Banana Cream Pie Murder

by Joanne Fluke

  Norman considered that for a moment. “Actually . . . that’s a very good idea. I could run them both simultaneously and be done with the vacuuming in half the time. Thanks for thinking of that, Ross. I’ll order a second one tomorrow.”

  “How about you, Mike?” Ross turned to him. “Do you have a RoboVac?”

  “Not me. I hired Marjorie Hanks to clean my place and she brings her own vacuum.”

  “How about you, Lonnie?” Ross asked.

  Lonnie shook his head. “I don’t need to clean my place. I still live with my parents.” He turned to look at Michelle. “I’m thinking about getting my own apartment, though.”

  Hannah glanced at her sister. Michelle was beginning to blush. Since her youngest sister wasn’t the type to show her embarrassment, Hannah decided she’d better have a heart-to-heart with Michelle later to find out exactly what was going on.

  Of course everyone loved the Brownie Candy and all of them complimented Michelle for making such a delicious dessert. Hannah put on a second pot of coffee and when that was almost empty, Norman turned to Ross. “I’ll help you with the vacuum settings if you want me to.”

  “Me, too,” Mike offered.

  “Sounds good to me.” Ross pushed back from the table and stood up.

  “You’re only having two pieces of Brownie Candy?” Hannah asked Ross.

  “Yes, for now. Don’t take them off the table, Cookie. Just as soon as we take care of the RoboVac settings, I’ll have another with a second cup of coffee.” Ross stopped at Michelle’s chair and gave her a little hug. “They’re really good, Michelle. You and your sister are incredible bakers!”

  Hannah smiled at Ross, even though his back was to her and she knew he couldn’t see it. Ross really did like Michelle and he said that he didn’t mind at all if she stayed with them. Since Hannah loved having her youngest sister stay with her, the fact that Ross approved of the arrangement made her very happy.

  “I’d better cut some more of that Brownie Candy,” Michele said.

  “And I’ll help you,” Lonnie replied, “I’ll bet you that Ross eats more than one more piece and I figure Mike is good for two.”

  “How about you?” Michelle asked him.

  “I’ll have another one for sure. Ross is right. You and Hannah are incredible bakers.”

  “Just sit and relax, Hannah,” Lonnie told her as Hannah made a move to get up from the table. “Michelle and I have got this covered. Besides, those three,” he gestured toward the three men huddled over the RoboVac, “might need a referee if they start arguing about how to set the vacuum.”

  “Do you think it’s a case of Too many cooks spoil the broth?” Hannah asked him, repeating one of her great-grandmother Elsa’s favorite sayings.

  “It could be,” Michelle said quickly. “You know how men are with tools and Mike just picked up the wrench that came in the tool pouch.”

  “The box says, SOME ASSEMBLY REQUIRED,” Lonnie pointed out, “and Norman just dumped out some vacuum parts on the rug.”

  “Then I’m right,” Hannah admitted. “Ross just picked up a wheel and now Norman is paging through the instruction book. I’d better keep an eye on them to make sure we don’t have a replay of Dad, Uncle Ed, and the ten-speed bicycle.”

  “What did they do?” Lonnie asked Michelle.

  “I don’t know. I was probably too young to remember. Ask Hannah.”

  Hannah chuckled a bit at the memory. “Andrea wanted a ten-speed bike for her birthday and Mother and Dad decided to get it for her. Dad owned the hardware store at the time, so he ordered the bike through one of his vendors. Unfortunately, he didn’t order it assembled.”

  “Uh-oh!” Lonnie shook his head. “I did that once and tried to put it together myself.”

  “What happened?” Michelle asked him.

  “I ended up paying the guy at the bike shop fifty bucks to take it apart and put it together the right way for me. And I could have ordered it assembled for only twenty-five dollars more.”

  Michelle laughed. “So you paid an extra twenty-five because you tried to save money?”

  “That’s right.” Lonnie turned to Hannah. “Did the same thing happen with your dad and your uncle, Hannah?”

