Forever, Mr. Black

by Shanora Williams

  She winked and I snorted, swiping the collected tears away. “I . . . I don’t know. I can’t, Kim. I can’t do that with him again. What I did almost made me fail college. I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Imagine how it would be now, with my students. My career!”

  She blew an agitated breath and pulled way. “I don’t want to hear that shit. Summer break is in a week. They aren’t getting any real work right now anyway. Look, if you don’t, I will,” she teased.

  I walked around her to get to the living room. I sat down on the loveseat and she took the spot beside me.

  “What if Sterling comes back?” I asked. “What if he wants to try again?”

  She rolled her eyes. “Would he even be worth taking back?”

  “Would Theo?” She seemed confused when I asked that. “With Theo, there isn’t just Izzy. There’s his wife. Our past. And then us. He’s twenty years older than I am. He’s way more mature. He knows a lot more than I do. What if what we had was only supposed to be a summer fling and nothing more?”

  Kim sat back, craned her head backwards, and stared up at the ceiling. “I guess you won’t know the answers to any of those questions if you don’t try, now will you?”

  I stared at her, unsure of what to say.

  She was right.

  So right.

  But I was so damn afraid.

  I loved Theo, yes. I loved him more than words could explain. When I thought of him, my heart always skipped two beats. When I saw photos of him, I felt heat rise in my belly and my heart would ache, knowing I couldn’t touch him.

  When I wanted to be near him, I felt like crying. Because all I wanted was him, even after all this time. I . . . needed him. But so much stood in the way.

  So many obstacles that I wasn’t sure we could tackle and conquer.

  I knew Kim was right. I wanted to give it another chance. I had nothing at all to lose. Sterling didn’t want me anymore. Theo’s divorce wasn’t final, but he was still separated. Izzy and I weren’t friends anymore.

  There was a possibility the wife could come running back to him and he could dump me right on my ass for her.

  There was a possibility that Izzy would spit in my face if she saw me near her father again.

  Theo was right about me running away from conflict. I always did, but only with people I cared about.

  I was being weak, but I knew all I needed was a chance to talk to him.

  A chance to fall for him . . . all over again . . . just like last time.

  Kim and I sat in lounge chairs in the back yard, grading papers, soaking up the sun, and sipping on cranberry wine spritzers. This felt much more freeing than if we’d have been sitting beside Theo and Izzy. Talk about awkward.

  “You keep checking your phone,” Kim mused, tilting her sunglasses down to look at me when I picked it up.

  I playfully rolled my eyes at her, setting it on my lap. “Oh, hush.”

  “You’re waiting on a call or a text from him, aren’t you?”

  “I am not.” I was lying. I was waiting on a text or a call—preferably a call.

  Kim snickered and stood up. “Well, I’m going to start cooking the dinner I promised. You just keep on waiting for that phone call.”

  I nodded and she walked off. When I heard the door close behind her, I picked my cellphone up and went straight to Facebook.

  I searched for Theo’s account again. He’d added a photo. It was of him and Izzy on the beach. A selfie that Izzy obviously took, because his hands were planted behind him. They looked similar, but she favored Janet a lot more.

  I smiled at the two of them. They were happy. And then I thought . . .

  What kind of person would I be to destroy their bond again? I was confused, though. He chased after me, and she saw it happen. She didn’t stop him. She spoke to Kim very briefly about the divorce. (And yes, I made Kim spill every detail but it didn’t explain much.)

  He said she’d changed, but people don’t often change the very essence of who they are. She forgave me in that letter, but that didn’t mean she had to tolerate me.

  I sighed, placing my phone on my lap again, and pointing my face up towards the sky. He needed to hurry up and contact me. Now, I was desperate. And eager. And my only wish was that I had asked for his number in return.

  After Kim finished cooking dinner, and we chowed down on her amazing shrimp scampi, I cleaned the dining room and kitchen while she worked on papers a little more.

