Lucy at War

by Mary E. Twomey

  Just a few more months, and we’ll be back to normal. Good as new, Jamie assured me. You’re doing well. Go slow. Jamie had been pacing his room for some time now, attempting a round of pushups and taking my example of working extra hard to rehabilitate his body.

  I made it down the steps and leaned on the wall to make my way to the kitchen. My eyes appreciated the evening far more than daytime, but even midday, my retinas could mostly handle the aggravation. I meandered into the kitchen, searching through the cupboards for something fatty with lots of protein. I despised feeling so weak, and was determined to get my curves back as soon as possible.

  I pulled down the jar of peanut butter and a loaf of bread, and then raided the fridge, finding only some cheese that looked appetizing and was filled with the required fat. I sat down on the stool at the counter and made myself a peanut butter and cheddar cheese sandwich with feeble fingers.

  That’s going to make us sick, Jamie commented, though I could feel him salivating.

  You want me to make you one?

  I… no. That’s gross. I waited five seconds for his obligatory consideration, and he pushed out at me, Well, if you feel like making another and you find you can’t finish it, I wouldn’t be opposed.

  Will do. I’ll make you two. It’s actually pretty good. I smiled as I chewed. You sound better tonight. More like you.

  I need to see Britta. Convince Jens I’m ready.

  I scoffed. I’m halfway to nine kinds of crazy. My word doesn’t mean a whole lot. Just keep calm and try not to attack anyone. Eat what they bring you.

  Jamie’s response came back in a small voice. I’ll eat if you bring the food to me. Otherwise I’m afraid it’ll be poisoned.

  My heart broke for Jamie and all he’d been through. Of course I’ll make your food and bring it to you.

  A panicked Jens shouted through the house, “Where is she? Lucy! Lucy!”

  I wanted to answer, but my voice was uncooperative. Instead I banged on the counter three times.

  A freshly showered and shaved Jens tore down the stairs, knife out like a wild man. His eyes were wide as his head whipped in my direction. “You… are you okay? How did you get down here? The nurses know not to move you without discussing it with me!”

  I offered him a smile and a bite of my sandwich.

  He tucked his knife back into his bootstrap and made his way to my side. “You made yourself a sandwich? You came down here by yourself to make a sandwich?” I could tell he wanted to scold me, but he caught himself. “Is it good?”

  I held the coveted sandwich close, shaking my head with a slight tease.

  He pulled my chin toward him with a smirk I hadn’t seen in ages, looking over my face as if searching for something. “There it is. There’s that moxie. You lost it there for a while, but I knew no one could take it away for good.” Then, just to spite me, he leaned over and took a giant bite of my sandwich. His cocky grin mutated into a grimace a few chews in. “Ack! What is that? That’s disgusting! Is that peanut butter and cheese? Like, cheese and peanut butter?”

  I nodded, laughing silently from my stool as he spat it out in the sink and washed his mouth out under the faucet. That was worth all the work it took to get down the stairs. I loved Jens when his personality was in full swing. He’d been careful with me, gentlemanly and subdued. I’d hated it.

  “You put like, half the jar of peanut butter on there! And why the cheese? What, was the jar of tartar sauce empty? So gross! And you think I’m a freak for liking orange circus peanuts.” He shuddered. “Ugh. I can still taste it.”

  My smile touched my eyes, and for the first time in months, I felt a positive shift. So much of my personality had been based in silliness; being without jokes and shtick for so long felt wrong. I gazed up at Jens, wondering how on earth I’d survived without him.

  Jens paused his tirade on my awesome sandwich to look me over, taking in the small change. “You’re smiling. It looks like you again. I’ve missed that.”

  I motioned him over so I could get a good look at the face that had been hidden beneath a beard for far too long. When he plopped down on the stool next to me, I began to appreciate how giant he actually was. Six and a half feet tall and ripped with hulking muscles built for tearing apart trolls, Wereunicorns and the like, Jens was intimidatingly handsome. I reached over and traced one of the veins running the length of his bicep, smirking at his shiver. He caught my hand, scrutinizing me for signs of lucidity before he made his move.

