Make Me Want (Men of Gold Mountain)

by Rebecca Brooks

  She couldn’t let that cloud her judgment. Even when he stopped talking mid-sentence, smiled, and leaned over to kiss her. Just because.

  Things had gotten out of hand one night because she didn’t know any better and another night because, even though she did know better, she’d been stuck so close to him, and she wasn’t superwoman. How could she have been expected to resist?

  But when they packed up and continued their walk along the ridge, Abbi began to wonder if maybe something had changed. Maybe there really was something happening here.

  He smiled when she pointed out different nests and asked questions about erosion on the mountainsides—a problem that would worsen if more trees were stripped away. For the first time, it felt like he was listening when she outlined the reasons for opposing the break and the angles the Forest Services had conveniently overlooked.

  She didn’t want to get ahead of herself. But there was no reason he couldn’t go back to Walker and Chip and say that after further study, he’d concluded that the firebreak wasn’t going to be effective enough to offset the costs of implementation.

  He wouldn’t just be doing it for her. He’d be doing it because it was right.

  No one who’d surveyed the land so carefully could possibly determine that a firebreak was a necessity here.

  And no one who kissed her that way, up against the hood of his truck when they returned, could turn around Monday morning and tell her she’d been wrong.

  …

  A hot shower after a night in the backcountry—under normal circumstances, Tyler would have described it as the greatest pleasure in the world. Better than real food. Clean clothes.

  Better than sex.

  But that was before he’d had sex with Abbi. Was anything better than sex with Abbi? He frowned and turned off the water. Just because he knew the answer didn’t mean he should be thinking it. It was way too much and way too soon.

  You mean more like way too good, he thought. Because wasn’t that the problem?

  After a hard two days of hiking and a night sleeping on the ground, he wanted nothing more than to twist the cap off a cold beer and sink into the couch. But he didn’t have any beer in the house, just whiskey. Whiskey was what Scott would have wanted after a weekend on the trail, and it made him feel like Scott was there to hear the ice crackle as he poured.

  And no matter how much it hurt to think of Scotty, it was better than not thinking of him. Tyler wasn’t going to be the kind of shithead who could let his friend die and just move on.

  Which meant he wasn’t going to be the kind of shithead who got caught up in the first woman he met and forgot everything else in his life.

  He couldn’t afford to be distracted. Not when he had a job on the line. Not when Scott would never have another beautiful view or beautiful woman to drink to ever again.

  But telling himself not to think about Abbi wound up being just another way to think about her. Abbi getting out of the shower with him. Abbi’s skin wet and warm.

  He’d lick the water from between her breasts. Lift her against the bathroom mirror. The shower wall. Carry her to the bedroom, dripping water down the hall.

  Abbi wouldn’t care about the mess. Abbi would dig her fingers in his wet hair and pull.

  Fuck, what was wrong with him? He stopped hunting through the fridge for something to take the edge off the whiskey and reached for the phone. Without Scott, there was only one man who could talk any sense into him.

  “Tyler, you’re alive!” Aidan picked up right away.

  Despite himself, Tyler smiled. “I told you I’d be fine up here.”

  “You’re a million miles from palm trees. How is that fine?”

  “Fir trees,” Tyler said. “They’re not half bad.”

  “If you say so.” Aidan paused, then got down to it. “So, what’s going on?”

  It was a simple question. But Tyler heard the edge in Aidan’s voice, the concern he must have felt as soon as he saw who was calling. Enough shooting the shit, Aidan seemed to be saying. Tell me what’s wrong.

  Tyler shouldn’t have called. He didn’t want to give Aidan any more reason to worry. He wanted to laugh and say, “Nothing, man. What’s up with you?”

  But Aidan knew him too well to fall for that act.

  After Tyler finished training and Aidan took him on his first live run, Tyler hadn’t had anyone to go home to. He’d hung out at the fire station in his sweat-stained, sooty work clothes, unsure what to do with himself, until Aidan popped out of his office and demanded he come over, shower, and have dinner with his family.

  And here was Aidan, still. Picking up the phone on a Sunday night and asking Tyler what he needed help with.

  “It’s this firebreak,” he said, sinking into the sofa. Whoever owned this place had quite the sense of style—the cushions were a dark plaid that wasn’t doing any favors for the room.

  “I thought the permits were all set and you were just going to supervise and move on,” Aidan said.

  “It might not be so easy,” he admitted.

  “Are you having trouble?”

  “No,” Tyler said quickly. He definitely shouldn’t have called. What if the real problem was that Tyler couldn’t handle the pressure anymore? Now Aidan would know for sure how inept he’d become, and Tyler would never be able to get a reference for another job again. “It’s not trouble, exactly. But there’s this naturalist—”

  Aidan made a noise. “One of those?”

  “Sort of.” Tyler paused. “I guess it’s gotten complicated.” But he didn’t explain how.

  “Look, Ty, you’ve dealt with this before. There’s always someone who hears ‘bulldozer’ and thinks you’re chopping down a fuckload of trees for no reason. As long as you’ve got state approval, you’re in the clear. Remind them of the benefits, say the Forest Service wants it, and then, honestly, man? Sometimes you have to let it go.”

