A Brother's Honor

by Brenda Jackson

  She swallowed deeply. “Then it’s best that I leave and you find another company to—”

  “No, that’s not the best. I think it’s time we act like two adults and deal with it.”

  She lifted her chin. “Deal with it?”

  “Yes, deal with it.”

  “And just how are we supposed to do that?”

  Jace rubbed his hand down his face. He didn’t have a clue. All he knew at that moment was that he wanted her again. It wouldn’t bother him if they left here and went to her place. He’d had her, gotten a taste of what it was like and there was no way in hell he wouldn’t want more. He never considered himself a greedy ass, but he did so now.

  “We have this weekend to think about it,” he said, reaching down to pick up his jacket off the floor.

  “There’s nothing to think about,” she said. “I’m ending my contract with your company.”

  He eased his jacket over his shoulders. “You can’t do that,” he said, trying to keep the frustration out of his voice.

  “And why can’t I?”

  “Because I need you.”

  Shana inhaled a deep breath. She would have had a defense had he said anything but that. Especially when it was spoken with such sincerity that it jabbed at her heart. She’d covered practically all of his company reports, and he was right. He did need her. At least he needed her services. She was convinced that someone was maliciously trying to destroy his company. She wasn’t sure who and didn’t have a clue as to why. And whoever it was seemed determined to do it at a slow pace so as not to be detected.

  Balling up her ripped panty hose and shoving them into her purse, she looked up at him. “I need to think about things over the weekend. I’ll let you know my answer by Monday.”

  Thankful that everyone had left for the day so no one could be a witness to her tousled state, she slid into her jacket. Without saying anything else, she quickly left.

  * * *

  Hours later, just moments after taking a shower and with the towel still wrapped around his waist, Jace stood at his bedroom window and looked broodingly out at the lake. His blood soared through his veins with the memories of what had happened between him and Shana earlier.

  Even now, he had to fight his own battle of restraint and control the temptation to call her. Not to apologize for what had taken place, since he could never regret that, but for the lack of finesse with which it was done. But then he thought, with full acceptance, their intimate encounter was meant to be that way. Hot. Fiery. Spontaneous. And filled with the passionate greed of two people who’d reached their limits.

  Four weeks of pent-up sexual frustration, an attraction they’d tried to ignore and sexual chemistry that was stirred every time they were within a few feet of each other had driven them to what had happened tonight. It had been inevitable, sooner or later. There was only so much control a person could have, and tonight they’d proven strong, heated desire couldn’t be capped.

  And the passionate fire that had raged through their bodies may have cost them.

  He drew in a deep breath as he slowly nursed the beer he held in his hand. Contrary to what Shana believed, they could not go back to how things used to be. That’s why things had gotten out of hand tonight in the first place. He could understand her policy of never getting involved with a client, and in some ways respected her for it. But this was one time she needed to rethink changing that rule. Now that it had been broken, they needed to act like adults and deal with it. And they could. All they needed was a plan of action, but she wasn’t willing to do that. Her strategy was to pretend nothing ever happened and go back to the status quo.

  What she failed to realize, or maybe she just didn’t understand, was that making love to her tonight the way he had was an act of raw possession, a claiming of the most intimate kind. In other words, primal sexuality within him that had lain dormant since his divorce three years ago had awakened and now had a life of its own. It’s not that he hadn’t made love to a woman since then, because he had. But he could honestly say that making love with any other woman hadn’t had the same effect. Never had a deep, intense desire for a female overridden anything else—self-control, common sense or his ability to put things in perspective and think logically.

  Right now, the only thought that consumed his mind was that his body still craved hers.

  Rubbing a frustrated hand down his face, he moved from the window. The house was quiet, and he would be the first to admit he missed the sound of Caden and his saxophone, which his brother would play at all hours of the night. It had never been a disturbing sound to him, even while they were growing up. He’d always felt and known that Caden’s music was a way of calming his soul. His brother needed the music.

  Just like he felt a need for Shana.

  While inside of her, he had felt the passion radiating from her soft core. A core he wanted to explore again and again. He knew this weekend and whatever decision she made would be the turning point in how they would handle things. But like he’d told her, he couldn’t make a promise he knew he wouldn’t be capable of keeping.

  Although he knew he should give her space to decide the outcome of their fate, he was fearful of doing that, knowing she would probably make the wrong decision. He needed to talk to her, find out why she was determined not to let anything develop between them. To hell with her policy.

  And as he headed back toward the bathroom, he knew he had his own decisions to make.

  * * *

  The moment Caden walked out on stage in front of a packed house at Columbia University’s huge auditorium, he felt her. She was there, somewhere in the audience. For a moment, he almost stumbled as he fought the anger and irritation that began escalating through his body.

  Why was she here? He had been home in Virginia for over three weeks, and their paths had crossed more than once. They hadn’t had much to say to each other then, so why was she here? Refusing to let the unanswered question get to him, he stepped into place and within minutes had begun playing his sax.

  The music flowed from within him, and he closed his eyes as he felt the melody pour through his body and ease some of his tension. He exulted in his music’s ability to calm him, to place him at that moment on a higher plane and for a moment to suppress his irritation under a haze of indifference. That’s what he needed to get through tonight.

