Life After Taylah

by Bella Jewel

  “Goodnight, Avery.”

  Her lip trembles as I pull back.

  I don’t look back as I climb through the window and into the darkness.

  ~*~*~*~

  AVERY

  “Very good,” I say to my eight-year-old student, Jenny.

  She spins and swoops low. Her back is a little stiff, but she’s a good dancer for her age. She’s my first full time student, and it’s been quite challenging.

  “That’s it, just loosen your back, Jen,” I encourage.

  She tries again, but her body is still too stiff.

  “Here, let me show you.”

  She stops dancing and turns to me. I do the move quickly, spinning around and closing my eyes, letting it take over me the way it always has. When I’m done, Jenny smiles, her eyes bright. She’s looking at me like I’m her future—like I’m hope.

  “Try again,” I say, standing back.

  She does the move again, much smoother this time. I nod and encourage her through it until she’s got it almost perfect.

  “Great, Jenny,” I say, clapping my hands. “You did really well. We’re done for the day. I’ll see you tomorrow at the same time.”

  “Thanks Avery.” She smiles, rushing to her bag and throwing it over her shoulder.

  When she’s gone, I make my way to the lockers and I change into my work uniform. I’ve managed to get extra hours at the library, as well as pick up a bar attendant job in the city. It’s enough combined for me to pay my new rent and also keep up the teaching. It’s not easy, and there are days I wonder how long I can push through it, but I’m still surviving.

  My father hasn’t spoken to me since the day after I left Jacob. I rang him the next morning and he abused me so heavily I ended up hanging up on him. Basically, he told me he was disappointed and that he wouldn’t be supporting me again until I got back on track and corrected my mistakes. He will be holding his breath for a long time, because there won’t be any corrections.

  I’m finally happy.

  I finish up here and then I make my way over to the bar. I’m working tonight, and luckily for me, it’s just around the corner from the dance studio. When I arrive, it’s already bustling. It’s a Saturday night and I usually make great tips. I see Quinn, a girl I’ve befriended over the past week, standing at the bar, flipping glasses into the dishwasher. She notices me and smiles, waving.

  “Hey, Avery.”

  I wave back, quickly rushing out back to put my stuff down. I tie my hair up and lean down to do up my laces before heading out to help her.

  “How’s things?” she asks as I begin drying some glasses.

  “Not too bad, what about you?”

  She shrugs. “So so. I have so much study to do it’s snowing me under.”

  I frown. “I know the feeling.”

  A man comes up to the bar and smiles at both of us. He’s about forty and reasonably good looking with black wavy hair and striking blue eyes. “Can I get a whiskey, neat.”

  I nod and prepare his drink for him, and then I slide it across the bar. He hands me some cash and I quickly get his change. He grins at me as I place it in his hands, and I feel his fingers curl around mine as he takes it.

  “Do you have a name, sweetheart?”

  Ugh.

  “It’s Bianca,” I lie.

  “Well, Bianca,” he purrs, “thank you.”

  I give him a false smile as he walks away.

  “Gross,” Quinn mutters. “Some men are so wrong.”

  I laugh. “I know!”

  We work side by side for another few hours as the bar picks up. At about nine p.m., I take my break and head outside for some fresh air. I find a seat and sit down with a glass of water and a granola bar. I see a group of men walking towards me, and I smile when I see it’s Kelly, Keanu, Liam and . . . oh man . . . Nate. Kelly grins at me and when they stop, he leans down and presses a kiss to my head.

  “How’s it goin’, Av?”

  I shrug, trying to avoid Nate’s gaze. “Busy. You guys here for a drink?”

  “You know it,” Liam says, walking inside.

  Keanu is gathering the attention of women to our left, and he’s grinning at them like he wants to eat them alive. God, he’s such a womanizer. Nate is also garnering attention, only he’s not paying any back. Instead, his eyes are on me.

  “Avery,” he murmurs.

  “Hey Nate,” I say, trying to sound as casual as I can.

  I stand up, needing to get back in and needing to get away from his penetrating gaze. I rush behind the counter and begin serving again. I take a round of drinks to the guys and see Keanu already has three women in his booth. I roll my eyes and do a round looking for empties before heading back to the bar.

