I cast my gaze up at the grandfather clock pushed against the neutral wall and tell myself to leave, to give them what I came for and leave. It’s getting late and I have to leave to hold my promise to Isla and be home. I notice a pen sitting upon an open newspaper, a crossword going unfinished. While they comfort one another, I grab the pen and paper. Without permission, I scribble upon a blank piece and I don’t stop until I’m about to place the newspaper back down with the exact address of the compound.
“Give me a chance to leave, but you ring the police, you bring everyone you can and you light that place up,” I tell them this is a newfound urgency. “I have to get her ready to get out.” I stand, freezing momentarily. “And give this to someone, anyone who is dealing with finding Isla,” I reach into my pocket, pulling a piece of crumpled paper. I open it, spreading it out on the coffee table. “This is a name of all the girls who are still alive... girls who Isla has kept alive.”
“And the male names?” Isla’s father asks.
“Men who work for the El Salvador.” I met his gaze, he clearly took note that my name is not on there. “I’m not one of the bad guys. My sister was taken by them, I went to get her back.”
“So why aren’t you saving her? Why my Isla?” he persists to asks, his brow furrowing as he stands.
“Because I found out my sister died six months ago, and I fell in love with your daughter,” I say, offering a slight shrug. Losing my sister is hard, but finding Isla is something I still don’t quite believe myself. “I won’t lie, it’s not been a love story that’s drawn over months because it hasn’t been. I’ve known her weeks, but she’s an extraordinary person, but she needs more than me now. She needs you and her family back.”
“We’re getting her back?”
I nod my head. “I need to know you won’t treat her like she’s fragile,” I ask of them. “Please, whatever you do, do not treat her like she’s broken because that would kill her more. She wants her life back, but she knows it won’t be easy. She comes with a lot of demons now. Just don’t make her feel like they live with all of you as well.”
“We won’t,” her mother says, choking on a sob. “We just want her back home.”
“And you’ll have her,” I say, leaning down to pick up the bag by my feet. “I’m breaking so many rules, but take this... give this to Isla. It’s the least they owe her.” I pull the zip, forcing the back to open and show the money. “Keep this safe. This is only a little of what our boss owes her, but it’s all I could get for her.”
“Why o much money?”
“I wanted to extort the bastard before I went back for my girl,” I tell them, offering them such a self-assured grin. They’d be seeing me again, but next time I would have Isla. “Just do as I ask. It’s important you do this,” I say, hoping that my urgency isn’t in vain. “Your daughter saved me... it’s time I saved her, but I need your help for that to happen.”
That’s as simple as it gets.
She saved Gabi, she brought me back from the brink and now it’s time I repay her.
It’s time she got set free.
“Lover-boy and protector aren’t here, I see.”
Santiago’s voice bites at me and I cringe, turning to face him. I find him standing in the doorway, looking relaxed as he watches me.
“You look fucking hot in that dress,” he says, stepping into the room, closing the door behind him. “That sweater around your waist shows off that gorgeous figure of yours.”
I’d actually placed it around me because the cut on my ass was bleeding again, and this covered up the blood. It wasn’t for sensual effect, but because we aren’t given an abundance of clothing in this place. If it gets dirty, that’s tough, you carry on wearing it.
I gulp as I watch him coming further into the room.
“Why are you so frightened of me, Eighteen?” he asks, stepping closer to me. He gives me a smirk, it twisting on the side. “We used to have such fun together... before that Santos bastard arrived, anyway.”
Fun – is that what he calls it?
I take a step back with every step he takes toward me.
He keeps doing so, backing me against the wall until I can’t go any further. I’ve been kept away from any risk, hidden from any danger since Javier left last night, but now, Santiago strikes. He pins me in the corner, forcing my vulnerability on show. He loves when I’m shoved into a corner with no signs of an exit and I’m all his. I watch the gleeful intent as he reaches for me, grasping my chin in his hands and he pushes me further into the corner, crooning his head down at me.
