The Heart Knows It

by Julie Allan

  Lizzie did as she was instructed and found an envelope attached. She opened it and removed the documents inside. Bennett came and stood over Lizzie’s shoulder. They looked together and were stunned. It was a legal document officially making Lizzie and Bennett the legal owners of the house.

  “I don’t know what to say,” Bennett said shaking his head. He placed his hand on Lizzie’s shoulder.

  “You don’t need to say anything; I really want this house to be your family’s home. It would be Lizzie’s someday anyway. I just moved up the timeline,” Aunt Dorothy reassured Bennett.

  Lizzie looked across the table at Aunt Dorothy, “But this is still your home!”

  “Of course it is, child, but it is yours as well. Besides, now the tax bill comes to you,” Aunt Dorothy said, her eyes twinkling with mischief.

  Dot touched Lizzie’s arm. “Can I look at the pictures again?”

  Lizzie pushed the album over to Dot, “Of course, sweetie.”

  Dot slowly turned the pages and examined the photos with Sawyer at her elbow. Lizzie’s heart was full. All she truly held dear was gathered around this table. She concentrated on the scene around her trying to record it in her memory bank. Dot got to the end with the photo of all of them surrounding Aunt Dorothy on the front steps.

  Dot looked at her mother. “We’ll have to start collecting pictures for the next album,”

  Lizzie raised her eyebrows. “The next album?”

  “Yeah, of all the great times we are going to have living in this house.”

  Lizzie’s eyes began to well with tears. “Yes, I think we should take one right now.”

  Bennett grabbed his phone from the charging station and attached the selfie stick Sawyer had gotten from Santa. The family gathered behind Aunt Dorothy’s chair, and she held up the album. Now Lizzie would have documentation of this moment. Bennett hugged her and time stood still, at least for a split second.

  “C’mon Sawyer, Dot, we need to clean up all that wrapping paper and get changed,” Bennett said motioning for Sawyer to follow him.

  Lizzie enveloped Aunt Dorothy from behind and kissed the top of her head. She whispered in her ear, “Thank you.”

  “You are welcome, child . . . You are welcome.”

  The week between Christmas and New Year’s was a blur of activity. Things were still busy at The Biscuit Box and every night brought a get together with friends or family. They had a family dinner at Sunset House where Bennett’s parents lived, and an oyster roast at M.A.’s house. They also had neighbors over for barbecue and bowl games. Lizzie began to wonder if she would have the stamina to celebrate New Year’s Eve.

  New Year’s Eve was always special for Lizzie and Bennett. It was their anniversary and this year, Lizzie wanted to make it memorable. She arranged for Faith to spend the night with Aunt Dorothy and the kids, just in case Aunt Dorothy needed any help. Then she had booked a romantic suite at a boutique hotel downtown. Lizzie had also booked a table at one of her favorite restaurants—The Grocery.

  Lizzie and Bennett checked into their suite in the early afternoon and promptly indulged in what all adults long for, an afternoon nap. Lizzie set the alarm; she wanted to give herself plenty of time to primp and dress for their night on the town. When the alarm went off, they lay there, stretching and yawning.

  Bennett pulled Lizzie into him, “This was a great way to end this week. We have been so busy; I was almost able to forget I start chemo next week.”

  Lizzie stiffened. With all the activity she had put it out of her mind and the reality of it came crashing back. “I didn’t realize you were worried about it.”

  “I’m not worried; I am just dreading the interruption to our lives. I also am not relishing being sidelined from work.”

  “If your recovery from surgery is any indication, I would say you are definitely going to be difficult to live with.” Lizzie turned so she could face Bennett clearly. “You really aren’t worried? I don’t mean about the chemo, but about the cancer.”

  Bennett brushed his hand across her forehead. “No, I believe Dr. Roberts when he said we caught this early. I have been reading lots of articles and experiences of other patients, and I think I have a good understanding of what I have to go through, but I have to believe the outcome will be good.”

  “I had no idea you had been researching. I have been doing that too. Why didn’t you talk with me about it?”

