True Colors

by Krysten Lindsay Hager

“I was in a hurry today — I mean, look at my hair,” I said.

  “Yeah, I guess. Here, borrow my brush,” she said. I thought it was cool she’d share her brush with me because Ericka never let anybody borrow hers.

  “Landry, your hair looks fine,” Peyton said.

  My hair got even flatter when I brushed it and I didn’t have a rubber band, but Peyton took the clip out of her hair for me. India started brushing her hair with Devon’s brush next, and her hair was like silk. It almost reached the back of her pants. It was a perfect honey color and looked amazing with her aqua eyes. She, Devon, and Peyton always looked so good without even trying, and I felt like such a blob next to them. Peyton had amazing dark red hair and matching reddish-brown eyes, but she always managed to make me feel good about myself, even if I was having an ugly day.

  Later, when we were heading to our lockers, I saw Stuart walk up behind Thalia and trip her. Her bag was open and stuff went flying all over the hall. He moved away from her, and it looked like she had tripped over her own feet. Devon rolled her eyes.

  “What a klutz,” she said.

  India sidestepped Thalia’s math book, and Peyton bent down to pull out some papers stuck under Devon’s foot.

  “Devon, watch it. You almost ripped her homework,” Peyton said. Thalia was scrambling to grab her pens and pencils as they rolled down the hall. Kyle picked up a math test and announced she had gotten a sixty-eight percent on it. He held it up like he was going to play keep-away with it but then handed it to her.

  “Loser,” Thalia said as she pulled the paper away from him.

  I knew Thalia had said it because it was what Arianna called him right before they broke up. I handed Thalia the stuff I picked up, and Kyle looked at me.

  “Landry, did you get the math homework done? Can I borrow it?” he asked, flashing me a smile.

  I usually let him copy a problem or two, but I lied and said I didn’t finish it. Let Yasmin do his homework for him. Thalia went on about what a jerk Kyle was as we walked to class.

  “No wonder Arianna dumped his butt. He’s so immature and short,” she said. “Like he did any better on the test.”

  “He’s got girl hands, too,” I said. She smirked as Ms. Ashcroft walked in. Thalia passed me a note saying she hoped Yasmin would break up with him. I wrote back I didn’t care. Why did guys always go for the Yasmins and Ariannas of the world? I mean, just because they were cute, super athletic, got good grades in math, had perfect hair and—

  “Landry?” asked Ms. Ashcroft.

  Thalia elbowed me. “Number fifteen,” she whispered. Oops, I didn’t have an answer down.

  “Cumbersome,” Thalia said under her breath.

  I repeated it and shot her a grateful look. Stupid Kyle. We had computer class this week, and Ashanti, Thalia, and I sat at the same computer station. We were supposed to do typing drills where we type sentences over and over until the stopwatch goes off to see how many words we can type in a minute. We’re supposed to type with a piece of paper over our hands so we can’t look at the keyboard, but I sit far enough in the back so I can peek.

  “Landry, Tad’s staring at you,” Thalia said. “He was looking at you in homeroom, but I thought it was because you zoned out.”

  “Maybe he likes you,” Ashanti said. “Too bad you already have a man.”

  At first, I thought she was making fun of me for liking Kyle, but then I realized she was talking about Cristian.

  “So what do you wanna do for your birthday?” Ashanti asked.

  “Not sure yet.”

  I hadn’t even thought about it since Mom had been busy picking out a new carpet for the basement for the last week.

  ****

  Mom was in a bad mood when I got home because the carpet guys had come late and she had taken time off from work to be there for them.

  When I got home, I went downstairs and the basement had an overpowering new carpet smell. It seemed a lot bluer than the little square mom had showed me, but it looked okay. I asked my mom what we were going to do for my birthday.

  “Do you want to go out to dinner with some of your friends?” she asked.

  “Okay, so Devon, Peyton, India, Ashanti, Thalia, Tori, and Ericka,” I said.

  “It might be cheaper to have them come over for pizza and cake,” she said.

  “A sleepover?” I said.