“What I’d love to do to you, Isla,” he threatens.
“Then do it,” I tell him, daring him to strike.
He chuckles, chortling at me viciously.
“Don’t tempt me.”
“Leave the girl alone,” Hector’s voice booms into the room. “She’s not yours anymore, Santiago.”
Santiago’s laughter bursts into a louder octave as he falls away from me, releasing me.
“You touch her and World War three will be yours,” Hector threatens. “I’ll make sure of it.”
“You and Santos both thinking you’re some fucking army!” Santiago declares as he starts to leave. “You don’t scare me.”
Hector moves, slamming a foot down at Santiago, causing the boss’ son to jump. I stifle my laughter as Santiago takes his leave and leaves Hector and me alone.
“You okay?”
“I am now,” I start, pausing to bite my lip. “Thank you.”
“No thanks necessary, little lady,” Hector says, giving me a wink. “Wouldn’t be doing my job right if I didn’t stick by my word.”
“Regardless,” I say, stepping forward. “Thank you. I didn’t know what he was going to do.”
“All in a day’s work.” He gives me an almost vacant look, beside from the sparkle of mirth in his eyes. “Get some rest, he’ll be back soon.”
I give him a small smile.
Javier has done more than save me, he’s saved a man like Hector and all the girls that live here in fear.
“Isla.”
My name catches in the stagnant air of the room, breaking me free of my thoughts, and I steal my attention from the view out of the girls dorm window.
The moment my eyes lay on him, my breathing falters, near enough stopping and I’m quick to rush from my perch toward him
He wraps his arms so tightly around my body, catching me with ease, I sink into his embrace. The sound of his heart beating rapidly meets my ears and I have to pull away. Gone is the rhythmic beat, the one that has lulled me from insanity to sleep a few times. It tells me something is wrong.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” he tells me, giving me a grin. “I just rushed to get home. I couldn’t bear to be away from you anymore.”
He came back for me. Nothing else matters in comparison to that.
“I must be crazy for falling in love in a place like this, Isla, but you consume me like I do you.” His hands frame my face, cradling it with such a tender caress my eyes close. “It’s like our broken pieces matched and I don’t ever want to lose this feeling of completeness.”
Addicted.
That’s the keyword I would use for how I feel for him.
He’s a drop of heroin I want, I need. A dose of heroin I’d overdose on without a single regret.
I could never feel shame in allowing Javier to consume me and catapult my life as it has. Yes, he makes me feel complete, overwhelmingly so, but it feels more like a craving – the withdrawal is something unreal. The moment he’s back here with me, I feel like I can breathe.
“I needed you to come home to me,” I say, placing my forehead on his chest, gripping onto the collar of his shirt. There are no other words right now. “I hate how much I need you, Javier.”
“Your little heroin heart fell harder for me than you could for any drug offered to you.” He steps closer, a slow grin pulls at his lips, the pleasure of seeing me in one piece
graces his face. “I told you I was coming back for you.”
“And you did,” I say, grinning merrily at the thought. “You’re back, back here with me.”
“Not for long, though,” he states and fear ignites. “We’re leaving,” he breathes, his lips refusing to fully leave mine. “We’re going right now.”
“What?” I gasp, pushing him away.
He’s insane! He’s gone away and come back clinically insane. We aren’t leaving. That isn’t a choice he gets to make here. He knows that.
So why is he talking about such a crazy notion?
“We’re leaving now,” he tells me again, his voice harsher, but I can’t wrap my head around it. “I met your parents,” he admits, a half grin develops on his pink lips and he gives me a playfully cute look. “I didn’t go to save a cousin. He doesn’t even exist. I went to save you.”
“The money?”
“With you parents,” he states dryly. “I went to them, I told them where you are, I gave them everything they needed to know to get help for you and the other girls.” He comes closer, reaching out to take my hands. “You’re about to be free.”