  He flowed into the evening, belting out one number after the next, and it was only when he was about to do his last number that he saw her. How he managed to do that in a packed house of several thousand people he wasn’t sure. All he knew was their gazes connected the moment he lifted the sax to his lips. He couldn’t close his eyes again the way he normally did while performing. Instead he kept his gaze locked on hers as he played. He put everything he had into it, and the band behind him followed his lead.

  At the end, he got a standing ovation, and he wondered if she would be coming to the private party later given for the performers. Typically, it was invitation-only, but that hadn’t stopped her before, he thought, remembering that last time a few years ago.

  He finally broke eye contact with her when everyone bowed for their last time. When he glanced back up at the spot where Shiloh had been sitting just moments ago, he saw she was gone.

  Chapter Eighteen

  One twenty-three North Pinewood Drive.

  There was no doubt in Ben Bradford’s mind that he was at the right house. Mona had said it was a white stucco single-story patio home that sat at the end of a brick road on a spacious lot. It was a nice house with gardens of flowering marigolds and zinnias adorning the windows. She had a perfectly manicured lawn with lush green grass that sloped into a small pond.

  She’d mentioned that most of her neighbors were other professors who worked at the university. He couldn’t imagine having your coworkers as your neighbors. He liked the guys who’d been on the force with him while living in Boston, but he hadn’t wanted to look at their faces from sunup to sundown. When he left the precinct
and went home, his main focus had been on his daughters. Ben’s girls.

  Like he’d told Shana the other day, he was proud of them. They were strong, college-educated, hardworking women who’d made some good decisions in their lives. Granted, neither was close to settling down and giving him the grandkids he looked forward to spoiling one day, but he was satisfied that in due time they would both meet a couple of nice guys.

  Every once in a while, he wondered whether they were too strong-willed and independent. But then he knew he wouldn’t change them even if he could and was convinced there were men out there just as strong who would complement his daughters perfectly.

  Bringing the car to a stop in the circular driveway, he opened the door and got out. Glancing around, he could see in the distance a part of the university, the Rotunda. He drew in a deep breath, remembering how he had spent four years of his life there. He had fallen in love with a beautiful young woman named Sharon Sweet there.

  He’d also played football, had been a valiant Cavalier with dreams of going pro. But a knee injury had ended those dreams. Still, his college days had been good ones, and he’d had fun. Those times had been good and he cherished the memories.

  Now here he was, forty-some years later and falling in love all over again. And he was convinced he was falling in love. When it came to choosing the women to share his life with, he didn’t make things complicated. He was blessed with an inner sense of knowing just who was meant for him. He had known when he’d met Sharon, and he’d known when he met Mona. Now he had to convince Mona that their futures were entwined. This pizza date was a start.

  He was well aware that she was leery of a serious involvement after what her husband had done to her, and then there was the issue of her blindness. To him, it wasn’t an issue. Since knowing her, he had a newfound respect for someone with a disability who was making the best of it. And she was. He’d watched how she got around the grocery store without help. Mona was a beautiful woman, a confident woman, a woman who had captured the eye and the heart of Ben Bradford. Unknowingly and without intent, she had done her job, and now it was time to do his. Operation Mona Underwood was now underway.

  His heart didn’t miss a beat as he headed for her front door.

  * * *

  Gloria McCabe stared across the table at Shana as they both sipped on their glasses of wine. They had taken in a movie and had returned to Shana’s home. She studied her friend and wondered at her mood. “Is there a reason you’re down in the dumps tonight, Shana? I was telling you about the couple I caught on the plane locked in the bathroom, determined to join the Mile High Club. I didn’t get a reaction from you about it,” she said.

  Shana glanced up and met Gloria’s inquiring gaze. She hadn’t been able to comment about a couple who hadn’t been able to control their urges over thirty thousand feet in the air, because she had been caught in a similar situation herself recently right here on terra firma. She wondered what her friend would say if she knew that Shana had been taken on her desk last night, and had loved every moment.

  “Shana?”

  Shana sighed. “Sorry, I guess I’m not very talkative tonight.”

  Gloria laughed as she fluffed out her blond hair around her shoulders. “What’s wrong with you? You’ve been quiet all evening. What gives?”

  Shana broke eye contact with Gloria and stared into her glass of wine. She and Gloria had shared a lot, and Shana considered her a BFF. They had become friends before becoming neighbors. When Shana’s father had moved here, Gloria had been the attendant on the flights Shana would take twice a month from Boston to visit her father and sister.

  It was Gloria who’d jokingly suggested that maybe Shana should save her money and just move to Virginia. Less than a year later, Shana had done just that. And it had been Gloria who’d told her about the condo that was for sale right next door to hers.

  A friendship had been born, and since then, it had been nourished into the trusting relationship it was now. She knew all about Gloria’s abusive ex-husband and her current affair with a pilot, although the airline she worked for had a no-fraternizing policy.

  She glanced back at Gloria and smiled. “I’m fine. I just have a lot to think about, and it would help if I asked you a few questions.”

  Gloria raised a brow. “What about?”

