To Live Again

by Melody Dawn

  Then he tells me that Jayson asked what she was referring to and that he told him he needed to talk to me. I realize that he knows; I’m just not sure how much. Seeing the questioning look on my face, he says, “Chloe, don’t be mad, but Madison told me everything. I basically made her so if you’re angry, then direct it at me. I had to know what I was dealing with and now that Alyssa knows, it’s best that I know the situation. You know she is going to try and tell Jayson. And we have to put a stop to that; the best way to stop her in her tracks is for you to tell him yourself. When I told him he needed to talk to you, he said he was going to come and get you tomorrow.”

  I almost fall out of the chair when I hear those words. “Why would he do that, Connor? He says he hates me.”

  With a sigh, he says, “You know better than that, Chloe. His pride was bruised and he was hurt because he’s so fucking in love with you. I’m not going to lie to you and tell you that all is forgiven and everything will be perfect from now on. But, the main thing is that he wanted to come and get you. J is smart; I knew he would come to his senses. I decided to surprise him and come and get you myself. Even Madison doesn’t know where I am.”

  My heart is so full of happiness, I want to do a celebration dance like football players do when they make a touchdown. But, I restrain myself; barely.

  “Ok, what are we waiting on? Let me get my things so we can go.”

  Connor looks at me seriously and says, “Wait, Chloe. We need to talk about Alyssa. Is there any way that she might have overheard you and Madison talking about what happened?”

  I think about it and tell him that I really don’t know how she could have; we never discussed it outside of the apartment that I could remember. The only other thing I can think of is that she googled my name and I know she has a lot of family money; she may have hired a private investigator.

  With a worried frown, Connor says, “Chloe that is not normal behavior. Even if she and Jayson were a real couple, which they weren’t; what she is doing is bordering on stalking. I don’t think you or Madison should stay at your apartment. Are you ok to stay at our house? I don’t know how Jayson is going to react, but I can’t see him wanting you around her. I think it would be for the best.”

  I tell him that I can handle it even if Jayson isn’t thrilled about me being there.

  No matter what, I make a pact with myself that I will do everything in my power to make him want me with him again.

  Obviously ready to go, he says, “Ok woman, get your shit together and let’s hit the road!”

  Shaking my head and laughing, I think to myself that there could only be one Connor Reece and I swear he could make one of the Buckingham Guards smile with his antics. Not wanting to keep him waiting, I gather my stuff together and go downstairs to check out. While I’m waiting for my receipt, Connor loads his truck. I walk out to his truck and then remember that my car is there. I remind him that I drove and I will need to drive back as I can’t leave my car there. He tells me he will be right back and I wait outside once again staring at the water. What a difference a few days makes!

  Connor comes back out and says, “I spoke to the owner and told him of your situation with a possible stalker. He gave me the address of a long term parking garage not far from here. He has also agreed not to tell anyone that you have left the hotel. If Alyssa really does have a PI, then I want him to be confused as to where you are.”

  I feel a chill go through me at his words. “Connor, you’re scaring me. Don’t you think she is just being a jealous hag?”

  He shakes his head and says, “At first, I did. But now that she has dug into your past, I think she’s crazy. Maybe I’m going overboard, but I would rather keep you out of her way.”

  I realize that he is right and follow him in my car to the parking garage. He has me park away from the opening where my car isn’t readily seen. Then, grabbing my ticket from the automated machine and putting it on my dashboard, I close my car up and we get ready to leave.

  Once, we’re on the road, I tell him, “I’m so freaking hungry; I’ve been living on Ramen Noodles and peanut butter sandwiches.”

  Connor looks sufficiently grossed out and wants to know what I want to eat. We decide to go to Taco Bell and I load up on a ton of greasy yummy food. He tells me I’m going to be sick and it better not be in his truck. I tell him to just shut up and let me eat. It’s funny because we actually do sound like brother and sister. I guess it was meant to be.

