Wild Irish

by C. M. Seabrook

  The man’s voice is a mix of anger and panic. Cillian must hear it, too, because his brows draw down and he moves towards the door with urgency.

  When the door swings opens, Aiden stands there, dark circles under his eyes, hair standing on end. He glances between us, and even I know that whatever he has to say is bad.

  “Thank God, I finally found ye. Jaysus, why have ye had yer phone off for the last two days?” Aiden’s words come out in a tumble, and I see now that it’s more fear than anger that spurs him on.

  “What are ye doing here?” Cillian tries his best to keep his voice steady, but I hear the quiver. “Is it Emer?”

  Aiden shakes his head. “Ye need to come home. It’s Owen. He’s–”

  “You already know my answer. If he’s gotten himself into trouble–”

  “He’s in the hospital. They don’t…” Aiden’s eyes squeeze shut and he pinches the bridge of his nose. “They’re not sure if he’s going to make it.”

  With that statement, every ounce of anger I felt moments before drains from me, and all I want to do is wrap my arms around Cillian, whose face has drained of color. For the first time since I met him, I see real fear in his eyes.

  I want to comfort him, but when I step towards him, I see the barricade he’s already constructed. And I know I’ve lost him for good.

  It’s over.

  I just pray he doesn’t lose his brother, too.

  Chapter 22

  Cillian

  I can’t think, can’t breathe.

  Owen.

  There’s no fucking way that bastard is going to die on me. Not when we’ve been at odds. I may hate him for what he did, but he’s still my brother.

  “What happened?” I rough my palms over my face and listen to Aiden tell the story.

  “He was in a fight. Took a bad punch. By the time Shane and I saw what was happening, it was too late. They took him by ambulance, but…he hasn’t woken up.”

  “A fight?” It’s the only thing I hear. One thing Owen isn’t is a brawler. Sure, we’d given each other a few beatings over the years, but he’d never been the one to start it. That was always my job.

  I sit down on the edge of the bed and place my face in my hands. “Where is he?”

  “Midland Regional,” Aiden says.

  Shit. That’s almost a two-hour drive.

  “Okay.” My head is spinning. “Let’s go. My car is parked–”

  “You shouldn’t drive.” Delaney puts her hand on my arm, but I flinch and pull back.

  “I’ll be fine.” I don’t look at her. I can’t look at her.

  Aiden frowns, looking between us. “Delaney’s right. I can take you. We can come back for yer car–”

  “No.”

  “Cillian.” The agony in Delaney’s voice makes me pause, but I don’t have the strength to deal with her right now.

  Keeping my gaze averted, I stand and pull out my keys, removing the spare house key, then hold it out to her. “Get yer stuff. I want it gone by the time I get home.”

  She sucks in a shaky breath. “I don’t want it to end like this. I know you’re upset, but if you’ll just–”

  “Take it,” I yell when she doesn’t move.

  “Cillian.” Aiden’s voice is a warning. He takes a step towards me, placing himself between Delaney and I like he needs to fucking protect her. “Are ye really that set on pushing everyone away?”

  “Ye’ll defend anyone but me, won’t ye?” I glare at him, then toss the key on the bed.

  Aiden just shakes his head at me, then looks away.

  When I start for the door, I think that Delaney might try to stop me. Hell, part of me wants her to. Wants her to fight. To tell me that the man was lying about being her fiancé. And I might just believe her.

  I want to believe her.

  But she doesn’t.

  When I glance at her from the doorway, for the first time since I met her, I can’t read what’s behind those hazel eyes. But her final words are clear. “Goodbye, Cillian.”

  I grunt and slam the door behind me, knowing I just lost the best damn thing that’s ever happened to me.

  Chapter 23

  Delaney

  As soon as Cillian is gone, I break down. Sitting on the bed, I let the tears I’d been holding back stream down my cheeks.

  “Ye want to tell me what that was about?” Aiden crosses his arms, watching me with a frown.

