The Welcome Home Diner: A Novel

by Peggy Lampman

  His eyes circle my face, with softness, slowness. And there is something else in them, something eager and humble when he begins to speak.

  “I’ve got it, Addie. At last. It’s like a complicated riddle, and I’ve finally cracked the code.” He shakes his head in wonder, brushing his hair from his eyes. “You’ve been trying to show me all along, and it’s the simplest thing in the world.” He bumps his fist on the table. “The purest distillation of life is love. The only reason worth living is for the people we love, and for those who love us back. In the end, it’s the only thing that matters.”

  He touches my wrist as I finger the beads. “Even death doesn’t stop love from being alive.” He leans toward me, pressing his torso into the table. “Love’s not tangible—it’s not something you can touch. At the same time, it’s so big I was afraid of it. Stumbling around in the dark, I was drifting, searching, not knowing who I was or what I wanted. But when you offered me your hand, I took my own, as well. Love just is. That’s the miracle. And loving you has told me who I am. Why I’m here.”

  I pause, tracing the outline of the crucifix. “It’s ironic, but it’s been the opposite with me. Being away from you taught me that the best lessons are often learned alone, at ground zero.” I release the rosary and take his hands. “This newfound wisdom can’t be contained on a spreadsheet or noted on a to-do list, but it does include you.”

  He smiles his rascal smile. Please, God, don’t let him upset the moment with a cliché.

  “Check the inside pocket of your jacket.”

  “What?”

  He hands me my coat, which is lying next to me on a chair.

  Wiggling my fingers into the pocket, I feel a small box, velvety and round.

  I’m reminded of a Latin saying, Dum spiro, spero. While I breathe, I hope. I pull out the box, regard it a few seconds, and then open the lid. A diamond sparkles on a cushion of black velvet.

  “Adelaide Jaworski. Will you marry me?”

  The restaurant sounds dim as my heart jumps hurdles. I take a deep breath to compose myself—not so fast. I hesitate a fraction of a second, before meeting his gaze.

  “Let’s make this a promise ring. Not an engagement. I want you to be sure.”

  “I am sure. I’ve never been so sure of anything in my life.”

  “But, David. I wanted it too much. I was so hungry to hear you say those words that the constant craving was consuming me.”

  “Why not? Why not hunger for love and its beautiful symbols—marriage, children? There’s too much ugliness in the world, Addie. But to be truly loved and to return that love are life’s greatest gifts. The one aspect that’s pure.” The muscles in his jaw tighten, his eyes resting on the rosary. “The one aspect that’s holy.”

  His fingers wrap around my wrist, and he pulls my hand forward. “Feel my heart.” I stretch my palm over his chest, feeling his flesh and the imprint of the top button on his shirt. “Until you came into my life, no one had ever touched me here.”

  My hand trembles, feeling the strength of his hand pressing into mine and the beat of his heart. But I don’t need to be rescued by that rhythm, or to feel his power when I have the same capacity of strength in myself. At the same time, my shadow twin completes me. The power of love lies is in its fluidity, its ebb and flow. I remove my hand from his chest.

  “I’ve given so much thought as to what I would say to you at this moment,” he continues. “And here’s what I’ve come up with.”

  There is a new look in his eyes, something I don’t recognize. “You are like a shooting star—glittering, thrilling—breaking through a pitch-black night. A star I pray is not too high for me to reach. My feeble attempt at poetry,” he mumbles, removing the ring from the velvet. “I’m no Dylan,” he continues, “but these are my words, my words, Addie, spoken from my heart. And what could be a more fitting metaphor for a star than this?” He holds the ring at an angle so the diamond catches the light.

  He catches my eyes. “I’ll ask you again. Adelaide Jaworski. Will you marry me?”

  I stare at the platinum band, which rests between his thumb and forefinger. I know he’s waiting for my answer. My gaze returns to his face, and concern flashes in his eyes. I can’t find my voice. I take a sip of water and clear my throat. So this is it.

  “Yes, David.” The two words crack beneath my breath. “I will be your wife.”