  “Bianca.”

  I turn at the sound of the older man’s voice. He’s back at the bar and is grinning at me again. “Hi,” I say, forcing a smile.

  “Can I have another drink?”

  Well, derr.

  “Another whiskey?” I ask, pulling out a glass.

  “Only if you’ll have one with me.”

  “I can’t drink on the job, sorry.”

  He smiles at me, a leery, disgusting smile, and then he takes the glass I hand him. As he goes to get some cash out, he knocks the glass off the bar and it smashes onto the floor. Sighing, I rush around and bend down to pick up the glass before someone gets hurt. It’s then I feel his hand on my ass. On. My. Ass. I straighten quickly and spin around, glaring at him.

  “Please keep your hands off my backside.”

  His grin widens and his hand curls around my hip, pulling me closer.

  “Don’t pretend you’re not interested. I saw you watchin’ me. I’m a wealthy man, Bianca. I can do things for you . . .”

  “Oh for fuck’s sake, my name isn’t Bianca. If I wanted you, I would have given you my real name. I didn’t, because I’d rather fuck a pointy broomstick than let you anywhere near me.”

  His eyes flash and his hand tightens on my hip as he yanks me forward.

  “Don’t you ever speak to me like that again, or I’ll have your job.”

  “Let me go,” I growl. “Now.”

  He doesn’t.

  “Let me go.”

  “Let her go.”

  I hear Nate’s deep, gravelly voice come up behind me. The man looks over at him and glares. “This is a private conversation.”

  “I said,” Nate grinds out, “let her go.”

  The man lets me go and stands, taking a step towards Nate. “Be careful, boy.”

  “Or what?” Nate growls.

  I stare at the two of them, feeling my heart beginning to pound. Great, of course I’ll be the one to cause a bar fight in my second week here.

  The man throws his head back and laughs, and then he launches a punch right into Nate’s mouth. I scream, Nate lunges at him, and chaos breaks out in the bar. I watch in horror as Nate drives his fist into the man’s face, and then receives yet another punch. Blood trickles down his chin from his split lip, and his eyes are wild.

  “Break it up!” Kelly and Keanu yell at the same time, leaning down to take one man each.

  Kelly has Nate and Keanu has the older man. Nate has a swelling eye and a split lip, and he’s panting with fury. “If a girl says no, she means fuckin’ no!” he roars.

  “You’ll pay for this,” the old man bellows.

  Kelly drags Nate from the bar and I begin to panic. I rush around to Quinn, who is watching with wide eyes.

  “Are you okay?” she asks.

  “I’m okay. I’m going to see if he’s good to get home. Is that all right with you?”

  She nods. “Josh is away tonight, so he’s left me in charge. Jessica will be here in ten minutes so you’re okay to leave. I’ve got this, go.”

  I hug her quickly. “Thank you.”

  “Text me later,” she says as I throw my apron down and rush out.

  Kelly is outside with Nate, who is pacing up and down the sidewalk. When he sees me,
he charges over. “You okay?”

  “Shit, Nate,” I say, staring at his battered face.

  “He needs to go home, Av,” Kelly says. “I can’t drive. I’ve had too much to drink – we were down the road drinking before we came here so we’re all out.”

  “I’ll take him.”

  Kelly nods and glares at Nate. “Sleep it off, bro.”

  Then he gives me a quick hug before going inside again. I stare at Nate, feeling my heart swell with emotion. “I’ll take you home.”

  “Don’t wanna go home,” he grunts.

  “Where do you want to go?”

  He looks me in the eye. “With you.”

  “Nate . . .”

  “Just let me hang at your house for a few hours, Dancer. I can’t go home like this.”

  “All right, I’ll take you home and clean that up,” I say, pointing to his eye. “Then we’ll work out what to do from there.”

  He nods and I point to my car across the road. He follows me over and we both get in, silent, worried. The entire drive to my place is the same and by the time we get there, you could cut the tension in the air with a knife.

  “You didn’t have to do that for me, Nate,” I say, daring to make conversation.