  “In a way, but it was much worse. Michelle and Andrea were upstairs sleeping and Mother and I went into the den to watch television while the men worked on the bike.”

  “And they couldn’t assemble it?” Michelle guessed.

  “Oh, they could. And they did. It took them hours and several pots of coffee, but when they called Mother and me in to see it, it looked beautiful. It was pink and it had something in the paint that made it glitter. It was exactly what Andrea had wished for.”

  Michelle looked puzzled. “Then it worked out all right?”

  “Not exactly. It was perfect until Andrea tried to ride it. That was when she discovered that she couldn’t change gears while the bike was moving.”

  “But . . . that’s when you want to change gears,” Lonnie pointed out.

  “I know. Dad returned the bike to the vendor and asked for a replacement.”

  “Assembled?” Michelle asked, beginning to grin.

  “Oh, yes. This time it was assembled. And it wasn’t until years later that Mother showed me the parts that she took out of the garbage the next morning, the parts that Dad and Uncle Ed had decided weren’t necessary to install.”

  “But didn’t Mother ever say anything to Dad about it?” Michelle asked.

  “No, never. She only showed the parts to me after Dad died. She said she didn’t want to embarrass him.”

  “She must have loved him a lot,” Lonnie said.

  Michelle nodded. “You’re right. It had to be love. We all know Mother, and it must have just about killed her to keep quiet about it for all those years.”

  After Lonnie and Michelle had gone into the kitchen, Hannah turned to watch the three men again. The wheels were on the RoboVac, but they were still working on something else that connected to the bottom of the machine.

  As she watched them work, Hannah began to smile. It was good to see Norman, Mike, and Ross get along so well together. Everything was working out perfectly between her three favorite men.

  SLOW COOKER CHICKEN STROGANOFF AND NOODLES

  (This recipe is for a 5-quart slow cooker.)

  1 medium onion, diced (I used a Maui sweet onion)

  3 pounds boneless, skinless chicken half-breasts (9 or 10 pieces)

  1 can (8 ounces) mushroom stems and pieces, drained

  ½ teaspoon garlic salt

  ½ teaspoon onion salt

  ½ teaspoon regular salt

  ¼ teaspoon ground black pepper (it’s always better if you grind it yourself)

  1 can (10 and ½ ounces) condensed cream of mushroom soup (undiluted—I used Campbell’s)

  1 can (10 and ½ ounces) condensed cream of celery soup (undiluted—I used Campbell’s)

  1 packet (1 ounce) dry Ranch Dressing mix (I used Hidden Valley Original Dressing Mix)

  8-ounce package cream cheese, cut into cubes (not whipped cream cheese—I used Philadelphia brick cream cheese in the silver package)

  1 cup (8 ounces) sour cream (to add right before serving)

  Hot cooked and buttered noodles of your choice (cook right before serving)

  Spray the inside of the slow cooker with Pam or another nonstick cooking spray. (This will prevent sticking and make it easier to wash the crockpot later.)

  Place the diced onion in the bottom of the crockpot.

  Arrange the chicken on top of the diced onion.

  Plug in the crock pot, turn it on LOW heat and let it cook for 5 to 6 hours.

  When the chicken is fork tender, turn off the crockpot, put on potholders, and lift the crock out of the crockpot. Set it on a cold burner on the stovetop.

  Take the top off the crockpot and let the chicken cool for a few minutes.

  Remove the chicken breasts, one by one, and place them on a platter.

 
Set a large strainer in a bowl and, again using potholders, pour the liquid and onions into the strainer.

  Reserve the liquid for later use and return the onions caught by the strainer to the crock.

  Cut the chicken on the platter into bite-size pieces.

  Open the can of mushroom stems and pieces, drain off the liquid and add it to the onions in the crockpot.

  Return the pieces of chicken to the crockpot.

  Sprinkle the chicken with the garlic salt, onion salt, regular salt, and black pepper. (You’ll taste this later to see if you have to further adjust the seasonings.)

