My Soul to Keep (The Soul Keeper Series - Young Adult Paranormal Romance)
Page 13
“Dr. Kennedy, I have Ms. Hale here when you’re ready.” She receives conformation. “Please go in.”
I feel a little under dressed for my visit today but I'm not here to make a fashion statement. I have been seeing this psychologist since my dad passed away; she has helped me deal with many of my issues. Dr. Kennedy is sitting at her desk wearing a dark pink sweater set and a beaded chunky necklace. Her light brown hair is pulled back at the crown with a half twist. She gives a no-nonsense smile that I have gotten used to.
“Brennen, what brings you by today?” She stands from her desk and makes her way to a linen arm chair. I sit Indian style on the oversized ottoman.
“My life has been a wreck since I started my senior year.”
“Oh why is that? Are the dreams still bothering you?”
“Actually the dreams have stopped all together. The thing that is bothering me is well, I sort of kissed a guy that maybe I shouldn't have and then we fell in love, but I already had a boyfriend. Now, the one I fell in love with is gone and I don't know what to do with my boyfriend. I tried breaking up with him, but that didn't go so well.”
“So is that the only thing that's troubling you?
“No.”
“Well what is it? You can tell me anything you know that, right.”
“I can't tell anyone anything.”
“That's right, you can't tell anyone anything, or you won't be the only one who disappears.” She sneers and slides her necklace back and forth, much too calm for the maleficent threat she just spat out.
What? My jaw falls open. Oh no! No!
“Who are you really?” I take to my feet, ready to bolt.
“I'm someone who wants to see you fulfill your destiny.” Her tones changes back to the caring doctor facade.
“Is Elijah okay? Please I have to know.”
“He has been removed from your guard, but I can assure you that you are well protected.”
“So is he still an angel?”
“Yes for heaven sakes Elijah is still an angel. He is fine.”
“Prove it.”
“I don't have to prove anything to you.”
“Then I'm done, I won't be anybody's puppet on a string.” I turn and go toward the door.
“The world is going to end without you on board.”
“My world has already ended Doctor or whatever the hell you are.” I hold my hand on the knob. Realizing that I have to make a stand, I walk out of the door, and don't look back. I take off in a sprint and run. I need to get as far away from that woman as possible. I run past the parking lot and down the street and keep going.
How is this even possible? I can't trust anyone. I have been confiding in Dr. Kennedy for years. I replay her cold words in my head. “You can't tell anyone anything, or you won't be the only one who disappears.” Do they think that threatening my life will make me more compliant? Do they think taking Elijah away will make me love him any less? She said he was okay, but I can't believe anything that comes out of her mouth now, not after lying to me for two years.
I don't know where the stamina came from but by the time I stopped to catch my breath, night had fallen. I was drenched from sweat and my tears had long since dried. I looked around to gather my bearings; I was on a bridge on Lafayette Boulevard, miles from the good doctor, and my car. If only this bridge were higher and the water deeper. I sit atop the rail and rest, watching the water flow rapidly under my feet. They think I am going to save the whole world, and from what, with what? I'm not exactly a rocket scientist or anything special. I am just a girl whose parents died, whose own mother didn't want her. The water churns below and I wish I could slip away with it. The darkness sets in around me.
A car slowly creeps up next to me. “Don't jump, love.” No! It can't be. I hear his voice. I turn slowly as if the moment isn't real. He is already out of the car and next to me in a moment. He scoops me off the bridge and pulls me into an embrace against his body.
“Elijah!” I squeeze my arms around his neck. “You’re back!” I glance over his shoulder and see Dr. Kennedy in the driver’s seat of a BMW.
“Oh Brennen I can't stay. I just wanted the chance to tell you good-bye.”
“What? No! Elijah you can't leave me again!” He caresses the back of my head down the length of my hair. His hands on me feel rapturous.
“Shh, shh, I know. I promise I will see you again one day. I've been reassigned.” He pulls me into a steely hug, like the kind my dad used to give me before he would leave on assignment. It feels like good-bye. “I need you too. Believe me,” he sighs.
“After you were taken, my house was set on fire! Sam, he was possessed and attacked me, he almost…I can’t even say the word.” A tear rolls down my cheek as I think of it. I see the horror cross his features and I know he knows what I mean. “And last night, I saw one of them in my room.” His jaw clenches into anger. I can tell he is trying to subdue his emotions, and his tense face begins to soften.
“I'll find a way to get back to you, I promise.” He holds me so tightly, that I can feel the love undulating off of him.
“Why are they doing this?”
“They are doing this because you are their only hope.”
“What about her?” I point my head toward the doctor.
“You need to listen to her; she really is on your side.”
“Yeah well it didn't really seem that way when she was threatening my life,” I say full of malice. He takes his finger and raises my chin.
“That's because I'm the only one who knows how to handle you, love.” He smiles coyly at first and then widens into his I-can-get-whatever-I-want because you crave me smile. “She does want to apologize to you.” I see his lips longing to touch mine again and I know that this is just as painful for him as it is for me.
“Yes you do tend to handle me.” I give a wry smile.
“There's my girl.” He returns the look.
“How long will you be gone?”