  Aidan was big on letting things go.

  Even things that shouldn’t be let go of. Not ever.

  But saying that to his former boss was only going to make the guy even more worried that Tyler shouldn’t be up in the woods on his own. So Tyler said, “I got it,” like he knew he was supposed to.

  But Aidan wasn’t falling for it. “You want to take care of everybody, Tyler, and that’s not a bad thing. But you can’t miss the bigger picture here.”

  Tyler was afraid that was the problem, though.

  “What if this one has a point?” he said. “There are a lot of species living in the old growth forest up here. The proposed firebreak won’t help them—and it won’t protect the town from a big blaze. A smaller blaze might even burn out naturally, given the existing geological features.”

  “Might,” Aidan repeated. “Are you willing to stake someone’s life on a maybe?”

  Tyler swallowed, feeling too hot in his skin. He didn’t need the reminder of what could happen if a fire burned out of control.

  Aidan’s voice softened. “We’re always going to save more lives than we lose, Tyler. Even if we can’t protect every nest, we can still protect people’s homes. Don’t go forgetting that’s what you’re there to do.”

  “I know,” Tyler said. And he did.

  “You finish what the Forest Service hired you for. You need any talking points, you let me know. But I’m serious, McCall. This lady isn’t your problem, and you don’t have to make her one. Besides, if you really want to move into management, you know as well as I do that you need this to go well.” Tyler heard a wail in the background, and then Aidan said, “Shit, I have to run. Will just woke up. You need anything else, you call me. Don’t hesitate. Got it?”

  “Thanks, boss,” Tyler said, trying to sound cheerful, like that chat had really helped.

  Like his problem was some “lady” proving herself to be a nuisance. Someone he could easily dismiss instead of someone who’d managed to work her way into his every waking thought.

  But Aidan was right. Of course he was. Abbi couldn’t hold
sway over him.

  This was Tyler’s job, the one reason he’d come to Gold Mountain. If he couldn’t do this, then what use was he?

  Chapter Twelve

  Abbi walked into the nature center Monday morning with her head full of a million things she had to do.

  Then she caught sight of Tyler down the hall and all she could think of was his rough hands holding her tightly, the hard kiss he’d given her before they’d gotten back in their cars.

  She felt a flush creep up her face, a mix of excitement and something else, something right moving through her veins. She wanted to see him again. No excuses for why they’d happened to find themselves together. Just him and his incredible body taking up her bed.

  Maybe there was something convenient to everyone in the office already thinking they were a couple. She didn’t have to hide how much he was on her mind.

  But as soon as she started to wave, Tyler ducked into the spare office he’d been given as though he didn’t even notice her. As though her I know what you did this weekend grin meant nothing to him.

  She stopped in her tracks, blood suddenly cold. Hadn’t it been just yesterday that he’d kissed her up against his truck and told her he’d see her soon? What could have possibly happened since then?

  Maybe he was already done with her. Maybe fucking her twice was enough and he was over it, back to fake smiles when they were forced together and sidestepping each other the rest of the time.

  She should have shut things down after round one so she got to say how they ended. She shouldn’t have let herself imagine there was anything more.

  Then she got to her office, checked her email, and she understood.

  Tyler wasn’t avoiding her because he wasn’t interested.

  He was avoiding her because he was a coward.

  Sure, he’d intervene if Russ was on the prowl. He’d cover his ass if his bosses were around. But that didn’t mean he had the balls to face her and admit what he’d done.

  She tried to make her eyes focus on the email but she could barely read it. It didn’t matter the details—the point of the memo was clear.

  Abbi had failed.

  She’d failed to convince Tyler, failed to stop the firebreak, failed to use—not sex, that wasn’t what she meant. But her closeness to Tyler, the fact that she’d thought they could talk about the project not as some abstract concept among colleagues but really see it, live it, experience it out in the woods… She’d thought she’d connected with him.

  Apparently, she’d been dead wrong.

  She cleared her schedule for the day. Then she dug out her notes from the walkthrough, sifting through everything she’d gleaned from those two days. She’d put them aside, thinking she wasn’t going to have to use that information after all. She wasn’t so naïve anymore.

  Out her office window she could see the rise of the hill that opened to the field, the gazebo, and the mountains beyond. She closed the blinds.

  Think, she told herself.

  She had to fix this. She had to come up with a plan to stop Tyler and save her career.

  Preferably one that didn’t require her heart to be intact, since she was pretty sure hers was now in pieces on the floor.

  …

  Tyler had been given a temporary office that was both conveniently—and maddeningly—located close enough to Abbi’s office that he could see when her light was on but far enough that he couldn’t tell what she was up to in there.

  Didn’t she need a lunch break? The bathroom? Didn’t she have a million things to do that didn’t involve staying in her office all day?

  He hadn’t known how to react when he first laid eyes on her that morning. Should he pick up where they’d left things at the end of the weekend? The last thing he’d done before getting in his truck was press her against it, which he’d be more than happy to do again… But there was a difference between pretending they were dating and actually following through with every not-safe-for-work thing he wanted.

