Forsaken Dreamscape (Nevermor)

by Lenore, Lani

  “There’s a savage maiden, who has remained secretive and hostile this whole time, then there’s a very charming boy who nearly died today, whose thoughts are still a mystery to me. There’s a rather large boy who looks intimidating, yet is more open than any of us – seems to have picked up on more as well. Then there’s the one who is levelheaded. He keeps my feet on the ground and makes sure I don’t fly off in the clouds somewhere. The strangest thing is that this same boy used to hate me, and now it’s almost as if–”

  “That was the past,” Nix broke in. “Things change. This boy might not be who he used to be.”

  Wren looked into his eyes, knowing that only one of them was able to look back at her, but it was blue and intense.

  “Maybe not, but he tells me he’s going to leave me.”

  This made him turn away from her gaze.

  “I don’t understand why you care whether I leave. It’s because you promised Rifter, isn’t it? You’d deliver us to him.”

  No. It wasn’t that. There was more to it. She didn’t want him to leave because he cared about her. He protected her, kept her safe and sane, and couldn’t quite deny that she felt closer to him than anyone in a long time.

  “I don’t see what it matters,” he went on. “As soon as you get there and see Rifter again, you know you’ll forget that any of the rest of us even exist. Don’t try to deny it.”

  “But that isn’t true!” she insisted.

  “It is,” he said, turning his body away from her. “We both know that.”

  Despite the unlikely sort of friendship they’d developed, his words made her angry. While it may have been true that she wanted to see Rifter, that didn’t mean she had no feeling for the rest of them. Why was he being cruel to her? She wanted to convince him that it wasn’t true, but she wondered if it was even worth the effort.

  “The past few days have been trying,” she began. “I’ve been concerned for all of us.”

  “Oh, you were?” he asked in mock surprise.

  “You really don’t believe me?”

  He sighed, anger forming in his eye.

  “I’ve seen you’re starting to question,” he said. “But not nearly enough.”

  “Then tell me,” she begged. “What do you see that I don’t?”

  This was exactly what she’d had on her mind when she’d been listening to Finn and Calico through the tent, but somehow felt she would have more luck with him now.

  She was right. He shook his head, denying her.

  “I promised I wouldn’t influence you,” he said, turning back to face her. “That means I don’t give you my theories.”

  Wren sighed, discouraged.

  “What do you expect of me, then?” she asked. “You obviously have some idea of that. What am I supposed to do?”

  “It’s not my place,” he said. “You’re still stuck on him, and that means you don’t need me.”

  She stared back in disbelief. Unreasonable! He was that much against Rifter that he wouldn’t help her unless she denied Rifter and changed her mind? Perhaps then he didn’t really care about her as he said – or as much as she had thought.

  This made her so discouraged that she could not look at him any longer. If his annoyance over her loyalty to Rifter was the only thing he could think of, she had nothing else to say.

  Turning, she stormed off without another word, through the cave and out toward the water. She distanced herself, but was not quite surprised to hear his footsteps following after her.

  “Wren, you know you shouldn’t wander off by yourself.” At his protest, she was unable to hold her tongue.

  “What do you mean by all this, Nix?” she demanded, turning heatedly. “I’ll have to choose you over Rifter? I’ll have to decide to turn against him on my own? Then you’ll tell me what you think?”

  He was silent a moment, looking back to her with sincerity.

  “In a way,” he said. “Yes.”

  Wren shook her head. “That won’t happen,” she said firmly. “I can’t turn from Rifter without understanding the whole story. I have to go meet him with the others and hear what he has to say.”

  She wrapped her arms around herself and looked down, disappointed that he wasn’t going to come around. He would leave and she would feel awful about it, unsure why, but then she’d see Rifter, and yes, things would be better, but she refused to believe that she wouldn’t care about the rest of them when she saw him again.

  She raised her head, intending to ask him for a few moments’ peace, but something very different came out.

  “I should never have left,” she said in a rush of breath. “I did it for Maxwell, but if I’d only stayed in Nevermor, Rifter would never have forgotten about me and perhaps this never would have happened.”

  Nix didn’t say anything, maybe sensing that she was not done, and to her own surprise, she found she was not.

  “Those children wouldn’t have died, and perhaps the demon wouldn’t have ever made contact with Rifter! And even before that, the world was going along in an endless cycle, and I disrupted it! I insisted that Rifter know the truth. Everything comes back to me! This is my fault in its entirety!”

  “You can’t put this on yourself,” Nix was quick to say. “It’s not your fault.”

  “It is,” she insisted, seeing clearly for the first time. Nothing he said could have changed her mind. “Nothing has gone right since then.”

  “What do you mean?”

  She had avoided speaking of the last few years, even to Rifter, but now it was all flowing out of her, gaining momentum, and she could not stop it.

  “I let Max go to be adopted, and I wondered for a long time whether or not that was the best choice. Well, I know it was the right one, but still, I felt sadness over it for a long time. I still do, but I tried to console myself with the idea that Rifter was going to come back. I’d be able to forget the pain. When he didn’t, I stayed at Miss Nora’s Home, and she found me a job, cooking for a well-to-do family across the city. But even that fell through on the night that Whisper came back. I spent the last two years in an asylum.”

