Sign of the Times

by Susan Buchanan

  “I get off in half an hour,” the barman said meaningfully.

  Desperately Jennifer said, “That’s nice.”

  “Would you like to meet up later?”

  “I-I-I…” she stammered again.

  “I’m sure she’d love to, but we have plans later, don’t we darling?” a very welcome voice said, from behind her.

  “Yes,” she said, unable to think of anything else to say, relieved beyond belief to have got rid of the barman and delighted that Ben, for she was sure it was Ben, had come to her rescue. She twirled to face her rescuer who said,

  “I came to help you with the drinks.”

  “Thanks.”

  “Can’t have you being set upon by the wolves,” at which Jennifer smiled faintly.

  When Jennifer had placed the last drink down in front of Henry, she discovered on returning to her seat, that it was no longer Lee on her right hand side, but Ben. The proximity of this man to her was intoxicating. Jeremy, who sat on her other side, started up a conversation with Ben about mountain climbing. She sat back and just listened to them, acknowledging some sort of involvement every so often. Meanwhile, she was trying to make sense of her turbulent thoughts. She felt a connection with this guy. There was a lot of positive energy flowing between them. She wished she’d studied her chakra books more, so she could understand it better.

  The men started talking about abseiling, when suddenly Ben turned to her and asked her if she’d ever abseiled.

  “Well yes, but not for years.”

  “Did you enjoy it?”

  “Yes. It was brilliant, but I was absolutely fearless when I was seven.”

  They all laughed at that, then Lee excused himself to go to the toilet.

  “Bring back more drinks,” Jez shouted after him.

  “So, would you abseil again?” Ben asked

  “I-I don’t know,” stumbled Jennifer. “I don’t exactly get the opportunity.”

  “You make your own opportunities in life. If you want to go abseiling again, let me know. It’s my specialty. You’d be perfectly safe with me.”

  And Jennifer really thought she would be. Even though he was sexy as hell and causing her to experience all sorts of emotions she hadn’t felt for years, she really did feel that he would be a dependable, reliable sort of guy. But, what was she thinking of? He wasn’t interested in her. She fancied the pants off him, but there was no sign it was reciprocal. And then she thought, well, why the hell not? For once she decided she was going to be spontaneous. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

  “I’d really like that. When’s the best time to do it?”

  Ben smiled and looked genuinely pleased that she wanted to pursue it further.

  “Well, basically anytime when it’s not frosty or icy, if you’re a beginner, although once you get more adventurous, perhaps we can get you ice climbing,” he said, his eyes twinkling. Jennifer wasn’t sure about ice climbing, but he was certainly making her heart rate climb.

  “So, when am I taking you?” Ben broke into her reverie.

  Now, she wanted to say, but then she thought of her mother, so said, “I don’t have much free time,” at which he looked crestfallen and said, “That’s too bad.”

  Again, she rallied and said, “It’s complicated” and briefly explained about her mum.

  “That’s got to be hard on you.”

  “Sometimes,” she admitted, “but I couldn’t live with myself if she had to go into care.”

  Ben looked at her in open admiration.

  “Well, if you ever have a free window, let me know,” and taking a supermarket receipt out of his wallet, he scrawled his mobile number on the back.

  Jeremy’s reappearance pronounced the arrival of another round of drinks. The intimacy was gone and all seven of them settled into a big debate about travel and where was the most worthwhile place on Earth. Jeremy said the missionaries in Africa must have the worst job, but with the greatest rewards. The others all shot him down and said that they didn’t want to know about any noble causes. They just wanted his dream destination. This debate raged until they had to leave, due to the campsite curfew. Periodically Jennifer glanced at Ben and occasionally she thought she caught him looking at her too.

  They all trudged along, singing and linking arms. Jez had talked Ben into coming back to the campsite with them, rather than getting a cab back to his B&B in Ballachulish. Lee was a dab hand at the old campfire and Henry had promised them all sausage sandwiches. They sat chatting for an hour or so. Jennifer was beginning to feel quite tired, despite her exhilaration. Excusing herself, she made for the Portakabin toilet at the other end of the campsite. About a third of the way across, she cursed herself for not borrowing Lee’s Maglite. She couldn’t see a damned thing.

