Bye-Bye Baby

by Morgana Phoenix

  Putting his hands up, Cole circled the counter and took his brother’s spot on the stool. “He’s so bossy,” he mumbled to Damon and just caught the hint of a smile still smothered behind the counter.

  They watched as Sloan broke the eggs into the bowl and added the salt and pepper. He turned his head and peered over at Damon.

  “Mind grabbing the milk for me?”

  Damon’s gaze darted to Cole, silently asking permission.

  Cole shrugged and nod. “You heard the man.”

  Bewilderment drew his small brows together, but he edged away from his hiding place and padded lightly around the counter. His bare little feet made hardly any sound as he passed Cole. His hospital gown rustled. Cole made a mental note to grab the kid some clothes.

  He and Sloan both watched as he struggled to yank open the fridge door, putting all his weight into the motion before the rubber seal gave way. He staggered slightly before catching himself and reaching inside.

  The milk sat on the top shelf in its jug. Damon had to go up on his toes to grab it, then bring it to his chest as he backed up. He relinquished one hand to shut the door and the jug slipped. Cole saw it happening before it even happened. The plastic struck the linoleum with a crack and milk burst out in all directions in a white spray. Cole leapt up, but the damage had been done.

  Milk rained from the fridge door, the counter, and the floors and off Damon as he stood in the puddle, his complexion in competition with the liquid dripping off the hem of his gown. He stared at his tiny hands, like he couldn’t believe they’d betrayed him. Then his head came up and his eyes darted from Sloan to Cole.

  “I’m sorry!” he blurted, his voice barely audible around the sheer terror turning his eyes glassy.

  His entire body seemed to be vibrating, counteracting with the quick, shallow breath he seemed to be struggling to take. A dark stain appeared around his midsection, widening and trickling down to stain the milk. The stench of urine punched through the apartment like a fist.

  “Hey.” Sloan took a step towards him and Damon flinched back so hard, he slammed into the fridge. His foot slid out from under him and he hit the floor with enough force to make Cole feel it.

  Cole was next to him in a heartbeat—his first mistake. Damon shrieked and scuttled backward, cramming himself into a small ball in the corner with his arms over his head. A strange, almost animal sound shook through his entire frame that was a tossup between a whine and a wail. His terror was a physical backlash that seemed to sweep off him like an infected wound.

  “It’s only milk,” Cole murmured quietly. “No one’s angry, Damon.” He stepped around the puddle and knelt next to the boy. Carefully, he reached out a hand and lightly touched Damon’s arm.

  Damon sobbed harder like the touch burned him. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry!”

  Not sure what to do, feeling powerless, angry, and scared, Cole ignored all his better instincts and dragged Damon into his arms.

  “Stop!” he hissed into the top of Damon’s head. His own voice wavered and broke. “No one’s going to hurt you. Do you hear me, Damon? I won’t let anyone hurt you ever again.”

  “What’s going on?” Beth shuffled into the room, blurry-eyed and sleep tussled. But all that vanished the second she caught sight of Damon. “What happened?”

  “Had an accident,” Cole said in his best nonchalant tone. “But we’re fine.”

  Beth looked from him to the rigid figure in his arms, then down at the puddle around Cole’s feet. She seemed to realize immediately what had happened.

  She edged towards them. “Hey, how about a bath?”

  Damon was still breathing hard, but he wasn’t wheezing, or apologizing. He didn’t speak either.

  “That sounds like an awesome idea,” Cole agreed for him. “When you come out, we’ll have breakfast, okay?”

  Damon didn’t say anything, but he allowed Beth to take his hand and lead him out of the room.

  Once they were out of sight and the soft click of the bathroom door shutting filled the silence, Cole slumped against the cupboard. His knees lifted and he buried his wet eyes behind his hand. The cupboard next to him thumped as Sloan slid down next to him. Neither spoke for what felt like hours.

  “Do you know what got me through those nights?” Sloan broke the silence.

  Cole sniffled and shook his head.

  Sloan paused, then said, “You.”

  Scrubbing away evidence of his own emotional breakdown, Cole looked at him. “Me?”