  His jaw drops, and he emits a sharp breath, as if massively relieved I didn’t turn him down. He lifts my wrist and slides the ring onto my finger. I stretch my hand in front of me, admiring the beauty of the stone, which is cut into the shape of a teardrop.

  “Whenever I look at this ring, I’ll remember how you compared me to a shooting star. It was a beautiful thing to say.” With my fingertips, I stroke his hand.

  My gaze returns to his face, and I feel dizzy tumbling into his eyes. “In the ancient world, stars were thought to be the souls of people we love who’ve died.” I cock my head. “Can this also be a wishing star?”

  “It’s anything you want it to be.”

  I think of Mom, trapped inside her fears. “I wish all of the people I love can also find their path.” My nostrils sting as I think how happy our news will make her. “Their courage.” Biting my lips, I try to contain my tears but feel their warmth sliding down my cheeks.

  He cups my chin into the palm of his hand. “I’ve always admired this trait of yours. How you encourage people to be their highest selves.”

  In the midst of our lovefest, a couple seated at a nearby table tip their glasses toward us, smiling. With my dinner napkin, I wipe away my tears. Heat rises to my cheeks, and I admonish myself for my embarrassment at being caught in this sacred moment. David and I raise our glasses to the strangers, and then we all take a sip, a silent toast in our testimony to love. Spread it on thick, spread it on sweet, so it looks, smells, and tastes like fresh cherry jam.

  “When you taste food and wine,” I say, bringing the glass to my nose and inhaling, “what makes it delicious is the roundness of flavors. And how the flavors complement one another—the bitter and sour balanced with the sweet.” I place the glass to the side of my plate, and my eyes travel across his face. “I want our marriage to have the same balance, as we live our lives in that sweet spot in the middle.”

  He takes a sip, his expression thoughtful, and his jaw moves, as if he’s chewing the wine. Swallowing, he nods his head in agreement, placing his glass on the table.

  “You’ve taught me so many things,” he says, brushing the sides of his mouth with his napkin. “About love, life.” He winks at me. “Also, the proper way of buttering bread.” He pinches off a bit of bread, butters it, and pops it into his mouth.

  “Oh yes. The lessons taught me by my mother.” I lace my voice with irony. “How could you ever live your life without my finesse, my tutelage? Seriously, David—chaos is the world in which we operate.” I lean forward and brush away his hair, which has fallen into his eyes. “Chaos is like a frigid wave crashing over your head. But you keep walking forward, into the icy water. And then your body gets used to the cold, the pieces fit together, and you begin to swim deep into the lake.” I raise my glass to the sky. “Here’s to chaos. Bring it on.”

  The waiter, as if hearing my words, appears with our food.

  David laughs. “So you’ll grow to appreciate my balled-up laundry on the floor, dirty dishes in the sink? My stacks of papers on the dining room table?”

  I frown.

  “I’m kidding you. My point is that Adelaide Jaworski, the woman I love, the woman who will be my wife, finds order in chaos. You’re one of those rare breeds not afraid of facing it down. That strength is another one of the bazillion reasons why I’m so madly in love with you.”

  A pinkish sheen creeps into his eyes, and at this moment, he is the one who cries. I hand him my napkin, which I’ve just used as a handkerchief. After a minute, he takes a shaky breath, wipes his eyes, and his words ring with earnestness.

 
“Addie. Baby girl. I am so lucky to have found you.” He blinks several times, as if not quite believing this moment. “And after losing you, you let me find you again. You’re not afraid of anything, are you?”

  I inhale sharply. “I’m afraid of everything, David. But I can’t let my fears stop me. Even when it breaks my heart.”

  I grab his hands, and his damp palms press into mine. “We’re so lucky to be living in a time and place where we—me and you—can make change happen.”

  Flying on the wings of a phoenix, born again from its ashes.

  Walking home in the dew-dusted night, our words drop as petals, drifting down, leaving a trail behind us. Lights from above make prisms through the moisture and are mirrored in the damp pavement, twinkling beneath our feet.

  I look up into the deep, incalculable beauty. I say it in a whisper: “Streetlights. New streetlights.”

  He releases my hand and steps off the curb, onto the boulevard. A golden glow beams down on him as a spotlight in the blackened sky. His arms stretch out toward the heavens, and his face is radiant in a halo of light.