  I pick up the key, trying to hold back the sobs that strangle me. I shouldn’t care as much as I do. I knew all along that this wouldn’t last. But the way he looked at me, like I was filth, has burned into my mind.

  “Delaney?” There’s sympathy in his eyes when I glance up and meet his gaze.

  “I need to go.” I still need to deal with Matt. I’m not sure why he’s here, or why he told Cillian that we’re engaged. But I intend to find out.

  “I’ll drive you. If ye need to stay with Emer and I until ye figure things out–”

  “I’d appreciate a ride to the train station, but I need to deal with something first. Would you mind waiting?”

  He nods.

  I gather the few belongings I have, then make my way down to the coffee shop. I can feel Aiden behind me, but he has the grace to not say anything or ask any more questions.

  As soon as I see Matt, fresh anger mixes with misery, a volatile combination, and I can feel myself on the edge, ready to explode.

  His familiar brown eyes widen when he sees me. “God, Delaney. I’ve been worried–”

  “Don’t.” I raise my hand, stopping him from coming any closer.

  He frowns, jaw clenching, nostrils flaring. “Why are you here? How are you here?”

  “Your parents called me. They’re worried about you.”

  Shit. I’d sent them a few emails, but I hadn’t contacted them in over two weeks. Not that they’d ever seemed to notice when I’d gone long periods without calling before.

  “Joint MasterCard. I saw the charges.”

  Shit. I hadn’t thought about that.

  “I went to your apartment. I could tell you hadn’t been there in a while, so I called your work. They said you’d been…let go.”

  “Did you tell my parents?”

  “No.”

  “Thank you.” The words feel like grit in my mouth.

  His features relax slightly and he nods. “When I realized you hadn’t told them about us, I thought maybe there was still hope.”

  “Hope?” I laugh. “I didn’t think telling them you’re a lying, two-timing cheat would be helpful.”

  His nostrils flare. “I didn’t lie to you, Delaney. I told you exactly what happened.”

  “That you slept with another woman while we were engaged. Yeah, thank you for being so honest.” Sarcasm drips from my words. “You’re a modern day saint.”

  “Jesus, Delaney. How many times do I have to apologize? It only happened once. And it wasn’t like…” He rubs the back of his neck and looks away.

  “Wasn’t like what? Say it.”

  “You were so caught up in your grief, you didn’t have time for me.”

  “If you were so unhappy, you should have broken up with me, not gone out a screwed the first woman you met.”

  “Abby wasn’t…” He shakes his head and looks up at the ceiling, blowing out a slow, calming breath. When he looks back at me, his expression has changed, more contained. And I’m reminded of the man I used to care about. The one that stuck by me through Maeve’s illness, who held my hand at her funeral. “I love you, Delaney. That hasn’t changed.”

  For a moment, I feel a hint of the emotion that I once felt with him. And I realize now how dull and passionless it really was.

  “It’s over between us.” I keep my voice steady.

  “Why, because of that guy you’re with? Where is he now?” A small, satisfied grin tugs at his lips, like he knows what he did, or maybe he did it on purpose. “You think someone like that wants more than just sex from you? I saw the asshole driving
off a few minutes ago.”

  “Because of you. Because you lied and told him we were engaged.”

  “Is it really a lie, Delaney? You still love me. I get that you needed some space, to work out whatever shit was going on in your head–”

  “Is that really what you think?” I’m yelling now, and people are staring, including Aiden. “I gave you your ring back. Told you I didn’t want to see you again. I meant it.”

  “You’re not thinking straight. You don’t know what you want. Come home and–”

  “I know what I want.” I breathe in through my nose and out through my mouth, fighting off tears. Because what I want is gone. “It’s not you.”

  “Think about what this looks like. You jump on a plane to Ireland without telling anyone, then screw the first guy you meet. What do you think your parents will say when I tell them?”

  I want to slap him. Hit him. Punch him. Make him hurt the way I am. And it’s not just his betrayal. It’s that he ruined things with Cillian. For that, I’ll never forgive him.