  Sloan grinned humorlessly back at him. “You,” he repeated. “You’d come into my room after each beating and I’d be lying there in bed, hurting like a mother fucker and you’d crawl in with me and tell me it was okay. That tomorrow you’d take my place so I wouldn’t get hurt again.”

  He remembered that.

  “You never let me.”

  Sloan frowned at him. “The point is you kept me together. You were my reason to keep going. That’s what he needs. He needs a reason to believe not everything in the world is evil.” He pushed to his feet and reached for the mop. “He needs a reason to keep going.”

  Cole watched him as he dragged the roped fabric over the mess.

  “Where do I find that?” he asked.

  His brother shrugged. “You don’t. He needs to find his own.”

  Cole frowned. “I need something now! I need to make him stop hurting.”

  Sloan ceased mopping to face him. “Things like this take time and patience. As much as I wish I could make his pain go away, it’s not going to happen overnight. At this point, all you can do is love him and show him that not everyone is going to turn away from him.” He set the mop aside. “I’m going to run to the store and grab milk.”

  Cole didn’t stop him. He stayed on the floor, in the corner where Damon had gone for sanctuary and prayed for the first time in a very long time for help. Not for himself, but for Damon. Although, he did pray for himself. He prayed for the power to fix what felt infinitely unfixable and the wisdom not to make it worse. He wasn’t sure if it worked. He hadn’t prayed since his mom had died, which was around the time he also stopped going to church and believing there was anyone out there listening to people like him. How could there be when he and Sloan suffered so much and no man or God ever stepped in? Damn, but he needed help. He wasn’t sure he was strong enough on his own.

  The front door opened.

  “Hello?” Lily’s hesitant voice muffled the rush of water from the bathroom.

  Two set of footsteps filled the apartment. A moment later, Lily was standing on the other side of the counter, peering down at him. Her brown eyes blinked, then widened with concern.

  “Cole?” Her purse hit the counter and she was running to him. She stopped halfway and her head snapped up and around. “Where’s Sloan?” Her voice had risen an octave with alarm.

  “Gone to the store,” Cole muttered with just a hint of annoyance. “Thanks for caring, by the way.”

  Relief softened the creases between her brows. “Of course I care. Are Beth and Damon okay?” Her gaze washed over the streaks of milk running down the fridge door. “What happened?”

  Cole started to tell her when a small, round face poked out from behind her legs. Willa blinked her big blue eyes at him before coming forward to crawl into his lap.

  “Uncle Cole?”

  Cole pulled her to him, needing to hold someone. “Yeah, baby?”

  “Why are you sad?”

  Cole opened his mouth to respond when he remembered he was still wet from holding Damon and hurriedly nudged the girl back onto her feet.

  “I’m going to change,” he told her. “But then I’ll be back, okay?”

  Willa just stared at him.

  Cole rose and side stepped the puddle and Lily. No one stopped him when he walked into the bedroom and shut the door. In the next room, he could hear Beth’s voice. She wasn’t singing, but it sounded like she was telling Damon a poem, or nursery rhythm. The water wasn’t running any
more, but every so often, water splashed as she bathed the boy.

  Cole dressed quickly and left to find Lily.

  She stood behind Willa as the girl sat on a stool, coloring. Her brown eyes lifted when he walked in.

  “So, what happened?”

  Cole told her everything. By the end of it, Lily was spitting mad.

  “I want to run him over with my car!” she hissed. “Then back up and do it again. I can’t believe he has the gall to think he has any sort of right to that boy after what he’s done. Oh I wish I could get my hands on him!”

  Cole chuckled. “Calmed down, Xena. You’ll hurt yourself.”

  The bathroom door cracked open. Low murmurs as Beth guided Damon into the bedroom filled the apartment. A moment later, Beth appeared in the hallway entrance, eyes bright with tears.

  Cole stiffened. “Beth?”

  She shook her head. “I’m okay.” Yet her voice cracked and her face crumpled. A tear escaped to trace the curve of her cheek. “I just don’t understand how anyone could do that to a baby. There’s nothing to him. He’s a bag of bones wrapped in skin and his whole torso is just … there’s not a spot…”

  Cole went to her, pulled her into his arms.