I don’t react. Instead, I stare at him, trying to make sense of all that he is telling me, waiting for his entire charade to drop, for him to prove himself the devil’s advocate to me. Yet Javier remains the same man I watched from day one. He doesn’t morph or transform into a lesser man.
“You did this for me?” I ask, creasing my brow with my mounting astonishment. “You risked everything for me?”
“Well... why wouldn’t I?” he asks with a sense of confusion as to why I would ask such a thing. “I want my forever with you Isla Dougherty.”
He laughs as my face smothers with confusion – how does he know my surname?
“Hector gave me the minor details on who you are before I left. That’s why I left him here to look after you. In getting you free, he gets free, too. Albeit arrested, he’d plead guilty, hand over every piece of information he has to destroy Joaquín in order to get a reduced sentence. ” He releases one hand, to come and cradle my face. “We spoke about it... but never really planned for it. After what Santiago did you to yesterday, I had to get you out.”
I close my eyes, indulge in the tender feel of his palm on my cheek, enjoy the warmth it soothes back into me. Slowly, I open my eyes, finding him staring at me with sheer adoration.
“I can’t bear to watch you suffer and know I have no real control,” he says, pain lances into his voice, crippling every syllable. “It’s time I got you out of here, Isla. It’s time we made that start on our real love story. It’s time you started to dream of forever.”
It’s at this moment, him standing there before me I realize that we were more than what we both expected.
We were more than a love story.
We surpassed tales of love.
We transcended lust, or adoration, or even infatuation.
We were the sealant to the others broken pieces, the means to go on, the ray of hope we’d searched high and low for.
We weren’t made for forever because what we had in the present time wasn’t ready for the dreamer in us to start to believe in. We weren’t ready to seek passed securing safety and we reveled in it.
Simply put, we were salvation while we reveled here, but now he had secured our future.
“What do you say?” he asks me with a feather-light tone. “Are you ready to go home?”
“Yes,” I breathe, not really grasping what I’m saying until I repeat myself. “Yes.” My eyes light up, hope starting to breed and multiple, taking over the dread and fear. “We’re going home?”
“We’re going home.”
It’s with his affirmation that I realize I was one of the fortune ones. In a place where nothing blossoms, shrouded by too much darkness, our love bloomed as if it were seeking the shadows so our inner demons could play.
I knew what he was the very moment my eyes fell upon his blood soaked demeanor - sin and salvation thrown together in an imperfectly beautiful clash.
While he looked like the others, his eyes didn't look at me as if I were his next fuck. I wasn't a piece of ass to him. I wasn’t a puta. He was playing a totally different game. I didn't know what and I was only guessing, but Javier Santos was unlike any other cartel pledge and I couldn't wait to watch his plan unfold.
However, nowhere in my mind did I suspect he would be this courageous for a cartel girl.
Yet I wasn’t a cartel girl to him, was I? I was his cariño, I was Isla, I was Javier Santos’ one.
I allow myself to start to doubt my own self-pledged motto, we knew we weren't each other's for a lifetime, but I was more than happy to start doubting that – I really was. This, what we were reveling in, was purely temporary, but in the same instance, what we felt, this love we entrusted with each other was something I never wanted to lose the feeling of.
It felt lifelong, enduring, heaven-sent.
Maybe this was the perfect place to find your soul mate - when shadows chased you and fear was something you forgave yourself for feeling. Being with Javier was the safest place in the world for me.
“Do you need to pack anything?” he asks and I shake my head. There is nothing but reminders here, why would I take them with me? “Good, let’s go.”
He takes my hand, keeping it tightly locked with his as we go for the door. He opens it slowly, peering out before we leave the refuge of his bedroom. I cast a look back, that’s the last time I’ll go in there, the place we started our love story. This is the most bittersweet our story has been as we step across the threshold, not as man and puta, but as a fugitives.
We were now lovers making a run, preparing for our own great escape.
