Those Same Old Desires (Match Made In Hell Book 2)

by KASI, MV

  Samrat was silent for a while. "Don't be naive Mahi. I didn't want to be crass and mention it to you before, but I did have other sexual partners before my wedding and then much later after Nandini passed away. I was with women who were much more skilled and enthusiastic in bed than you, as you just described. They were beautiful and successful women who were single and lonely like me. And I respected them. After setting the right expectations, we satisfied our mutual needs and parted on friendly terms, when our attraction had worn off," he said.

  She was stunned and a little jealous.

  Samrat continued talking. "We both started our deal with similar expectations too, but I fell in love with you, Mahi. And it's not just because of your skills in bed. I love sharing my life with you, and being with you all the time. You are messy, argumentative, bossy and you keep changing your mind constantly, driving me crazy...but those qualities are overshadowed by the fact that you make me laugh, you tease me, you confide in me and then you listen to me and advise me like you are my best friend. I know you are probably thinking that I'm sounding like a character from a bad romantic movie, but I can now relate to every sappy proposal or declaration of love they show in the movies."

  She burst out crying.

  "I didn't tell you that to make you cry, Mahi. I thought you already knew about how I felt. Well...I know that I'm not the most demonstrative person. Maybe I should try and be like those romantic heroes in movies or books and make elaborate gestures. I'm willing to try it for you, if that brings you back to me."

  She cried harder.

  "Mahi, stop. Please don't cry. You know it makes me sad and helpless for not being there to hug you or to console you."

  She closed her eyes tightly, Samrat's words reminding her of her son's.

  "Mommy, please don't cry. You know it makes me feel sad."

  Her son's words kept repeating in her ear along with the images of losing him. "Sometimes, love alone is not enough Samrat. You deserve better and I hope you find someone worthy to share your life with you. I cannot be that someone."

  "Mahi, I laid out my heart for you and I have begged you to come back to me. I'm going to repeat it again. Please, give us a chance. You don't have to marry me or even have my children. I just want you back," he pleaded.

  "I can't. I'm so sorry Samrat. You deserve better and I'm begging you to move on—"

  "Stop telling me that! You don't get to tell me what I deserve or not deserve, and whether or not I should move on. I love you enough for the both of us, and am willing to put my pride aside, and beg you to come back to me."

  "I can't," she whispered.

  "You can't or you won't?" he demanded, sounding angry.

  "I just can't. I'm sorry."

  She could hear him breathing loudly.

  "I have already told you this before, Mahi. I want you..." he said starkly with a slight quiver to his voice. "I want us to be together, but I can't chase you each time you push me away." And then he took a deep breath. "If you think I'm not worth getting back together, then so be it. Have a great rest of your life!" he said with finality and hung up.

  She knew that she had hurt his pride, by making him beg, and then feel rejected and unwanted. And knowing him, he would never forgive her for that. Unless, she made the effort to seek him out to beg for his forgiveness, and then ask him to take her back. But, she would never do that for his sake. He did deserve someone better.

  It was the final death knell to their relationship.

  She curled up into a ball and cried herself to sleep that night. Just like the past fifteen nights.

  CHAPTER 28

  It was the second weekend of July and Mahi was at her house, working late in the evening. She got back home the previous week, knowing that Samrat would not be at the opposite house. He was travelling to San Francisco for the yearly tech conferences. She had known that because she was supposed to join him there to celebrate their first year anniversary of being together. Two months ago, when they were still together, they had made the reservations at the same vacation house they had taken the previous year.

  "Not that he would be waiting or pining for me at his home even if he was there," she muttered.

  When she got back home, the week before, she had seen a large box in front of the main door. It had all her belongings that were accumulated at his home since the past year.

  Sighing, she decided to skip dinner and crawled into bed.

  She had been fast asleep when she heard her phone ring loudly next to her. When she saw the caller id, she groaned. It was the CIO, Amit. She and Samrat had socialized with his family on a few occasions. Even her latest project that she was currently managing was a high visibility and a high profile one, and Amit took a special interest in it.

