The Journey Home

by Lee Carroll

  “What’s wrong with him?” Mike quietly spoke to White, as if the patient might hear him.

  “He’s dying,” replied the white one. Mike started to ask another question when a woman in her early forties entered the room alone. She stood there for some moments just inside the room, looking at the man in the bed. Mike realized that somehow she was special. His intuition remained alert, even within this seeming vision.

  “Who is she?” Mike inquired.

  “She is the daughter of the dying man,” stated White. “The story you are seeing is really about her.” Mike took it all in as White continued to speak. “Her name is Mary, and she has every reason to despise the man in the bed.”

  “Why should she hate her father?”

  “Because he abused her greatly when she was just a child,” replied White. “It scarred her emotionally and physically. It ruined her life.” White paused, and they both watched Mary approach the bed. The angel continued, “Her mother never knew about it, since Mary was too frightened to tell her. It affected their relationship as mother and daughter, and Mary moved out of her home early to get away from her lusting father. Her mother thought that Mary didn’t want her, and they never were able to enjoy any adult friendship. Mary never told her anything, and she died thinking that Mary didn’t love her.”

  “That’s terrible!” Mike was genuinely distressed. He could feel the unfairness of the situation and felt very sorry for Mary. The angel looked at Mike quizzically.

  “They are family, Michael. Certainly you didn’t already forget your lessons in the Red House?” Mike felt ashamed. No, he hadn’t forgotten, but this was the first time he had tried to relate what he learned about his own spiritual family to another human. He realized that White was alluding to the fact that the father and daughter had a karmic contract together, just like those he had with his own spiritual family.

  “It gets worse.”White was still speaking. “When she tried to have a normal relationship and find a husband, the early experiences with her father always somehow spoiled it for her. She never was able to successfully marry and have children of her own.”

  Mike sighed, and then spoke. “That’s quite an agreement they had.” He was overwhelmed by the heaviness of what Mary must have gone through. The angel looked at Mike in an admiring way. He didn’t have to say anything. It was White’s way of giving Mike a compliment from what he had learned so far along the path.

  “Do you understand, Michael Thomas, that what happened with Mary and her father was a contract of incredible love?”

  “I do,White. But as a human, I still find it a very hard concept to understand and accept.”

  “That’s your duality working, Michael,” stated White. “You may never completely accept some of these things while you are in human form, and that is totally appropriate.” Mike continued to look upon the situation in the hospital room. Mary was quietly staring at her father, perhaps waiting for him to awaken. She placed some of her things on the bedside table.

  “She must hate him very much,” Mike said sadly and softly to White.

  “No, Mike. She loves him greatly.” Mike was shocked by this statement.

  “After all he did?” Mike questioned. White turned and faced him.

  “Mary has something in common with you, Michael Thomas—and something not in common.” The angel stopped and looked hard at Mike for his reaction. Mike was listening. “Unlike you, she is on Earth now, but like you she has a full realization of the information you have received in the first six houses.” Mike was stunned! He had believed that his spiritual training was something a human only received by going through the journey he was now on. He didn’t know what to say. How could this be? The angel saw Mike’s anguish and confusion and continued.

  “Mary made her vibrational shifts on her own, Michael, and it took almost nine years of her life. You have done yours in only a few weeks! You are indeed special. The information you have gleaned in the first five houses, plus the information found in the last two, however, has been on Earth for eons. For a human to obtain it, he just has to realize his duality and give intent to find the truth of his existence. There has been much written about the way things work, and there are many human teachers who can help attain understanding.”

  Mike was very quiet. This was very new information, and he had to take it in slowly and understand what it meant. He was beginning to feel uneasy. Had he made a mistake in the original vision, asking White to allow him to leave Earth and go Home? Now, he realized, everything he was learning would also have been available had he stayed.

  “White, why did it take her nine years?”

  “She went at her own pace, Michael, and was honored for it. She did not have the benefit you did of angels who explained and tutored. She did not have the honor you had of meeting your family face to face. She doesn’t know their angel names as you do. It took far longer for her since she is still in the vibration of the three and lives within an energy that is lower. Her duality is stronger, therefore, and her awareness and enlightenment took longer because of it.”

  Mike sat and looked at Mary. Here she was, vibrating at a very high level, but she looked so small and frail.

  “Don’t let appearances fool you, Michael. Everything is not as it seems.” The white angel had again read Mike’s energy. “She is a warrior of the light. She has slain the giant and is powerful!”

  Mike was really starting to feel uneasy now. What exactly did that mean? He started to ask about it when White spoke again.

  “Michael Thomas of Pure Intent, we are here to watch this seemingly insignificant woman teach you the four attributes of love.”Mike was very still. He knew intuitively that there was a great deal yet to learn. Just when he thought he was approaching Home, things were becoming more complicated. The angel continued, “Pay attention, for she carries with her the same power I do. She understands love, Michael, and part of me resides in her because of it. There is no greater power than this. She has also accepted the golden one.”

  Mike knew this was no time to ask any more questions. He watched while White continued the explanation of what was taking place.