  “Still nothing?” she called from the living room.

  I scrubbed the pan, glancing over my shoulder. “Nothing.”

  “Think he’ll actually call?”

  He’d better. “I don’t know,” I said instead.

  “Crazy fox.”

  Around 10:00 p.m., as Kim was packing her things and collecting her keys, I finally got the call I had been waiting for all day.

  I wasn’t familiar with the number, but it came with a San Francisco area code. Kim paused on everything she was doing, straightening up as I literally jumped out of my seat with my phone clutched in hand.

  “Is that him?”

  “I don’t know,” I said hoarsely. “I hope so.”

  “Oh shit. Well, let me go, but make sure you call and tell me everything!”

  “I will!”

  She walked towards the door and wriggled her eyebrows at me before shutting it behind her. I stepped back and hurried up the stairs, entering the bedroom.

  It continued ringing as I sat on the bed’s bench, staring at the number. I had already memorized it, just in case.

  My heart was hammering down on my ribcage now. With shaking fingers, I pressed the answer button and then lifted the receiver up to my ear.

  I swallowed the thick emotion in my throat before speaking.

  “Theo?”

  “How’d you know?” he asked, and his voice was smooth and deep, and so fucking sexy.

  “The number says San Francisco under it. You told me before you left Bristle Wave that you were moving there . . . with her.”

  He was quiet for a moment. “Yeah, I remember.” I remained just as quiet and then he grunted. “Do me a favor?” he said after it sounded like a car door had shut.

  “What?”

  “Look out of your window.”

  My eyebrows drew together. “What?” I looked towards the window, confused now.

  “Look out of your window,” he repeated, and I stood slowly, tiptoeing across the carpet. I pushed the sheer white curtain aside and peered out. I didn’t see anything at first, but then I saw the black Chrysler parked across the street.

  I’d never seen anyone next door or across the street with that car. And it was black. All black. Black rims. Black paint. Tinted windows.

  He was here.

  I looked towards the sidewalk where my mailbox was, and he was standing right by the curb, one hand in his front pocket, the other used to hold the phone to his ear.

  “Oh my God, Theo, what are you doing here?” I hissed, as if someone would overhear me. But there was no one here. No one but me.

  “I’m here for my Knight.”

  “But—Izzy,” I stammered. “Aren’t you supposed to be with her?”

  “She’s rehearsing a script. She told me she would be at it all night, so I told her I’ll be at Dane’s. I guess fate wanted me to come here instead.”

  I cleared my throat, my heart beating a mile a minute.

  “Are you going to let me in?” he asked, and his head tilted. “Or is that fiancé of yours lingering around?”

  I stepped away from the window, staring down at the ring on my finger.

  “Chloe?” he called.

  His voice sent a swirl deep in my belly. I was all wound up—not thinking clearly. My stomach was in one big knot, and I knew the only person that could unravel it was him.

  “Give me a second,” I murmured. I ended the call and tossed my phone on the mattress. I stared down at my ring, not blinking. Contemplating.

  If I took thi
s off, it meant I was giving up on Sterling. It meant I was done with what we had, and I wasn’t turning back, no matter what happened between me and Theo.

  I wanted to help him.

  I wanted to be there for him . . .

  But Kim was right.

  I needed to stop punishing myself. Sterling wasn’t over Janet. And I wasn’t over Theo. And Theo . . . he wasn’t over me.

  So I chose to do the wiser thing . . . I think.

  I snatched off the ring and walked towards the jewelry box, tossing it in one of the slots where my old jewelry was, and then turning for the door. I rushed down the stairs like a kid on Christmas morning, dashing for the front door and yanking it open.

  Perhaps I was being reckless—stupid even—but I didn’t care. He was here. He was here.

  When I looked out, he had his back facing me but he turned around when he heard the creak of the door, his hands in his front pockets.

  I walked out slowly, my heart beating harder now. I was barefoot, so the cement was cool on the bottoms of my feet.