  “You and Eric.”

  Gloria leaned back in her chair. “What about us?”

  Shana took a sip of her wine. “What made you decide to break the rules and get involved when you know what the outcome will be if you’re discovered?”

  Gloria didn’t say anything for a moment and then said, “I wanted to be with him—both physically and mentally. Things started out on a physical level. We were two divorcés who wanted to get wild, butt-naked and stay independent. But then we discovered we liked each other beyond the sex, and two years later it’s still beyond the sex...although the sex is still off the charts, mind you.”

  Shana smiled, figuring it was. She’d seen Eric sneak in and out of Gloria’s house many times. “Doesn’t the sneaking around bother you?”

  A smile slowly faded from Gloria’s face. “Sometimes it does, but then I remember I have more than most women right now. I have a man in my life I admire, a man who wants me as much as I want him, a man who understands there are times I don’t want to be crowded, but then knows there are going to be times when I don’t want to get out of bed as long as he’ll stay in it with me.”

  Shana took a sip of her wine. “Sounds like a woman in love.”

  Gloria shrugged. “I prefer thinking of myself as a woman who knows what she wants and is gutsy enough to go after it.” She paused and then asked, “Is there a reason why you’re interested in our hot and heavy affair?”

  Shana smiled. The subtle lifting of her friend’s eyebrow conveyed that she expected an answer. “What if I told you I was recently in the position?”

  “You’re having an affair?” Gloria asked, leaning forward as if it was paramount not to miss one word of Shana’s answer.

  “No, but I did do something with a male client that I should not have. You know my rules.”

  Gloria smiled. “You mean you actually slept with him?”

  “I wouldn’t say we slept, but the gist of your question still leans toward an answer of yes.”

  “Damn,” Gloria said, slumping back against her chair. “And you are such a stickler for your rules.”

  “I guess I have to blame it on the hormones and the fact he’s so damn gorgeous. I was attracted to him from the first. I tried to ignore it but couldn’t.”

  Gloria frowned. “Why place the blame on anything? You’re a grown-ass woman who can do what you want to do. You made the rules, and you can certainly break them. That’s not how it is with Eric and me. We didn’t make any rules.”

  Shana began nibbling on her bottom lip. “But I shouldn’t break them. He’s a client, for heaven’s sake. If things don’t work out, it can be messy.”

  “Says who? It’s not like you’re going to be working for him forever. How much longer will he be a client?”

  Shana shrugged. “I don’t know. Probably no more than another month or so.”

  Gloria slapped a palm to her thigh. “There you have it. Unless you get too attached, the affair will end in a month. But just think of what you’ll be getting until then. Unless after making out with him, you’ve decided he’s not worth it.”

  Shana didn’t say anything for a minute and then, “Oh, he was worth it, and I don’t regret what we did. But I told him it couldn’t happen again and asked that he promise that it wouldn’t.”

  “Did he?”

  “Said he couldn’t do that.”

  Gloria smiled. “Good for him. Some things you can’t always control, Shana. A strong sexual attraction is one of them.”

  Shana stood and began pacing. “But that’s just it. I don’t want to be attracted to him, sexually or otherwise. But I know I will as long as I work for him. I told him if he couldn’t
promise, I would have to end our business relationship.”

  “You’d go that far?”

  Shana drew in a deep breath. “I don’t have a choice.”

  “Yes, you do. If you want to be with him, Shana, you have a choice.”

  Shana shook her head. “That’s just it. I don’t know what I want. I wanted him yesterday, but I want to think it was hormones working overtime and nothing more.”

  “And what if it’s more?”

  Shana stopped her pacing. “It’s not more. I told you about Jonathan.”

  “Yes, but not all men are the same. I found that out, and maybe with this guy you’ll find that out, as well.”

  Shana came back to her chair and sat down. “I have to make a decision by Monday.”

  Gloria nodded. “Good luck, but can I give you some advice?”

  “Yes.”

  “I know you. You like having total control of your life and everything in it. But every once in a while, it’s okay to let go, lose control and forgo the norm.”

  Shana drew in a deep breath. “There will be a price to pay.”

  A smile tipped the corners of Gloria’s mouth. “Maybe. Maybe not. But only you can determine if that price, if there is one, is worth it.”

  * * *

  Mona’s heart was racing overtime as she glanced over to where Ben was sitting. She couldn’t see him—at least not clearly—but she felt him. His very presence was radiating emotions through her.

  Her talking watch had announced the time just seconds before he’d rung the doorbell earlier that evening. Using what she had come to know as her “magic wand,” she had slowly walked to the door. After verifying it was him, she had opened the door and allowed him into her world.

  “Did you enjoy the pizza tonight, Mona?”

  An easy smile spread across her lips. “Yes, thank you. I thought your daughter would be joining us tonight.”

  He chuckled. “She was invited but she made other plans. She’ll be sorry she missed this.” He had been glad Shana hadn’t come, since he’d wanted Mona to himself tonight. When she had opened the door, he had stood there and looked at her up and down, appreciating what he saw. She was wearing a beautiful printed sundress with a pair of cute sandals. Her hair was curly and crowned her face.