  I didn’t feel like waiting. What can I say? There’s something about a garden gnome in a tight black t-shirt that makes a girl ask for what she wants. I slammed the mental door on Jamie, fisted Jens’s shirt and pulled him close, laying one on him as forcefully as I could. I didn’t have much strength in me, but Jens humored me, which I appreciated.

  I kissed him, long and passionately, relishing in the taste of lust I’d been barely surviving without. I didn’t want to be the sick person, and began to understand why Linus got pissed off when I was too nice to him when he was recovering. I wanted to be strong and sexy, to rival him in a verbal takedown and brag that he could never keep up with my sense of adventure. I wanted more than a sick room and grandfatherly pecks on the forehead. I wanted lips and tongue and fists and hair-grabbing.

  Jens was lost in the moment, and for that stretch of time, we were the only two sharing a fire that started from a single fledgling spark. He wasn’t aggressive, but he let me pull and grab at will, moaning with surprise and satiation as he sunk into me, eyes closed as I tugged on his lower lip.

  When my stool began to tip backwards, I grabbed tighter to him, and the kiss slowed to a stop before Jens knocked us both over. “Who knew you had that in you?” he breathed, placing the last vestiges of the explosive kiss on my lips. “Most days, you can barely hold a conversation. You’re feeling better, I take it?”

  I nodded, pulling him in for another round. I didn’t have much energy, but my body rallied for Jens.

  We were interrupted by a conversation making its way to us, so Jens pulled back, running his hands over his messy black hair as if mussed tresses were a dead giveaway of passion in the kitchen.

  “He wasn’t there. I’m telling you, you’ve never gone on a manhunt with a Huldra before. If he’d been at any of the places on the list, we would’ve found him.” It was Elsa, the leader of this Huldra coven who I alternated between hating and being cool with. I hadn’t seen her since before the mess, so I didn’t know what to make of her anymore. She stopped short when she rounded the corner with Leif and Foss, and saw me not holed up in my room like a recluse. “Well, if it isn’t my favorite Domslut. Little Lucy in the flesh. How is it you’re up and about?”

  I picked up my sandwich to show her what I’d been up to, taking a bite as I blinked up at her.

  “I thought I’d like you better silent, but this is testing my patience. Leif, could you at least teach her some more sign language? It’s been too long.”

  Leif nodded and stood on the other side of the counter, his friendly smile too genuine to be frustrated with. He walked me through the basics I’d already caught on to, having hung around him. Plus, I’d taken a semester of sign language at one of the high schools I’d been to.

  I participated in the lesson mostly for Jens. He was paying close attention to everything Leif did, treating the signs as if it was the only way he could communicate with me. We’d been doing just fine before Elsa’d shown up, but whatever.

  When Leif grasped my aptitude and Jens started asking for repeats and slowing down, I got up to make Jamie a couple sandwiches. I could feel Foss watching me. He gave me a wide berth, as did Leif and Elsa, as if they were afraid of breaking me if they got too close.

  I was determined not to be useless. I made Jamie two sandwiches, and a second one for me, though I couldn’t even visualize choking it down. I signed to Leif, asking if they had sealed bottled water. I knew Jamie wouldn’t risk anything else.

  “I’ll buy you that pink
unicorn you’ve always wanted if you can actually eat all those sandwiches,” Jens challenged me, leaning his elbows on the counter. “On second thought, don’t. I think Grace would quit if she had to clean up puke on top of everything else we’ve put her through.”

  I signed that they were for Jamie, which made Leif give me a slow applause to commend my efforts. Jamie had been pretty difficult for them.

  Jens went with me up the steps, carrying the tray and letting me lean on his elbow without any disparaging comments about how winded the small bit of exercise made me. Jamie’s room had been bolted three times from the outside with a barricade of a chair against the knob, as well. Jens moved the chair and unlocked the door while I warned Jamie I was coming in with Jens.

  Jamie was standing in the corner, fists at the ready in case… I’m not sure what he was expecting, but he let his arms drop when he saw me. Jamie stared at me with wild eyes and even crazier hair. Then he pounced. He didn’t mean to jump out at me so frantically, I’m sure, but I hadn’t been allowed to see him in a week.