  Bennett kissed Lizzie on the forehead. “I know you, Lizzie. I know that if we talked about it too much, you would get hyper-focused and worry way too much.”

  Lizzie sat up. “I can handle the worry, but I don’t think I can handle the idea of you keeping your thoughts from me. We are a team, and you can count on me.”

  Bennett sat up next to her, “I do know that. I guess I’m in the habit of protecting you. After all, I have been doing it since we were in Kindergarten.”

  “I realize that, and I appreciate it, but maybe it’s my turn to protect you.”

  Bennett leaned back against the headboard, “I will make you a deal, I will share my thoughts and the information I come across about this cancer if you promise to try and not think the worst of the situation. I have to focus on the best outcome. Getting there is my goal.”

  “I will try my best.” Lizzie stood up and headed for the bathroom. “I better start getting myself gussied up for our night on the town.”

  A few hours later they stepped out into the cool early evening air. The mild weather that had blanketed the lowcountry in mid-December was holding, but the forecast was calling for a radical change in the coming days. That was weather in Charleston, a rollercoaster ride of temperatures and conditions. Lizzie was thankful for the mild conditions. She did not want to cover her carefully chosen outfit with a coat. Lizzie was stunning in her signature emerald green. Her dress was an elegant crepe de chine halter style that came just above the knee. She complemented the dress with a sparkly, art deco style statement necklace and drop earrings with a matching bracelet. Even her high heels had sparkly straps. She had hot-rolled her hair into big loose curls that framed her face and tumbled onto her bare shoulders. She had a cream-colored pashmina, and a monogrammed silver clutch to carry lipstick and other essentials.

  They began to stroll down to a small bar to have a pre-dinner drink. “You are one hot mama,” Bennett said as he held onto her arm, guiding her down the uneven sidewalks.

  “You spiff up pretty good yourself,” Lizzie said.

  Bennett did look handsome in his classic cut tuxedo. He wore the monogrammed silver cufflinks Lizzie had given him as a wedding present. “Fifteen years of wedded bliss, my love, and forty years of loving you.”

  Lizzie leaned closer to Bennett. “I have definitely loved you since kindergarten. I wish we were celebrating our twenty-fifth instead of our fifteenth.”

  “So we had a ten-year detour, but we ended up together in the end. I don’t think the number of years is what counts; it’s how we live those years together.”

  Lizzie’s fear of losing Bennett bubbled to the surface. How many more years will we be blessed to have? She pushed the fear back down. “I live every day thankful for you.”

  They stopped in front of the bar, and Bennett pulled Lizzie into a warm and gentle kiss. He opened the door, and they stepped inside. The crowd was still pretty light so finding a small table was easy. Lizzie loved that the décor was warm with dark woods and leather chairs. Bennett pulled out her chair for her and pushed her in gently. They ordered their drinks and reminisced about their wedding. By the time they moved towards the restaurant, the bar was filling up with revelers.

  The New Year’s Eve menu at The Grocery was fantastic. They shared several small plates and indulged in dessert, they were in awe of the creations put before them. The chef followed the tenets of the farm to table movement, and each bite reflected that. They strolled back down King Street towards Marion Square where musicians were performing. The city was vibrant with people celebrating the dawn of a new
year. The lights sparkled like stars and even the night could not hide the charm of Charleston architecture.

  They reached the corner of King and Calhoun, part of Marion Square. The fountain was lit, and Lizzie was drawn to it. “I think we ought to make a wish. Do you have a penny?”

  Bennett dug into his pocket and fishing out a penny handed it to her. Lizzie stood with her back to the fountain, rubbing the penny between her thumb and her forefinger. She closed her eyes and began to formulate her wish. I wish that in the coming year Bennett will become . . . Before she could finish her thought, she felt a breeze, then a push and she went flying back. Her knees buckled over the edge of the fountain, and her backside set down into the water.

  The shock of the cold water raced through her whole body. Her embarrassment counteracted the cold. Humiliation burned through her.

  Several sets of hands grabbed at her. Stunned and beginning to shiver Lizzie looked at Bennett. “What happened?”

