Three Stupid Weddings

by Ann Gallagher

  Three Stupid Weddings

  By

  Ann Gallagher

  Copyright Information

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

  Three Stupid Weddings

  First edition

  Copyright © 2018 Ann Gallagher

  Cover Art by Lori Witt

  Editor: Jules Robin

  All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher, and where permitted by law. Reviewers may quote brief passages in a review. To request permission and all other inquiries, contact Ann Gallagher at gallagherwitt@gmail.com

  ISBN: 978-1-64230-924-9

  Table of Contents

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Epilogue

  About the Author

  About Three Stupid Weddings

  On the heels of a painful and long overdue breakup, what Victor Nelson needs is time to lick his wounds. What he doesn’t need is everyone in his family trying to play matchmaker so he can find someone new… which is exactly what they’ll do at the three stupid weddings he has to attend this summer.

  Fortunately, it’s Dominic Lowe to the rescue. Dom is more than willing to come along to all the weddings as his best friend’s “boyfriend”… even if he’d much rather be there as Vic’s real boyfriend.

  Convincing people they’re a couple is easy. The charade is miserable for Dom, though, after years of being madly in love with Vic. But maybe those three weddings are a rehearsal for the relationship he knows they could have for real.

  This asexual M/M romance is approximately 38,000 words long.

  Trigger warnings: eating disorder, discussions of verbal/emotional abuse

  Chapter 1

  Vic

  “Somebody looks stressed.” Haley grimaced sympathetically as she watched me drop into the last empty seat at the four-person booth. “What’s wrong?”

  “Just got off the phone with my mom.” I groaned. “If one of you wants to stick some poison in my food, go for it.”

  Dominic, Casey, and Haley exchanged puzzled glances.

  Casey cocked their head. “Since when do you and your mom not get along?”

  “No, no, we get along. And we didn’t fight or—” I sighed, and realized how pathetic I sounded. Clearing my throat, I sat up a bit. “The thing is, weddings are a big deal in my family. Like, a big deal.”

  Casey and Haley both frowned and went for their drinks. They both had some pretty strong opinions about the obsession with weddings, and I didn’t totally disagree with them. Personally, I loved the sentiment and the romance but, like my friends, wrinkled my nose at the thought of pouring thousands of dollars into a party.

  Dom poked at some ice cubes with his straw. “So, I’m assuming your mom was calling to tell you someone’s getting married?”

  “Yep. And not just someone—three someones.” I didn’t even care if I sounded pathetic now. “I’m invited to three stupid weddings this summer.”

  Casey made a gagging noise. Haley snickered, though she looked almost apologetic.

  Dom shook his head and chuckled. “Man. That sucks.”

  Sobering a bit, Haley studied me. “So, why go? I mean, you’re invited, but you don’t have to go, do you?”

  “I wish. And…” I sat back and exhaled. “Honestly, I don’t even mind going. Especially to my sister’s. It’s just…” I chewed my lip for a moment. “I’m just so not ready to deal with three weddings in a row full of people trying to hook me up with their sons, nephews, cousins, dry cleaners, and gardeners-in-law. My mom has already mentioned, like, six guys who are coming, and hey, it’s a wedding and romance is in the air!”

  My friends all rolled their eyes.

  I thumbed the edge of the menu I hadn’t even opened yet. “I’m just… I’m so not ready for that, you know? Max hasn’t even been gone two months, and I’m…” My shoulders sagged, and I had to fight back the sudden lump in my throat.

  Dom put a gentle hand in the middle of my back. “I don’t think anyone expects you to be ready for that.”

  “No one except my entire family. And I mean, I feel like a dick complaining about it. I could do a lot worse than have a family who waves the rainbow flag a little too enthusiastically sometimes.”

  “Yeah, probably.” Casey shrugged. “But it’s not like you come in here and act like nobody’s problems could ever top that, so…” They made a dismissive gesture. “And anyway, I don’t blame you for wanting some time to get over Max. That was rough on you.”

  More to myself than anyone else, I murmured, “It was.”

  Dom’s hand moved up to the back of my neck and gave a gentle squeeze. I closed my eyes and sighed, fighting the urge to just lean into him and let him hug me until I didn’t care about Max or dumb weddings anymore. Dom was good at things like that. Always had been.

  “Maybe just talk to your mom?” Haley suggested. “You don’t think she’d understand that you need some time after Max?”

  I laughed dryly and met her gaze across the table. “My mom is convinced the best way to get over a guy is to start looking for another one.”

  Haley and Casey exchanged puzzled looks. They were both aromantic, and while they understood relationships on an intellectual level, neither could wrap their heads around the utter obsession with needing to have a partner. Being with someone made sense, but the way people flailed and panicked over being single as if they were missing a vital organ was alien to them. As much as I loved being in love with someone, I was starting to think my friends were onto something.

  “Any way you can bail on the weddings?” Casey asked. “Or at least not go to all of them?”

  “Not really. And I mean I actually do like weddings, and I want to see my sister and my cousins getting married.” I rubbed the bridge of my nose. “I’m just not looking forward to the let me introduce you to him-go-round.”