  Open the can of condensed cream of mushroom soup. Use a rubber spatula to remove the soup from the can and add it to the crockpot.

  Open the can of condensed cream of celery soup. Again, use the spatula to add it to the crockpot.

  Sprinkle the packet of dry Ranch Dressing mix over the top.

  Add the cubes of cream cheese.

  Hannah’s 1st Note: No, I didn’t forget the sour cream, but if you add it now, it will lose its texture. You will add the sour cream right before you serve the stroganoff.

  Using your rubber spatula, stir everything up.

  Return the top to the crock, replace the crock in the base, and turn it on LOW heat.

  Let this yummy mixture cook for 30 minutes or longer. At the end of that time, taste the sauce and adjust the seasonings. If you think the sauce is too thick to pour over noodles, stir in enough of the cooking broth you saved to make it the right consistency.

  Hannah’s 2nd Note: Don’t worry if your company is late. This stroganoff will keep on low for 2 hours or longer.

  When your company comes, fill a large pot with water, saving room for that cooking broth you reserved earlier. It will add flavor to the noodles. If you want even more flavor, add a couple of chicken bouillon cubes to the water.

  Follow the directions on the noodle package to cook your noodles.

  When your noodles are cooked, drain them and toss them with butter. Then transfer them to a serving bowl.

  Add the cup of sour cream to the crockpot, stir it in, and you’re ready to serve.

  Hannah’s 3rd Note: If you don’t feel like dishing up plates for everyone, let your guests serve themselves from the noodle bowl and the crockpot.

  Yield: 8 to 10 servings unless you plan to invite Ross, Norman, Mike, and Lonnie. Then you’d better double the recipe and prepare two crockpots.

  CHEESY BEER MUFFINS

  Preheat oven to 350 degrees F., rack in the middle position.

  4 cups flour-based muffin mix (I used Bisquick)

  12-ounce bottle or can of pale lager beer (I used Budweiser)

  1 cup finely shredded sharp cheddar cheese (I used Tillamook sharp cheddar)

  Hannah’s 1st Note: I’ve used finely-shredded Kraft Mexican cheese or Kraft finely-shredded Italian cheese in these muffins when I didn’t have the cheddar cheese. It works just fine.

  Measure the muffin mix by filling the cup measure and leveling it off with a knife. DO NOT pack it down in the cup when you measure it.

  Place the muffin mix in a large mixing bowl or the bowl of an electric mixer.

  Hannah’s 2nd Note: I usually use my stand mixer to make these muffins, but you can also mix them up by hand.

  Pour in the bottle or can of beer, wait a bit for it to stop foaming, and then mix it in on LOW speed. Make sure that the muffin mix and the beer are combined, but don’t worry if your mixture has a few lumps.

  Hannah’s 3rd Note: If the beer you’re using is cold, let it warm up a bit before you pour it into the muffin mix. If you add it cold, the baking time will be longer by several minutes.

  Take the mixing bowl out of the mixer and stir in the half-cup of cheese by hand.

  Spray two 12-cup muffin or cupcake pans with Pam or another nonstick cooking spray. Alternatively, you can line the muffin cups with double cupcake papers.

  Fill the muffin cups three-quarters full, distributing the muffin batter as evenly as you can.

  Hannah’s 4th Note: Sometimes, when I bake these muffins, I add a 4-ounce can of well-drained Ortega diced green chilies to the batter before I stir in the cheese. If Mike is coming to your house for dinner, you can also add a couple squirts of Slap Ya Mama hot sauce.

  Hannah’s 5th Note: If I have any shredded cheese left over, I sometimes sprinkle a little on top of the muffins before I bake them. Don’t sprinkle on too much cheese. Just sprinkle a bit to add visual interest.

  Bake your Cheesy Beer Muffins at 350 degrees F. for 15 to 18 minutes or until the tops are golden brown and a long toothpick or thin skewer inserted in the center of a muffin comes out clean with no muffin batter clinging to it. (Mine took exactly 16 minutes.)

