Uncontrollable (Key West #3)

by C. A. Harms

  “I’ve never been surer,” I said. “I owe it to the both of them, Jett. Avery deserves better than I’ve given her.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  Avery

  “Oh yes,” I moaned much louder than I anticipated. The problem was I didn’t feel the slightest bit embarrassed. “Yes, right there, a little harder, deeper,” I instructed as my eyes rolled back into my head and I fisted the sheet beneath me.

  “Does that feel good right there?”

  All I could do was nod. I was entirely too invested in the pleasure to form complete, meaningful sentences.

  “Wow.” Harper’s voice broke through my euphoria. “If I didn’t know better myself, I would think there was a whole lot of kink going on in here. My customers are gonna think I’m running a secret sex shop in the massage room.”

  I wanted to yell at her to stop killing my buzz, but the words got hung up when I tried to force them out. The only sound I could make was moan after moan of ecstasy.

  I hadn’t even noticed the moans coming from Quinn on the next bed over until that moment. “Harper, you are without a doubt the most amazing sister-in-law.” Quinn groaned as the massage therapist, Greg, rubbed her lower back, digging in just a little deeper.

  “I’ll also be your dead sister-in-law if you keep moaning like that. Jett will kill me if he hears you. It already took hours to convince him to let you come today. Last week when you girls came in, he stood guard outside the doorway.”

  “Greg thought he was going to die a slow death. Jett scared the hell out of him.” I caught the alarmed look on Greg’s face and buried my face in the headrest to hide my laughter. Jett was a caveman to begin with, but his behavior had only intensified after the wedding.

  “Okay, okay, enough about Jett,” Quinn whined. “Greg can’t concentrate when you’re scaring him. Please do not kill my massage.”

  Harper snickered and turned back to me, her gaze scanning over me. “How are you feeling?” It was a loaded question. She was asking about the pregnancy, Kade, and the situation between him and me.

  “Good,” I assured her without giving her anything more. I closed my eyes and hoped she’d drop it.

  I have no idea why I actually thought Harper would let it die.

  “That’s all you’re giving me? Honestly, Avery, spill some details.” When I opened my eyes, she was using the “determined Harper” glare.

  I stared right back. “Bug Quinn for gossip.”

  “Um, no.” She leaned back against the wall, crossing her arms over her chest. “Jett is my brother, and the last thing I want is too many details when it comes to those two. Quinn knows this. That’s why she always throws things back at me that I don’t need to know. My brother taught her to evade me like that, so getting details out of her is no longer any fun. The last thing I want to know is how long my brother lasted this morning or how they had sex on the kitchen table.”

  She faked a shiver and I laughed. I looked over at Quinn, and she nodded to confirm what Harper had just said.

  “Well done,” I told her. “Table sex.” Then a thought occurred to me. “You are going to bleach said table when you get home, right? I mean, we’ve eaten dinner off it.”

  Quinn laughed, and Harper hung her head, her nostrils flaring in disgust. “Honestly, quit trying to avoid the question,” Harper groaned.

  “I’m not avoiding,” I replied. “You asked me how things were, and I said they were good.”

  “You are such a brat. Have you heard from Kade?”

  And so it begins. “I haven’t seen him or heard from him since the doctor’s appointment,” I told her, hoping that would be enough information.

  “He’s been to the house a few times,” Quinn announced, catching both my attention and Harper’s. “I heard him and Jett talking one night, and he said he’s working on clearing his head. He wants to move past Jenna’s death. He told Jett he could no longer live with the guilt.”

  The idea of Kade being able to move on and heal sent a small spark of hope through me. A sense of pride followed, because I knew he could do it; he just had to want to make the move forward.

  ***

  On more than one occasion, the nurturer in me wanted to call Kade and check on him, to offer my support and friendship. But I knew I had to let him get through this on his own. It had been days since I last spoke with him, and I hoped that meant he was working on healing. I filled my days the best I could with work, spa days, shopping, and trips to the grocery store to stock up on junk food, and between my job and the girls, I had little time to think.