  Must have been another crisis at work, she thought tiredly and answered her phone.

  "Mahi..." she heard Amit say in a very weird tone, almost scaring her.

  "Amit, is everything okay? I know we had some issues with the testing, but we resolved most of them early this evening. We are ready to launch—"

  "No. It's not about work, Mahi...It's about Samrat," he said gently and she heard him taking a deep breath.

  Her heart began to thump loudly in her ears.

  "It's not been made public yet, because it would cause a commotion with our shareholders. Mahi...Samrat's flight has been missing since the last six hours. They are not able to make any communication with the jet and they are presuming the worst. But please know that there is no formal confirmation yet. I know that you were together, so I thought you would like to be informed. I'm sorry Mahi," Amit said softly.

  Her mind went blank with shock.

  "Thanks Amit, for letting me know. I-I appreciate it," she said and hung up.

  Her hands were shaking and she began to get chills. She quickly dialed Jhanvi's phone, not bothering to check the time.

  After a lot of rings, Jhanvi answered it with a sleepy, "Hello."

  "Jhanu...Samrat...they are saying that Samrat is missing...that his flight is missing...that they don't know what happened...I don't know what to do...I was so horrible to him...oh my god...I don't know if he's okay...no one knows if he's okay...I really hope he's okay..." she rambled mindlessly.

  "Mahi, are you home?" Jhanvi asked firmly.

  "Yes...but should I go somewhere to find out more. I need more information...I know nothing happened to that flight....I know it will be okay...I know I'll see him again and hold him again..." she said, while the chills got stronger and she was having difficulty to even speak coherently.

  "Mahi, stay where you are. I'll be right there. Okay? Do you understand me?" Jhanvi asked.

  "Yes," she whispered.

  She ran to the top floor towards the prayer room where she hadn't visited even once after moving back to India. She collapsed on her knees inside the small confined room.

  Sweat stuck her palms together and her body trembled violently, while she prayed like she hadn't since her son was on the death bed. Back then, she had believed that somehow god would listen to her pleas and save her son in form of a miracle.

  He hadn't.

  And she lost her son, who was the only person she loved more than her life. And now, Samrat was in a similar crisis and he was also the only person she loved more than her life.

  "Oh god. Please...I know I never pray enough, but please let him be okay. I swear I will do anything he asks. Please, let him be okay..." she began to beg and plead.

  She didn't know how long she was there rocking on her knees and begging god, when she felt Jhanvi next to her.

  "Oh Mahi...let's find out more. Do you have Ananya's phone number? I'm sure she'll know more," said Jhanvi.

  "My phone...I don't know where I left it," said Mahi, still rocking on her knees staring blankly.

  "Ashu, can you go down and get Mahi's cell phone," Jhanvi asked and held Mahi tightly.

  They tried calling Ananya a few times, but her phone was not answered.

  "She's no
t picking up. I don't know if they haven't heard anything or she's ignoring the calls," said Smitha.

  "Try calling Sidhu," suggested Parvathi.

  "Good idea," said Ashwini.

  Mahi was sobbing in Jhanvi's arms saying repeatedly, "I want him back. Oh god, I want him to be okay."

  Sidhu's number was not stored on Mahi's phone. They had to call Jhanvi's husband who called one of their old classmates who was still in touch with Sidhu.

  When they dialed Sidhu's number, he picked up after a few rings. They put him on a speaker and they could hear some background noise that indicated that he was travelling on the road.

  "Sidhu, this is Ashwini from your college. Listen, I'm with Mahi. Do you have more information on Samrat's flight?"

  "Ashwini—" Sidhu began.

  "It's all because of her. She broke my brother's heart and drove him away from home...to go to that place...and now we have lost him!" Ananya began crying and screaming.

  Mahi let out a very loud high pitched keening wail, raising goose bumps on her friends and also on Sidhu who was listening along with Ananya.