  Hands washed, Jennifer came out and banged straight into Ben. Quickly regaining her composure after her initial fright at a shadow looming out of the dark at her, Jennifer teased,

  “Sorry, but do you usually loiter around ladies’ toilets?”

  “No, but I saw you struggling on the way over and figured I’d bring you a torch.”

  Jennifer was touched.

  “Did you really come all the way over here to bring me a torch?”

  “Well, not exactly. The torch was an excuse.”

  “What do you mean?” she asked, confused.

  And in answer to her question, Ben bent down and kissed her very softly on the lips.

  Gzing is what Jennifer felt. She tingled all over. He drew away from her and looked in her eyes. Seeing there what he wanted, he kissed her again, this time not so softly, parting her lips, making her catch the sound in her throat. She almost gasped with pleasure. His tongue tangled with hers, his arms moved up and down her back, as she snaked her arms around his neck. Eventually, he drew away from her again. “I’ve wanted to do that all night. I couldn’t wait to see if you took up my offer of abseiling.”

  “So I see,” she chuckled.

  “I wasn’t too forward was I?”

  “I’m glad you were.”

  “So, where do we go from here?” and in response Jennifer drew him down to her again, devouring him hungrily, feeling him harden against her, igniting her own desire further. It had been so long since she’d been touched like this. Ben drew his fingers over her flat tummy and she almost climaxed there and then.

  “We’d better go back or I’m not going to be able to control myself.”

  “Me neither,” she breathed.

  “When can I see you again?”

  “We’ll sort something out,” Jennifer said, determined that she would. Tonight had reminded her what life was all about.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Maggie was wondering what was keeping Jennifer. She hadn’t noticed Ben slip away, as she’d been engrossed in her conversation with Susan. When Jennifer returned with Ben, Maggie looked at her quizzically. Jennifer feigned innocence, but Maggie wasn’t so sure. When she’d seen them talking animatedly in the pub earlier, she’d had a similar thought. She hadn’t seen Jennifer so lit up in a long time and wondered if there were possibilities there. Come to think of it, she did look flushed and her hair a little dishevelled. Had they been up to anything? Good for them if they had.

  It wasn’t long before they called it a night. Ben had made a point of sitting beside Jennifer, but talked to everyone else too, so as not to arouse suspicion. Maggie was one of the first to lope off to bed, “See you in the morning, Jennifer.”

  “Yes, night.” Jennifer didn’t realise Maggie was trying to engineer for them to be left alone. When it was just the two of them, Ben whispered in her ear, “I want to kiss you again.”

  She whispered back, “Do it then.”

  So he did, but broke away quickly, “come with me.”

  Not in the slightest bit apprehensive she followed him to a more secluded part of the campsite. As soon as they were far enough away, they fell into each other’s arms. They kissed until their lips were red and sore, but still they wanted
more. They touched each other all over, hesitating at the intimate parts. Ben caressed her nipples through her bra, but didn’t go inside it, which made his touch all the more exquisite. She touched his upper thighs, almost but not quite reaching his erection, which drove him wild.

  “I wish I could make love to you right now, but I won’t.”

  “I know,” said Jennifer, kissing him softly on the lips. They rearranged their clothing and lay cuddled together, stroking each other for a while, then agreed they’d better get back.

  “Hey, you haven’t given me your number,” so Jennifer gave it to him.

  The next day Ben had to get up earlyish to drive back to Fort William. Work was especially busy at weekends. All the way home to Ayr, Jennifer thought of Ben and his body against hers and hoped and prayed he would phone. She was just going to bed early, as she wasn’t used to partying and being up as long as she’d been the previous night, when the phone rang. It was twenty to eleven. Usually it meant bad news if someone called after nine. That was the etiquette, wasn’t it?

  “Hello?”

  “Jennifer. It’s Ben. So you got back OK then?”