  A teenage boy with earbuds dangling was repeatedly apologizing, and he looked truly miserable. “I didn’t see you,” he said.

  Bennett wrapped his tuxedo jacket around Lizzie. “Ace here ran you over with his skateboard.”

  Bennett turned to the young man, “It’s alright Son, no harm done, but please look out where you’re going.”

  Lizzie gave him a weak smile. “Yes, no worries, I’m prone to this kind of thing, anyway.”

  The young man nodded and skated away as fast as he could. Bennett took a hard look at Lizzie and laughed to the point only his coughing could make him stop. “I think we better get a ride back to the hotel.”

  “Yes, I need to get in a warm shower fast.” Lizzie laughed, “At least this wasn’t entirely my doing.”

  Luckily there was a bike powered rickshaw driver that had just dropped a couple off at the hotel on the corner across the street and Bennett quickly hailed the driver. A few moments later they were back in their room, and Lizzie was warming up in a steamy shower.

  She blew dried her hair and came out in the silky robe Bennett had given her for Christmas. Bennett had procured a bottle of prosecco and some chocolates. He poured them each a glass and held out one to her.

  Lizzie climbed on the bed, “Let’s drink to fifteen years of marriage and many years more.” She raised her glass, and Bennett brought his up to meet hers.

  “I say we also drink to love. May love continue to be the glue that holds us together.” They each drank a sip, then Bennett took the glass from Lizzie’s hand and set it with his on the bedside table. He reached up and turned out the light. Lizzie leaned forward, and Bennett leaned in, “Happy Anniversary, my love.”

  The next morning, they reluctantly checked out, it had been a date night to remember. Lizzie was determined to hold onto the glow. She was looking forward to the annual family New Year’s Day gathering. They would be going over to Amy’s for the traditional Hoppin’ John and Collards, after a trip out to the Sullivan’s Island Polar Plunge, to raise money for Special Olympics. This year Dot and Sawyer were going to join their older cousins in the chilly Atlantic waters, so Lizzie had packed a huge bag of towels. The air temp was sixty-two, but the wind was brisk, a cold front was definitely on the way. Luckily the sun was bright, and only a few wispy clouds were moving across the sky. Lizzie turned her face to the sun, soaking up all the warmth it would give.

  Dot came out of the water running for a towel. “Can you believe how cold it is?”

  Lizzie and Bennett smiled at each other. They had agreed to keep Lizzie’s fountain mishap to themselves. Lizzie rubbed Dot vigorously with the towel. “I can’t imagine.”

  At Amy’s house, Lizzie helped stir the collards and told all about the wonderful food they had eaten the night before. This meal they were preparing was much simpler but no less special. It was reassuring to adhere to tradition. The menu may have been time-honored, but Lizzie knew that was not the magic, it was the gathering of loved ones to share the food that brought the luck and hope for the New Year.

  They sat around the table to eat the food that would bring them good luck. No one had to say it; Lizzie knew they were all hoping for the same thing.

  Chapter 12

  Lizzie and Bennett walked hand in hand through the automatic glass doors of the hospital. Winter had finally decided to make an appearance, and the cold wind blustered in with them. Both of them were bundled up in coats and scarves. The bubble of the holidays had burst, and now they were forced to face the reality of Bennett’s cancer. While Bennett signed in at the desk, Lizzie unwrapped her scarf and stuffed it into her bag. She removed her coat and folded it over the bag now at her feet. Bennett came and sat down next to her. They did not talk, but Bennett held onto Lizzie’s hand.

  They did not have to wait long before Bennett was called back for a CT scan. Lizzie dug her book out of her bag and tried to concentrate. Lizzie had planned to come to all of Bennett’s appointments and treatments. She knew how fortunate she was to be able to. Her research had prepared her for what to expect with Bennett’s appointments, but not how to be the waiting spouse.

  Lizzie had managed to get through two chapters by the time Bennett came to get her. They took the elevator up a few floors to Dr. Robert’s office. After an exchange of pleasantries, Dr. Roberts laid out for them the plan for the next eight weeks.