  I stopped about halfway.

  He stood there, looking me up and down in my jean shorts and black tank top. My hair was still frizzy, but I’d tossed it into a messy bun to keep it off of my neck.

  Our eyes held for a long time.

  It was so quiet between us that all I could hear was my chaotic heartbeat. I didn’t know what I was doing. I wasn’t thinking straight, and neither was he.

  He ran his eyes up and down my body several times before locking onto my face. My lips.

  And then he walked forward, towards me.

  He moved quickly, his thick boots crunching on the pavement, his jaw locked, his broad chest upright.

  When he met up to me, he stopped, and he studied my face—every single detail. Everything. It was like he wanted to memorize every feature all over again, though I was sure he’d never forgotten them.

  His eyes traveled down to my lips.

  I almost stopped breathing as I did the same.

  And then . . . he did exactly what I wanted.

  He cupped a hand around the back of my neck, and his lips came crashing down on mine. He took a sharp inhale, like his breath had become constricted—like my presence stole the air from his lungs He kissed me so wholly that I melted in his grasp. His possessive grip on me made the knot unravel in my belly, just as I knew it would.

  He worked his velvety tongue through my parted lips and then he picked me up in his strong arms, storming inside the house.

  The house I’d been sharing with Sterling for years.

  Chapter 10

  Chloe

  I don’t know how the door ended up shut behind us. Maybe he’d kicked it. I don’t know.

  I don’t know why I was letting him lay me down on the couch, or why I was allowing him to have his hands all over me, with all the shit we had going on in our lives, but I refused to stop him.

  He groaned as he continued the kiss, and I threaded my fingers through his thick hair, wrapping my legs around his waist, and hauling him closer with my thighs.

  “Goddamn, Chloe,” he rasped when our mouths momentarily parted. But it didn’t last long because he came back down with my face locked in his hands.

  He didn’t hold back.

  I refused to hold back.

  All day I had waited for him. Hell, let’s be honest. For years, I had waited for him. This was wrong all over again, but this . . . this moment was fucking bliss.

  I didn’t care that he had remarried. I didn’t care that Izzy was in town and probably less than ten miles away. I didn’t care that Sterling could walk right through that door and catch us.

  I honestly didn’t give a single, flying fuck.

  My Theodore was back, and being light and easy was not an option. I was greedy for every single part of him. So greedy that I ended up reaching down to unbutton his jeans.

  He groaned behind our kiss and pulled his hands away, planting an elbow outside my head.

  “How long’s it been?” he murmured, voice thick and raspy.

  I shook my head, catching his bottom lip with my teeth. “Too long.”

  A beautiful smirk played on his lips, and he sat up, locking my wrists in his hands and pinning them to the couch.

  “Where is he?” he questioned.

  I exhaled raggedly. “Not here.”

  He looked at my fingers, noticing the ring was gone. “Are you still marrying him?”

  I shrugged. I could have told him he had called off the engagement, but it was better this way, for him to not know anything. I wanted to know how far he would go if it meant I still belonged to Sterling.

  He frowned, nostrils flaring. “Don’t fucking marry him.”

  “You married her,” I scowled.

  “You left me no choice.”

  I narrowed my brows and snatched my hands away from him. “I didn’t do a damn thing, Theo! I didn’t tell you to run off and marry another woman!”

  “Yeah, but you left. It was either try to move on, or dwell on a woman that didn’t want me anywhere near her.”

  “I never said I didn’t want you near me.”

  “That’s what it seemed like. Lost all contact with me.” He raked a rough hand through his hair.

  “Well, if you feel that way, why are you back?” I sat up, frustrated, tucking my hair behind my ears. There goes our moment.

  He looked at me with hard, serious brown eyes. “Because I fucking miss you, Chloe. I’m forty-fucking-six, and I should be fucking happy and going after whatever the fuck I want before it’s too late.” He held my face in his hands again, bringing me closer, our lips a sliver away. “I don’t want her. You know it. I know it. I never did.”

