by Kelly Long
Her heart pounded as she listened to herself. Honestly, she sounded like she was inviting him to a series of very interesting dates, but her teaching instincts were too well engaged to give up now. She’d teach him to read all right, and he’d remember it as a pleasant experience or she wasn’t the teacher she knew herself to be.
He smiled at her then. “I’d be willing to try, I guess.”
She resisted the urge to clap her hands like a little girl and gave a simple nod instead. “Gut, after the Christmas program.” She bit her lower lip.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. It’s just—that invitation I gave you. It was to the Christmas program. I know everybody always comes but I just wanted to—invite you especially. I mean, it’s part of wanting to share my work with you.”
“I’ll be there, front and center.”
“Danki.”
They turned into her lane. “Ach, Jacob, how will you get back?”
“The walk will do me good. I’ll put Ruler up and you go on in to your mamm.”
She hesitated, wanting to ask him in for lunch but not knowing what frame of mind her mother might be in. Still, he should probably get used to it.
“Lilly, go on. I understand about your mamm.”
She nodded and slipped from the buggy to make her way inside the house, closing the door behind her without looking back.
Jacob thumped his chest as he walked fast against the biting wind. He felt exhilarated inside, like the feeling he got when a new foal found its legs. He’d told the schoolteacher that he couldn’t read and she hadn’t batted so much as one professional eye. In fact, she’d made tutoring with her sound like a sensuous experience. Although, he could very well be putting more into her words than she’d meant. For all he could tell, Lilly did things with a calm logic, operating without the instincts he knew he had to rely on. Unless she got riled. He smiled as he thought of how blue her eyes were when she yelled. Blue like sea crystals.
“Jacob? Do you need a ride?”
He turned, so lost in his thoughts that he hadn’t even heard the buggy coming up behind him, and he now faced Sarah and Grant Williams. Sarah looked concerned and Grant’s smile was welcoming, but it was like someone had thrown a bucket of water over Jacob in the thick of the cold. He shook his head.
“Nee, danki. I’m fine. Just enjoying a bit of a walk.”
“You’re going to freeze,” Sarah said, her hazel eyes, so like his own, flashing green.
He resisted the familiar urge to study the beauty of her face. He started to hug his arms across his chest, but the pain in his arm stopped him. He felt he must look silly with one arm giving a feeble attempt at warmth, and stomping his feet.
“Jah.” He forced a smile. “I will if I keep standing here. Go on with the two of you now. I’m gut.”
“All right.” Grant lifted the reins. “Be seeing you—in about two days. Remember?”
“Sure.” Jacob recollected that the drain in his wound had to come out.
“Goodbye, Jacob.” Sarah turned a frowning face back to him and waved while he let the buggy get a good pace ahead.
He lifted his hand to wave back, then began walking again, but now he couldn’t recall what he’d been so happy about in the first place.
CHAPTER 13
The few weeks until the Christmas program passed in a flurry of activity inside the little school. Lilly had each student painstakingly make out an invitation to friends and family as she tried to ignore the excitement of Jacob’s response to her own private invitation. She wasn’t quite sure why his words were like a secret of delight that she treasured. They’d seen each other several times before the program, of course, deciding on a simple wedding with few guests. As was customary, Jacob delivered the invitations in person, while Lilly concentrated on her mother and all of the preparations for the day. But she couldn’t fully focus on the wedding until the school program was past, so instead, she concentrated on last-minute rehearsals and the children’s favorite—decorating the classroom.
The class quilt had been completed by several of the mothers and was strung in a delightful display across two windows on a piece of clothesline. The winter sunlight penetrated the thin quilt and made the vibrant colors and images stand out in vivid hues. Lilly had hand-stitched each student’s first name on his or her particular square and knew that the parents, or at least the mothers of the community, would be pleased by the fine work of the students.
“How’s this, Miss Lapp?” Reuben Mast held up a paper chain of red and green construction paper, while his paste-dabbed nose and cuffs gave evidence of his hard work.