  “Yes,” she was delighted he’d called so soon. They talked for over an hour and eventually Ben said “I better go. I’ve work in the morning. I’ll give you a call when I’m in Glasgow and hopefully we can meet up, discuss that abseiling trip in more detail.”

  “That would be great,” she could hardly keep the excitement out of her voice. “Bye then.”

  Jennifer was unable to will herself to sleep. She wasn’t sure she wanted to sleep anyway. She’d rather think about Ben, remember every inch of him and she meant every inch. She threw back the duvet and got out of bed. Padding through to the kitchen, she switched on the kettle. Settling down in her armchair, with a cup of tea, she perused the remaining competitions she hadn’t yet entered – a Ford Ka, £3000 cash, a year’s free shopping at Sainsbury’s, a trip on the Orient Express, a ski weekend in Austria, champagne for life. She busied herself filling out the postcards and completed a further twenty applications before deciding she probably would manage to sleep now.

  *

  “So, what’s going on with you and Ben?” Maggie didn’t even introduce herself when she phoned. “You looked pretty close. Is romance in the air?” she teased.

  “We-ll…”

  “I knew it! You bitch! He’s bloody gorgeous. It’s about time you starting seeing somebody.”

  “Well, I’m not actually seeing him,” protested Jennifer, secretly wishing she was.

  “Did he kiss you?”

  “ Well, yes.”

  “Jennifer Abercrombie, you dirty stopout!” chided Maggie.

  “Well it was only a little kiss,” she lied, fingers crossed behind her back.

  “Has he phoned?”

  “Last night.”

  “See. Oh! Romance really is blossoming. That’s great, Jennifer.”

  “Thanks, but I don’t know if anything will come of it. He is nice though.”

  Maggie could hear the grin in her friend’s voice and couldn’t resist adding “don’t forget gorgeous.”

  “Yes, that too. So, what’s the catch. I wonder?”

  “There isn’t always a catch.”

  “No, just usually.”

  “So when are you seeing him?”

  “I don’t know,” Jennifer admitted, “possibly the next time he’s down, but I’m not sure what to do about Mum.”

  “You’ll find a way. We’ll find a way, even if I have to come over and sit with your mum for a while. I’m sure mine would be happy to help out. It seems they had a good chat. Apparently they have a lot in common.”

  Jennifer wondered how true this could be, given that her mother was bedridden and Maggie’s mum was very active. Perhaps they’d been discussing her mum’s life before the onset of her condition. If she’d only known that they’d both been discussing daughters and how they worried about them.

  “So, I’ll see you next week then,” Maggie chipped in before ringing off.

  Jennifer heard the door rattle when the postman put the letters through. Her mum was watching TV in her room. Bending down to pick up the letters, she saw she had a postcard, from Tuscany.

  Hi Jennifer. You would love it here. If things were different, I would invite you over right now. Date for your diary, 9th November is my book launch. Maria’s helping me organize it. Please say you can make it. I have so much to tell you. Will email soon. Hols. X

  She missed Holly. They had worked together years ago and had ended up living in the same street for a bit, but then Holly moved in with Tom and as Holly was always travelling for work, they rarely saw each other. Of course, she had devoured her friend’s first book. The razzamatazz of the glamorous book launch had appealed to her too. It had been the highlight of her year. Smiling, she pinned the postcard on the cork board in the kitchen and turned her attention to the remaining letters. An electricity bill, either that or a letter informing them prices were going up again. It seemed to be all the time at the moment. A couple of pieces of junk mail, asking if they wanted their upholstery cleaned, or a conservatory put in. Then, a flyer from a supermarket, with the week’s special offers and finally one she couldn’t identify right off. Puzzled, she opened it, read it, her hand covering her mouth, as she leant against the kitchen wall for support.

  Chapter Twenty

  Ben - ARIES

  Assertive, pioneering, competitive, courageous and impulsive. Natural athlete, drawn to physical activity. Like danger, risk and adventure. Good at motivating others.