  “Addie. Look. Detroit is shining!”

  His voice echoes through the night. Ringing like a bell. Ringing like a hymn. Ringing like a benediction.

  The Recipes

  Quiche’s Buttermilk Pancakes with Apple-Maple Syrup and Walnuts

  Yield: 12 pancakes, with enough Apple-Maple Syrup* to accommodate

  Time: 45 minutes

  *Make the syrup before making the pancakes.

  Ingredients for Pancakes

  ¾ cup all-purpose flour

  ¾ cup whole-grain pastry flour or whole-wheat flour

  2 tablespoons light-brown sugar

  1½ teaspoons baking powder

  1 teaspoon baking soda

  ½ teaspoon kosher salt

  2 large eggs

  1¾ cups buttermilk

  1½ tablespoons melted unsalted butter

  Canola oil, as needed

  Apple-Maple Syrup with Walnuts (recipe follows)

  Directions for Pancakes

  Preheat the oven to 200 degrees.

  In a large bowl, whisk together both flours, brown sugar, baking powder, baking soda, and kosher salt. In a medium-size bowl, beat together the eggs and buttermilk.

  Stir the wet ingredients into the dry ingredients, then stir in the melted butter.

  Lightly coat a large nonstick griddle or skillet with oil and heat over medium-low heat (325 degrees). Using a ⅓-cup measure, ladle the batter onto the hot skillet. Cook the pancakes 3 to 5 minutes, or until bubbles form on top and the bottom is golden brown. Flip the pancakes and continue cooking until the pancakes are golden brown on both sides.

  Keep the pancakes warm in the oven as you finish cooking the remaining ones. Reheat the Apple-Maple Syrup and serve over the hot pancakes.

  Ingredients for Apple-Maple Syrup with Walnuts

  ½ cup shelled walnuts or pecans

  2 tablespoons unsalted butter

  3 to 4 large apples (1½ pounds), cored and cut into ½-inch-thick slices*

  ¾ cup pure maple syrup

  ½ teaspoon ground cinnamon (freshly ground preferred)

  *Honeycrisp, Winesap, or Braeburn apples are best in this recipe. For uniformity, use an apple corer, then cut the apples lengthwise into thin slices.

  Directions for Apple-Maple Syrup

  In a large, dry sauté pan over medium-low heat, toast the nuts until fragrant and lightly toasted, about 3 to 5 minutes. Remove from the pan and reserve.

  Melt the butter in the same pan. Sauté the apple slices until just tender, about 8 minutes. Stir in the maple syrup, cinnamon, and toasted nuts. Reserve to serve with pancakes.

  Braydon’s Mess of Greens with Turnips and Potlikker

  Yield: Enough for a family reunion (16 cups)

  Active Time: 30 minutes

  Cook Time: 2 to 2½ hours

  Ingredients

  1½ pounds smoked pork hock or shank

  Kosher salt

  2½ to 3 pounds turnip greens, bottom tough stem ends removed*

  2½ to 3 pounds turnips (3 large), peeled and cut into 1-inch chunks

  3 slices raw bacon, cut into 1-inch pieces

  3 to 4 cups diced sweet onions

  1 tablespoon light-brown sugar

  Pepper vinegar, if available, or cider vinegar combined with hot sauce, if desired

  *Mustard or collard greens may be substituted for part or all of the turnip greens.

  Directions

  Place the hock or shank in a large pot. Cover with 14 cups (3½ quarts) water. Lightly season the water with the kosher salt, then bring to a boil. Reduce the heat to a simmer and cover the pot, then cook 1 hour. (If the pork is not completely submerged in the liquid, you will need to turn it over after 30 minutes of cooking time.)

  Chop the greens into 1-inch pieces and wash thoroughly. Stir the greens into the pot and bring to a boil. Reduce the heat to a simmer and cook, uncovered, until the greens are just tender, 30 to 45 minutes, depending on the type and age of greens used. Add the turnips to the pot and stir them into the greens and pork. Simmer until the turnips are tender, an additional 20 to 30 minutes. (When the greens and turnips are tender, do not discard the cooking liquid; this is the potlikker.)

