Better Together: Boys of Talbert Hall #3

by Ward, Quinn

  I needed to apologize. A whole fucking lot. Not because anyone expected it of me, but because I really did want this year to go better. That included reconnecting with the guys who’d been my friends since our freshman year and maybe getting to know the new guys.

  2

  Colin

  “Don’t take this personally, but I need to be as far away from you as possible,” I told Chase as we waited for the elevator to return to the ground floor. I wasn’t happy about being forced to share a suite with my older brother, but I also wasn’t going to be a dick about it. I knew damn well that most freshmen would give their right nut not to be stuck in a shitty ass dorm. That didn’t mean I wanted to hear what Chase and his boyfriend, Jayden, got up to.

  “No offense taken.” It seemed like Chase breathed out a sigh of relief, as if he wasn’t happy either. “The good news is the four room suites are pretty big. We won’t even have to see one another if you’d rather forget that you’re stuck rooming with me. I don’t want you feeling like I’m babysitting you.”

  That was exactly what our parents were hoping for. As far as they were concerned, I was too irresponsible to live on my own. They would have much rather I enrolled in community college so I could have stayed under their roof and under their thumbs. But that’s not why I didn’t want to be close to Chase. If anything, I honestly thought this might be a good thing for the two of us. Without both of us resentful about watching our siblings, I hoped it would give us a chance to get to know one another as something close to equals.

  “Eh, I doubt I’ll go that far.” Jayden offered me a friendly smile as I pulled Chase against my side. Our parents weren’t sure what to think about Jayden because Chase was different when his boyfriend was around, but I knew that was because he was genuinely happy. Jay was a good guy, and I was hoping to get to know him better. “All I’m saying is, I really don’t need to know what my big brother sounds like when he’s behind closed doors with his boyfriend.”

  “And I’m sure you’d rather not have me eavesdropping when you bring girls home,” he teased. I cringed. Jayden quirked an eyebrow, as if silently asking if I was ready to tell my brother there wouldn’t be any girls.

  I swallowed hard. It wasn’t like my brother would judge me if I came out to him. If anything, it might help him realize he wasn’t alone. My concern wasn’t for today; being in Annandale felt like finally being able to breathe. I didn’t have to hide myself from our parents. They’d struggled when Chase came out and, right or wrong, I worried how they’d react when they realized another son wasn’t going to be the first to marry a nice girl and start a family. The silence grew awkward and Jayden gave me a thumbs-up.

  I could do this.

  “Yeah, I wouldn’t want you getting jealous if I can make a guy moan better than Jayden can,” I quipped. Chase spat out the water he’d just taken a sip of. His eyes were nearly bugging out of his head when he finally looked up at me. I threw my hands in the air. “Surprise! You’re not the only gay Kepler kid.”

  “Why didn’t you say something sooner?” Chase threw his arms around my shoulders and pulled me into a tight hug.

  “Maybe, but it wasn’t time. I didn’t want to come out until I wasn’t living at home,” I admitted.

  “You could have, you know,” Chase reassured me. “Mom and Dad won’t be mad at you when you tell them. But the longer you wait, the more it’s going to seem like you were hiding something from them.”

  “That’s not what I was doing.” If anything, I wanted some room to spread my wings so I could explore my feelings. Chase might have been the only one in our family who was surprised when he came out. I saw how painful that was for him when he tried dating girls in high school, and I’d decided it was better for me to wait until I left home to dip my toes in the dating waters. Brooksville didn’t exactly have a thriving gay community.

  I just wanted to be sure before I said anything. I wasn’t like Chase. Our family looked at me and thought I was a dumb jock wannabe. We couldn’t afford sports, so I spent my afternoons in the weight room at school. It was something I could do that was just for me.

  “Hey, I wasn’t trying to upset you,” Chase said as the elevator doors opened. We stepped to the side to let the parents and students out. Chase held the door open as Jayden and I loaded our first stack of totes and luggage. He didn’t say anything else until the doors closed and we began our jerky lift to the fifth floor. “You could have told me, at least.”

  “I know, but I wasn’t ready.”