  He didn’t respond, and when she glanced at him, she could tell by the look on his face that he was lost.

  “It’s a sort of mix between hospital and penitentiary for mad people. They thought I was a murderess – that I had killed those children at Miss Nora’s – and when I told them it was a fairy that had done it, they locked me away.”

  Her words crumbled to silence. Perhaps now was his chance to speak, but he hesitated. The echo of her own words was hanging in the air.

  “I guess I’d always thought you’d found some way to salvage your old life and be happy without this place,” he said finally.

  She looked up in surprise. “You thought about me?”

  He didn’t want to admit it. He shrugged and looked away, but the sentiment touched her. She opened her mouth to tell him so, when her eyes fell on something behind him on the cave wall – something she hadn’t noticed before.

  Wren narrowed her eyes, unsure, but she stepped forward, forgetting about Nix, moving toward the crooked slab of rock, upon which words were written.

  She had seen this wall before, but it had slipped from her memory. It had once been in a different place. The boys had shown it to her in the ice caves of the tundra – a secret kept from Rifter, but a respected monument to them. On this wall, they had recorded the names of the fallen, every former member of the Wolf Pack that had died in this world.

  The changes to the island had brought it here, but Wren moved toward it now, entranced. Though she had seen it before, most of those names meant very little to her. In fact, only one brought back a memory.

  FANG. The name was etched near the top where it was meant to be, along with others who had received the highest honor – they had been killed by the Scourge.

  “Henry…” she uttered, tracing the name with her finger, feeling the wavering dips in the groove.

  Behind her, Nix did not move.
He had been there that day, hadn’t he? They all had been. They had been on the ship. Henry had threatened the Scourge, trying to defend her…

  That was as much as she could remember about when it happened. She couldn’t recall that moment – that one, horrible moment.

  “I don’t remember how he died,” she said sadly.

  “Best that you don’t,” Nix responded, his voice soft. That was all he offered.

  If Wren had tried hard enough, she could have blamed every single thing on herself, even back to the start of it all. Her dreams had been what had brought them to Nevermor in the first place.

  She knew that not everything about this world had been terrible back then, but for now, she could only focus on her regrets.

  “I never meant for any of this to happen,” she said, her voice veering on the edge of a sob. “I only wanted to be with my brothers, and now I don’t have either of them!”

  Wren had nearly lost herself to this sorrow, her knees weak, when she felt a touch on her shoulder. She turned as strong arms enveloped her, pulling her close, and her sobs caught in her throat at the mere shock of it. Nix had embraced her! He who had once been disgusted by her mere presence had found a soft spot inside for her sorrow. And the most unusual thing was that she felt perfectly comfortable in it.

  She closed her eyes and let her face rest against his neck as she cried, clinging to him as she had her last shreds of sanity. He stroked her hair gently without saying a word, and she found herself hoping that he would not let her go.

  Wren held onto him until her sobs began to quiet and the haze around her mind began to clear. By then, she was keenly aware of him – of how solid and warm he was.

  This isn’t right…

  “Wren,” he started, but she had become too overwhelmed by the guilt of how she’d been clinging to him, and she did not let him finish – would perhaps never know what he’d been planning to say.

  Before she could rethink it, she had pushed away from him.

  “I’m sorry. I lost myself. I shouldn’t…” she stammered. “Just because Rifter’s not here–”

  “Rifter?” he questioned. In an instant, his face had changed. His eyes narrowed and there was a sharp edge to his voice.

  Wren was suddenly hit by a barrage of realizations – of every time she’d gotten just a little closer to him – and understood that she was wrong for it, but at the same time, she couldn’t deny that she’d sought his approval or that she had wanted to be near him. The embrace was just the next step – the absent proof that he would reciprocate those feelings.

  She wanted to backtrack, but she didn’t quite know how. She wasn’t able to stop him with words or actions before he had shaken his head at her in disbelief and walked away, leaving her only to look after him, abashed and guilty.

  3

  Toss had not quite meant to eavesdrop – it wasn’t in his nature to intrude – and it had only been by chance that he had been down by the water, observing the fallen nightmare creature when he’d heard the voices. While he knew he should not have been listening, he could not keep his curiosity contained.

  Wren and Nix had been having a disagreement that echoed through the cavern, and he’d been concerned. He’d followed them into the tunnel – had seen what had transpired. Now Nix was coming back alone, and Toss knew what he must do.

  His loyalty to his leader demanded it.

  Nix looked perturbed, hesitating in step when he saw his brother there. They observed each other a moment, and while Nix might have liked to pass by without speaking, Toss kept in his path.

  “You’re up late,” Nix commented, raising a wary eye.

  “I’m often awake at night,” Toss said, conversationally. “Don’t have much reason to keep up with the sun. How about you?”

  “I was just going to bed,” Nix said firmly. He picked up his feet to walk on, and though Toss did not step forward to hinder him physically, his voice stopped his brother’s advance.

  “Is Wren back there?”

  “She’ll come along when she’s ready,” Nix said swiftly, aiming once again to walk past.