  “Michael Thomas, the first attribute of Love is this: LOVE IS QUIET. Notice that she did not enter the room with a fanfare. Her abusive father is very ill. He cannot defend himself and is weak. It would have been a grand opportunity for revenge. She could have entered in a noisy fashion, announcing herself and making him fear her. He knows what he did, Michael, and he is ashamed and guilty. It has affected his life as well, and he has dealt with it poorly for years. He does not know what she knows spiritually. He does not have her new power. Watch her quietness, Michael Thomas.”

  Mike and White watched in silence as Mary straightened her father’s sheets. She seated herself beside the frail man and lay her head gently on his chest. Mike could feel what she was feeling! Somehow White was allowing for this. There was peace and serenity in her attitude and her mind. There was no thought whatsoever of retribution in her heart. She had forgiven her father so completely that her mind and heart had no feelings of victimization or anger. What a woman! Mike felt her compassion for this man who had fulfilled his contract so completely and had made such a compelling and serious mark on her life.

  It was a long time coming, but finally the father opened his eyes and discovered her presence. She stood up when he awakened. His eyes got very wide, and you could see his instant feelings of fear and surprise. Here she was! What was she doing here? He hadn’t seen her in years and years!Was she going to yell at him—or worse? He was beginning to react. The instruments measuring his bodily diagnostics began to increase in their activity. The beeping, hissing, and clicking got faster.

  “Watch, Michael,” White spoke in his wonderful mellifluous voice. “Here is the second attribute of pure love. LOVE HAS NO AGENDA. She could ask anything she wants of her father right now, for he is weak and guilty. He is a wealthy man. She could demand abundance, legal reparation for what he did, or perhaps j
ust demand that he recant his past performance aloud for her to hear. She could threaten him with harm or estate ruin—or both. Watch her, Michael.”

  Mary placed her hand on her father’s head and whispered in his ear. Immediately, the activity of the instruments quieted. He sighed, and Mike could see the beginning of tears in his eyes.

  “What did she say, White?” Mike didn’t hear Mary’s whisper.

  “She said, I love you father, and I forgive you completely,” the angel replied. Mike was amazed at this drama playing out before his eyes. He wondered if he would have had the power and wisdom to do the same had he been in her situation. He admired Mary greatly.

  “She didn’t ask for anything?”

  “No, Michael. She is content to simply BE.”

  Again, Mike felt what Mary felt. Everything was finalized and gone regarding the karma between them. She was clear and was somehow giving him the same clearance and closure on a potent feature of their lives together. She had just disarmed something that had consumed him with grief and guilt for more than 35 years!You could see it in his face. Instead of demanding something in retribution, she had given him a gift. Now, the tears were large, and flowing silently down his cheeks. Mary again sat and wrapped her arms around this precious man who was her father, and again lay her head on his chest. There was no dialogue at all. It wasn’t necessary.

  “Michael Thomas, the third attribute of love is this: LOVE DOES NOT PUFF ITSELF UP. Now that she has established the fact that her maturity is glorious, indeed, she says nothing. He owes her a great deal right now due to her divine reconciliation, yet she remains quiet. She could have gloated in her power and stood tall with pride that she had been able to forgive him, yet she remains quiet. She has every right to stand up and beat her chest about the nine years that it took to get to this place—yet she remains quiet.”

  Mike was in awe of this woman. Indeed she was a warrior of the light, and understood things that Mike was just learning. Imagine such a thing! She was still on Earth with all this knowledge! What a peaceful and rich life she must have. Mike was introspective, but he was absolutely enthralled by the scene unfolding before him.

  There was nothing the father could say. All had been forgiven, and a wonderful peace and release were being felt by his very fiber. Mary hadn’t done anything spiritual for her father; in fact, she had only improved herself—yet it was affecting him. Here was something else to look at clearly. Mike knew that what he was seeing had great significance.

  The father took a long look at his wonderful daughter and gently closed his eyes. The smile on his face was pure peace. She had given him the gift of a lifetime—just in time. The instruments plugged into the man began to howl different tones and volumes. The hissing stopped, and Mike knew that the father had just passed on. Attendants rushed in, but there was nothing to be done. After much activity and some final preparations, they covered his head and left him alone with Mary. White spoke again.

  “Michael Thomas, the fourth attribute of pure love is this: LOVE HAS THEWISDOM TO USE THE OTHER THREE PERFECTLY! She timed everything appropriately and arrived correctly. She used her intuitive map, Michael Thomas, to know exactly when to come. Now watch what she does.”

  Mike’s attention turned from White back to what was taking place in the room. Mary was not sobbing uncontrollably at the loss of her father. She was not filled with grief, even though her love for this man was great. She had asked the attendants to allow her to remain. Mike watched as Mary placed her hand on the chest of the covered figure that had been her father—the seed of her existence. She lifted up her head and faced White and Mike! She seemed to speak right to them! It was Mary’s strong voice that they both now heard for the first time.

  “Let the Earth remember this man, whom I love dearly.” Mary’s voice had authority as she continued. “He came and discharged his agreement perfectly. I accept his gift! Celebrate his return home.”