  “Maybe you should take a date,” Haley said. “Tell your mom they’re your partner, and just enjoy the weddings without all the pressure.”

  I blinked, lowering my hand. “That’s… Damn, that’s a good idea.”

  “You’ll have to deal with all this again after you”—she made air quotes—“break up, but at least it’ll buy you some time to finish getting over Max.”

  “Good point.”

  Dom’s fingertips twitched almost imperceptibly on my back, and he cleared his throat. “If you want, I can go with you.”

  I turned to him, eyes wide. “Really?”

  “Why not?” He slid his hand up to my shoulder and gave it a reassuring squeeze. “Your mom’s always telling you we’d make a cute couple, right?”

  Oh God, wasn’t she ever?

  “True. But you really wouldn’t mind?”

  “Not at all.” He grinned. “I like wedding cake.”

  I snorted. “Who doesn’t like wedding cake?”

  “See? Exactly!” He grinned broadly. “So I get free wedding cake—”

  “Not to mention free booze,” Ha
ley supplied.

  Dom nodded. “I get free wedding cake and free booze, and you avoid all the matchmakers. It’s perfect.”

  “Huh. Well damn. Yeah.” I smiled and leaned against him, and as he wrapped his arm around me, I sighed with a lot less frustration than I had a minute ago. “Why am I not surprised that this group solved my problem?”

  “Pfft.” Casey picked up their drink. “If it weren’t for us, none of your problems would ever be solved.”

  “Hey!” I tried to kick them under the table but missed, and they laughed.

  “You know they’re right,” Dom said, chuckling. I aimed a playful glare at him, but his smile shut me down. “Come on, it’s not like it’s just you. We all solve each other’s crap.”

  “Exactly,” Haley deadpanned. “Otherwise we’d be charging your ass.”

  “Okay, that’s fair.” I laughed, sitting up so I wasn’t leaning on Dom anymore. I would have loved to stay like that all through dinner, but two dudes cuddling in public didn’t always fly. That, and it was kind of tough to eat like that, and now that I had a plan for surviving those weddings, my appetite was slowly coming back to life. As much as it ever did these days, anyway; I’d take what I could get in that department.

  Feeling a hell of a lot more optimistic about things, I opened my menu and started looking for something to eat.

  Chapter 2

  Dom

  After dinner, Vic and I waited with Casey and Haley until their Lyft came. We both lived fairly close by, and once our friends were safely in the car, we started walking.

  Hands in his pockets, Vic glanced at me. “So, in all seriousness, you really don’t mind coming with me to these weddings?”

  “Not at all.” I paused. “I mean, assuming they’re not on the other side of the world and I can get the time off work.”

  He laughed softly, shaking his head. “Nah, just a few hours each way. The first is in Portland, and we’ll have to cross the mountains for the other two. Far enough away that everyone understands if I’m only in town for a day or two on either end of the wedding even though I have to be there for all the pre-wedding bullshit.”

  “Easy enough. When are they?”

  “Two in June, one in July.”

  “So like two or three months out. That’s doable. I have some vacation time left, so I can work it out. Just send me the dates and I’ll talk to the boss.”

  Vic smiled, a hint of shyness in his beautiful brown eyes. “Thanks. This means a lot.”

  “Don’t mention it.” I slid my hands into my pockets. “So who’s getting married, anyway?”

  Vic released a long breath. “My sister, of course. Then there’s my cousin Kelley who I don’t think you’ve met. You’ll love her. And my cousin Wendy, who you might not love, but her mom is basically my second mom, so I have to go.”

  “I might not love her? What does that mean?”

  “It means…” He pursed his lips. “Remember that coworker of mine who hung out with us for a while last summer? Chelsea?”

  “Chelsea.” I thought for a second. “Was she the one with the can-I-speak-to-your-manager haircut?”

  Vic nodded.

  I grimaced. “Uh, yeah. I remember her. Is your cousin like her?”

  “My cousin is like the Jedi master who taught her.”

  My jaw fell open. “Seriously?”

  “Uh-huh. And it’s not just a haircut for her. It’s a lifestyle. Especially when she’s stressed. Which totally won’t be a problem at, you know, her wedding.” He turned to me, brow pinched. “But there will be wedding cake. Focus on the wedding cake.”

  “Oh, I’m focused on the wedding cake. Don’t worry.”

  “Good. Because the cake will be awesome. The bride… not so much.”

  “I’m almost afraid to ask what you think of who they’re marrying.”

  Vic made a quiet but emphatic grunt that said he definitely had an opinion on at least one of the spouses-to-be. Curiosity got the best of me, so I said, “What are they like?”

  “Oh lord.” Vic took a deep breath. “I haven’t met Wendy’s dude, but I assume he has the patience of a saint because…” He rolled his hand as if to say do the math. “Anyway, Cousin Kelley’s girlfriend—well, fiancée—is funny as hell and really sweet. The guy my sister’s marrying, though? He’s…” Vic stared at the ground with unfocused eyes while we walked, and it took almost half a block before he spoke again. “He’s not a bad guy. He treats her well, and he loves her son like he’s his kid. I can’t point to something and say he’s a loser or an asshole. I just…”

  “You’re her big brother.” I patted his shoulder. “No one’s ever going to be good enough for your baby sister.”