  “Beach time before you can no longer wear a bikini.” Callie shimmied her hips and danced around in a circle. She had been hassling me to go since the day at Allure, and now she’d left me no choice. “Move it, Momma, I need some sun. It’s Sunday, my day off, and I refuse to spend it indoors.” She rushed past me, slapping my ass on the way.

  “Ow.” I lurched forward and narrowed my eyes at her.

  “Oh, please. In six to seven months, you’re gonna be in a whole hell of a lot more pain. You better get used to the sting, woman, because your cooter is gonna be on fire.”

  My eyes widened. “What the hell does my cooter have to do with you slapping my ass?”

  Callie shrugged as she slipped her cover-up over her bathing suit. “Pain’s pain, lovely, now move your ass. I’m ready to soak up the sun.”

  She lost me, like completely lost me three sentences ago. Sometimes she was such an airhead.

  ***

  Upon arriving at the beach, Callie and I both grabbed our bags from the backseat of her cute little convertible and scanned the area for the best spot. As we walked toward an open space on the left, Callie placed her hand on my arm to stop me.

  “What?” I asked just as my eyes connected with Kade’s. He was leaning against the retaining wall and near the seating area closest to the burger hut. He had his arms crossed over his chest and was talking to a girl with jet-black hair. She wore a skimpy bikini and had a beach bag draped over her shoulder.

  My stomach tightened with jealousy, but I brushed it off and continued to move ahead as if the scene didn’t bother me. But his gaze lifted and met mine before I could look away. He cocked his head to the side, and a grin spread over his lips. Quickly averting my eyes, I looked out toward the area we were claiming as our own for the day and nudged Callie along, pretending I hadn’t just been caught gawking.

  “You do realize he’s on his way over here, right?” she asked, and I swear my stomach felt as if it hit the ground. “And let me just add that he looks really yummy. All tan and wet, his muscles bulging and calling out for—”

  I narrowed my eyes at her. “Enough,” I snapped.

  She laughed at me. Literally laughed as she shook her head and pulled her towel out of her bag. “You know you were thinking the same thing,” she said, turning her back to me.

  I was about to make some comment about Jude and how she should just throw herself at him and leave me alone, but Kade’s voice from behind me broke my train of thought.

  “How are you, Avery?”

  I looked back over my shoulder, and my eyes met his. “I’m good. How about you?”

  “I’m getting there,” he replied, his gaze still locked on mine.

  I turned around fully to face him, and as I did, he scanned my body, stopping at my waist. “Is everything going okay with—?” He pointed toward my stomach.

  I smiled and nodded. He lifted his head, and when he saw my smile, he couldn’t hold his own back. “Do you need anything?”

  “No, really, I’m good,” I assured him.

  “If you do, you know you can call me. Anytime, no matter what it is.”

  “I know, Kade,” I replied. “You just keep taking care of you. I’m good, really. The baby’s good.”

  He stepped back, and I instantly wanted to touch him. I fisted my hands to control the urge.

  “Well, uh, I’m gonna get going,” he said. He sounded flat and sad compared to
a few moments ago. I nodded in response, and he took another step back.

  “Bye, Callie.” He held up his hand and looked over my shoulder at her.

  “Later, Kade,” she said.

  I watched his back as he walked toward the parking lot. Just as he reached the top of the hill, he looked over his shoulder and waved once more.

  I slowly lifted my hand and offered one in return as my stomach got that empty feeling once again. Waiting on the sidelines, hoping Kade could find a way to heal on his own was going to be harder than I thought. It was in my nature to want to fix things; it’s just who I am.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Kade

  I stood back, hidden by the cars as I watched Avery. She looked so beautiful standing out on the beach with her blonde hair flowing in the gentle breeze off the water. The waves washing in behind her only added to her beauty. When she lifted her shirt over her head, my body responded immediately. She may think in that crazy head of hers that I wasn’t attracted to her, but she couldn’t be more wrong. I had her once, and yeah it was a disaster because I was such as ass, but that one time let me know what I’d been missing. The strong urge to touch her washed over me. Her bending over to smooth out the towel at her feet didn’t help calm my desire.