  “Well…I guess,” she sighed. I said we could sleep in the basement, but she said it was too cold, but we could use the living room. I called Devon first. Pretty soon Devon, Peyton, Ashanti, Thalia, Ericka, and India were all coming, but Tori couldn’t make it. She said she had to stay home and watch her little cousins, but we could get together next weekend at her house. Ashanti was surprised Tori wasn’t coming.

  “Couldn’t her brother watch them or something? It’s your fourteenth birthday and she’s, like, one of your best friends,” she said.

  “I dunno.”

  “Well, what do you want for your birthday?”

  “I don’t know. Colin to ask me out?” I said.

  “What if he has plans?”

  “He’d change ‘em for me.”

  Dad called and said he was going to take the train in for my birthday. I wanted to ask if he had found any jobs here yet, but he was busy and got off the phone pretty quick. Mom wanted to know what I wanted for my birthday. The only thing I could think of was the new TV Dad wanted. I figured it was too expensive and she raised her eyebrows, but she didn’t say no right away.

  ****

  It was so hard to pay attention in class that week. All I could think about was my party and Dad coming over. I was in my own world and even Yasmin hanging all over Kyle in the hall couldn’t upset me. Well, as much anyway. While I was counting down to my party, Arianna had broken up with Stuart twice and Cristian had written me once. Devon said I should tell him my birthday was on Saturday, but I didn’t want to act like I wanted him to buy me something. His e-mails seemed more like a friend thing, so I forwarded it to Ashanti and she called me after she read them.

  “Okay, it seems like he doesn’t want to say too much… maybe he wants to see how you feel first,” she said.

  “I knew it. He just wants to be friends,” I said. I was disappointed, but a little relieved.

  “Maybe not. He does say maybe he’ll see you at another game. And Landry, the fact he wrote you at all is pretty good. Halle used to e-mail Stuart all the time, and he didn’t write back too often,” she said.

  “How often does Jay write you?” I asked.

  “Well, I read in this book of my mom’s you shouldn’t write the guy right back. You sort of make him hang for a while, and he should e-mail you three times more than you e-mail him,” she said.

  “Oh wow. Do you wait before you write back?” I asked.

  She said she waited a little bit, but not too long.

  “Maggie e-mails guys right back and they like it, but Yasmin makes ‘em wait and they like her, too, so I don’t know,” she said. “Do you like Cristian?”

  I made her promise not to make fun of me and told her I was a little freaked out by him.

  “He’s cute… maybe too cute. I dunno. I like him, but I don’t know what to say to him. He’s nice, but he makes my stomach hurt,” I said.

  “What do you mean?” she asked.

  “Sometimes I get so nervous it feels like I’m going to throw up. You know, like butterflies and stuff. Plus, I still have a huge crush on the basketball player. I know there’s no way anything could ever happen with him, but… he’s so hot,” I said.

  “He did look cute in the program you showed me,” she said. “You’re not far apart age-wise. And maybe he’ll flunk a grade, but would you want him if he was held back?”

  “I wouldn’t care if he couldn’t count. All he has to do is sit there and look cute,” I said.

  “My mom says the same thing about my Bradley. Did you watch today’s show?” she asked.

  “Yeah, I bet you died when he walked out of the sh
ower,” I said.

  “Best. Episode. Ever.”

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Devon asked me to go to the away game on Friday. Her dad was willing to drive India, Peyton, and me to Bentley High, but my mother said she didn’t want me to go out the night before the fashion show.

  “Mom, it’s just a stupid kids’ fashion show. Nobody’s going to be there. The store is, like, the size of our living room,” I said.

  “No. End of discussion.”

  I told Devon I couldn’t go, and she wasn’t happy. “Well, can you go shopping with India and me tomorrow?”

  “What time? The show starts at noon,” I said.

  She said they were leaving at noon. She was starting to sound bored, so I said maybe I could meet her at the mall after the fashion show. I told her to leave her cell phone on, and I’d call her when I was done.