  “Okay, fair. And yeah I’ve totally been overprotective since that asshat she had a baby with.”

  “At least she’s not marrying him.”

  “Oh. Lord.” He put a hand to his chest and shook his head. “I’m pretty sure the entire family would murder him, dismember him, and each take a piece of him to bury in some remote spot in the wilderness.”

  I chuckled. “And then never speak of it again?”

  “Please. It would be discussed at every holiday dinner until the end of time.”

  I threw my head back and laughed. “See, this is why I’m totally cool coming to weddings in your family. If nothing else, it’s bound to be entertaining.”

  Vic laughed halfheartedly and turned to me, brow pinched. “That and the cake, right?” There was a hint of uncertainty in his expression, and apparently I’d known him long enough to read him like a book, because I easily saw the please tell me that’s not the only reason in his eyes.

  I stopped, so he did too, and we faced each other on the deserted sidewalk. Holding his gaze, I put a hand on his shoulder. “You need someone to be there for you, so I’m going to be there for you.” I chanced a grin and shrugged. “The cake and entertainment are just, well, the icing on the cake.”

  That got a real laugh out of him, followed by a genuine smile. “You have no idea how much I appreciate this. I know there are way worse things a guy can deal with than a family being overly enthusiastic about hooking him up with a guy, but—”

  “But you’ve been through hell the last couple of months.” I squeezed his arm. “There’s nothing wrong with protecting yourself, and it doesn’t matter if someone else has been through worse.”

  Vic managed a little smile. “Thank you.” He stepped closer and hugged me tight. “You’re the protective big brother I never had.”

  I smiled, and hopefully he didn’t feel me wince. “You know I’m always here for you.”

  “I know. And I really, really appreciate it.” He pulled back, and when our eyes met, his smile melted my heart. Had Max ever stopped to appreciate how beautiful this man was? Probably not. He’d always been too busy finding reasons to criticize.

  Vic cleared his throat and broke eye contact for a second. “Anyway.” He gestured at the corner up ahead. “This is my turn. I’ll, um, see you later.” His smile was tired, but genuine. “I’ll email you all the details about the weddings.”

  I nodded. “Perfect. I’ll let you know if there’s any snags with work.”

  “Sounds good.”

  We exchanged smiles, and at the corner, he went left while I went right. I went a few steps, then turned to watch until he’d disappeared around another corner. With a sigh, I continued down the sidewalk.

  As I walked, I couldn’t stop thinking about Vic and about the deal we’d made tonight. I was going to pretend to be his boyfriend so his family would get off his back and he could catch his breath after his breakup. I’d assured him that was totally an easy thing to do, and a no-brainer to step up and volunteer. And it was a no-brainer.

  Easy, though? I wasn’t so sure.

  He’d taken it really hard when Max left, and he’d just started pulling himself out of that funk. By the time the weddings rolled around, he might be on solid enough ground to think about dating, or at the v
ery least, handle his mom’s well-intentioned attempts to find him a boyfriend.

  Then again, maybe not. He’d been with Max for a couple of years, and the split had come out of nowhere. I couldn’t think of anything that had broken my heart more than Vic sobbing on my shoulder the night he’d come home to Max packing a bag. Even now, I could tell when he was thinking about Max—he wore the pain on his sleeve. Having people pressure him to get into another relationship was just salt in that wound, and it broke my heart just thinking about him spending all three of those weddings playing Dodge the Matchmaker. So yeah, no shit I was going to step in. What friend wouldn’t?

  Thing was, I’d known Vic for almost nine years, ever since I’d joined the asexual/aromantic support group where he’d also introduced me to Casey and Haley. They’d taken me in as their fourth Musketeer, and even though Casey and I didn’t go to the group very often anymore—too much conflict with our work schedules—the four of us were still tight.

  And none of them knew I was secretly in love with Vic.

  Or that despite how much it broke my heart to see Vic hurting because of Max, I was relieved that their relationship was finally over. Not so I could have him for myself, though—I hated Max. Had from day one. I’d tried to tell myself it was jealousy, but no, it wasn’t. I hated how he’d always wanted Vic to tone down his usually flamboyant personality. How much he pressured Vic to think about “better career options” when we all knew damn well he meant he was embarrassed to be dating a hairdresser. A damn successful one, too, which must have dented the hell out of Max’s delicate middle-management ego. Nothing Vic ever did—hell, nothing he ever was—could ever be good enough for Max. Sometimes I thought the asshole just enjoyed having someone to criticize. I couldn’t imagine what else kept him around.

  So when he’d left, I’d been devastated to see Vic hurting so bad, but I’d been secretly relieved too. Maybe once he’d recovered from all of this, the light Max had dimmed would come back to life in Vic’s eyes.