Something to Curse About (Discord Jones)

by Gayla Drummond

  He probably didn’t care one way or the other, but I did. It felt respectful.

  After I’d turned off the light and climbed into bed, Leglin jumped up on the other side and plopped onto his side, back to me.

  “Ronnie’s been after me about moving into a house again,” I said, watching the shadow of the tree outside my bedroom window dance across the mini blinds. He grunted, turning his ear back. “You know, because it’s easier to set wards on a house since it doesn’t share walls with other people’s homes.”

  He grunted again.

  “Derrick’s paying my credit card bill for my car repairs, and I saved my bonus from Thorandryll’s case.” I rolled over onto my side and scratched the hound’s neck. “I saved last year’s Christmas bonus too, and I’ve put money in savings every check. Dad taught me to do that.”

  Thump.

  “Anyway, I think I have enough to make a good down payment. You could have your own room and a yard. That’d be cool, right?”

  Grunt.

  “Is that a yes?”

  Thump.

  “I’m thinking a three bedroom, so we’d have a guest room. It’s just,” I hesitated, scratching under his chin. “There’s a lot more things to worry about when you buy a house. Stuff you don’t have to deal with when you rent an apartment.”

  “Hrr?”

  “If something breaks, I tell the apartment manager, and she sends a maintenance guy or whatever. I don’t have to pay for it or worry about getting someone to fix it.”

  Leglin grunted again.

  “So it’s a big deal. A big responsibility. It’s scary.”

  The hound snorted, and I laughed, rolling back onto my back. “Okay, not as scary as fighting demons or vampires, but it’s still scary. Night, roomie.”

  Thump, thump.

  ***

  Barely three hours later, my tracking sense flared, yanking me from a nightmare of having a house falling apart around my ears. I groaned, seeing the thin black thread it presented me with. “Great, a new color.”

  Leglin sat up and yawned.

  “Go back to sleep, dude. I’ll call Nick, and if I need you, I’ll call you.” He plopped back down as I threw the covers off and hurried to dress.

  Five minutes later, I locked the door behind me and shrugged into my leather jacket. While walking to my car, I called Nick, only to be shunted directly to voice mail. In a fit of sleep-deprived pique, I didn’t leave a message.

  It didn’t matter. If I needed back-up, all I had to do was say Leglin’s name, and the hound would come to me, wherever I was.

  It was a nifty bonus of the magical blood bond between us—though I still didn’t like that it made the hound a servant of sorts. I yawned my way out of the parking lot, enjoying the purring of my car’s engine.

  I realized the thread led into the Palisades and muttered a few choice words. The last time I’d left my car unattended in that area resulted in the need for its nearly complete rebuilding by Logan.

  Making a U-turn, I parked it under a working light in the lot of the strip mall across the highway from the Palisades. After locking it, I focused on a familiar memory and teleported into the warzone, as the Santo Trueno Daily loved to label the Palisades.

  The thread held, its darkness leading me down several streets and into an alley. I poked around the spot it ended, but didn’t find anything. “Not useful. Thanks for nothing.”

  As I straightened, the soft sound of a footstep came to my ears. Before I could turn around, an arm slid across my throat and began applying pressure. I grabbed for a hold, intending to try and throw him over me.

  “You’re an irritating, interfering little bitch,” my attacker muttered. “I made this one just for you.”

  With that, he bent us backward and poured something nasty-tasting into my gasping mouth. I tried to spit it out, but he proved faster, dropping the bottle and slapping his hand over my mouth and nose.

  The liquid, thick and sour, slid down my throat and my vision went dark.

  Looked like I’d found the guy responsible for cursing people.

  TEN

  Upon regaining consciousness, I clambered to all fours while opening my eyes, and froze. My hands were gone. In their place were two bony white paws tipped with short nails. I fell over with a thump when my gaze focused on the black nose at the end of a black and white muzzle.

  Climbing to my feet—paws—again, I bent and tucked my head to look under me. Yep, I was a dog, with white hair, pink belly, and hind legs ending in two more bony-looking paws. A long, black and white tail tucked between my hind legs as I watched.