Lilly smiled. “It’s beautiful. Your mamm will love it.”
“Jah. But—”
“Yes,” Lilly interjected. “Use yes.”
Reuben sighed. “Yes, but my daed’s—my dad’s—not likely to ’ppreciate all this decorating. ‘Women’s work’ he would call it. That’s what he said about the quilt square when I told him.”
Some of the students laughed.
“I see, well, I’d like you all to know that decorating and making a community quilt are not just ‘women’s work.’ It’s art. And many of our greatest artists, even Amish artists, are men.”
“No way,” Reuben burst out.
“Jah. I mean, yes. They are.”
“Like who?”
The whole class was listening now, and Reuben puffed out his fifth-grade chest with pride at having caught the ears of everyone in the room. Lilly enjoyed the moments when the younger students could be heard, so she chose to extend the discussion.
“Well, you’ve all seen the fine leatherwork that Amish men do during the winter to sell at spring festivals—the saddles, satchels, belts, and such. All of that could be called ‘sewing’ by some, but it’s really art.”
“That ain’t art.” John Zook interjected his voice, strident with adolescence.
“Isn’t, John, and yes it is art. Don’t you find that leatherwork is interesting to look at? The design details are inspiring and make you think that what you see is more than just a piece of cowhide.”
The youth considered. “Ye-es, I guess so. But why care about art that men make anyway? Isn’t Derr Herr the best artist at nature and stuff, like the bishop says at Meeting sometimes?”
Lilly felt the thrill she always did when a student pushed back, stretching and thinking on his or her own. “You’re right, John, of course. But He has blessed us as well that we can create beauty with purpose, like the intricate belt that still holds up a man’s pants.”
Lucy Stolis raised her hand. “Well, what about women’s art, Miss Lapp?”
“What about it? Don’t women do quilting and gardening and sewing which results in beauty with a function?”
Lucy frowned. “I guess, but it seems more like the women’s art is work.”
John grinned at her. “Like it should be.”
“John,” Lilly admonished. “No, Lucy, a woman’s work is different from a man’s, but you know that both must work very hard to make a happy home, right?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Good! Then let’s get this room decorated artistically for the purpose of giving our guests tomorrow a wunderbaar program.”
Jacob had the vague idea that it might be nice if the kitchen floor would open up its fine grooved planks and swallow him whole. He’d come in from the stables for lunch, only to discover Mrs. Zook and Kate sitting down to a cup of tea with his mamm. He’d tried to back out, but his mother seemed oblivious to his silent plea. He had a sudden notion who Seth took after.
“Ladies.” He hung up his coat and hat on pegs behind the door and made his way to the coffeepot.
“Jacob,” his mamm urged. “Come and join us. We were just talking about the Christmas program—and the wedding, of course.”
Great, he thought. Of course, he’d had to invite the Zooks to the wedding since Lilly had wanted the whole of her class to attend—and the younger Zook children were some of h
er favorite students. Nothing like their big schweschder, he considered. He was not comfortable with the predator-like intensity of Kate’s gaze when he slid onto the bench, but that was youth at nineteen. He remembered it. You had the irrational belief that you could have anyone, anything, if you just wanted it bad enough.
“So, you’ll be attending the program, Jacob?” Mrs. Zook’s tone was as casual as a mother rattler’s.
He blew on his coffee before answering. “Yes, ma’am. That’s my plan.”
“Wunderbaar. I wanted to thank you too, Jacob, for bringing Kate home the other night. She most likely would have frozen without your care.” As though it were an afterthought, she added, “You’ll have to take her riding again sometime soon.”
Jacob chafed under how the words sounded and resisted the urge to reiterate his announced and impending wedding. He shot a sidelong glance at his mother who looked back with a blank expression. Definitely Seth’s mamm, he thought. But he had sidestepped determined girls for years while he’d been waiting for Sarah. He pinned both Kate and Mrs. Zook with an imperturbable gaze.