  The closer we get to Houston, the antsier I get.

  Connor looks over at me and asks, “Girl, do you need to pee or something?”

  I throw some ice from my cup at him and he tells me not to damage the goods. In turn, I tell him he has no goods and I get a very dirty look. Becoming more serious, I tell him that I’m scared of seeing Jayson’s reaction to me being there. He assures me that it will be ok and I decide that I have to listen to him or I’m going to make myself crazy. He also lets me know that Jayson won’t be home until later since he is working. I can’t help but be relieved because it will give me time to make myself presentable before he sees me.

  We pull up into the Reece driveway and I see Madison’s car is there. I’m so excited to see my best friend; I hope she will feel the same way. Connor unlocks the door and I walk in behind him.

  Madison is curled up on the couch watching the Food Network and she looks over and says, “Hey, I tried to call you, where have you been?”

  He moves out of my way and she sees me for the first time. We stare at each other for a moment before she runs to me and just like no time has passed, we are hugging and crying. And then the apologizing starts. Both of us are trying to get out how sorry we are to hurt the other one, which makes the crying even worse.

  Of course, Connor has to take this moment to ask, “Are you two going to kiss and make up because I can get on board with that.”

  With twin eye rolls, we tell him he’s a pervert, but I’m thankful to him because he lightened the mood. I can tell he knows what I’m thinking because he gives me a wink.

  I realize then that Madison has not told me about her and Connor.

  I punch her in the arm and ask, “What do you have to say for yourself, missy?”

  She looks worried and I tell her how happy I am for the both of them and I give her the same warning about not screwing it up. When I tell her about the fact that I now have a brother, she bursts into tears. Geez, she has been so emotional about everything lately!

  Seeing that it’s getting late into the evening, I ask Connor what time Jayson is getting off of work. He tells me 11:00 p.m. unless something happens and he has to stay. It is 9:15 p.m. right now and I tell them that I want to get a shower before he comes home. I kiss Madison good night and she whispers for me not to forget to shave everything and I wink and say ok. Then I give Connor a hug and thank him for everything he has done for me tonight. Finally, I go upstairs to get ready for what seems like the most important night of my life.

  I get into Jayson’s shower and I immediately start to relax being surrounded by his smell. I love the way he smells, the body wash he uses, and the scent that is just him. It’s just sexy; that’s the only way to put it. I stand there and sniff his body wash and decide I’m using it. If he gets here and decides he wants me to sleep in another room, at least I will have his scent with me to comfort me.

  As I wash my hair and then my body, I feel sensitized all over. I make sure to shave everywhere, hoping there will be a reason for it tonight. I remember the bath Jayson gave me and now I’m completely turned on. I hope he gets here soon. I know I shouldn’t get ahead of myself because I don’t know what his reaction will be. So, I shut down the sexy thoughts and get out of the shower.

  After drying off, I snag another one of his t-shirts and wash my face and brush my teeth. I can’t decide whether to put on panties or not and with a moment of bravery, I leave them off. Finally, I brush out my hair and blow dry it so I don’t look like Medusa, which is what happens if it air
dries. I brush my teeth one more time, just to be sure, and walk back to his room to get in bed and wait.

  Before lying down, I turn the bathroom light on, but close the door so only a small sliver of light is showing in the room. I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I know, the bed dips and I feel something I thought I would never feel again. I feel Jayson’s arms go around my waist and I turn towards him and put my head on his shoulder. Neither of us says anything and I try not to cry, but I’m unable to keep the tears away. I cry into his chest and he just holds me, never saying a word.

  I crawl over on top of him and wrap my arms around his neck and my legs around his hips. I’m still crying and I start apologizing and trying to explain why I did what I did. He still doesn’t say anything; he just pushes up my shirt and strokes my back up and down with his big hands. I feel so comfortable, but at the same time, turned on. And it feels like I’m not the only one. But I know it’s not the night for that. We need to heal emotionally before we go any further physically.