  "No! No! Samrat's not gone! Oh god, he's not! I want him back! Get him back to me!" Mahi began to shout and cry hysterically.

  Her friends tried to console her, but she couldn't listen to them. The fact that Samrat was no more was too much to bear.

  After a few frantic moments, they heard Sidhu. "Mahi, we don't have any news yet. Anu, please...you need to be brave for your mother's sake. Don't assume things before we have any confirmation."

  Jhanvi shook Mahi a little until she made eye contact. "We don't know if Samrat is okay or not, Mahi. He might be fine. Okay?" she told Mahi slowly.

  Mahi stopped her wailing, but was still trembling.

  "Sidhu, please keep us informed. I know your priorities are different, but please update us with text messages at least," said Ashwini.

  "Okay, I will. We are going to Anu's parents' village. Her mother heard the news and has collapsed with shock. I'll keep you informed when we hear back," Sidhu told them and hung up the call.

  After an hour of crying and then alternately pleading and then shouting angrily at god, Mahi was made to take some medications that would calm her down and sleep for some time.

  After a few hours, Sidhu called to let them know that the flight had crash landed in a remote forest and that everyone was mostly okay with only minor injuries. And the other good news was that Samrat wasn't on the flight to begin with. He had taken a commercial flight a few hours earlier and would be arriving in India the next day.

  When Mahi heard the news, she broke down in sobs—this time in sheer gratitude.

  After she calmed down, she finally noticed that it was seven thirty in the morning. All her friends were in their night clothes with bleary red eyes and sleep deprived faces. Their faces were also slightly puffed up because they had cried along with her, and listened to her hysterical wails about how cruel and unreasonable she had been with Samrat by not wanting to marry him or have his child.

  "Okay, I'm starving. I skipped dinner last night. Does anyone want any breakfast and tea or coffee?" Mahi croaked out. She had almost completely lost her voice due to the shouting last night and her eyes were almost swollen shut.

  "I'll make the tea," offered Parvathi.

  "I haven't been stocking up groceries or food these days. I think I have some upma rava though," said Mahi.

  "Upma is fine. I'll make it. You take some rest. You have lost a ton of weight in the past four weeks, and not in a healthy manner," scolded Ashwini.

  Mahi sighed. "Yeah. I was busy at work and I was too tired to pick up food or even order it home. I just grabbed some meals at work."

  After a while when they sat around her dining table having breakfast and tea, Jhanvi asked Mahi on what she was planning to do with Samrat.

  "I know that I will beg him to take me back and marry me. I will even h-have his baby whenever he wants to. All I want to do...is to be with him on any terms," said Mahi.

  "I'm sure he feels the same way, Mahi," said Parvathi.

  Mahi smiled sadly. "No. I know him very well. He will growl and push me away at first. I hurt his pride and made him beg, only to reject him. I told him that our love didn't amount to anything."

  "Samrat is a practical person, he will understand your fears, when you tell him why you acted that way," said Smitha.

  "I really hope so. It's going to be so hard waiting for him to come back to the house across mine," said Mahi.

  Sidhu had regretfully pleaded with Mahi, asking her to not come down to Samrat's parents' village. Ananya and her mother were still shaken up and Sidhu wanted Samrat to spend some time with them exclusively without Mahi interrupting them.

  Mahi had agreed with Sidhu, even though she was anxious to see Samrat as soon as possible.

  After breakfast, Mahi insisted that her friends get back to their families.

  "Are you sure Mahi? I can wait until Rajeev gets here at ten o'clock," said Jhanvi.

  "No Jhanu, I kept you guys with me for long enough on a Sunday morning. I'm sure you have plans with your families. And I do need an hour to shower and look a little decent before Rajeev gets here to pick me up. I promised Kamala aunty I would spend the day with her," said Mahi.

  They helped Mahi clear up the table and prepared to leave. She hugged and thanked them again.