“Well, while I, as a soon-to-be married man, cannot have the pleasure of Kate’s company, there is someone who might. You see—I haven’t wanted to nose it about the community . . .” He spoke in a conspiratorial whisper so that the Zook women leaned in like frogs to a fly. “But I’ve made a promise to my brother. You see, he’s incredibly lonely, a tortured soul you might say, and I’ve promised to try and help him find a love of his own, so maybe he could take Kate for a drive sometime.”
“Seth Wyse?” Mrs. Zook snorted. “The boy’s at every gathering there is. Why I’ve seen him with as many girls on his arm as I’ve seen—”
Jacob shook his head in sober consideration. “All a front, Mrs. Zook. A sad, sad front.”
“Is this true, Mary Wyse?” Mrs. Zook’s considerable bosom heaved beneath her blouse.
Mamm stared into her teacup. “I cannot say what goes on between these two boys; they’re best friends.”
“Never mind Seth. You’re not even married yet,” Kate wailed.
Mrs. Zook looked with horror at her daughter, and Jacob choked on a laugh. It was one thing to allude to your desires and quite another to expose them to the full light of day.
He caught Kate’s eye. “I’m sorry, Miss Zook, but I must honor my bride-to-be—and my brother.”
Kate gave him a sour look. “Bride-to-be, huh! Everyone’s suspicious of why you’re really marrying her, why I know—”
“Kate!” Again, Mrs. Zook could not contain herself and Jacob ignored the curious feeling of anger at the younger girl’s barb against Lilly.
“We’d best be leaving,” Mrs. Zook said, sidling from the table and giving Kate a firm shake on the shoulder. The girl rose with reluctance but hadn’t lost her determined eye, which made Jacob wary. Still, he saw them to the door with his mother, then waited for his mamm’s response to the whole conversation. To his surprise, she just hummed and went about clearing up the dishes.
“Not going to lecture me about setting up Seth?” he asked, depositing cups in the sink.
“Nee, did you? I thought you might have been telling the truth; Seth is such a—how did you put it—tortured soul?”
“Mamm,” he groaned. “I’m engaged and that girl is desperate! And besides, I promised—” He broke off, and now his mother looked very interested.
“Promised what?”
“Nothing.”
“Promised who?”
“Mamm,” he exclaimed, exasperated.
She lowered her gaze to the table as she wiped. “Ach, I’m sorry, Jacob. I don’t mean to intrude.”
“Jah, you do, but I love you for it.” He put his arm around her shoulders. “I especially promised Lilly I’d be there.”
“But you usually go—though I doubt you’ve paid much attention standing outside with the young men.”
“Well, this year will be different.”
“Ach, I see.”
He eyed her with suspicion. “There’s nothing to see, Mamm. She’ll be my wife in three days’ time.”
His mother smiled up at him. “Indeed she will, Jacob. Indeed, she will.”
CHAPTER 14
O n the morning of the program, Lilly hurried through her routine and prayed her mother would be cooperative. Lilly had reminded her of the program the night before but had gotten no response, so she knocked with faint trepidation on her mamm’s door, surprised that she hadn’t been summoned already. When her mother didn’t respond, Lilly opened the door.
“Mamm?”
She peered into the shadows and saw that the bed was made, an unusual thing since it was her responsibility to make up her mother’s bed after school each day. Her heart started to pound and she tried not to panic. Of course her mother could be anywhere about, but Lilly recalled the one other time that she’d been gone before dawn—she had driven into Lockport and had indulged in her desire to buy things, spending their meager savings before Lilly had been able to find her.
“Ach, not today, dear Lord,” she breathed aloud as she began to methodically search the house.
“Mamm? Mamm?” Her pleading calls received no response and she flung her book satchel on the kitchen table before heading out to the barn. She saw, before she ever got there, that the wide doors gaped open and Ruler and the buggy were gone. She glanced at her brooch watch. School was to begin in half an hour. She caught at the railing next to the porch steps and tried to regulate her breathing. She might have gone to the Planks’, but she knew that Alice and her family had been gone for a few days visiting an ailing aunt in another county and weren’t due to return until the afternoon.