  Ben Donnelly rubbed his eyes, trying to dislodge the sleep from them. He’d slept badly. Unfortunately he had to work, so he got up and moved off in the direction of the ensuite to shower. As he smoothed shampoo through his short, dark hair he kicked himself for drinking again last night. This had to stop. It had been four months.

  Four months earlier

  “Honey, I’m home,” Ben called, as he kicked off his trainers. Kathryn was very proud of their home. She’d chosen everything in it – being a lady of leisure and also fortunately a woman of means, as Ben’s paltry income from the hiking goods store wouldn’t have covered a quarter of the lifestyle she was accustomed to. Their house was more a stately home, yet there were only the two of them, Kathryn loathe to give up her figure, to have children.

  Theirs had been a whirlwind romance. Ben, a volunteer with the Lochaber Mountain Rescue, had rescued her from the top of Ben Nevis, when thick fog had impaired visibility so badly they had no chance of getting down unassisted. Kathryn had been very poised. But after their wedding, Ben learned she was nowhere near so gracious most of the time. Yet he loved her, despite her faults. She was funny, charming; when she wanted to be, intelligent and could be good fun.

  Kathryn, however, was also a very self-assured, confident woman, who knew what she wanted. And she wanted Ben. Ben had been so busy the last few years, working and volunteering for the Mountain Rescue, that he’d never given much thought to a relationship. Initially he had no idea she was wealthy and when he found out, he was horrified. He was out of his depth here. He didn’t do the tux and cigars deal.

  Her parents, Edgar and Amelia, were very aloof and didn’t think he was good enough for their daughter. Perhaps they were right. He certainly couldn’t support her. Edgar had made it painfully obvious to him, not long after the engagement, that it was futile to try to pay for his daughter’s lifestyle and that she had her own money. It was no secret he disapproved of Ben’s lack of career structure. In addition to being on the Mountain Rescue’s rota and working part-time in McGregor’s Camping Supplies, he covered a few shifts in a pub. Edgar seemed to have forgotten that Ben had rescued his only daughter. In the beginning Ben thought Edgar was being open and friendly, trying to set his mind at ease about providing for his daughter. Until one day Edgar hissed at him, “I’ll provide the house, but I expect you to make a living for yourself. I will not have my daughter supporting you.”

&nbs
p; Ben had been shocked. He’d never been branded a sponger by anyone and he was furious. But he kept his cool and apart from the palatial residence his father-in-law provided them with, didn’t take a penny from him, working hard to cover their bills. He certainly covered all of his, although he couldn’t quite stretch to covering her Nicole Farhi and Gucci bills every month, or her Louis Vuitton luggage, for which she had a penchant.

  “Kathryn. Where are you? I’ve got a surprise!” Ben’s six foot frame scampered up the stairs and along the plush carpeted corridor towards their bedroom.

  He opened the door and saw his wife standing at one side of their bed, her hands patting something down. A smile creased his face, until he reached her and saw her stony, impassive one.

  “You’re early,” she said.

  “I wanted to surprise you.”

  “You did.”

  Ben looked from his wife’s face to the bed where she had been folding negligees into a suitcase.

  “Are you going somewhere? Have I forgotten?”

  “Yes and no. I’m leaving you, Ben. This isn’t working out.”

  “What?” Ben was astounded. “Why?”

  “I’ve outgrown you. You have no ambition. I can’t be married to that.”

  Ben’s chin dropped towards his chest. He couldn’t believe he was hearing this.

  “Please tell me you’re joking. I thought we had a good marriage.”

  “Well that just about sums you up. You can’t see what’s right in front of you. You’d rather gad about on mountains than spend time with me. You never socialise at all, unless it’s one of those dreadful fund-raisers for your damned mountain rescue. I need some excitement and quite frankly you’re not giving me any.”

  “But you know I hate the social circuit. I don’t do hunting or black tie dinners. We had an understanding.”

  “No. You chose not to accompany me to functions because you couldn’t be bothered. I wanted you there.”

  “Well, why didn’t you tell me? If it means that much to you, then I’ll go.”

  “It’s not only that.

  “What else?