  “You can’t fault him for that, Chase,” Jayden interjected. “The last thing he needs right now is you making him feel like shit because he didn’t come out on your timeline.”

  “I know, Daddy.” Chase buried his face against Jayden’s chest. It was still weird as fuck to hear him refer to his boyfriend as Daddy, but I was getting used to it. And it was sort of sweet, too. I was jealous of the connection they shared. It wasn’t something I wanted for myself, but I hoped to eventually have someone look at me the way Chase looked at Jayden. I wanted to earn that level of trust. Chase turned his face to look at me. “I’m sorry if I made you feel bad. That wasn’t what I was trying to do.”

  I stepped closer, resting a hand on Chase’s shoulder. “I know you weren’t. And I wasn’t trying to keep secrets.”

  “Do you have a boyfriend back home?” he asked warily.

  I shook my head, biting back a laugh. “Nah, you know as well as I do that shit would never fly back there. But maybe that’ll change. Who knows, maybe I’ll follow in your footsteps and fall for my roommate.”

  “It definitely makes things more convenient,” Jayden murmured, pressing a kiss to Chase’s hair. Fuck, they were so sweet I could almost feel cavities forming. “But I still wouldn’t recommend it. When it works, it’s awesome, but there’s nothing worse that crushing on someone who has no clue you’re interested.”

  There was a story there, but I wasn’t sure what it was. All I knew was half the people in our suite were in relationships with their roommates. Two couples, and then the rest of us. That made me nervous because, as Jayden said, it was only a good thing if your relationship was stable.

  “I was just playing,” I scoffed as the elevator doors opened. I hefted a stack of totes and stalked off toward the room without checking to see if the guys were behind me. I’d been stuck with the lovebirds for the drive up here from Brooksville, and I needed to get away from them before jealousy made it impossible for me to breathe. “Besides, I’m pretty sure you and your buddies have already busted the law of averages for the number of gay guys randomly meeting and sharing living quarters.”

  Chase and Jayden shared a pointed look. I was not going to ask what that was all about. Even if they were in the gayest suite in the building, hooking up with someone that close to home wasn’t what I needed. Yes, I wanted to explore my sexuality and sow some oats but, more than that, I wanted to bust my ass so I would never wind up back in Brooksville working a dead-end job. That was what my family expected of me, because I hadn’t been the most studious kid in high school, and I was determined to prove them wrong.

  Chase unlocked the suite and held the door for Jayden and me to pass. Jayden didn’t bother checking out the suite before putting his stack of totes in the first bedroom on the left. That decision made, I wandered deeper into the suite to see how far I could get from them.

  While we hadn’t grown up in poverty, it was a bit sad that my first adventure into adulthood felt like luxury accommodations. Then again, that might have been partly due to the lack of marker on the walls and toys strewn over every surface. I paused in the middle of the common area and closed my eyes to savor the silence. It wouldn’t last with eight of us sharing space, but for a minute, it was—

  “You must be the fresh meat.”

  I rolled my eyes before glaring at the dude bro before me. If he didn’t radiate toxic levels of asshole vibes, he was someone I could see myself getting to know. Like me, he had a nicely sculpted physi
que, meaning it was likely he knew his way around the student fitness center. But then I’d have to deal with his holier-than-thou bullshit.

  “Yeah, I’m Colin.” The load in my arms kept me from having to shake hands with the guy. I ran through what Chase and Jayden had told me about the returning roommates. I couldn't imagine this guy as a prankster, so he wasn’t Matt. There wasn’t anything cooking in the kitchen, so he wasn’t Brandon. And there was nothing humble about him. That meant… “You must be Zach.”

  “What the fuck’s that s’posed to mean?” he sneered, still standing in the middle of the walkway so I couldn’t get past him to find my room. So much for a smooth transition.

  “Nothing at all, man,” I assured him as I hefted the totes that were getting heavier by the second. “Look, it’s going to be a long year if we’re at each other's throats and I’d rather avoid that. How about I get settled a bit and we’ll try this again?”