  While the greens are simmering, fry the bacon until crisp. Remove the bacon from the pan and reserve, draining on paper towels. Sauté the onions over medium-high heat in the bacon fat. Stir in the brown sugar and cook the onions, stirring occasionally, until golden, soft, and fragrant, about 20 minutes. Finely chop the reserved bacon and combine with the cooked onions.

  With tongs and a slotted spoon, remove the greens, turnips, and pork from the potlikker. With a sharp knife, remove the pork from the hock or shank. Discard the fat or return it to the potlikker, if reducing (see step 6). Chop the pork.

  Combine the chopped pork, cooked greens, turnips, and bacon-and-onion mixture. Season to taste with kosher salt, if needed, and pepper vinegar (or cider vinegar combined with hot sauce), to taste, if desired.

  If desired, reduce the potlikker over a low boil to as strong a potion as desired. Greens and potlikker are delicious served with hoecake or corn bread.

  Sam’s Lamb Burger Sliders with Tzatziki and Beetroot Relish

  Yield: 16 sliders

  Time: 35 minutes, if Tzatziki and relish have been made in advance

  Special Nonfood Items Needed

  A grill

  Note: The Beetroot Relish and Tzatziki may be made up to 2 days in advance.

  Ingredients for Lamb Burger Sliders

  2 pounds ground lamb

  1 pound ground beef (80/20 grind)

  2 teaspoons finely chopped garlic

  ½ to 1 cup chopped fresh mint

  1 heaping teaspoon ground cardamom (optional)

  1 teaspoon kosher salt

  2 teaspoons freshly ground black pepper

  16 2-inch slider rolls

  Beetroot Relish (recipe follows)

  Tzatziki (recipe follows)

  Directions for Lamb Burger Sliders

  Gently knead the lamb, beef, garlic, mint, cardamom (if using), kosher salt, and freshly ground pepper together. Cook a small bit of the batch, taste, and adjust the seasonings to your palate.

  Divide the mixture and form into 16 patties. Oil the grill grates, and heat the gas or charcoal grill to medium-high heat. Grill the burgers 2 to 3 minutes per side for medium rare. Cook 1 to 2 minutes per side longer for medium to well-done, or until the desired level of doneness is reached. Grill the buns until lightly toasted, if desired.

  Spread one side of the buns with the Beetroot Relish and the other side with Tzatziki. Place the burgers in between the top and bottom buns and serve.

  Ingredients for Beetroot Relish

  3 to 4 medium-size red beets

  ½ medium-size red onion

  ¼ cup extra-virgin olive oil

  2 to 3 tablespoons red wine vinegar

  2 tablespoons lig
ht brown sugar

  Kosher salt

  Freshly ground black pepper

  Directions for Beetroot Relish

  Note: Sauté the leftover washed beet greens in olive oil with a bit of garlic for a savory side dish. Or use them as a topping for crostini or bruschetta and sprinkle with crumbled goat cheese.

  Wearing plastic gloves, trim the greens and both ends from the beets, peel, and grate, using a box grater. You should have more than 2 packed cups of grated beets. Remove the outer skin from the onion and grate.

  In a medium bowl, whisk together the oil, vinegar, and brown sugar. Season with the kosher salt and freshly ground pepper. Stir the grated beets and onion into the vinaigrette.

  Ingredients for Tzatziki

  Note: Leftover Tzatziki makes a wonderful vegetable dip as well as an accompaniment to lamb, swordfish, poultry, and grilled vegetables such as eggplant and zucchini.

  1 large cucumber, peeled, cut lengthwise, and seeded, then cut into small (1/4-inch) dice (1½ cups)

  2 tablespoons fresh chopped herbs (dill or mint, or a combination of both)

  1 scant teaspoon minced garlic

  1 cup plain (2% or full fat) Greek-style yogurt

  Kosher salt

  Freshly ground black pepper

  Directions for Tzatziki

  Place the diced cucumber on paper towels or in a fine-mesh sieve. Lightly sprinkle with the kosher salt. Let drain 15 to 30 minutes, pressing into the towels or sieve with a spoon to release excess moisture.