  Jens intercepted Jamie, putting his hand to his friend’s chest to calm the bull. “I know you want to see her, and you can, but you have to be gentle.”

  The moment Jamie calmed down, Jens lowered his guard, and Jamie engulfed me in his arms. You’re okay? No one’s keeping you locked up?

  No, but I’ve been cooperating, which is more than I can say for you. I made you some lunch.

  Thanks! I’m so hungry, but I don’t trust the food.

  I snuggled into his burly chest. It’s alright. I’m here. I won’t let anyone poison us. We really are safe, Jamie. Eat something.

  Jamie plopped down on the bed and dug into the sandwiches I’d made, rolling his eyes at the comfort the simple meal delivered. He yanked me down next to him, making sure he had one hand affixed to me wherever he went.

  “You gotta know how frustrating it is that you two are talking to each other, but not to any of us,” Jens huffed, taking a seat on the only chair in the room. “If you could try to include other people, it’d make me feel a little better.”

  Tucker, Jamie thought to me as he chewed. We have to find Tucker and end him before he gets to us again.

  I signed Tucker’s name to Jens, and then pounded my fist into my palm, making my message of vindication clear.

  Jens sighed. “Believe me, I’m trying. I want to find Tuck just as much as you two. He has to answer for his part in all of it. But I’ve tried all his usual haunts, and he’s nowhere. And everyone thinks he’s dead, so no one’s any help in finding him.” He leaned back in the chair, trying to look relaxed, but I knew his planning face well. “There’s one other place he might be, but it’s too far away for me to feel comfortable leaving you two. Once you get back on your feet, I’ll go and finish it.” There was a shadow of shame that crossed over his face, and I regretted that Jens had to do the dirty work of disposing of his old friend.

  Jamie pounded his fist to his chest and shook his head. I’ll do it.

  Jens pushed enough of a smile onto his face to lighten the mood. “No. This is my job. Lucy’s my charge, so I neutralize the threats concerning her. Love the enthusiasm, brother, but you’re not ready to fight anyone. Focus on getting better.”

  Jamie glowered at Jens as he shoved the rest of the sandwich in his mouth. He picked up the second without thought of the taste. He was beginning to adopt my mantra of eat anything in sight to regain the weight and do whatever it took to get on with life.

  Twenty-Two.

  Too Much Cheese

  As the days passed, my mission was united with Jamie’s only inasmuch as I needed Linus’s ashes back (or his soul, if you wanted to get technical). I hadn’t explained my plan to Jens; he was still under the impression that my mom in my mind had been imagined. Though he couldn’t explain how we’d busted out of the lair, he couldn’t place his belief in dead people communicating with the living.

  He clearly hadn’t seen as many slasher movies about hauntings as I had.

  I stirred the eggs in the pan, adding extra cheese so Jamie would eat a healthy helping. We’d been doing much better in the week since Jamie had let me bring food to him. We’d been lifting weights together, doing calisthenics and had even progressed to slow jogs around the massive property the Huldras owned. Jamie hadn’t attacked anyone in over a week, and had earned the right to see his wife again.

  Britta sat at the counter, her fingers worrying the hem of her snug purple shirt as she waited for the eggs to be finished. Jamie was still asleep, otherwise I knew he’d be busting out of his room to get his hands on his wife.

  Britta was a cute pregnant woman. Her athletic build lent itself to her carrying the baby with little other changes to her body thus far. Though I’d spent an hour with her that morning, I couldn’t stop staring. I mean, girlfriend had barely peed on a stick last I’d seen her, and now she had the beginnings of a small, round swell and that pinch-your-cheeks glow about her.

  “That’s too much cheese,” Jens said, critiquing my cooking, as usual. He was such a control freak. It made me want to add more cheese just to show him his meddling didn’t do anything to change my mind.

  That’s how Jamie likes it, I signed, bumping him with my hip to get out of my way.

