Primal Desire: a BBW Bear Shifter Paranormal Romance (Shadowlands Bear Shifters Book 5)

by Olivia Harp

  His skin rose up with goose bumps, his stomach felt hollow.

  Mate. His bear grumbled again.

  And right then he knew the damn beast was right all along. Now everything was at stake. His whole life, the way he helped kids, even worse: Audrey. They agreed on keeping everything physical.

  He fucked that up.

  CHAPTER 26

  The sunset was magnificent. The orange tinged horizon mixed with the purple-blue sky up above, some stars began to appear in the darkening vault of the heavens. No moon hung on the firmament, so luckily, they'd be able to enjoy seeing the Milky Way. This was going to be a great evening.

  A warm breeze coming out of the bonfire grazed Audrey's skin. Enzo was still working on it, the fire not yet at its fullest, but she knew it would be worth it.

  He had some students help him build a pyre, with four big sticks acting like posts. They put dry leaves and sticks in it, he said it would help the fire reach higher.

  Before long, a big fire lit the side of the camp. Audrey smiled. This was some real ranger stuff she had never seen. Or maybe boy scout? She smiled, either way it was awesome.

  Everyone gathered around the fire, some students opened their bags of marshmallows and put them on a stick.

  Enzo gave her one, she nodded her thanks and approached the fire.

  "You all right?" he asked.

  She hadn't been around him much after what they'd done a couple of hours ago, he'd been busy with the students, teaching them lessons in survival that she was sure they would never need. But the teenagers loved them.

  "Yes, all good," she replied.

  She had some time for herself... she also needed space to think about things. This man wanted her, and she wanted him back even more. But every time she got involved with someone, something happened and everything turned to shit.

  Besides, she had an opportunity to make a difference in the school. I won't screw that up. Not for a man.

  The kids deserved better. She was finally beginning to feel accepted by them. Coming out here was the best decision she could have made.

  Well, maybe.

  She took a bite of her marshmallow. It melted in her mouth, the warm, half melted vanilla taste was delicious. She subconsciously turned to Enzo just in time to see his joy when he tasted his own, and the mere sight of that filled her with warmth.

  Everything was quiet. People talked in hushed voices, as if this moment was too good to ruin it by speaking out loud.

  Enzo walked over to the fire, poked at its base and its hot tendrils reached even higher, lighting the faces of everyone around in beautiful red and orange hues.

  Night came, and the sounds of nature enveloped the campsite. They watched the sun go and talked comfortably now. Some of the students laid on the grass and just looked up, admiring the view. She did the same and the magnificence of the firmament made her throat tighten up with emotion.

  The multitude of stars, shining over vast distances, their light traversing the darkness of space and finally reaching this place... it was majestic.

  "I don't remember the last time I got to see the stars like this," she found herself whispering.

  Mr. Dunley talked about something on the other side of the fire, his voice impossible to miss, even if she didn't really understand what he was saying.

  "City people don't know what they're missing."

  She and Enzo laid next to each other, at a safe distance, of course. None of them wanted the rest of the group to suspect anything.

  "Am I a city girl?" she teased.

  "Don't worry, it's not so bad," he replied with a chuckle.

  She elbowed him.

  "Watch out, Mr. Gallagher, city people might be dangerous."

  "I'll take my chances."

  His pinky finger grazed the outer side of her hand, the butterflies in her stomach made her stop breathing for a second.

  Her mind yelled run! but she couldn't do it.

  She wiggled her pinky over Enzo's, their hands hidden in the dark grass, the fire barely able to shed light on them.

  "Make a wish," he said.

  She turned to him, puzzled.

  "Why?"

  "Just trust me."

  She swallowed. Then, up above, a shooting star traversed the night sky. Her chest almost hurt with surprise.

  "Did you see that?" a girl a few steps away from her said, "a shooting star!"

  The students started talking excitedly. But she couldn't pay attention to them. Enzo called it first.

  "How did you know? How—?

  "Magic."

  Was it possible? She didn't know if she was scared or happy or surprised.

  Then she saw another one. Her mouth fell open, then she smiled. It was beautiful.

  "I'm kidding," he said.

  She turned to him, without saying a word.

  "I planned this trip because this weekend is the Leonids meteor shower, we'll have the best show in the past ten years.

  Of course. This couldn't just be a camping trip. Oh, no. This guy had to even choose the best date to come out here.

  "You're a nerd," she told him.

  "You like it?" he said meeting her eyes, his pinky finger wrapping on hers for a second, and that was it. She melted.

  "Obviously not. I'm a cool girl. We don't get along with nerds."

  He narrowed his eyes, grinning.

  "You take that back."

  She chuckled, "I won't."

  His finger wrapped on hers tighter, "don't make me make you."

  "Is that a threat?"

  He shrugged, "just a warning."

  "I'll take my chances."

  She wished he held her right now. Feel his warm body envelop her. That would be the perfect ending to this awesome night.

  But of course they couldn't do that.

  Their eyes locked and for a brief second she thought he was going to move over and kiss her, right there in front of everyone. A million shivers ran down her spine, she knew that if he did, she wouldn't move away.