“It may be years, but I don't want you to wait for me. I want your life to be filled with joy. Go to Harvard and have the time of your life. Fall in love, get married, and have beautiful little babies that have your sparkling emerald eyes. Live your life Brennen. I would never forgive myself if you didn't.” I lay my head on his chest and listen to his beautiful heartbeat. “Promise me you'll try.” I can't bear to think of a life without him.
“Do you live in heaven?”
“Brennen, promise me.” He scolds.
“I can't promise you that.”
He sighs, “No.”
“So then where is it you live?”
“My home is in between I suppose. Just outside the gates, lies the realm in between Heaven and Earth. That is where the Cherubim reside when we are not on a mission, or delivering a message.” I wonder how beautiful such a place like that may be. Perhaps he will take me there one day.
“Where you ever able to find out whom my mother was?”
“They won't tell me anything anymore, I am in pretty hot water right now. I cashed in all of my favors just to have a moment with you.” I want to ask him more, but our time together is precious and evanescent.
“I love you.”
“I love you too, Brennen.” I press my cheek to his embracing the warmth ebbing from his skin. I feel like he is here to talk me off the ledge. I suppose they sent him here now to handle me. Not that I mind. He can handle me anytime he feels an itch to.
“It’s time.” He lingers over my lips for a moment, and then takes my hand leading me back to the car. I wince as he brushes over my bruised wrist. He turns to me and pulls up my sleeve. His nostrils flare out. “Sam?” I nod. He motions he wants me to show him the rest so I lift my shirt, displaying the unearthly yellow bruise.
“What do you think did this?” Anguish and anger mix on his face causing havoc with his regal beauty.
“This ends now!” He leads me to the car, never answering my question. In this case not knowing may be the better choice.
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“In seventeen years, she has never sustained one single mark on her body and in two days under Will's care she is nearly incinerated, covered in bruises and has demons planning sleepovers in her room at night! And Elena, she was almost raped,” he seethes the last part out in a revolted tone.
“Elijah, it's out of my hands. You were pulled from her guard because you fell in love with her, you fool you’ve compromised the entire mission.” Dr. Kennedy throws up her hands in exasperation. What? This is unbelievable.
“Unacceptable,” shouts Elijah while motioning for me to enter the back seat. He slides in beside me.
“Agreed, now can we move on? Is she in compliance?”
“Elena, she is a human. You need to treat her with compassion and understanding.” They act like I am not even in the car.
“I'm sorry Brennen. I do care about you.” Her tongue mangles around the words like it took every bit of her swallowed pride to extrude the verse.
“Really, or is that just the part your being forced to play?” I retaliate. She glares back in the rear view mirror. Elijah whispers in my ear.
“Just give her a chance, love.” He nuzzles my neck with his fingers. I close my eyes and relish in his touch.
“I can't do this without you.”
“Elena is going to help you. She is actually here to coach you in the role you will play to help save the world.” I laugh at how absurd the thought is.
“I am no superhero.” Elena looks back in the mirror with humor in her eyes and shakes her head at me. We reach the office in just a few minutes, and my heart races knowing my time with Elijah is almost gone.
“I'll let you two have some privacy I need to get my laptop from the office.” She gets out of the car. Tears moisten my eyes but I try to keep them from spilling.
“Brennen I meant what I said earlier. You need to move on with your life and soon. We will have our time together one day I promise. I hate this just as much as you do. And if I so much as hear you scraped a knee on Will's watch– he is toast.”
“How do I go on? How will you go on?”
“Brennen you will go on the way you did before you met me. With every devastating loss that you have ever had to suffer, you have always just gotten through one day, one hour, one minute at a time. It always gets better, it may not always be bearable, but you have the resilience of a falling cat. You always pick yourself up and somehow you get through it. I will try to learn from your example. You are the bravest girl in the world.” He hugs me and I hear a faint hang-up in his voice and I know that he is hiding tears from me; mine spill over in silent waves. I wipe them away with my fingers.
“I love you Brennen and I always will.”
“I love you too. Please find a way to come back to me, soon. Okay? Really soon.”
“I will, I promise.”
“Goodbye baby.” He releases me, and our fingers slide apart as he fades away before my eyes.
“I'll see you soon.” The car is empty and quiet. I grab the box of tissues from the good doctor’s front seat and clean my face. I draw in several ragged breaths. I get out of the car not wanting to see her face when she comes back. The fact that I could physically hurt her is a real possibility right now. Okay, I made it through one minute Elijah now for the next. I start the ignition and put the car in gear and drive home.
I pull into my driveway after ten p.m. and head straight for the shower. I feel totally grimy and I hate that my last moment with Elijah was spent with me covered in old sweat. I am thankful that we at least got to have a proper good-bye. I am thankful that he is okay. I think about everything we talked about tonight. The one thing that sticks in my mind is how he said he had never let me get a single mark in seventeen years. Its true now that I think about it, I have never had any sort of injury. He is excellent at his job. I hope this new guy steps up his game or I'll be toast.
As I lay in bed, I think about the place that Elijah says is somewhere in between. I fall asleep imagining a place so beautiful that it would create a man like him.