“Think, Lilly Lapp. Think.” Her words were caught by the cold wind as one face came to mind. Jacob. Somehow she knew by instinct that he’d help her and would be discreet in doing so, and not just because he was her betrothed, but because he was that kind of person.
The thought warmed her as she raced back inside, caught up her books, pulled on an extra wrap, and began the mile-and-a-half run to the Wyses’ farm. She slipped twice, falling hard against the icy ground, but got back up, propelled by worry for her mother and what the children would do if she weren’t there to greet them.
She arrived panting at the Wyse door and pounded with an ice-cold hand. Samuel Wyse opened the door.
“Lilly, what is it?” He took her satchel of books.
She shook her head, trying to get her breath. “Jacob, sei so gut.”
Both Jacob and Seth had risen from the kitchen table when she entered and now bumped into each other in an effort to come to her. She saw Jacob glare at his brother and Seth step back. Then Jacob came forward to catch her shaking arms in his hands.
“What’s wrong?”
Her bottom lip quivered at the concern in his tone but she kept stalwart focus. “My mamm . . . Ruler’s gone. I think she went to town, but I can’t be sure. I’m going to be late for school and the children will be cold.” She broke off, stifling a half sob. He ran his large hands up and down the cold wraps on her arms.
“It’s all right, Lilly. We’ll help you. I’ll find your mamm.”
He pulled her against his broad chest and she listened for a few intense seconds to the steady beating of his heart. Remembering that his family stood about, she moved away. He let her go. She looked at the faces of the Wyse men and Mary Wyse, who’d come in from the kitchen, but saw nothing but concern in their eyes. She thanked God for bringing Jacob to mind.
“Mamm, will you make some hot tea for Lilly?”
Lilly shook her head. “Oh, I can’t, Jacob—the children.”
He waved at her to be silent.
“Seth, go over to the school and get the woodstove going. Tell the kids to come in when they get there and have them run through their practice for the program. Then come back and get Lilly, please, once she’s had a chance to warm up. I’ll take Thunder and ride into town to find Mrs. Lapp.”
“I’ll search
the other areas nearby, son.” Samuel pulled on his overcoat and left as everyone was galvanized into action with Jacob’s words.
“Don’t worry, Lilly.” Mary Wyse stood by her side.
“Danki, all of you,” Lilly whispered.
“Come, child. Take your wraps off for a minute to warm up.”
Lilly obeyed, then startled at Mary’s sudden cry.
“Lilly! Your arms are bleeding through your blouse.”
Jacob got up from where he was putting on his boots. He caught Lilly’s right forearm and turned it over with gentle firmness. Her blood made bright red stains through the snow-white of her sleeves around her wrists and forearms.
“Did you fall?”
She nodded. “Twice.”
He frowned, looking angry, though she wasn’t sure why.
“It’s nothing,” she assured him, but he was rolling back her cuffs to expose the abrasions made from landing on the ice. He grunted, then pulled her by the hand over to the pitcher of water on the table.
“Mamm!” he bellowed.
“Jacob, honestly, I’m right here. I’ll take care of her arms. You’re just going to upset her more.”
Lilly knew he was staring at her but couldn’t return his gaze for more than a second. She felt stupid and clumsy and very cold. But she melted inside when he lifted her chin with warm fingers. “I’ll find your mamm, Lilly. Don’t worry.”
She swallowed and nodded. “I know you will. Danki, Jacob.”
He stalked out the door with Seth at his heels, and the kitchen was quiet.
Mary Wyse urged her to sit down as she brought strips of linen to clean and bandage her arms.
“Danki, Mrs. Wyse. I appreciate your care.”
“Call me Mamm, and nee, thank you.”
She looked up in surprise to meet the woman’s warm smile. “For what?”
“For waking up my son.”
Lilly wrinkled her brow in confusion as a vivid image of her shaking Jacob’s shoulder while he slept crossed her mind. “I . . . don’t understand.”