  “If my phone has any battery left,” she said. I thought it was weird to say since she could just charge her phone overnight. I told her I’d probably be done by two o’clock.

  “Call me, I guess. If we’re still there.”

  Devon always stayed at the mall forever, but all of a sudden, now she wants to shop for just two hours?

  I got up early on Saturday morning. I checked my e-mail before I got in the shower, but nobody had bothered to e-mail me about the game. I washed my hair and put on my makeup while it air dried. Delilah had told me to hold off on using heated hair appliances since they can wreck your hair. I put on some navy shadow liner around my eyes like I had seen in Young and Fun and used some of my mom’s bronzing powder. I thought I looked hot, but when I got to the show, Kasia, the owner, asked me to wipe off some of the eye makeup.

  We had to change in the backroom, and I felt weird being the only girl there who wore a bra. One of the assistants came over to help me with my outfit. I had to wear the ugliest dress first, but it wasn’t like some major talent scout was sitting in the Wee Fashions audience. I felt more confident since, because they were all kids, for once I was the hottest girl there. I didn’t even worry about tripping because there were only thirty people there, so what did it matter if I fell? It wasn’t like I was going to get discovered today anyway. It was mostly for experience and for my modeling resume. My hair got staticky after I pulled the sweatshirt on for the last outfit, so one of the assistants ran over and twisted my hair up in a bun. It looked cute, so I left it up after the show. Kasia came back afterward and thanked us all for being in the show.

  “You were all wonderful,” she said. “Help yourself to some refreshments after you change.”

  I wanted to leave right away to meet Devon and India at the mall, but mom said I couldn’t be rude and she made me stay. I drank some watered down fruit punch and ate a lemon bar while my mom talked to some of the parents. I knew it would take a half hour to get from here to the mall, but my mom said it would be “unprofessional” to just take off when the show was over. I tried talking to one of the ten-year-old models and got depressed after finding out she had been working since she was six and had already done a ton of commercials. All the girls had been working way longer than I had. Mom said we could go, but when I called Devon her phone wasn’t on. I left a message for her to call me back.

  “What do you want to do?” Mom asked.

  I told her to take me to the mall, and maybe I could find them.

  “You’ll never—”

  “I gotta go. Devon will get mad if I don’t show up.”

  Mom took me to the mall, and I went to all the stores I thought she could possibly be in. It wasn’t a huge mall, but it felt enormous as I ran around trying to find them. I tried calling Devon again, but there was no answer, so we went home.

  Devon called me fifteen minutes later and said she and India had left the mall early to get their hair done together.

  “We both just got an inch taken off, but they straightened my hair and did it in these cool loose waves. It looks hot,” she said.

  I had never gone to get my hair done with one of my friends before. It seemed like a best friend thing to do, and I felt incredibly left out. She asked how my fashion show went, and we talked for a while. She didn’t seem mad I hadn’t met her, but she seemed… different somehow. I tried not to worry about it as we talked about my upcoming birthday party.

  ****

  On Friday, everyone came over for the party. Ashanti had brought a magazine and wanted us to do a quiz in it on how well you knew your friend. Since it was my birthday, she had me fill out the answers and they all had to guess. I thought Devon would know me the best, but she got the second lowest score and India got the lowest. Peyton and Ashanti had perfect scores, and Ericka only had one wrong. Devon sat with her arms folded.

  I opened my presents after we finished dessert. Thalia had tied a chocolate rose to her gift bag and inside was a designer makeup bag with a picture of New York City on it. It came with a set of makeup brushes inside, and she had bought a Little Rose lip gloss to put inside the bag. It was perfect to take on my modeling jobs. India gave me a University of Michigan sweatshirt, but it had the new clothes smell, which always gave me a headache.

  Ericka gave me a bunch of hair things, and Peyton gave me a book on writing and a journal. I wanted to save Devon’s present for last, so I opened Ashanti’s gift next. Ashanti had made my card out of a collage of Colin pictures, and she gave me a blue shiny purse, which matched her pink one, but was in my favorite color. She told me to look inside and there was a DVD of A Moment to Die, which was an independent film the actor who played Colin had done a year ago. I thought it was weird she didn’t remember our machine wasn’t working, but then she looked at my mom.