Chapter 12~ Recovery
It’s been six weeks and three days since Elijah left. I haven't had any more strange occurrences happen and I am finally able to sleep with the light off again. Sam is recovering, his ribs are almost healed. He is trying to take things slow with me after I poured my heart out to him one night and tried to break up with him. I play the conversation over in my head.
“Sam I need to tell you something.”
“You’re in love with Elijah?”
“What? How did you...” I realize that it is the same line he used the night he was possessed and it throws me off for a second.
“I saw from the first day of school, and again at the homecoming dance. I wondered if you would ever look at me the way you look at him.”
“You wanted to rub it in his face that you had me that night?”
“I've never had you Brennen.”
“Sam, I'm sorry. I just don't feel that way about you.”
“I know you’re confused right now, but will you do me a favor?”
“Of course.”
“Well, Elijah's gone now and I know you are taking it hard, but don't end things between us. Just let me be there for you, that's all I want.” I reluctantly agree because I care about him and I don’t want to hurt him anymore. So Sam and I have been doing the friend thing for a few weeks now and I am glad I have him in my life. He has become my best friend. Emily has been very supportive as well but she spends most of her time with Chris. Tonight she is coming over to spend the night and we are going to have a girl's day all day tomorrow.
I sit under our tree at lunch and the rest of the crew arrives. I bought a sushi roll at the grocery store on the way to school this morning. I crack the top to an Izzie pop and take the paper off of my chop sticks.
“Now if you wanted fish, I could have fired up the grill and at least cooked it for you first,” Sam teases in his adorable Texas drawl.
“Try it you will love it!” He backs away like I am offering him the gum off of my shoe. I pop a piece in my mouth.
“Mm, still swimming,” I tease. He makes a gagging motion. Emily and Chris sit down and he feeds her a grape. She looks hungrily into his eyes before consuming it. Jeez get a room. Sam is thinking the same thing.
“Brennen if you don't have plans this Thanksgiving well, I was wondering if you’d like to join us,” Sam asks. His voice is anxious about what my answer will be.
“I think I would like that Sam, thank you. I can't stay too long though, I am having dinner with Grandma.”
“Okay well my dad is smoking the turkey and the man could win awards on his birds let me tell you.”
“What should I bring?”
“Well you are a really good cook, you bring whatever you like. I am sure there won't be any left.”
“What other sides or desserts will there be? I don't want to step on any toes.” He looks down and chews his lip. I know that look. I bet they don't cook much since their mom died.
“I tell you what, how about I get there early and help cook a feast for your family. I will teach your sisters how to make homemade mashed potatoes and a few other traditional holiday staples.”
“Babe you don't have to go through all that trouble, they are fine with instant potatoes and a box of Kraft macaroni.” He is still in the habit of referring to me as babe and it still stings, each time the same as before.
“Well maybe they are, but I have standards,” I tease as I pull snobbishly at my jacket cuffs. “Which do you prefer pumpkin pie or pecan?”
“Um, I would have to go with both,” he says and I laugh.
“Okay, both it is then.” I pop another piece of spicy tuna roll in my mouth.
“What are your plans for Thanksgiving Em?”
“Oh the usual, my mom will spend three days in the kitchen and my dad will probably burn down the garage trying to fry a turkey. But Chris is coming so he can be there to put it out.” Chris shakes his head.
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nbsp; “Oh no, with my luck your dad would try to fry me. I'm staying in the kitchen with the women.”
“I take it your dad still isn't fond of Chris?”
“You know my dad. He never thinks anyone is good enough for his little girl.”
I nod and think about how my dad would have been the same way. I picture him and Elijah in a wrestling match to end all. Sam sees the look on my face and knows just who I am thinking of. It makes me feel nauseous. Get through one minute Brennen. I don't know why he sticks around.
After school I drive to visit Grandma and make sure she is still eating. I have been going every weekday now because I don't think she has much longer. She doesn't remember me when I go, but she lets me feed her soup and I read to her from which ever Lit book I am on at the time.
Once at my temporary home, I make myself a turkey and avocado Panini on the sandwich press. I decide to watch a little television until Emily arrives. I need to catch up on my world news. There are several anti-US protests going on across the world, that's not good. I haven't heard from Dr. Faux Kennedy since that day, and I wonder if she is waiting for me to come to her. I still feel the urge to inflict bodily harm against her, so I think it would be best to give her some space.
The doorbell rings about eight and I let Emily in.
“Hey Em, I'm glad you could make it.”
“Thanks Brennen I'm just glad to get away from my parents.” Emily's family is very Brady so I don't know what could possibly be wrong. She is an only child and her mother and father both think she walks on water, I think she's pretty special too.
“Tea?” She nods putting her bag down by the stairs. I go into the kitchen and put the kettle on. Tea reminds me of Elijah so I sigh.
“I have Chai, Earl Grey, or Lemon Zing.”
“Earl Grey, please.” I set out tea cups and saucers.
“So what is going on at home?”
“I told my parents that I want to take a year to travel and they think I will be throwing my future away.”
“Oh yes, I agree. You'll go to Paris and Rome and just want to sit around drinking lattes and absorb culture through your ears.” We giggle.