  I finally get ahold of myself and the crying turns to just sniffs and whimpers. He holds me tighter and whispers to me that he never thought he would feel this feeling again. I raise my head and although I can barely see his beautiful face, I try to, because I want to know what he is feeling.

  While still stroking my back, he stares in to my eyes and says, “I never thought I would feel at peace again. I felt like I was going to burst in two when I left you in Galveston. And I resigned myself to the fact that I would always feel that gut-wrenching pain for the rest of my life. You’re everything to me and knowing I have you back gives me the peace I would have searched for forever.”

  At the end of his speech, he takes my lips in the most delicious kiss I’ve ever known. One thing Jayson Reece can do is kiss; immediately I feel myself responding. I’m whimpering into his mouth and he is pushing me down on his cock. There’s so much want and need between the two of us; I don’t know how we don’t combust.

  He finally pulls away and says, “I want you more than anything, Chloe, but I also know we need to talk first.”

  I shake my head in agreement because I know that he’s right. He pulls me down for another mind-altering kiss and I open my lips to him and his tongue glides in. It’s hot and wet and we kiss until I can’t breathe anymore.

  We both lie there breathing hard and he whispers in my ear. “We are going to talk tomorrow and then tomorrow night, I’m going to have you. I’m going to take your virginity and you’re going to be mine forever. For the first time, I’m going to slowly slide my cock into your wet pussy. And just like anything good in life, it may hurt a little bit, but the pain will disappear and then I’m going to make love to you in the way you deserve.”

  Just when I think he is finished, he squeezes my ass and says, “Once you’re recovered, I’m going to spank your ass for everything that’s happened, but don’t worry, I’ll make you come and you will want to piss me off on purpose in the future.”

  I don’t make a sound except to whimper because I’m so turned on, I’m actually in pain.

  He continues by saying, “Then, I’m going to take you into the bathroom and give you the kind of bath that I know you love. And, if your pussy isn’t too sore, we are going to take a shower together and I’m going to fuck you until we both can’t come anymore.”

  Actually, I think I’m going to come right now if he says another dirty word in that growly voice he’s using.

  “Do you have any questions?”

  I say yes, and look at him very seriously, “Is it tomorrow yet?”

  He lets out a laugh and I can hear how happy he is. He doesn’t know it, but he has made me the happiest I have ever been in my whole life. I wrap myself around him again and think to myself that Jayson Matthew Reece is mine and no matter what tomorrow brings, I’m holding on and never letting go.

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Chloe

  I wake up to the feeling of someone playing with my hair. And, for a moment, I freak out. I’ve been sleeping so hard, I’m disoriented, and I forget that I’m no longer in Galveston. Until, I feel something hard against my ass and then I know exactly where I am. I’m in bed with the sexiest man in the world and it feels like he is very happy that I’m here with him, too.

  I turn over to ask him what the time is and before I can say anything, his mouth is on mine. Any question I had just flew out of my head. He keeps kissing me like it’s our last day on earth. I get the feeling we aren’t waiting until tomorrow for him to hear my story.

  Wondering if I should stop him and remind him of our last conversation, I start to pull back and he just pulls me closer. Oh hell, I’m not going to even try to pretend I want to stop and talk.

  He pulls my t-shirt over my head and I suck in a breath. This is really happening! I tell myself that if I start freaking out, I’m going to kick my own ass. As if he can tell my inner turmoil, he pulls back and looks into my eyes. Neither of us are saying anything. I know he is giving me the option to stop or continue. Instead of answering him verbally, I just reach down and start to tug at his sleep pants. He helps me pull them off and suddenly I am faced with a very large and aroused man.

  I tell myself to get it together…I’ve seen him before…and I know exactly how big he is. But, I wasn’t concerned at the time because I knew we weren’t going to have sex. The light from the bathroom shines into the room and he can see the worry on my face.

  He cups my cheek and says, “You know I’ll never hurt you, princess.”