  “It’s like someone took a boxing glove to him,” she rasped into his collar. “I don’t know how he survived so long with that monster.”

  “He’s not there anymore,” Cole told her. “He’s never going to face that again. I swear it.”

  Beth just rocked her head from side to side while Cole smoothed his palms down the rigid length of her spine. She only seemed to pull herself together when the bedroom door clicked open. She drew herself up with a deep inhale and smiled brightly when Damon shuffled into the room, wearing one of Cole’s t-shirts.

  “Hey, it fits!” she said enthusiastically.

  “Better than it fits me,” Cole agreed.

  The Metallica shirt hung past his knees the way the hospital gown had and slipped off one shoulder. The sleeves alone went nearly to his wrists. He eyed both of them like they were crazy.

  “Mommy?” Willa tugged on her mother’s arm. “I’m hungry.”

  Lily smoothed her daughter’s hair back off her round face. “I’ll get you something in a minute.”

  “I have a box of mystery cereal if you like,” Cole teased, trying to annihilate the sadness that had taken residency in the air.

  Lily snorted. “You would. But speaking of food…” She turned to face him and Beth. “Why don’t you guys come over for supper tonight? You know I always make too much and it’ll be nice to have the whole family there.”

  Cole glanced at Beth, who shrugged.

  Turning, he peered down at Damon. “What do you think? You up for a whole lot of vegetables?”

  Lily smacked him on the arm. “Vegetables are good for you!”

  “God, woman!” He rubbed his arm.

  The front door opened then and Sloan ambled in, several grocery bags and a box in hand.

  “You’re worse than a woman,” Cole remarked. “You go in for one thing and come back with half the store.” He barely dodged the double swats from Beth and Lily. “What is with you women and hitting me?”

  Damon burst out laughing. The sound was such an unexpected thrill of happiness that everyone in the room ceased moving. He wasn’t sure what had made the boy smile, he didn’t care. Cole grinned.

  Uncomfortable, Damon drew the collar of his shirt up around his mouth. But his eyes continued to twinkle.

  Cole went to him, moving at a pace that was just slightly slower than usual and scooped the boy up gently. Damon didn’t stiffen or pull away and Cole took that as a sign as he took him into the kitchen and set him down on the counter with his little legs dangling over the side.

  “Hey, how about a little help here?” Sloan pitched a box of Shake N’ Bake at him that Cole barely caught against his midsection.

  He pushed away from the counter and delved into the bags. There was everything from fruits, to vegetables and meats piled inside. There was so much of everything that Cole was certain he wouldn’t have to go shopping for a month.

  “Are you trying to tell me something?” Cole asked, as he stocked the cupboard with dried goods.

  “Yeah,” Sloan replied simply. “You’ve got a stick of butter and two dried plums in your fridge.”

  Cole squinted at the box his brother was tearing open. “Is that a toaster?”

  “You don’t have one,” Sloan answered.

  “I did have one!” Cole waved an arm towards Beth. “She set it on fire.”

  “Well, now you got another one.”

  There was a moment during breakfast where Cole was certain Damon thought his plate was haunted, because every time he finished, it would mysteriously refill. It was entertaining to watch, especially since Lily and Beth had taken it upon themselves to distract him just long enough for the other one to scrape more eggs and bacon into his plate. After the third, or forth refill, Damon nudged his plate back and simply stared at it with wary eyes.

  In the stool between her mom and dad, Willa chattered on about the fort she and Calla made in the basement the night before. The way she claimed, it was a hundred feet high and could fit a dragon.

  He and Sloan had spent the better part of a month renovating the place for the girls, putting in walls around the stone and insulating the hell out of it to keep out the chill. The carpets were the worst, in Cole’s opinion. Then putting barricades around the boiler and heater to make sure the girls didn’t get hurt. By the end of it, Cole wanted to live down there himself it was so nice. His own daughter said no.

  “It’s our playroom, daddy,” she’d said, and he really never could argue with her.