  Holy crap. Crazy Curseman had turned me into a dog.

  I looked up, and then around, realizing I was still in the same alley. My clothes were gone, along with my keys, wallet, and cell phone. Okay, don’t panic.

  Kate and the coven could break this spell. I just had to get to them. Closing my eyes, I pulled up an image of my office and tried to teleport.

  Nothing happened.

  I tried to call fire, to lift a rotting piece of newspaper, and finally, since I was in the Palisades, to contact Logan telepathically.

  Not a damn thing resulted from those attempts, and a whimper escaped as realization crashed down onto me: For the first time in my entire life, I was truly alone. Worse, my abilities were gone, leaving me utterly helpless.

  Numbness filled me, but I tried walking and made my way to the end of the alley. Everything seemed quiet, and I crept around the corner to look up at the street sign, wanting to know exactly where I was. My ears kept flicking, which felt extremely weird, and it took me a couple of minutes to make the letters be letters.

  Wasn’t a street name I knew.

  Turning, I saw my reflection in the large window of the corner store, and walked over for a better look. Ears flattening, I saw a largish, black and white mutt staring back. Definitely not as large as Leglin, and probably part Border Collie from the coloration, but not as long-haired. I turned my head from side to side. At least I’m not an ugly dog.

  I opened my mouth, lips quivering upwards. Long, wicked looking canines appeared. I closed my mouth, lips falling back into place. Okay, maybe I’m not entirely helpless. I’m not little, and I have big, sharp teeth. My stomach gurgled. And I’m hungry.

  Not dog enough to Lassie my way home, I decided the closest safe place was Logan’s garage. At least, it would be if lion and tiger shifters didn’t consider dogs chew toys. I hoped they didn’t. My immediate issue would be finding it.

  I turned away from the shop window to look around the street. Nothing looked familiar on this block, so I trotted down to the next, pausing to look both ways before crossing. In the middle of the street, a better idea struck, and I halted to act on it, mentally calling Leglin.

  Being magically bound to me, the hound could come when I called him, whether out loud or mentally, no matter how far apart we were.

  At least, that’s what was supposed to happen.

  It didn’t. Maybe Crazy Curseman’s magic was stronger or something.

  I heaved a big sigh and began trotting again. Three blocks down, I spotted the little fast food joint where Nick had bought burritos for us during a previous trip to the Palisades. It offered some orientation, and after standing still for a few minutes, I had a mental map of how to reach the garage.

  Progress! I set off at a run, my paws thumping across cement and asphalt, and quickly learned to slow down when making turns. The weight of my tail threw me off on the first one, my hind end going sideways while my front paws scrabbled for purchase.

  I hoped I wouldn’t stay a dog long enough to figure out all the fine tuning of four-legged locomotion. Proceeding at a lope instead of dead run, I put the brakes on two streets away from the garage as a light breeze brought a new smell to my nose.

  It seemed familiar, and I sniffed, attempting to figure out why. Another deep sniff caused an explosive sneeze, briefly clearing my nose. I took a more cautious sniff, catching the smell again, a
nd realized why it seemed familiar. The scent was the same as the taste of Logan’s kiss, the night we’d shared Thorandryll’s bed and I’d accidentally dragged the shifter into a retro-cognition dream.

  Rich, nutty, and slightly sweet. I lifted my head, looking down the block on my left. There were cars parked along the curb, blocking my view of the other side of the street. I moved past them, still couldn’t see because of more cars parked on the other side, and hurried across to slip between two.

  Excitement seized me when I saw a dark figure walking down the block, away from me. The smell had grown stronger. Logan had told me, back when we first met, that he liked to take late-night walks. It had to be him.

  I ran after him, catching up faster than expected, and he halted as I collapsed at his feet. My legs had tangled when I tried to stop and turn, dumping me on my side. He looked down as I looked up, rolling to my back and waving all four legs in the air to untangle them. “Well, hello.”

  Man, am I glad to see you! The guy throwing curses around turned me into a dog. Can you believe that? I need a ride to David’s, like pronto.