  He stepped his leg in front of me and edged me out with his butt. I swatted at his stellar backside, but it did little to move him. I huffed and watched as he added herbs that simply made the eggs far too busy to be comforting. As much as Jens was trying to annoy me, and kind of was, it felt good that he wasn’t afraid to touch me anymore. I was starting to look a little more like myself, though I knew I still had a ways to go. Britta hadn’t seen me except for that first night they’d found us, and her mournful eyes followed me wherever I went.

  I missed you, too, I signed to her, changing her pity to a warm smile.

  “I hated staying away when you needed me. Are you well? You look…”

  I wrapped my arms around her neck and pecked her cheek. I would get better. Pretty soon, it would be as if none of this ever happened. I was determined.

  When Jens finished with the omelet, I threw a fistful of cheese on top of it just to spite him. I grinned at his protesting groan. “Oh, come on! I had it perfect.”

  It didn’t matter how Jamie liked his omelet, really. Once he got an eyeful of Britta, he wouldn’t care about anything else.

  Britta held her brother’s hand as they followed me up the steps. Two knocks on the door roused my buddy from the bed. I made sure to keep my thoughts to myself when I strolled into the room, knowing that he should eat at least a few bites before his heart exploded all over creation. Hurry and eat. I’ve got a surprise for you, big brother.

  Jamie wolfed down half the omelet in one go. Thanks, syster. Did you use a whole brick of cheese on this? It’s… you’re a very good cook. His grimace told me he didn’t care for my cooking, but was trying to be kind. It was the one time I was grateful we weren’t speaking. Jens wouldn’t know he’d been right.

  I flicked his ear as I stood and opened the door, letting Jamie get an eyeful of the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen. His fork clattered to the plate, and as I’d predicted, the rest of the omelet was forgotten. I scooped up the plate as Jamie ran to Britta, kissing her with passion I could feel through our bond. I swooned as Jamie tried to tame the frenzy inside of him and only bless her face with gentle touches. I left the room with Jens as Britta sobbed with her husband at their long-awaited reunion.

  Jens and I went to my room for what he thought would be a simple hang-out while we worked-out. Now that Jamie was back on his feet, it was time to move forward. I sat on the bed next to my boyfriend, loving how well we fit next to each other.

  I pulled out a piece of paper and pen from the nightstand and set to work. I scribbled, “Tucker?” on the page and handed it to Jens.

  “I can go look for him in a few days, once I know Jamie’s under control around Britt.”

  I nodded, and then set to work exp
laining my mom’s last words to me before the hole in the brick wall was filled back in. Tucker ganked my vial that contained the ashes of my family, along with my twin brother’s soul. I told Jens where the body was buried and what we needed to do to get Linus back.

  When I finished, Jens read over the rant, his face falling with every line. He closed his eyes and crumpled up the page, pressing the wad to his forehead. “I thought you were getting so much better. I didn’t realize you were still… It’s okay. I’ll talk to Grace. See what she can do to help you.”

  I leaped off the bed when he tried to leave to find the nurse, moving between him and the door to block his exit. I’m not crazy! It’s real! It’s real!

  “I know, honey. It’s alright. Sure. It’s real. It’s all real.” He smoothed my hair out of my face and kissed my forehead in that patronizing sick patient way I wanted to punch him for.

  I don’t care if you believe me! I’ll take Jamie and do it myself!

  “Slow down. You know I can’t speak sign as fast as you can. Write it down.”

  I scribbled my message and underlined it twice to show I was doubly serious. My mother had been clear. Linus could live again, and I wouldn’t let that opportunity pass. I would fight anyone and anything to get my brother back, including Jens, if it came to that.

  “Whoa. You’re not going anywhere. And Jamie won’t leave Britta just like that. He only just got her back. Your mom died, sweetie. Two years ago, your mom and dad tried convincing the Mouthpiece to save Linus in exchange for their lives, and Pesta reneged. Your mother was taken into Be, and your dad was used to build part of a portal for the humans to enter Be through. Linus died, Loos. Linus is dead.” He swallowed hard as he looked deep into my eyes. “Any of this ringing a bell?”