  “And I don’t want him—not more than you . . . but we can’t.”

  “Why the fuck can’t we? I’m tired of denying what I feel for you. I don’t give a fuck if other people think it’s wrong. It felt right and I want it back.”

  I tried to pull away, but he held my arm. “Theo . . .”

  “No—Chloe, don’t say my name like that.” He pulled one hand away to lower the strap of my tank top. I wasn’t wearing a bra, and when he realized, his eyes dilated. “Every single day since you left, I have been miserable without you. I couldn’t sleep for months, and if I did end up catching some sleep, I would dream about you. I know you’re scared,” he murmured against my lips. “I know you think we shouldn’t be together again after what happened last time, but just like I said before we started the last time: Don’t think about it. Don’t worry about it. Let’s just be us, Little Knight. Let’s focus on us.”

  He watched my face carefully. I could only stare at him. I didn’t know what to say, so I decided not to say anything at all. There were no words right now. He’d stolen them right off my tongue and put them out for both of us to hear.

  Instead of speaking, I threw my arms around his neck and yanked him forward. He fell on top of me, our lips locked, and he unbuttoned and yanked my shorts down. Our lips fell apart when he snatched off my tank top.

  All that was left was my panties, and he carefully slid them down, exposing me. All of me.

  I was breathing so hard.

  He was panting so deep.

  He was so hungry for me.

  “Look at this body,” he whispered, sliding his palms between my thighs. “So perfect,” he mumbled, lowering his face to my sex. “So sweet.” He kissed the outside of my pussy and I bucked. He pressed a hand on my pelvis, shaking his head. “So fucking beautiful. Fuck, I’ve missed you.”

  With no hesitation at all, he slid his tongue between the slit and then sucked gently. I cried out, clutching the edge of the suede sofa, my back arching and my mind numb. I ached below as he teased and toyed with me, crying out even more when he slid his damp tongue inside me, drawing out my pleasure. This was happening so fast—too fast, all over again.

  I glanced down, and his eyes were right on mine. He sucked on my clit, and my legs quaked around his head. He cup
ped my ass in his hands when my hips tilted up in the air, and he sank his face even deeper, eating me like he hadn’t been fed in years.

  “Oh my God, Theo,” I sighed, sliding my fingers through his hair. I didn’t mean to, but I hauled him even closer, and he groaned, causing a vibrating sensation between my thighs that shot me over the fucking moon.

  I came. Hard. Harder than I had in years. That fast. Goodness.

  He was the only one that could do this to me. He knew my body, and he knew it well. It was like he’d never forgotten how to please me, not even after all this time.

  He pulled away, placing a kiss on the area right above my aching nub. “You’ve always been mine, Little Knight. You know it.” He sat up and I did as well, panting raggedly. “I know it.”

  I yanked his jeans down when they were loose and his boxers next. His thick cock sprung free, and my core clenched with need. I looked up, running my hands over his thighs and wrapping them around his hips.

  “Can I show you that I missed you?” I begged a little, and his eyes lit up like they were on fire.

  He stroked my hair. “Yeah,” he rasped. “Show me I’m not the only one feeling this way.”

  I nodded and then spread my lips, working them around his thick tip. He tensed, squeezing his hand in my hair, holding tight with each savory inch I slid into my mouth.

  I looked up again, and his eyes were trained on me. He was breathing so fast and his cock was so hard, I swear he was about to come in my mouth already. But I knew he wouldn’t.

  He was a patient man.

  That was one of the things I loved most about him.

  I took his entire member into my mouth, and he palmed the back of my head, keeping me there for a moment before releasing me. I pulled back, inhaling before giving him the blowjob of a lifetime.

  I wanted him to know I missed him.

  I wanted him to know that he wasn’t the only one feeling this way.