  “He was sleazing onto you, and he wouldn’t accept your refusal.”

  “It happens a lot,” I offer. “I’m okay.”

  “I’m not,” he grinds out, turning to me. “I’m not, because I fuckin’ hate seeing another man’s hands on you.”

  “Nate . . .”

  He swings the car door open and climbs out, stalking to my front door without another word. I sigh and follow him, unlocking it and letting us inside. Caffy comes barreling toward us the moment we step in.

  “Okay, okay,” I say to her. “I’m coming.”

  “Nice place,” Nate says, staring around my small apartment. I was going to stay with Max or Kelly for a while, but I ended up finding this place and with the extra work figured I could afford it. It’s only tiny, but it’s mine and that’s all that matters.

  “It’s okay. It’s all I could afford.”

  “I like it,” he says. “It’s cozy.”

  I laugh weakly. “You could say that.”

  The room suddenly feels thick with tension as an awkward silence fills the small space. I shift uncomfortably and then murmur, “I’m going to get the first-aid kit. You sit down.”

  I rush off down the hall and into the washing room. I shut the door and press my back against it, dropping my head back and taking a long, deep breath. You can do this, just fix him up and call him a cab. There needs to be no more to it. Gathering all my strength, I turn and open the cupboard, pulling out my first-aid kit, then I rush back down the hall.

  Nate is sitting on the couch, staring at his phone. When he hears me he shoves it into his pocket and his gaze fixes on me. I sit beside him and suddenly feel the heat being shared between us. I want to move back, because being this close is dangerous. I open the kit, trying to focus on getting him fixed and out of here. It’s all that matters.

  “You’ll need some ice for that eye,” I say, jumping up and rushing into my small, lime-green kitchen to get an ice pack.

  I bring it back and hand it to him. He takes it and presses it to his face, not taking his eyes off me. I find a cleansing swab and I tear the packet open before pulling out the damp cloth. I hesitate, staring at the small split on his lip and the dried blood on his chin.

  “I don’t bite,” he says in a low, husky voice.

  I place the cloth against his chin gently and murmur, “Why don’t I believe that?”

  His eyes crinkle but he doesn’t smile. I gently wipe the dried blood from his chin and mouth, and then I toss the cloth onto the coffee table before tearing open another packet. I gently press the swab against his lip and a fresh drop of blood rises to the surface. I stare at it, suddenly feeling like we’re too close. I can’t breathe and I struggle to gather myself as I gently reach up and swipe the drop away with my thumb.

  Nate shudders and I lose all logic and responsibility. I can only see him, his eyes on me, his lips beneath my fingers. He takes a deep, ragged breath and his hand reaches over and gently glides behind my neck, pulling me so close our foreheads touch. “You’re making it so hard to stay away,” he breathes. “So fuckin’ hard.”

  “I’m trying,” I whisper. “I’m trying to be the good person.”

  “I’m tired of trying,” he rasps. “I don’t want to be the fucking good person anymore.”

  “Nate, it’s wrong.” I gasp as he slides his nose down and over my neck.

  “It might be wrong, but it feels so fuckin’ right.”

  “We’re hurting her. We have to stop.”

  “Is that what you really want?”

  “What I want is destroying me, Nate. I can’t possibly think straight when you’re this close . . .”

  “Then tell me to back off,” he whispers, staring at my lips.

  “You’re putting me in a place we both know I shouldn’t be.”

  “Then tell me,” he rasps, “to back off.”

  I close my eyes taking a deep, shaky breath. I should tell him to back off. Everything inside me is screaming that this is wrong but I’m struggling to fight it. I don’t want to fight it, I do want to fight it—I can’t figure out which one is the biggest. All I know is Nate is changing everything I am, and I wish more than anything that it was anyone else. But it’s not—it’s him. It’s always going to be him.

  “I can’t.” My voice is shaky but it’s sure.

  He growls and closes the distance between us, pressing his lips softly against mine. He kisses me softly, avoiding deepening it because his lip must be so tender. Instead he moves his mouth over my cheek and then down to my neck. He kisses the soft skin there, sucking little sections of it into his mouth while his hands slide up my back, underneath my shirt.