  “I know what you’ve got on your mind,” Toss said boldly, believing that his brother wouldn’t latch onto it unless he said it outright. Toss had never been one for confrontation, but he had stood up to Nix before – often concerning Wren – and he was equally fearless toward it now.

  Nix looked up at him with confusion in his eye, which was quickly followed by contempt.

  “I overheard you talking,” Toss confessed. “You’re starting to have feelings for her.”

  “You were listening to our conversation?” This angered Nix even more than the accusation – or at least seemed to. Toss wondered if he was putting on a front, turning to violence to mask his true feelings.

  “It’s more than that,” Toss assured him. “I’ve seen the way you look at her. It’s wrong of you to try to sway her. She was with Rifter first.”

  Nix seemed shocked. His stare was hard for a moment, and then the corners of his mouth turned up in an amused smile.

  “I’m surprised. I see that not only have you grown a few feet, but you’ve grown a pair as well.”

  “I’m serious, Nix,” Toss warned. “It’s obvious that she still wants to be with Rifter. She’s doing all of this for him.”

  “Are you jealous, Toss?” Nix asked haughtily. “Don’t like the idea that she might pick me over you?”

  “I would never do that to Rifter out of simple respect, and you shouldn’t either!”

  “If I decide I want to have feelings for her, that’s my business, not yours!” Nix yelled, getting agitated now – bringing out a fury that seemed too familiar.

  They stared at each other for several moments, two brothers who had perhaps never seen reason to fight before, now to the point of anger over accusations that could not be proven. Toss, however, remained serious concerning the matter.

  “I’m telling you: don’t do this, Nix. You’re asking for trouble.”

  Nix looked as though he might have liked to say many things in his own defense, or maybe take a swing, but Toss was surprised when he kept himself composed.

  “Do me a favor, Toss,” Nix said instead – calm as death. “Don’t give me any more advice.”

  Nix brushed past him, jolting Toss’ shoulder with his own as he went by. Toss did not say anything else. Perhaps he had not gotten through, but he felt he had done his duty. He’d given the warning, and for now that was all he would do to enforce it. He only hoped it sank in enough to prevent a repeat of Nix and Rifter’s unfortunate past.

  And over all things, over a girl.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  1

  Mach opened the cavern lights early the next day, letting in the faint sunlight of a dreary morning. Wren had finally gone back to the tent she’d shared with Calico after being up half the night, first having talked to Nix and then worrying over him. She had not been asleep the next morning when the others had begun to stir.

  When she stepped out, she saw that the rest were already about, gathering tools and materials into satchels, preparing to go to work on whatever Mach had planned for them so that they could cross the canyon. She wondered briefly why no one had come after her, but decided now to simply pick up and help with what she could.

  She hadn’t gotten far beyond the flap before a low voice touched her ears, calling for her.

  “Wren!”

  She turned to see Finn standing behind her – closer than she’d expected – and he hastily pulled her back behind the shelter.

  “What are you doing out of bed?” she gasped. “You need to rest!”

  “I’m fine,” he promised. “Sore, but alright.”

  She remembered how badly his wounds had looked yesterday, and she did not believe him. She thought he was downplaying his injuries for the sake of the group, but he had quickly turned her away from the thought of that.

  “I need to talk to you.”

  “What is it?” she
asked in concern. She could tell by the look in his eyes that it was a serious matter. He had always been the confessor among them.

  Finn took a deep breath, looking straight into her with his luminous eyes. “I spoke with Calico last night,” he began.

  “Yes?” she said anxiously. Finally, was she going to hear it?

  “She probably wouldn’t like me to tell you, but I thought you should know. She saw a vision and, it’s got her thinking some bad things – about you.”

  “Me?” Wren was stunned. Calico had been acting strangely toward her since the beginning. Was this something new, or an old vendetta?

  “She said she saw dark clouds rolling over the old Tribal camp. There was a light there, and a dark stranger, standing on the hill. Then, the clouds slowly covered everything, and it was dark. Lightning flashed and the stranger was gone. And you were standing in his place. There was fire.”

  Wren listened, but was not sure what he had meant for her to see.

  “What does it mean?”

  “She wouldn’t say,” he said. “Only that it troubled her. I’ve thought about it myself, but haven’t been able to make sense of it. I don’t know if she even does. But the fact that she saw you in the vision seemed to upset her.”

  Wren listened, waiting for him to go on, but he said nothing else for the moment. It was just as well. One thing she had learned was that if she wanted to know something, she had to ask. None of them liked to tell her things willingly.

  “Does it bother you?” she asked, trying to choose her words carefully. “Do you trust her dream? Do you think it’s an omen about meeting Rifter?”

  Finn was silent a moment, staring at the cloth wall of the tent in thought, watching the shadows pass.

  “I’ve found no reason to let it keep me away,” he said. “I don’t think we completely understand everything yet, but I feel that our answers will be there with Rifter. Danger or not, my curiosity will not let me turn back. I must know the truth about his memories.”

  With that, Wren could agree.

  “But one thing Calico did tell me was that her Tribal settlement isn’t far once we cross the canyon. She says they are peaceful. We can stay the night there and we can take whatever supplies we need.”