  And he had a feeling that he’d just extinguished whatever might have been building between them. If he could guess by the volume with which she’d slammed her office door, she must have gotten the email he’d sent to her, Russ, Walker, and Chip.

  His phone call with Aidan still left a bad taste in his mouth. But it had also clarified what he had to do. He had a job here, and it wasn’t to make sure Abbi got her promotion.

  Too bad he didn’t think she’d see it that way.

  He watched the clock creep by. It was late in the afternoon when his email finally dinged with a response. He opened it quickly, hoping for a sign that things were okay.

  But when he read it, his heart didn’t just slow down. It stopped.

  To: Walker Reynolds; Chip Fields

  CC: Russell Young; Tyler McCall

  From: Abigail Haas

  Subject: Re: GM Firebreak Proposal

  Although the proposal presented by Mr. McCall addresses wildlife resources in general terms, it neglects to take into consideration the specific habitat of the northern spotted owl that will be disrupted by the proposed construction.

  I have reviewed the area intended to be cut and am beginning a follow-up analysis of major old growth trees in the region, which form the primary habitat for the spotted owl.

  Please see the attached documents for counts of trees available, nests, and habitats observed. As the data indicates, this firebreak would not be permitted in the state of California and is technically eligible here only because Washington’s spotted owl population had until more recently been steady. However, with the continuing westward expansion of the barred owl competing for resources, we are seeing a precipitous decline.

  It is vital that we stay ahead of this problem and not exacerbate the situation by cutting habitat. I urge the Forest Service to review the attached documents and consider the long-term effects of this plan.

  Sincerely,

  Abbi Haas

  Gold Mountain Nature Center

  ahaas@gmnc.gov

  Tyler clicked through the attachments. He hadn’t really believed any of those notes she’d been scribbling on their walkthrough would stick.

  But there was a lot of information here. A lot of information that no one at the Forest Service would be able to ignore.

  Goddammit, Abbi. He knew it was important to her to stop the project. But what the hell was he supposed to do now?

  Aidan had said to call anytime, but Tyler didn’t want to have to go crawling back to California for advice every time he hit a stumbling block.

  Besides, he knew what Aidan would say. Stay calm, stick to the facts, remember that he wasn’t personally responsible for endangering some fuzzy little owl chick. Wasn’t he there to save an entire town from going up in flames?

  The next hours felt like an eternity.

  Tyler knew the only thing more useless than waiting around doing nothing while his project got pulled out from under him was waiting around doing nothing and staring at the computer while his project got pulled out from under him. But as long as he saw the light down the hall, he stayed. He wasn’t going to be blindsided.

  And he was right to wait. The rest of the lights were off, the building emptied for the day, when the response finally came.

  To: Abigail Haas

  CC: Russell Young; Tyler McCall; Chip Fields

  From: Walker Reynolds

  Subject: Re: re: GM Firebreak Proposal

  Thank you, Abbi, for that information.

  The Forest Service has agreed to implement a moratorium on proceedings until we can verify that the data is accurate and that a firebreak at the proposed location poses a threat to declining spotted owl populations.

  We will be in touch regarding next steps.

  Walker Reynolds

  US Forest Service

  Washington

  www.fs.fed.us

  Tyler brought his hands to his head. Pause wasn’t good. Pause meant loss of dollars, momentum, goodwill. Pause meant Tyler limping out of Gol
d Mountain with nothing on his resume to help him get a new job, and nothing to do but tell his mentor he’d failed.

  If he couldn’t deal with a little controversy in the middle of nowhere, how could he be expected to hack it anywhere else? He didn’t want to bounce from job to job, like his mother had done. The whole point was to use this to make something stick.

  He pushed back his chair and strode down the hallway. Fake girlfriend or not, this was horseshit. He wasn’t going to tiptoe around her, as though he owed her anything just because they’d fucked a few times. This was his ass on the line. Even more than that, this was the safety of her town.

  Didn’t she realize he was trying to help this place, not go around bulldozing the woods like he didn’t give a damn? Didn’t she realize he was on her side?

  Well, that wasn’t going to happen anymore. He wasn’t going to be on top of her, underneath her, next to her in any way. He wasn’t going to keep pretending to be in this relationship, either—not to help her career, and not even for his.

  She was on her own.

  But as he approached her office door, he heard the unmistakable sound of arguing. And then a huge crash, the sound of wood splintering, something heavy going down.

  There was no point knocking. Certainly no thinking. He shoved open the door.

  Chapter Thirteen

  The door flew open with a bang.

  Abbi thought it was over, there was nothing she could do. Russ was going to take his anger out on every single part of her office.

  And then he was going to take it out on her.

  Until all of a sudden Tyler was there, throwing himself between her and Russ, shouting, “What the fuck is going on?”

  He was pure muscle, pure presence.

  Pure rage.

  She hadn’t known he was in the building. All she’d been thinking was that she wished Walker hadn’t written back so late, when no one was around.

  She’d only meant to shake things up. Show Tyler she wasn’t about to roll over and play dead just because he had a smooth tongue and knew how to use it. Especially when it was clear he’d come back from their weekend together more certain than ever that his plans were going through.