  “Calla said we’re going to put a moot in when she gets home from school,” Willa finished.

  “A moat, baby,” Sloan corrected. “And I hope it’s an imaginary one, right?”

  Willa blinked blue eyes rapidly. It was her silence that made Cole snicker into his coffee.

  “Don’t laugh,” Sloan warned. “Or you’ll be down there helping me clean it up.”

  Cole was ready with a response when a soft knock sounded and all heads turned in the direction of the door. Cole set down his mug and went to answer it.

  Stacy Barns peered back at him from the other side. Her dark hair was twisted up into one of those fancy knots only women could pull together. Her lipstick was the same shade of purple as the day before, but her suit was a sharp teal that shimmered. In her arms, she carried Damon’s folder.

  “Good morning, Mr. McClain,” she said, when Cole only stared.

  “Ms. Barns.” He quickly stepped aside. “Would you like to come in?”

  Inclining her head, she slipped past him into the apartment.

  She’d been there the day before and he’d given her the tour of the place, assuring her that all the fire alarms worked and, yes, he did have a fire extinguisher under the sink. She had taken a great deal longer in Damon’s room, checking the light fixtures and the sockets until Cole promised the room would be ready by the time Damon was brought home.

  “I went to the hospital,” she said. “Imagine my surprise to learn you had, against the doctor’s advisement, signed Damon out early.”

  “It was a special circumstance,” he explained. “His father—”

  Ms. Barns nodded. “I’ve already spoken to the staff at the hospital as well as the sheriff. I understand your reasoning, but you can’t release a child without the doctor’s consent.”

  “Damon’s fine.” Beth stepped up next to Cole. “We’ve been keeping a very close eye on him and if anything was wrong, we would have taken him right back.”

  “But he needs to be under observation.”

  “The doctor said he only needed a day or two at the hospital,” Beth countered. “When we left the hospital, it was already the next day, which would have made it three days there. The doctor would have released him in a few short hours—”

  “Ms. Doan, you can�
�t just make up rules on your own! We’re talking about Damon’s safety.”

  “Exactly!” Beth said. “And he was not safe there, not after his father found him. We left to protect him.”

  Ms. Barn’s eyes moved past Beth to where Damon sat on a stool, watching the transaction with those big eyes of his. She seemed to spot the other three as well.

  “Hello.”

  Cole, took the opening to change the subject. “This is my brother, Sloan, his wife, Lily, and my niece, Willa.”

  He stepped back as Ms. Barns shook hands with Sloan, then Lily. “You and Mr. McClain also share a daughter, is that correct?”

  Lily nodded. “Calla. She’s at school.”

  “And she’s in Damon’s class?”

  Again, Lily nodded. “Yes.”

  Ms. Barns nodded as well and turned her focus on Damon, who shrank a little in his seat.

  “Hello, Damon.” She gave him a gentle smile. “Do you remember me?”

  Damon shot Cole a quick glance before nodding.

  “How are you today?”

  Again, Damon looked to Cole, as if waiting for permission to answer.

  “It’s all right,” Cole told him.

  He bunched the hem of Cole’s t-shirt around his small fists. “Okay.”

  Ms. Barns eyed his still full plate. “What are you eating?”

  “Eggs,” Damon mumbled. “And bacon and toast.”

  “Mm.” She smiled at him. “That sounds good. Doesn’t it taste good?”

  Damon nodded.

  “Aren’t you hungry?”

  Damon shook his head. “Not anymore.”

  Ms. Barns cocked her head to the side. “Why not?”

  Damon glared at his plate like it couldn’t be trusted. “The plate keeps getting full again.”

  Cole smothered his laugh behind a cough.

  Ms. Barns turned to him. “I was hoping I could get a few minutes to talk to you and Ms. Doan this morning, if you have time to spare.”

  “I was actually going to ask Lily to go clothes shopping with me today,” Beth said. “Damon can’t live in Cole’s clothes forever.”

  Ms. Barns nodded. “Absolutely. Have you decided yet which school he’ll be going to once he feels better?”