  He saw her differently now. As if he...

  "I brought some blankets—" a student said, stopping before finishing the sentence.

  She immediately moved her finger away and reached up, with a half chuckle that she was sure sounded like a crazy person's.

  "Yes, thank you!"

  Her words came out half mumbled.

  The student, Joe, wasn't stupid. His face told her he saw something he wasn't supposed to. He was quiet, pretending he didn't notice anything weird between them.

  Hopefully he didn't see our hands.

  He gave her the blanket and she covered herself with it.

  "You?" he asked Enzo.

  "I'm fine, Joe, ask the other girls first."

  "Sure," he said, walking away.

  It's fine, he didn't notice. We were quick enough.

  "Sorry to interrupt," he finished, with his back to them.

  Her insides churned. Her heart raced. They made a mistake.

  CHAPTER 27

  Sunday. Everyone relaxed at the camp, the guys played a bit of soccer, some girls joined them too. Other students asked permission to go exploring. All in all, everything was going smoothly.

  Well, not everything.

  Audrey changed since Joe brought her the blanket. Enzo knew why, but his bear didn't care. It wanted her. But it roared in anger, knowing what was happening.

  He had to ignore it. It was almost time to leave. He knew she wouldn't sit next to him, worried about her career.

  I shouldn't have done that.

  He was prepared to step back, let things cool off, give her some space. But he didn't really want to.

  Would it really be so bad if people found out?

  Well. In normal circumstances it wouldn't. But she'd been at the school less than six months. What kind of teacher starts a relationship so soon after arriving? What would the parents think?

  Nothing. Most of the parents don't care or don't mind. But what about the School Board? This wa
s something they had to be very careful about.

  By the time everyone got back on the buses, Enzo had exchanged less than ten sentences with her.

  She pretended everything was fine, but obviously it wasn't. He took a step back and waited for her to approach him, it wasn't in him to make her feel uncomfortable.

  She did, however, joined him on the bus. Okay, that's something. For a moment I thought she would hop on the other one. There wasn't any space available next to him like before, no problem. He could be patient—

  A cold shiver ran down his spine.

  His bear snapped, roaring in anger. Goosebumps broke out on his skin. The bear clawed and bit inside of him, its hot rage even more violent than usual, as if about to rip out of his flesh, not caring about where he was, its fury unstoppable.

  It was just a couple of seconds, but they felt like an eternity.

  He didn't understand why it acted like that, maybe it's because it didn't get to come out yesterday. He used all of his strength to push it back inside. But some lingering anger remained. Maybe that's what was bothering it.

  The buses whirred and started with a noise that teared down the natural beauty of the landscape.

  That's when he picked up a strange, familiar scent. He whiffed at the air again but couldn't find it again, am I going crazy?

  No. He was sure it was there. A putrid stench hiding beneath the acid smoke of burned up diesel.

  His blood rushed through his veins faster and faster, his bear roared in anger.

  But he had to play it cool.

  The students around him were happy and tired, he tried using that image to calm himself down, to make the beast understand. Something strange was happening.

  He knew it was the diseased stink of the Rot.

  Impossible.

  But was it really impossible? It had been years since the White Paws —his crew— dealt a killing blow to it, he was sure it wouldn't be able to come back.

  There was no way it would try to, not in White Paws territory. Its dark will took a blow, and he was sure it wouldn't come back out of whatever existence it came from to sneak back into the world.

  The White Paws had made sure the Shadowlands had been taken care of, along with the Rot and the diseased mockeries of life that tried to come through to the world.

  Each White Paw, including him, protected their territory, making sure everything was safe. Ever since the last time they saw a vile thing and kicked it back to whatever hell it came from, they hadn't had any problem. The whole area was thriving with life.

  He tried sniffing again. Nothing. He held his anger but his bear was furious. Snarling and clawing and wanting to come out and fight.

  The bus started moving and before anything bad happened, he stood up.

  "Wait up, Doug, wait up."

  The driver looked at him through the big rearview mirror, every student and teacher frowned at him. What was going on?

  Enzo stepped to the front of the bus, "I'm gonna walk back to town."

  Everyone frowned, unable to believe that after all the trekking and playing, Enzo still wanted to exercise.

  "Enzo, what's going on? Are you sure you want to—?"

  "All's good, Miss Rodriguez, don't worry, make sure everyone gets back safe."

  Enzo smiled. At least Audrey worried about him enough to ask him what was happening.

  Nobody replied. Doug didn't even say anything, just pulled a lever and opened the door.

  Enzo got off and waved the students good-bye. Audrey looked at him, trying to understand why he did that, but he couldn't tell her.

  At least not now.

  CHAPTER 28

  Audrey closed the door to her apartment and dropped her backpack on the floor, taking a deep breath.

  She couldn't take Enzo off her mind.

  Yesterday had been amazing in all kinds of ways, today, well... she probably fucked things up by not talking to him, but stepping off the bus and wanting to come back... walking?

  "You gotta be kidding me," she said, leaving her keys on the entrance table, rushing to the bathroom in her room. She was so ready for a shower.