  "Thanks guys, I love you all. I don't know what I would have done without you all here with me last night."

  "Don't be silly Mahi, that's what friends are for. You would have done the same for any of us," said Jhanvi.

  Mahi smiled and waved them goodbye, before going inside to get ready and wait for Rajeev.

  CHAPTER 29

  Mahi ran her fingers on Samrat's picture on her wall.

  "Come back soon, Samrat," she muttered, missing him like crazy.

  It has been two weeks since the missing flight episode and she was getting a little frantic. Samrat was not answering her calls and wasn't back to his parents' house in the city. And when she called Sidhu, he told her that Samrat was still at the village. And also that Samrat asked Sidhu to convey the message that he didn't want to see or talk to her.

  She knew that she had to give Samrat some space and probably wait until he was ready enough to talk to her. And to distract herself, she had been clocking in nearly fourteen hours a day at work and came home to simply crash on her bed.

  On one of the nights, she received a very surprising call from her former mother-in-law. The call left her both disturbed while also happy.

  "Mahi, my son has been arrested and is released on bail. My daughter-in-law has a restraining order against him along with some other charges for which he might be implicated soon," her former mother-in-law said frantically.

  "I'm sorry that you are worried. But how can I help?"

  "My son said that it was some man you know who set him up by speaking to my daughter-in-law. She has some incriminating evidence against my son that can put him in jail for domestic violence. Please help me Mahi. Ask that man to speak with her," her former mother-in-law begged.

  Mahi knew it was Samrat, who must have done something and felt her love for him increase tenfold. "I'm sorry. There is nothing I can do. And if Dinesh's wife has some concrete proof of abusing her and hurting her, then she must have suffered a lot to go to those lengths," she said softly before hanging up.

  She wanted to hold Samrat badly. She wished she could storm to his hiding spot, and cling to his leg, and then refuse to let go. But she didn't know where his village was located.

  Sighing, she realized that she didn't have anything planned for the day. She wanted to have a heavy brunch and probably catch up on some sleep. Just as she sat down to eat her vegetable pongal, the doorbell rang.

  When she answered the door, she was shocked seeing Ananya.

  "Did I catch you at a bad time? Can I come in?" asked Ananya.

  Shaking her head, Mahi stepped aside hurriedly. "Yes. No. I mean...y
es come on in and no, I'm not busy."

  Ananya walked inside and looked around. She saw the pictures on the walls, some single framed pictures of Aryan, some huge collaged pictures of Mahi with her friends, family and even some with Samrat. "Your son?" she asked. "My brother mentioned him to me."

  Mahi nodded. "Yes. That's Aryan. He passed away nearly two years ago. That's why I moved here," she said quietly.

  Ananya watched her and said, "I heard that from my brother. I'm sorry to hear that."

  "Thank You. Look Ananya—"

  "Something smells nice in here," said Ananya, walking towards the dining table.

  Mahi followed behind her. "I made some pongal. Please have some," she offered and got an extra plate from the kitchen.

  Ananya sat down and took a few bites before saying, "Hmm not bad, it just needs a little more pepper and a lot more ghee."

  Mahi smiled at the 'not bad' comment that was so similar to Samrat's.

  Ananya sighed. "Alright Mahi, I have to be frank with you. I don't think you are the right person for my brother. You know that he was married before, and his wife, my sister-in-law, was an amazing person. She was beautiful and had the most nurturing and caring personality I had ever come across."

  Mahi nodded. "I know. Samrat spoke to me several times about Nandini."

  "Then you must also know that what my brother doesn't need...is a high maintenance dramatic woman who has commitment issues, and would possibly break his heart several times before she is done with him."

  Mahi felt her breath catch in her throat. "I know I'm all that and broke his heart, but—"

  "I had my friend Preethi picked out as my future sister-in-law. Preethi is sweet and caring, while also being a modern woman who juggles a career along with raising her son as a single mother. She does a great job at everything."