  “Whoops,” Ashanti covered her mouth with her hand.

  Mom was laughing. “I told Ashanti I got a new one to replace the broken one when she called to find out what you wanted for your birthday. You’re going to have to act surprised in front of Dad when you open it and see the new TV.”

  I was shocked my mom had actually bought it. Did this mean my dad would be moving in soon? I couldn’t ask her then, so I went back to opening gifts. I thought Devon’s present would be some cool best friend thing, but it was a plain pink scrapbook. I told her I loved it and flipped through the blank pages. We all decided to spread out our sleeping bags and have more cake, but India said she felt sick from all the soda she drank. She sprawled out on the couch, and I hoped she wouldn’t puke on it.

  Peyton asked if she could look through my photo album. Thalia leaned over and said my cousin Bryan was hot.

  “Devon, are you going to leave my dad for him?” Peyton asked. Devon threw my stuffed mouse at her, but Peyton caught him before he hit the floor. I stuck my mouse in the closet and then pointed out the pictures of Brad’s sister, Lucy. I told them how my grandma thought they were both perfect.

  “Look on the bright side, maybe your cousins hate your guts because they hear about what a brilliant writer and model you are,” Thalia said. We all cracked up.

  Devon wanted to call Doug and Cristian, but I felt stupid calling them. Ashanti could tell I didn’t want to call them and suggested we play truth or dare instead.

  “Truth or dare’s for kids,” Devon said.

  Ashanti didn’t get upset, but you could tell she wasn’t happy. I tried to change the subject and asked Peyton to French braid my hair. India kept saying her stomach hurt, and Devon told her to move her sleeping bag next to hers when we went back into the living room.

  “Let’s watch videos,” Ashanti said.

  Devon rolled her eyes, but I said it sounded okay. Devon and India moved behind me, and I started to feel uncomfortable because they were sitting so far away from the rest of us. My favorite video, “Kick Me When I’m Down,” came on, but I kept wondering if India and Devon were whispering stuff about me. Then Devon said she and India were going to sleep in my room if we were just going to watch videos all night. Ashanti sighed, and I suggested we see what else was on because I didn’t want Devon to get mad at me. We f
ound a horror movie about a toxic waste spill in a cemetery, and the chemicals made dead people come back to life. It was almost too stupid to be scary — almost.

  “Landry, I’ve got to go to the bathroom super bad. Will you come with me?” Ericka asked.

  “You know where it is,” Devon said.

  “Uh, zombies,” Ericka said.

  “They don’t exist,” India said rolling her eyes.

  “Fine, I’ll just go right here on the floor,” Ericka said. I had to go to the bathroom anyway and had been waiting for someone else to go first. Ashanti and Peyton went with us, and we took turns going while the rest of us stood outside the door. Ashanti made us talk to her through the door so she’d know we were still there. Devon came over and said we should hide in the basement to freak her out, but I said I didn’t want to leave Ashanti by herself. Devon gave me a funny look so I said I was afraid to go in the basement at night.

  “You guys, I don’t hear talking,” Ashanti said through the door. Peyton whispered we were all there, and she better hurry up if she didn’t want a flood.

  We went back to the movie, and all of the girls fell asleep except for Peyton and me. We decided to watch another movie to calm us down and tried to ignore the fact there was a cemetery not too far from my house. Peyton said the cemetery around the corner was super old so even if those people did come alive, they probably wouldn’t be able to run after us like the ones in the movie. Then we started to picture what they might look like and freaked ourselves out. She stopped talking after a while, and I couldn’t tell if she was asleep or not so I switched the TV off.

  I woke up around four in the morning, and Devon was sleeping with her mouth open. My sleeping bag was twisted around, and it was uncomfortable lying on the rough zipper. I got up to straighten it out, and Peyton looked up. I moved my sleeping bag sideways so it was next to hers.

  “Happy birthday,” she whispered. “Do you feel any different?”