  What was she going to do? She had to talk to him. Make everything right. Or at least put everything on the table so they could sort it out.

  She got in the shower, hot of course, and every muscle in her body instantly relaxed.

  It was so comfortable it was almost painful.

  Could she and Enzo make this work? Maybe they could keep it quiet for a little longer, so no one would think she came to town for fun.

  She chuckled at that.

  She was acting stupid.

  "You know what? Fuck it."

  She was going to date the guy if she wanted to and the parents be damned. She was going to make the school the number one school in both test scores and sports, even if it took her fifty years.

  She only needed the infrastructure, kids were good, and most of the teachers seemed to really like their jobs.

  This was better than any of the previous schools she worked at. Even private schools. These people had the will to work and get ahead. She would make it right, give them all she got.

  But what about—

  "No," she almost yelled, "no buts. No more fear."

  Water kept on dripping down on her back and for the first time in years, she felt like she had something... one thing, under control.

  And she was gonna make the best of it.

  CHAPTER 29

  Enzo kept working on the samples. As the de facto White Paws healer, he had some training in chemistry. Basic chemistry. But he knew what to look for, how compounds reacted with one another.

  He'd come to learn by trial and error how to find traces of his enemy.

  After he walked out of the bus he ran into the forest and shifted, looking for the source of the scent.

  But he didn't find it.

  Frustration flooded him.

  He hadn't told Damien, his alpha, anything. And he didn't plan to unless he had something concrete, proof. Not a mere conjecture.

  This is fucking stupid.

  He searched for miles, spiraling out of the parking area, trying to find the scent again, but it was impossible.

  He couldn't convince himself he'd been mistaken, though.

  After hours of searching, he shifted back to human form and picked up samples. Bark, dirt, leaves, even freaking rocks.

  Anything that could give him a clue as to why the stench of the Rot was back.

  But after extensive testing, he still had nothing.

  He looked at the digital watch on the side of the table, it's big red numbers said 01:38 A.M.

  Thank God for that, I wouldn't have known it was one in the morning if it didn't explicitly said it. Not that it's completely dark outside.

  The Rot was bad news. A sign that the Shadowlands had punctured reality. The White Paws had to seal the entry point, to prevent the corruption from spreading into the world.

  Finding explicit proof that the Rot was here was hard, but not finding anything at all? Either he fucked up somehow, or the damned thing was really not there.

  No. His instincts said otherwise.

  He pounded his fist at the table, took his goggles off, and threw them away.

  Think. Think about something else, get out of this rut.

  Her image was the only constant in his mind.

  He clicked his tongue. Maybe he made a mistake. Maybe he'd mistaken the scent with the mixed smell of everyone's sweat, including his own. The smog coming out of two diesel trucks... and of course, his mind completely messed up because of her. Because of everything that was happening.

  Mate...

  Yes. Because of that, too. The damn beast wanted to mate her. And he did so, too. From the first moment he saw her.

  He groaned and stretched his arms. The door cracked open, making Enzo jump from his seat, ready to kill.

  "Shit, man, didn't know you were so tense. Everything all right?"

  It was Maveric
k. One of his crew mates.

  Enzo sighed, then sat down on one of the lab's benches.

  "Yeah, all good."

  "What are you doing up so late?"

  Maverick shrugged, "nothing. You?"

  "Just taking a stroll, Faith enjoys going out at night, you know how she is. She takes Ethan with her, teaches him how to control his abilities."

  Faith, the vampire who married a shifter. He didn't know who was the crazier one there. But one thing was for sure, they were made for each other.

  Enzo laughed, thinking about how miraculous was that she could see the sun. That was a complete impossibility.

  No. Her giving birth is the real miracle.

  Over the years, a lot of weird things happened around him, things that should not happen.

  He gasped, that's the answer he needed.

  "That's cool," Enzo replied.

  "Yeah, the kid is growing up, doing well at school, too."

  Enzo nodded, Ethan was growing up like a normal person, and he still had vampire abilities, and even a bear spirit. He could shift any time he wanted.

  It should have been impossible.

  But it really wasn't, if what he thought was happening was real. Holy fucking shit.

  "You okay, dude?" Mav said. He was the cool one of the bunch. The one whose home was out there with people, socializing, having fun.

  One thing Enzo could learn from him was to take things easy.

  "I just have to keep working."

  "Damn, dude. If you want me to leave just say so."

  Enzo chuckled, "you know I wouldn't do that, it would break your heart."

  "I'll break your face if you keep saying that."

  "You can try, mofo."

  Maverick went for it, his guard up, Enzo waited for him. Just as Mav was about to hit him, he pulled back with a chuckle.

  "See ya tomorrow, man. Don't work too hard."

  Enzo laughed, "Yeah, I'll go to bed soon. Say hi to everyone for me."

  "Will do."

  As soon as Maverick stepped off the small, container-like laboratory, Enzo went back to his experiments.

  But this time he would channel his energy. He never thought to look for the reason why the crew had been both cursed and blessed, living out here in the White Paws territory.