  “Nate,” I gasp, letting my head fall back.

  He moves down lower, pressing kisses to my chest and then over the tender flesh of my breast that is bulging out of my top. I tremble all over and my hands slide up his arms, starting from his wrists and going right up to his bulging biceps. He tucks his hands underneath me and lifts me into his arms, carrying me into the bedroom.

  He lays me down on the bed, letting his body fall over mine. His hands slide back up under my top, sliding against my skin while his lips settle over mine again. I kiss him until I can’t breathe; my entire body aches with want. He takes hold of my shirt and slowly pulls it up over my head, tossing it onto the floor beside the bed, and then he makes light work of my bra.

  Now I’m exposed to him, I become fully aware of the cool air against my nipples, causing them to pebble. He stares down at them and then murmurs, “Fuckin’ perfect.” He lowers his head, capturing one hard nub in his lips and sucking. Warmth spreads through me and tingles shoot right to my sex. I make a strangled, whimpering sound as I press my hips up against his.

  I feel the roughness of his jeans against my skin as he grinds against me. I close my eyes and my lips part on a moan as I spread my legs, thrusting my hips upwards. He makes a ragged, strangled sound as he leans back, taking hold of my pants and jerking them down. He tosses them aside the moment they’re free of my feet and he stares down at my body, his breathing becoming shallow.

  “You are,” he breathes. “The most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”

  I swallow as he steps forward, running his fingertips over every part of me, causing little tingles to shoot through my body. Then his eyes drop to my sex.

  “Fuck,” he growls. “You’re so fuckin’ wet for me. I can see it.”

  I whimper as he reaches down, swiping his finger up the damp moisture gathering between my legs. He grips his shirt and he pulls it off quickly, throwing it onto the floor with the rest of the clothes. Then he takes his jeans and jerks them off so quickly I can only blink as he goes from dressed to naked. So beautifully naked. His body is long, muscled, and perfect.<
br />
  I rake my gaze down, taking in his broad shoulders, his wide chest with a sprinkling of dark hair that’s barely noticeable but gives him that manly feel, over his washboard abs and then I follow his V down to an impressive long cock that has me licking my lips. It’s automatic, a man so stunning, and it almost feels surreal to me. He grins as he watches me taking him in, and then he kneels onto the bed, taking my knees in his hands.

  “Spread, honey,” he murmurs, pressing my legs open.

  I do as he asks, opening myself to him. He stares down at me and his eyes glisten with lust as he takes my hips in his hands and brings my hips up. Then his mouth is on me, right there, his tongue swirling around my clit. I cry out his name, arching and pushing my hips up into his face. He groans against my damp flesh, flicking my clit harder and faster, driving me closer and closer to the edge.

  “Baby,” he murmurs against my flesh. “Come for me.”

  I arch and cry out his name over and over as his tongue works my pussy, bringing to me heights I’ve never imagined, even in my wildest fantasies. Then he slides two fingers into my heat, no pause, nothing gentle, just a deep, intense thrust that sends me over the edge. I scream his name as fireworks erupt in my body, traveling to every nerve ending.

  “Nate,” I cry, squirming beneath him as he licks out every last shudder.

  He pulls his mouth from my pussy and I feel the cool air tickle my skin as he slides his body up mine. He nuzzles my neck as he reaches down and takes my leg, bringing it up around his hip. “You on the pill?” he murmurs into my ear before sucking gently on my lobe. I shudder, closing my eyes and rasping, “Yes.”

  He growls and I can feel him probing against me, tempting, taunting. He runs a hand down my side until he reaches my hip; there he holds it tightly as he gently slides inside. God, oh God. He fills me so beautifully, stretching me around his long, thick length. We both groan as sensations wash through our bodies. My nerves tingle as he sinks in to the hilt, filling me completely. Then he slowly drags his hips out before thrusting back in again.

  “Fuck, Dancer, so fuckin’ tight.”

  “Oh God,” I cry, spreading my legs wider, letting him in deeper. “Yes.”