  Logan pulled his hands from his pockets and squatted while I managed to sit up. He held the back of one hand toward my nose. Some automatic reflex made me sniff it. He smiled. “Are you lost, little girl?”

  Crap, he can’t hear me. If it looks like a dog…I sighed, staring at his face. He slowly reached to begin scratching behind my left ear. “I guess you’re okay with shifters, huh? Good girl.”

  He scratched a little harder, and to my embarrassment, my spine curved, one hind paw bouncing on the sidewalk. Ear scratches felt good. I vowed to scratch behind Leglin’s ears more often.

  You know, if I ever had hands again.

  The shifter stopped scratching, both his hands sliding down my neck and halfway down my sides. “No collar, but well-fed and not very dirty. You haven’t been lost too long.”

  I whined, trying to catch his eyes again. Logan’s narrowed as he stared into mine. “Now, that’s odd.”

  What? I wondered, feeling my tail begin to wag. He ruffled the fur on the back of my neck before standing.

  “Why don’t you come home with me, girl? I’ll take you to a vet tomorrow, and see if you have one of those microchips so we can get you home to your family.”

  Jumping to my paws, I said “Yes!” but it came out as a bark. The shifter smiled again, bending slightly to pat my head. “Good girl. Come on.”

  Note to self: Logan really is a good guy. I fell in on his left, walking with him. Apparently, finding a stray dog ended his walk for the night, because he led the way to the garage.

  For the moment, I had safety with someone I knew. Definitely a step in the right direction. I couldn’t help but feel a little proud of myself. As far as I knew, no one had even realized I was missing yet, and I’d already managed to make contact with a friend.

  Soames stood guard, and raised both eyebrows as he saw me standing next to Logan. “A dog?”

  “She’s lost, and seems to like shifters okay.” Logan shrugged. “I’m going to try and find her owner.”

  “Okay.” The other shifter stepped aside, and locked the door once we’d walked through. Logan’s fingertips brushed the top of my head.

  “This way, girl. Sorry, we have to climb stairs.”

  Crap. I hoped I could make it up them.

  ***

  I did, but only because Logan picked me up after I took a tumble down a few on the third set when a back paw missed the edge of one. He put me down right outside his apartment’s door, opened it, and waved me inside while calling, “Hey, Terra, look what I found.”

  The teen came out of her bedroom. Her eyes widened, and she took a half step backward. “That’s a dog.”

  “Yes, a real dog, not an elf hound, and she’s friendly. It’s okay.” His assurance didn’t soothe her, because she stayed exactly where she was. A faint, acrid smell wafted from her. I didn’t like it, and sat down just inside the door. It clicked when Logan closed it. He dropped down to one knee beside me, putting his hand on my shoulders. “I wouldn’t bring home a threat. She’s lost, and hasn’t even growled once. It’s okay.”

  Terra edged forward a few inches, her pale green gaze never leaving my face. “It’s staring at me.”

  He ruffled my neck fur. “Yeah, she does that.” He’d emphasized the “she” and moved to stroking the top of my head. “But it’s really okay.”

  “I can’t believe you brought a dog home.” She moved sideways to sit on the couch, and pulled her knees to her chest. “A big dog.”

  The acrid scent had grown stronger, and I sneezed before dropping to my belly and scraping a paw over my muzzle. The teen froze, her eyes so wide I thought her eyeballs might pop out. Call me slow, but it was only then that I realized she was afraid of me.

  Well, of Doggy Me.

  A soft whine worked its way out of my throat, and I sat up, turning to look at Logan. Why was she scared of dogs? Okay, I could understand shifters being afraid of elf hounds, since those were used to hunt them, but scared of normal dogs?

  Terra could shift and eat a dog my size for lunch. A Chihuahua wouldn’t even be a snack for most shifters.

  He put his arm around my shoulders, his other hand rising to scratch my chest. I leaned into him, suddenly worried her fear might end with her jumping on me and biting my head off or something. “Do we have any leftovers from dinner? She’s probably hungry and thirsty.”

