asking if he could see the boys sometime that weekend. She replied back with Saturday, saying that they had plans on Sunday. They really didn’t, but he didn’t need to know that.

  She was nervous about seeing him, especially with the boys around. She didn’t know how she’d react and she didn’t want the boys to see that and sense something was wrong.