  He takes a step toward me and growls out, “I saw the pictures. The video of you throwing yourself at that guy. They’re all over the internet. When I showed your picture to a few of the locals, they were more than happy to share them with me.”

  My mouth opens and closes. He must be talking about the night we were at the Crow’s Head.

  “One little click, and I’ll send them to everyone who knows us. Do you really want that?”

  “You think threatening me will make me want you? Send them to whoever the hell you want. I really don’t care.”

  Matt grabs my arm tight when I start to walk away.

  “Delaney?” Aiden is behind me, and I can hear the threat in his voice, a threat directed at Matt.

  “I’m all right.”

  “Who the hell are you?” Matt glares at Aiden, then turns back to me. “What? Are you fucking him, too?”

  Aiden takes a step forward, but I place my hand on his arm, and shake my head.

  “You need to leave,” I say, pulling out of Matt’s grip. I straighten my shoulders and harden my gaze on him. I won’t give him the satisfaction of seeing my tears. Because they’re not for him.

  “Delaney. I’m sorry.” Matt drags his fingers through his hair and breathes out sharply. “I didn’t come here to fight. I came here to bring you home. We can make things work. We’ve both made mistakes.” His tone is levelled and controlled like he’s talking to a child. I didn’t realize until right now how manipulative he is. “Come home, Delaney. Everyone’s worried about you.”

  “I am going home. But not with you.” I turn on my heels, ignoring Matt’s angry demands behind me as I leave the coffee shop.

  He doesn’t follow, and I assume that has something to do with Aiden, but I don’t turn around to find out.

  Blinking back tears, my mind dull and my chest empty, I walk. I don’t know for how long or how far I go, but I don’t stop until I’m at the ocean’s edge, the waves lapping up over my shoes, and filling my toes with sand.

  “Ye all right?” Aiden’s voice carries over the wind as he approaches behind me.

  “I lost him.”

  Aiden blows out a long breath. I know I don’t have to tell him I mean Cillian. He knows.

  “The man’s not thinking straight. He never does when he’s angry. Come back with me. Once ye explain–”

  “You and I both know he’ll never forgive me. It doesn’t matter if I did anything wrong or not. Once he has something in his head, there’s no changing his mind.”

  “Ye’re right. He’s stubborn.” Aiden nods, placing a hand on my shoulder. “But he cares about ye.”

  “Thank you for saying that, but you’re wrong.”

  “I’m wrong about a lot of things, but this isn’t one of them.”

  I sigh and shake my head. “You should be going back. He’ll need you if anything happens to his brother. I know he acts like he doesn’t need anyone, but it’s just a show. He misses you.”

  Aiden smiles sadly. “Ye’re in love with him.”

  “Maybe. I don’t know. I’m…I was happy when I was with him. But maybe that’s because I knew our time together was short. That I had to enjoy every minute.”

  We stand in silence staring out at the ocean.

  “What’re ye going to do?” Aiden finally asks.

  “I need to get things straightened out with the car, then I guess I’ll go home.”

  Aiden frowns. “He didn’t tell ye?”

  “What?”

  “Cillian took care of everything. He paid Tommy last week. Ye don’t owe anything.”

  My chest squeezes. “Why would he do that?”

  “Like I said, he cares about ye. Come back with me. I’ll talk to him.”

  I shake my head. “He already thinks you’re against him. He won’t believe you. Even if he does, I still have to go home. I can’t stay in Ireland forever.”

  Aiden exhales heavily and rubs the back of his neck. “I’ll drive ye back to Cillian’s. Maybe ye’ll change yer mind.”

  “No. There’s a train station in Sligo. If you can drop me off there, I’ll take it to Dublin.”

  “What about yer things?”

  “I have everything I need with me.”

  “Ye know Emer is going to kill me if I let ye leave without saying goodbye.”

  A smile tugs at the corners of my lips despite the ache in my chest. “Give her a hug and tell her thank you for everything. I’ll never forget either of you.”

  He sighs. “Ye’re sure ye want to leave?”

  “Want to?” I shake my head. “No. But I did what I came here to do.”