  I desired nothing more than to march back down to the beach and pull her body against mine. I wanted to tell her I needed her and I’d been an idiot to think I could stay away. Only I couldn’t, because I had to be sure I was able to move forward completely. I didn’t want to hurt Avery any more than I already had. Clearing all the garbage from my mind was the first priority. Then I would ask Avery for forgiveness. I just hoped she didn’t tell me I was too late.

  I walked toward my truck, and once I was inside I opened the glove box, pulled my wallet out, and took out the black-and-white image of my child. Holding it securely in my hands, I smiled brightly. I was still amazed that I was actually going to be a father. Images of me holding a small baby in my arms while Avery sat tucked against my side filled my mind.

  I had lived in the darkness of my guilt for so long that I truly never believed I deserved happiness. After all, it was my fault Jenna would never have a family or even be able to get married, for that matter. That knowledge ripped at me daily. But I was doing everything I could to move on from that guilt. I wanted this happiness with Avery. It washed over me that day in the doctor’s office, and I’d never felt anything like it before. I didn’t want to just give Avery part of me, either. She was so selfless, and to give anything other than all of me wasn’t acceptable.

  I trailed my thumb over the sonogram image, then placed it back into the safety of my wallet. Soon we would be back at the doctor’s office, and I’d get to hear the amazing sound of my child’s heartbeat again.

  In that moment I realized just how big of a gift I’d been blessed with. One day soon, I would be holding the little person whose heart beat throughout that room—the same little person who I would be responsible for. I also realized more than ever just how important it was for me to change. One day that child may be faced with a life-changing event, and the last thing I would want would be for them to handle it the way I’d chosen to.

  Chapter Twenty

  Avery

  I braced myself on the edge of the counter, yawning so big I worried my jaw might break.

  “Wow, girl,” Helen said as she reached around me to grab the chart from the holder on the wall. “Your shift just started and you’re already exhausted.”

  I forced a smile as I rubbed at my eyes. “I feel like I haven’t slept in days. These last few weeks have really drained me.”

  “Well thank God the first trimester only lasts three months. You have, what, a little over a week of that left?”

  “Yeah.” I yawned once more. “I really hope it gets better.”

  A loud slap, slap on the doorway made us turn quickly. “Liven up, girls. Ambulance is on the way. They’re bringing in a female, late forties, head injuries.” Brad, another nurse, darted from the doorway as we scrambled from the room after him. “Head-on collision. She is unresponsive and bleeding heavily from a cut on her forehead,” he continued as we followed him. “Appears to have a broken leg. Any other injuries have not yet been reported.”

  By now, we could hear sirens, and we watched through the glass doors as the ambulance pulled up and the paramedics rushed out to open the back. Once the ER doors slid open, they hurried the gurney through the entrance.

  “Her vitals are good. The bleeding has slowed. She regained consciousness a couple of times along the way, but only briefly.”

  The paramedic continued to give the status of the patient, but everything he said quickly faded away when I saw the woman lying on the gurney as it passed in front of me. My legs gave way beneath me, and I slumped to the floor as the bed holding my mother slipped by.

  “Avery, are you okay?” Brad asked as he knelt at my side and helped me up.

  All I could do was shake my head as the tears fell heavily. My chest felt tight, and that tingling sensation you get just before you’re about to pass out filled my face and hands.

  “Do you know the patient?” he asked with a worried expression.

  “Yes,” I breathed, trying so hard to regain my composure only to fail miserably. “My mother.” The words burned my throat as a sob ripped through me

  He nodded as he led me toward the small lounge we sometimes ate lunch in.