  “Yeah, whatever,” Zach scoffed. I half expected him to give me shit about talking back to him because he was the upperclassmen and I was a lowly freshman who technically shouldn’t have been allowed in this building. I squared my shoulders and didn’t break eye contact. He squirmed but took a step to the side.

  “Oh, come on, don’t tell me you’re out here being a dick.” Zach’s expression dimmed as if he’d been scolded. Another roommate—Daniel, if I wasn’t mistaken—grabbed Zach by the shoulder and pulled him out of my way. “Sorry about him. He’s always a little testy when we first get back to campus. It’ll get better in about a week.”

  “Screw you, Wilkie,” Zach snapped, jerking out of Daniel’s grasp. “I’m not a fucking child and I don’t need you making excuses for me.”

  Daniel leveled him with a glare and Zach backed down.

  “Fuck, sorry, Colin,” Zach apologized. “It’s been a long ass day and I’m not always housebroken.”

  Part of me wanted to make him sweat, but I didn’t feel like that was the right tactic with him. There was something guarded about him, and I wasn’t sure any of his buddies had ever really looked at him to see past the mask he wore.

  “No sweat.” I snuck past him and dumped my load of totes into the only room at this end of the suite that hadn’t been claimed, then stepped back into the hall. A little gratitude could go a long way in this situation. After all, I couldn’t really blame any of the older guys for being annoyed about the change in living arrangements. Like Chase, they hadn’t asked for us to have crazy over-protective parents who somehow pulled strings to keep me out of the dorms. They hadn’t even considered how much more trouble I could get into with more freedom. “In case I forget to say it later, thanks for being cool about this. I’m hoping once things settle a bit, we might be friends.”

  God, that sounded lame.

  “It’s all good,” Daniel reassured me. When Zach didn’t say anything, Daniel elbowed him in the side. Zach grunted, which I took as his agreement. Oh well, I wasn’t going to push my luck with him. Not yet, anyway. “Your brother’s good shit.”

  “He’s a’ight,” I agreed.

  Daniel smiled. “I have a feeling you are too, otherwise he wouldn’t have asked about you moving in.” A bit of a faulty assumption, but I didn’t correct him. Chase and I were polar opposites in just about every way. “So, hey, we’re ordering in pizza tonight. You in?”

  I hedged because I had limited funds until I found a part-time job. That was the first thing on my agenda for the next week.

  It damn near knocked me on my ass when Zach was the one who noticed my discomfort first. “There’s a killer join that’s cheap as hell. The pizza won’t win any awards, but it’s tasty and fills the hole.”

  He gave me a slow, down-up glance and, if I didn’t know better, I’d swear he blushed. He’d just totally been checking me out. Now, I just needed to remember I didn’t exactly like him.

  “And if pizza’s not your thing, they have salads and some other healthy shit,” he amended. That was laughable, but I stifled my amusement. Fuck, I couldn’t wait until I didn’t feel like I was walking on eggshells with him.

  Screw it. Daniel had extended an olive branch, and I was going to accept it. Mom and Dad had given each of us an allowance for the start of the semester; I could afford to splurge tonight, since Chase already told me it was a rarity for these guys. “Nah, pizza’s cool. Just let me know how much I owe you.”

  I hitched a thumb over my shoulder. “I’m going to try and get unpacked. Jayden’s taking my boxes and shit over to his mom’s place and I don’t want him waiting on me.”

  “Cool. If you need help, just give us a shout,” Daniel offered. He pulled Zach into their room, but it didn’t seem like Zach resisted much.

  * * *

  It wasn’t until Jayden and Chase took off for the night that Daniel knocked on my door to let me know they were ordering. It felt weird being here without the only people I knew, but I needed to get used to that. Chase had invited me to Jayden’s mom’s place, but I knew he wouldn’t be able to let go if I was there. And Chase needed to get back into his routine.

  “You want me to grab plates?” I asked as I loaded a few soda cans onto the shelf Daniel had indicated was mine in the fridge.

  “We use paper on pizza night,” Zach offered, still sounding annoyed that I was intruding on their time.