  He gives me a puzzled look. “What’s that?”

  I glance out at the ocean, and despite how much my heart is breaking, I know I found what Maeve wanted me to find.

  “Found my happiness.”

  Cillian helped me do that. It’ll be hard without him, but I know I’ll manage on my own. I have to.

  I reach into my pocket and pull out the torn piece of paper. The last of Maeve’s list. “Will you give him this?”

  Aiden takes the note and mumbles the words, “Find Your Happiness.”

  With a heaviness, I sigh. “Tell him I hope he finds it.”

  Aiden wraps an arm around my shoulders and kisses the top of my head. “Ye’re a good woman, Delaney. Cillian knows that. Don’t give up on him just yet.”

  A small flutter of hope stirs in my chest, but it’s not something I want to hold onto. Doing so would be too painful. If I’ve learned anything since I’ve been here, it’s that I’ll only be happy when I let go of the things I can’t have.

  Chapter 24

  Cillian

  Emer and Shane stand up when I walk into the hospital room, but I barely see them. The only thing I can focus on is my brother’s hulking frame in the small bed, wires and tubes everywhere.

  All the air rushes out of my lungs, and my already mangled heart is shredded.

  I manage to swallow past the lump in my throat, and grit out the words, “How is he?”

  Shane leans against the wall, arms crossed, his body radiating with tension. When I glance over at him, I can see the blame in his eyes, like this is somehow my fault.

  Emer moves towards me and places her hand on my arm. “They have him in a medically-induced coma until the swelling in his brain goes down.”

  “Jaysus.” I rake my hands through my hair, gutted. “What the hell happened? Aiden said he was fighting–”

  “Of course he would sugarcoat it.” Shane sneers, pushing off the wall, all his anger directed at me. “Ye have everyone walking around on bleedin’ eggshells.”

  “Shane,” Emer warns.

  “No. Let him talk. Ye have something to say, say it,” I growl out.

  “Why?” Shane gets in my face. Nostrils flare, lips curl in a sneer, and I can tell he’d have no issue with hitting me right now. “It doesn’t matter what anyone says, ye’ll believe whatever the hell ye want t
o. Even if it means destroying everyone around ye.”

  “Ye’re going to blame me for this, too? Fuck you,” I bite out, taking a step towards him, daring him to hit me. Anything would feel better than the emptiness eating away at my chest.

  He snorts in disgust, then nudges my shoulder with his own as he storms out.

  Emer exhales heavily and shakes her head once her brother is gone. Her gaze is on me, and I see the judgment there.

  “Spit it out.” I sit down in the chair beside the bed and place my face in my palms.

  “What?”

  “Whatever it is ye’re trying not to say.”

  “Ye may just be the most stubborn man I’ve ever met, ye know that?”

  I grunt, leaning on my elbows. “Tell me what happened.”

  She moves to the other side of the bed and places the back of her hand on my brother’s forehead. “Molly.”

  One word, it’s enough to make every muscle in my body tense.

  “What about her?”

  “She came into the pub. Owen had been drinking. A lot.”

  “Owen doesn’t drink.”

  “He does now.”

  I glance up and see the accusation in her eyes. “Don’t blame this on me. If he fought over that bitch, it’s his problem.”

  “He wasn’t fighting over her. He was fighting over ye.”

  I narrow my eyes. “Me?”

  “I know ye won’t believe me, but it’s the truth.”

  “Tell me,” I say through clenched teeth.

  “He was arguing with her, trying to convince her to tell ye the truth.”

  My chest tightens painfully with a sense of foreboding.

  “I was there. I heard what she said. Admitted flat out that she’d snuck into his bed. Planned the whole thing. She wanted ye to find her with him.”

  “Why would she do that?” It doesn’t make any sense.

  “She was trying to get back at ye. Thought ye’d been fooling around yerself.”

  “I didn’t. I’d never.”

  Emer shrugs. “Ye don’t argue with crazy. People will think what they want to think no matter how hard ye try to reason with them.”