  “I need to go to her. I need to know,” I insisted as I tried to move around his large body. Instead, Brad wrapped his arms around my shoulders and pulled me close for a hug.

  “You need to relax as much as possible and let the doctors do their job.” He rubbed his hand along my upper back to soothe me. “Just breathe, Avery. You have to stay calm for the baby.”

  I allowed my body to relax just a little before I realized something else. “Oh my God,” I gasped. “I need to call my father.”

  ***

  Not even thirty minutes later, the sounds of my stepdad’s cries filled the halls. Hearing his anguish broke something inside me.

  A short while later, I sat by Robert’s side. As I held his hand in mine, I listened to the staff converse. What they were saying only made me feel emptier inside. The force of the impact caused my mother to hit her head against the steering wheel, and the attending physician, Dr. Heather Mynes, had called in a neurosurgeon to assess my mother’s injuries. When the neurosurgeon arrived, he determined my mother had a traumatic brain injury and her frontal lobe was bleeding, but he didn’t yet know the extent of the damage.

  My mother, the woman who had spent her entire life going without so she could give me everything, lay motionless in the bed before us as the doctors and nurses hurried around preparing her for surgery.

  Time felt as if it was passing by in slow motion, even though everything was happening in fast-forward. With my mother’s life hanging in the balance, my world felt as if it was at a standstill.

  Even after they rushed her from the room, my dad and I remained perfectly still, neither of us speaking as we stared at the empty space that once held my mother. I wasn’t sure just how long had passed before Brad entered.

  “Avery,” he whispered as he knelt before me.

  I slowly brought my gaze to meet his and blinked, trying to register his face. “Yes?” I finally asked. The amount of effort just that one word took was exhausting.

  “Sweetheart, there are people waiting in the lobby. Family and friends,” he said.

  I shook my head and looked over at my stepfather, who still sat motionless. “We can’t. It’s still too raw. We need some time, please.”

  He squeezed my hand and leaned forward to kiss my forehead. “Okay, I’ll update them briefly and let them know you’ll be out in a while,” he whispered before standing up and making his way to the door.

  When I heard it click shut behind him, I turned in my chair to face Robert, who was staring at the space my mother’s bed had just vacated. “Dad?” I tried
to hide the pain in my voice, but there was no hope. I was dying inside, and I needed him.

  When he lifted his head, his eyes were glistening with unshed tears. “She has to make it, Avery. I don’t think I’ll survive without her.” His voice cracked as he spoke, cutting me deep, because I was thinking the same thing. I needed my mother; she had to be okay. But I knew I had to be strong for Robert now.

  “She will,” I reassured him, “and we’ll be here to help her every step of the way.”

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Kade

  “Seriously, asshole?” Jett grumbled.

  I chuckled as I looked down at him lying stretched out on the floor at my feet with his head tucked securely under his kitchen sink as he twisted the wrench. He had just unscrewed the P-trap in search of Quinn’s ring. She was washing dishes and apparently knocked it off the shelf into the drain.

  Quinn stood off to the side giggling as he wiped the water from his bare chest.

  “Squirt me with the sprayer one more time, Kade, and I’m gonna throw your ass in the pool,” he threatened, then turned to Quinn and narrowed his eyes. “Keep on laughing, babe, and you’ll be next.”

  I picked up the sprayer once more and held my finger to my lips to silence her. She bit on her lip to stifle her laughter as her gaze shifted back to Jett. I waited until he was fully back under the sink and pressed the button.

  “Motherfucker!” Jett’s legs kicked outward, and he dropped his wrench to the floor at his side before he began to crawl out from under the sink.

  Both Quinn and I bolted for the door, but he beat us there and snagged Quinn around the waist before throwing her over his shoulder.

  “I didn’t do it, Kade did,” she wailed as she wiggled in his arms. He smacked her ass and she yelped. “So help me God, Jett, if you throw me in that pool, I will cut you off. I swear it! You won’t get any for a year.”