  I’d asked Chase if the two of them were a couple, and he’d nearly choked on his juice. Or maybe that was because I’d barged in without knocking and found him curled up in a bean bag chair with his Pika and a sippy cup, but whatever. That was far from the weirdest thing I’d ever seen.

  “Oh, cool.” I pulled some paper plates off the counter and a small stack of napkins. “You guys want anything to drink since I’m already in here?”

  “I’ll get it,” Zach grumbled.

  “Seriously, quit being a dick,” Daniel scolded him. “He’s trying to be nice. It’s not like he’s asking if you want him to suck your cock.”

  Zach spluttered, his face turning an adorable shade of red. “Well, no, but at least that’s something I can’t give myself.”

  He was cute when he was too flustered to put on the grumpy front. I couldn’t help but tease him just a little. “I mean, I figured it was too soon to offer sexual favors, but if it would help you chill, I’m down.”

  Daniel cackled, nearly dropping the pizza he’d just collected from the lobby. Zach caught it, setting it on the table. He flipped off his roommate and disappeared into their room.

  “Shit, I probably shouldn’t have said that, huh?” Now things were going to be really uncomfortable.

  “It’s fine.” Daniel shrugged. He inhaled deeply as he opened the first pizza box and tossed a couple pieces on each plate. “I don’t want to seem like a gossip, but people being openly gay isn’t something he’s used to. I promise, he’s not a homophobe, but maybe it’d be best to lay low until he gets to know you a little better.”

  “Lay low as in…?” I let the question trail off.

  Daniel jerked his head toward the couch, furthest from our bedrooms. He sat at one end and I took the chair across from him. Pizza night had been a stupid idea. I’d let my guard down. For the first time, I hadn’t worried about holding back a snarky retort and it had bitten me in the ass. “Zach spends a lot of time trying to prove how masculine he is. Right now, he’s probably feeling a bit insecure. He did this when your brother and Jayden got together, and again when Matt and Brandon admitted they were a couple. He’s convinced himself people will think he’s gay if too many of his roommates are.”

  “That’s such a load of shit.” I stuffed half a slice of pizza into my mouth to keep from rambling about how much that reeked of internalized homophobia. I’d seen the way his eyes lit up momentarily when I’d teased about blow jobs. That was a man who needed something he wasn’t brave enough to ask for. And so far, he’d kept everybody else off his trail with his shitty attitude.

  “I’m not saying I disagree.” Our conversation was cut short when Zac
h sulked back into the room. Daniel pointed to the table. “Dished you up. I was going to bring it in if you didn’t get out of your snit.”

  “It wasn’t a snit,” Zach argued.

  “Okay, whatever you say.” Daniel chuckled and rolled his eyes. “Get your head out of your ass and sit with us.”

  “Yeah, okay.” Zach eyed me warily as he sat at the opposite end of the couch from Daniel. They asked questions about Chase and me, Daniel told me about his family, and Zach wasn’t at all subtle about changing the subject before we could talk about him. “Matt and Brandon are going to be here tomorrow. I’m assuming someone else is coming to fill the empty bed in your room?”

  I shrugged, hiding my satisfaction that he’d directly addressed me instead of trying to talk to me through Daniel. “I guess. No clue who it would be then. Maybe I’ll get lucky and have a room to myself.”

  “Yeah, fat chance of that,” Zach scoffed. “They get to charge the big bucks on the suites so there’s never an open bed. Hopefully whoever they send us is cool.”

  He stared at me and I wondered if that was a subtle jab that he wasn’t happy about me being here. Well, he’d just have to suck it the fuck up and get used to having me around. I wasn’t going anywhere, so he was stuck with me until he graduated next spring.

  3

  Zach

  I hated it when my dad was right. Him saying he didn’t want me to get a job only lit a fire under my ass to work as many hours as I could. It only took me a couple of days to get hired on at the pizza joint as a delivery driver, and by the time I cashed out at the end of the night, came home, showered off the stink and grease, and did my homework, I passed the fuck out. Sometimes, I was even lucky enough to make it to my bed. Most of the time, Daniel shook me awake at some point in the night and guided me toward our room.