  Mary quietly lowered her eyes, gathered her things, and left the room. Michael’s mouth was agape at what he had just seen. He felt the emotion of the moment and was overwhelmed by it. He had just watched the completion and closure of a life-long contract, and what a finish!

  “It was the wisdom of love that allowed Mary to celebrate his death and not mourn it,” said a very wise White. White looked at Michael Thomas and immediately asked for his reaction.

  “What do you feel, Michael Thomas of Pure Intent?” White was not impatient and waited for Mike to recover some composure.

  “I feel,” Mike had to clear his throat. “I feel...that I have been taught as much in these few moments by this small woman, as I have by all the angels in my journey so far.”Mike realized what he was saying, and he instantly felt sheepish. “Not that I don’t appreciate—” White held up his indistinct hand and stopped Mike from continuing.

  “Your answer was perfect, Michael Thomas. Perfect. It is the human who has been able to make the difference. That is as it should be and as it will be also in the next test.”

  Instantly the scene blurred, and again Mike had the feeling of motion as he was transported. Before long they were back in the white room of the white house where they had started. Mike was very quiet.

  “Do you have any questions, Michael Thomas?” White inquired. Mike thought about what he really wanted. He knew that he was not as powerful as Mary. He knew that although he had learned a great deal and had understood much of the workings of things, he still did not have Mary’s quiet power. He had tools, a magic map, and much knowledge. He had a high vibration and had experienced much, but he did not have the love that Mary had. He asked the magic question.

  “Can I have this powerful Love, White?”

  “Is it your intent that it be so, Michael Thomas?”

  “Yes, it is.”

  “Michael Thomas of Pure Intent, do you love God?”

  Mike straightened, thinking that this must be the reason all the angels had asked this question—for this very moment—so that he could stand here and answer.

  “Yes, I do, White.” Michael was formal.

  “Then let your pure intent create the power!”

  Mike didn’t remember what happened next. He lost consciousness as a human. He had dreams...he was somehow carried some-where... there was a ceremony...there was celebration...something was given to him...a gift that he would carry in his cellular biological structure. There were his parents again! It was all so indistinct. All so wonderful.

  When he awoke, Mike found himself on his white bed, in his white quarters. It was evening, and he was exhausted. He felt that he had been through some kind of gymnastic ceremonial ordeal. His mind was bleary, and he couldn’t concentrate. What had happened? He would sort it all out later. Now, he had to sleep. Mike crawled under the covers and instantly slept. As before, he slept very well.

  WHEN HE AWOKE the next morning, Mike knew that again a shift had taken place within his very biology. He sat on the edge of his bed for a very long time, thinking about it all. He felt rested and peaceful. He felt renewed!Although he couldn’t assign a particular feeling to it, he also felt somehow wiser within the scope of his being. Mike knew so much —and that’s where the trouble was brewing.

  He couldn’t get the picture of Mary and her father out of his mind. Mary was on Earth, yet she was such a wonderful spiritual being. She had accomplished great changes in her vibration and was powerful in her life. She had stayed. She hadn’t ask to go “home.” She had endured life on Earth and had gone the whole route. Mike had bailed!

  Where was the integrity in this? Mike was just beginning to see where his new wisdom was actually creating a kind of introspection and integrity check of the kind he had never known before. Oh, Mike was honest—perhaps one of the most honest men around. All that farm living and being trained by wonderfully honest parents had paid off, but it never gave him feelings like this. Earth honesty wasn’t the same as spiritual honesty. Spiritual honesty seemed to include the wisdom of several more dimensions before
the integrity check was complete.

  Mike was beginning to understand what Red and White might have meant regarding his choice to continue. With his newfound wisdom, his thinking had begun to change. Was all that he was doing correct? Was there a greater spiritual quest for Mike than what he had asked for?

  Mike continued to contemplate it all as he arose, dressed, and ate his morning meal. He was going to ask White some very pointed questions when he saw him. White could be his counselor in these things, and he knew that White would help him.

  White was waiting, as usual, on the other side of the door. Mike stepped into his presence but said nothing. White stood there while Mike gaped at his new surroundings. All the indistinctness of the walls and floors and hallways was now crystal clear. He saw intricacies of design he was never aware of before. It was beautiful! But that wasn’t all.

  The feeling of stepping into the angel’s light was overwhelming! He shared something with this grand white entity that spoke somehow of partnership. Mike felt he was somehow a part of what White was. Mike loved White. He felt his breath quicken in response to it all.

  “It is your new sight, Michael Thomas.” The angel spoke without Mike having to ask. “It is the beginning of a dimensional shift as well as a biological one. It is the same as Mary’s, and it is yours because you have intended it with a purity we have seldom seen.”

  “I have to ask you some important questions, White.” Mike had tried to be very quiet and respectful in his phrasing of this statement, but he was shocked by how his own voice sounded! It was larger than it should have been—or was it louder? No. It was different in an odd way, and Mike was uncomfortable with the change. It was almost a violation of his person. He felt anxious.