  “I want to reiterate how fortunate you are that your cancer was caught early. I was really pleased with the outcome of your surgery, and now we need to move to the next phase.” Dr. Roberts paused, and Lizzie gripped the pen in her hand, ready to take notes.

  Bennett leaned forward, “I’m definitely ready to get on with this. The sooner we do, the sooner I can get back to normal.”

  Dr. Roberts smiled. “I am confident we can get there, but I want to be frank with you, the next eight weeks are not going to be easy.”

  He went on to explain Bennett would be undergoing a combination of radiation and chemotherapy. The scans that were done this morning were to prepare for the radiation, and Bennett would need to return on Thursday for something they called a simulation. The simulation would map out the radiation treatment. Once they started the radiation the following Monday, Bennett would have radiation five days a week for five weeks.

  Bennett and Lizzie exchanged glances. “So should we plan on moving in?” Bennett asked.

  Dr. Robert’s laughed. “You aren’t the first one to ask that. The good news is, once the simulation is charted, each session will only last a few minutes, and we have a remarkable scheduling team that will keep your time each day as consistent as possible.”

  “You mentioned chemotherapy as well. How does that fit in the picture?” Lizzie asked.

  “We will do one, four-week course of chemo during this time. That will involve three days of treatment each of the four weeks, and we will evaluate our progress with scans after we finish the course of radiation.”

  “So will this be over in seven or eight weeks, or will we have to do it again?” Bennett asked.

  “We really won’t know that until we see how you respond to treatment. However, I will say again, people who are fortunate enough to be diagnosed at such an early stage have a great prognosis.” Dr. Roberts smiled reassuringly.

  Lizzie wondered if Dr. Roberts was always this upbeat. She hoped she would never have to find out.

  They left the hospital with an armful of literature and eight weeks of appointments. Bennett was pleased that he could get a mid-morning time for his daily dose of radiation. Thursday would be a long appointment, but after that is sounded so easy. Lizzie was not as optimistic. She had been reading about the expected side effects of radiation and knew that the chemo would only make it worse.

  “Well, I guess it is good we’re closing on the house tomorrow.” Bennett adjusted the visor against the intense sun coming through the windshield.

  “Definitely, I’m certainly happy to have that off our plate, but it is still a bit sad. We did move in there as newlyweds and brought both of our babi
es home there.”

  “True, it is across the street, so we will still see it. Besides, Aunt Dorothy’s . . . I mean our house has lots of memories for us as well.”

  “Hopefully many more.” Lizzie put a hand over her mouth wishing she could put the words back in. She did not mean to verbalize her thought. Too late now.

  “Lizzie, we agreed we were going to think positively.” Bennett grabbed her hand and squeezed.

  “I am being positive! More good memories, that is all positive.” Lizzie glanced over at Bennett, hoping he would leave it.

  “After I drop you off I’m going to meet with Jeremy and go over the plan for B.E.W. Enterprises for the next eight weeks. What are you going to do with the rest of the day?”

  Lizzie was relieved Bennett chose to gloss over her worry. “I think I will do the same with The Biscuit Box. Before you know it, Valentine’s Day will be upon us.” Lizzie’s business was always anticipating the next holiday, and had become so beloved by locals and tourists alike, she never really had a slow season, at The Biscuit Box, it was busy and busier.

  Bennett dropped Lizzie back at the house and gave her a kiss. Lizzie went in so she could fill Aunt Dorothy in on what they had learned from Dr. Roberts.

  “My, that is quite an extensive plan for treatment.” Aunt Dorothy placed a mug of tea in front of Lizzie.

  “I know, the next few months around here are going to be very interesting.” Lizzie stirred some sugar into the fragrant Earl Grey.

  “Well, child, I think we will handle it all just fine.”

  “It’s not us I’m worried about. I don’t want the kids to be scared by the side effects they are going to witness. I also worry how Bennett is going to deal with it; he is not a good patient.”

  “Bennett will be challenging. I have no doubt about that,” Aunt Dorothy agreed with Lizzie.