  Remove your muffins from the oven and set the muffin pans on a cold stovetop burner or a wire rack. If you sprayed your muffin cups, let them cool in the pan for 1 to 2 minutes and then tip them out of the muffin cups and place them on a wire rack to cool for another 5 minutes. If you used double cupcake papers to line the muffin cups, let them cool in the muffin pan for 1 to 2 minutes. Then pull them out of the pan by the edges of the paper liners, place them on a wire rack, and let them cool for an additional 5 minutes.

  You can serve these muffins warm or cold. (I think they’re better warm, but Mike also likes them cold and spread with cream cheese for breakfast the next morning.) If you serve them warm, place them in a napkin-lined basket, cover them with a second napkin, and serve them with plenty of softened, salted butter.

  Lisa’s Note: Herb loves these muffins with homemade chili or beef stew. He also enjoys eating them with tomato soup. Sometimes I brush the top with butter and garlic salt while they’re warm.

  Yield: 2 dozen beery, cheesy muffins that your guests will love.

  Chapter Nine

  Hannah said good night to their guests and joined Michelle in the kitchen. She glanced up at the clock and realized that it was only eight-thirty. “Do you think Tricia is still at work?”

  “Tricia?” Michelle asked, looking puzzled. “I think so. I talked to her about a week ago. She said she was on nights and her shift didn’t end until they closed.”

  “And she’s still working out at the Lake Eden Inn?”

  Michelle nodded. “She really likes it. She says Sally’s a dream to work for and Dick’s always really good about giving her breaks when she needs them.”

  “She’s a cocktail waitress isn’t she?”

  “Yes. She used to work as a waitress in the restaurant, but she says the tips for cocktail waitresses are even better. Why do you want to know Tricia’s schedule?”

  “Because I need to talk to her and I think it’ll go better if you’re there. I’m not even sure if she remembers me.”

  “Of course she does. She mentioned your Butterscotch Crunch Cookies the last time I talked to her.”

  “Great! I’ve got some in the freezer. I’ll get them out and then let’s go and talk to her.”

  Michelle grabbed Hannah’s hand as she headed for the freezer. “Wait!”

  “What?”

  “How about Ross?”

  Hannah felt an immediate stab of guilt. She’d forgotten all about the fact that Ross was in their bedroom, changing into comfortable, television-watching clothes. “I’ll go ask him if he wants to go for a drink at the Lake Eden Inn with us.”

  Ross was sitting on the bed, putting on his slippers, when Hannah opened the door to the master bedroom. “Hi, honey,” she said, coming in and closing the door.

  “Hello, Cookie. I took a quick shower and I’m almost ready to vegetate in one of those reclining couch chairs in front of our incredible home theater.”

  “I can see that,” Hannah said with a smile, noticing that he was wearing one of his monogrammed sweatsuits.

  Ross frowned slightly. “That’s what I told you I was going to do. It’s okay with you, isn’t it?”

  “Of course it’s okay!” Hannah said quickly. “I’d change too, but . . .” she stopped spea
king, not exactly sure how to go on.

  “But what, honey?”

  “But I have a chance to talk to a friend of Michelle’s who might know something about Tori Bascomb’s murder.”

  “Right now?”

  Hannah noticed that the frown on her husband’s face had grown a bit deeper. “Yes, but that’s okay. It can wait until tomorrow. I just thought you might want to go out to the Lake Eden Inn for a drink. She’s a cocktail waitress out there and she doesn’t get off shift until they close.”

  “Oh, Cookie! I’d go with you in a flash, but I’ve got an early call tomorrow. And to tell the truth, I can barely keep my eyes open. It’s a little hard to get back into the work routine after that wonderful week we had together on the cruise.”

  “I know,” Hannah told him. “I feel the same way. I got really tired at work today, but then I got my second wind. Don’t worry about it, honey. I can always talk to her sometime tomorrow.”