We rush through the corridors, mindful to keep a watchful eye of who could be coming around the corner. When we make it safely to the stairs, he goes down a few, but stops, turning back to face me.
“This is it,” he tells me a great smile illuminates his face. “This is it, Isla,” he repeats.
He grabs my face with a hurry, but the kiss he eases me into is gentle and unbidden. He kisses me with every ounce of nervous energy, addicting throb of love wrapping around him, and with all the courage he has.
This is our final kiss while we live locked here.
“You ready?” he asks, pulling away. I nod and it only makes his smile brighter. “Good... let’s go.”
We start back down the stairs and when we’re only a few steps from the bottom, I see the open doorway, my heart seizes as it sets to burst. Javier must feel the same as he makes his way for it, his steps short and quick. We reach the door, the Mexican heat radiating in and I start to allow myself to smile – this was it!
A gunshot sounds and Javier's motion stops all at once. As a sequence of events meant to happen, I follow him, stilling in my spot. I don’t dare look back, not when freedom is only four steps away.
There’s total silence as if the moment is suspended by the fear the noise of the bullet leaving its chamber created. I swallow hard and I tug on Javier’s arm, waiting for him to move.
But that’s when it starts.
The burst of crimson starts to ribbon and seep into his gray shirt, incarcerating my every hope and dream.
No.
The word doesn't fall audibly from my mouth. Instead, it echoes through the frozen abyss of my mind.
No.
No.
No.
"No!" I finally scream as Javier's knees give way and he starts to fall, breaking away from me.
I fall with him, landing heavily on my knees on the marble flooring, tugging on him and pulling him close. I take the sweater from around my waist, pushing it to his back before I push his body, forcing him to roll over and look at me.
He meets me with a wide-eyed expression, nothing could’ve prepared us both for this turn of events. I watch his eyes dart all over my face and he forces a smile. I can’t say a word, all of them futile in the back of my throat.
L
aughter cracks through the tense silence and I feel myself rage as I listen to the sinister cackle of Santiago. The noise is something I’ll never forget, but it’s something I can stop.
“Finally... the bastard is dead. Dream come true!” Santiago sneers, joyously. “Dream. Come. FUCKING. True.”
I reach over Javier, wrapping my fingers around the handle of the blade he had in his waistband. In a fit of anger, I charge, on my feet and running before any of us could truly realize and I take delight in advancing at him, blade out and ready to wound.
The wound isn’t quite a strong enough word for what I have planned.
I stab the knife into Santiago's chest - over and over and over again. I hear him exhale with every puncture I issue to his body but I don't stop. I can’t stop. I only take pleasure in the fact he’s not laughing anymore. The golden silence keeps me stabbing, keeps ramming that blade into his chest with murderous intent.
So this is overkill. This is what it feels like to become the crazy one, to finally break. This is what it feels like to get even.
As Santiago chokes on blood, I fall away, allowing the blade to fall from my hand, watching Santiago drop to his father’s feet.
I don’t move, waiting for my fate to be dealt my way, but Joaquín stands in absolute shock before me.
I look passed him, catching sight of something that breaks my heart a little more. My fatal intent weeps and breaks as I take in Hector’s body crumpled in the corner. He stares out, motionless and lifeless.
One more look at Joaquín tells me he poses no threat. His cartel now ends with him, but I don’t have the energy to pick up my knife and kill him.
So I start to fall away, backing up one step at a time so I can rush back to Javier, completely uncaring for Joaquín standing over his dead son. I just need one moment, one single second to say everything I never did.
“Javier,” I say, rocking him slightly. His eyes open, looking at me with a tiredness I know I can’t beat out of him. I reach out, not caring for the blood on my hands and captured his face in the same manner he had mine before. “We’re going home,” I say, struggling to hold in my tears. “This is it, Javier.”
Heroine Hearts: Darkness Made These Heroine Hearts Page 29