  My voice wobbles a little and I say, “Yes, you will. There’s no way you’re going to fit inside me and not hurt me.”

  He pulls me down into what I call “our position” and says, “I can’t say it’s not going to hurt at all. But, I will do everything in my power to make it as painless as possible. Don’t build it up in your mind. Let’s see if I can take your mind off of it. When I’m done, if you’re still worried, we will stop.”

  Looking up at him, I ask, “What about waiting until you hear my story?”

  He is quiet for a moment and then hugs me. The next thing he says makes me want to shackle him to me for life!

  “I was wrong to ever say that. I don’t care about your story. You’re mine, no matter what has happened to you, and no matter what you think you’ve done, nothing is changing the fact that I’m not ever letting you go again.”

  I know then that I don’t care about a little pain; I want this man as close to me as humanly possible.

  With my thoughts evidently showing on my face, Jayson leans down and kisses me. And, it feels different this time. He is always sweet, but this time I could feel the restrained possessiveness in his kiss. I need to feel that possession. When you are deprived of love and physical touch, getting it is like an addict taking a hit. At this moment, I would do anything to have him take over my body. I pull him closer to me, bury my fingers in his hair, and pull his bottom lip into my mouth, biting it. It’s like freeing a prisoner from a long time jail sentence and I crave every minute of it.

  All of a sudden, Jayson pulls my arms over my head, securing them with his hand, and I feel so owned. This is what I want, what I need from him.

  He gets closer to me and I think he is going to kiss me again, but instead he stares into my face and says, “Don’t, Chloe.” I look at him in surprise and he says, “Don’t do that again.” I can see the conflict on his face and he says, “You make me feel things I’ve never felt before. I don’t want to hurt you.”

  I pull one of my hands from his and run my fingers over his gorgeous lips and say, “I’ve told you before; you could never hurt me. Not even when you tried in Galveston.”

  He looks away and I feel like shit for reminding him. But, I need him to know that I trust him implicitly and he needs to trust himself.

  Shaking his head, he says, “I’m fucking this up. I feel like I’m the virgin.”

  At that, we both laugh, and it lightens the mood.

  Then he looks at me serious
ly and says, “In a way, I am. I’ve always just fucked before. I’ve never made love to a woman because I’ve never felt like this about anyone. The love I feel for you almost scares me because you own me.” Tears start to fill my eyes and he says, “No crying, baby.” Of course, that just brings them on even heavier.

  He begins wiping the tears away and says, “Turn over.”

  I do it immediately and he straddles my hips without putting his full weight on me. He begins massaging my neck and shoulders. Every few strokes, he moves up to my head and massages me there as well. I start to feel like a limp noodle...but, a very turned on limp noodle.

  I start to tell him that I want him to love me now, but he just gives my shoulders a squeeze and slides further down my body. He begins massaging my ass and I feel like I’m on fire. I just thought I felt like an addict when he was touching me before. Who in the hell knew getting your butt massaged was such a turn-on? Or maybe I’m just a freak. I’ll worry about it later. If I’m a weirdo, I’ll just add it to my long list for therapy later.

  I know he can hear the whimpers coming out of my mouth the more he massages me.

  Learning down, he whispers in my ear in that growly voice he has when he’s turned on. “Do you like this, princess?” Without waiting for an answer, he says, “You’re sensitive here. Did you know that the ass has a large amount of nerve endings?” I want to laugh at his medical evaluation, but I’m scared he might stop. He says, “That’s why people like to be spanked. I think we’re going to have some fun with that.”

  I push my hips into the mattress needing relief and I hear him laugh quietly. It looks like dirty Jayson has come out to play and I’m not saying anything that might make him stop.

  I feel the mattress move and I turn my head to see him standing behind me. He looks so beautiful. The bathroom light shines enough that I can see the heat in his gorgeous green eyes that always make me melt. I decide that playtime is over with and try to get up so I can have some fun of my own.