  “Yeah.” She unwound her arms from around her legs and slowly unfolded them. Her feet touched the worn carpeting, and after watching me for several seconds, Terra stood. “You’re sure she’s not going to bite me?”

  “Some normal dogs like cats. Maybe she’s one of them.” Logan didn’t rise, and kept his arm around me. “All I know is she came right up to me while I was out. Flopped at my feet and showed her belly. She didn’t growl at Soames when we came in either. Pretty sure she’s okay.”

  I did not show my belly. I tripped.

  Of course, he couldn’t hear me. I sighed and lay down, my muzzle propped on my legs. This was going to take some getting used to.

  ELEVEN

  I woke up the next morning to a confusing welter of scents. The disorientation made me briefly forget what had happened and where I was. Long enough to flail around and fall off the bed with a loud yelp bursting out when I hit the floor. The comforter dropped on top of me.

  “Easy, little girl.” Logan scooted off the bed to kneel beside me, and began untangling me from the comforter. “Just a minute.”

  Untangled, I stood and shook. After a second, I shook again because it felt good and weird, my skin sliding back and forth over my shoulders and back. With a chuckle, he patted my head and rose. “You meant to do that, right?”

  Oh, absolutely, because I love to embarrass the hell out of myself at every opportunity.

  “We’ll have breakfast, and then I’ll take you to the closest vet.”

  While that sounded good, there was something else I really needed about then. Logan disappeared into his bathroom. It’d been a relief to discover he slept in sweat pants. I went to the bedroom door, which he hadn’t shut completely, and nosed it open. Terra stood at the kitchen counter, reading the back of a box of pancake mix. She glanced my way, her lips compressing into a thin line.

  I whined, padding to the front door. She ignored me. Come on, Terra. I don’t want Logan taking me for walkies.

  That would be far too embarrassing once I was human again. At my next, louder whine, she put the box down and frowned at me. “What?”

  I pawed the bottom of the door, wagging my tail.

  The teen sighed. “You need to go outside?”

  I bounced up and down before pawing at the door again.

  “All right. I guess I can take you out to the yard.”

  Oh, thank you.

  Unfortunately, I’d forgotten about the stairs. Terra started down, noticed I wasn’t beside her any longer, and stopped. She looked over her sh
oulder. “Well, come on.”

  Crap. I half-crawled down a few, placing each paw carefully. She bounced down to the landing, turning to watch my descent. By the time I reached it, I was shaking. Stairs were difficult with four legs and no arms.

  The future tiger Queen of Santo Trueno stared down, her brows drawn together while she nibbled her bottom lip. I looked away, toward the next set of stairs, and felt my tail curl until it was between my legs and against my belly.

  “You’re scared of stairs.” Her fingertips brushed my ear. “Okay. Don’t bite me.”

  Before I could look at her, she’d bent and hefted me, one arm under my rear, the other across my chest. I almost peed when she took the first couple of steps, certain she’d trip and we’d both go tail over tea kettle.

  We didn’t. Her faint wobble disappeared, and we thumped down to the next landing, then the following two without any trouble. Once on the first floor, she put me down and grinned. “There, that wasn’t so bad. Right?”

  You asking me, or yourself? I wagged my tail, noticing the acrid smell of her fear was nearly gone. Still grinning, Terra patted my head before leading me down the hallway to a door at the back. It opened onto a small, fenced area full of old and new overgrowth.

  I found a hidden spot as quickly as possible, and concentrated on the day ahead. Fortunately, my doggy body didn’t need instructions on how to take care of business. Finished, I stepped forward and kicked dirt like I’d seen real dogs do.

  When I rejoined Terra at the door, she patted my head again. “Good girl.”

  The smell of fear had completely disappeared. I guess helping her get over her dog phobia could be counted as a plus to the situation. We went back inside, and she coaxed me up the stairs, appearing ready to catch hold if I tripped or fell.

  By the time we walked into the apartment, Logan was ready to leave.

  “I was going to cook pancakes,” Terra protested.