Long Lost (Gay Romance)

by Trina Solet

  As Blake was losing himself to that feeling, Reese stepped back, suddenly out of reach. Letting out an unhappy grunt, Blake grabbed for him, wanting to drag him back. Desperate for his cock, he took hold of Reese's jeans. Reese pushed his head back.

  "Settle down. I'm not going anywhere. I'm all yours," Reese said to him.

  Blake chuckled at his own shameless need for him.

  "I can't believe you're real and you're here," he gasped. "How did I ever think I could live without you?"

  Reese stepped closer but not to let Blake give him head.

  "Come here," Reese said pulling him up and toward the bed. "I want to fuck."

  It was what Blake wanted to hear, but he still hesitated, scared of getting what he wanted.

  "Are you sure?" Blake asked. He felt unworthy.

  "I know what I want. Always have," Reese told him smugly and kissed him. "You're late to the party. I was ready for you five years ago," Reese told him.

  "Sorry."

  "Don't be sorry. Make it up to me," Reese demanded.

  "I want to be good to you."

  "Go right ahead. I'm all for that. Proceed," Reese said with deliberate arrogance in the face of Blake's groveling.

  "How long are you going to be a dick to me?" Blake asked, smiling at Reese's imperious attitude.

  "What? You don't think you earned it?" Reese asked while smiling seductively.

  "I have no objections. I'll take everything you throw at me until I've proven myself to you."

  "Sounds like a plan," Reese said.

  Reese then settled himself on the bed, and Blake pulled his jeans and boxers off. Lying there, Reese was a vision from his filthiest fantasies. Rock hard, legs parted, biting his lower lip, he was a picture of deliberate provocation. His look said come and get me as his foot rubbed the inside of Blake's thigh.

  While Reese displayed himself lewdly, Blake went to kneel between his legs. Lifting one leg, he kissed his way up from Reese's foot to his crotch. He tongued his balls then skipped his cock and licked his navel. Reese grunted and Blake moved up over his taut belly to his chest. Using his teeth on the nipples a little, he made Reese gasp and writhe.

  Blake kissed his mouth next. It was a long kiss. In it Blake could feel how much Reese wanted him. He hoped Reese could read his desire as well. Impatient for more, Reese was shifting under him, thrusting and grinding into him.

  Blake moved on to kissing his neck and felt Reese clutching at him. Blake pressed his lips to the crook of his neck. He wanted to measure every part of Reese with the touch of his lips. How many kisses could he place along his shoulder and down his arm until he was kissing his knuckles and sucking his fingers into his mouth?

  Reese moaned with abandon, and Blake kissed every inch of his face until their mouths met. Reese moaned into the kiss. Blake felt like Reese was slowly opening to him and losing himself to the moment. They were connecting. Then Reese suddenly stopped. His eyes looked into Blake's like Reese wanted to take possession of him with his stare alone. But he had already done that the first time their eyes met.

  Reaching up his hand, Reese cupped his face. "You know, I've had plenty of sex, but I've never made love. Yeah, I know it's corny, but that corny crap is what I want from you."

  "I can deliver," Blake told him then he just gazed at him and gathered all the courage he had. "I love you," he said to Reese.

  He wasn't sure Reese was ready to hear it, but Blake couldn't fuck him without telling him he loved him.

  "That's not what I meant," Reese said after a shocked moment of silence.

  But Blake could see happiness spread over his face as soon as he heard those words. It was in his smile and in his shining eyes.

  "I always loved you. I just didn't know." Blake kissed Reese so he wouldn't feel like he had to say anything in return. As Reese's arms wrapped around him, Blake felt all the love he had finally put into words building inside him. He would let it build until it shattered him, until there was nothing left of him except the man who loved Reese.

  *

  As Blake's mouth moved over his body, Reese was crazy with need. Blake was savoring him, tasting and licking what he planned to devour. Reese had never felt anyone slowly take possession of him like that. Inch by inch, his whole being belonged to Blake.

  Reese had the same instinct to claim Blake. His hands wanted to grope Blake until he was bruised, marked forever. But it was good to just feel the shifting of Blake's muscles, the strength of his body and the gentleness of his touch. Blake had a way of caressing him that was natural and assured, like he knew that Reese was his despite everything. And if there was any part that Reese held back, it was Blake's as soon as he said he loved him.

  After that confession, every time his eyes met Reese's, it was a silent "I love you" and a promise to make him come. Reese couldn't wait to have Blake inside him.

  As Blake pushed his legs up over his head, Reese gasped and moaned in anticipation. With his legs out of the way, Blake slipped his hand down Reese crack and rubbed his hole, making him thrash and buck under him.

  "Tell me you want me as much as I want you," Blake said as he pressed his thumb in.

  "Eat me," Reese said and then grinned at him.

  Blake smiled and lowered his head. He started licking at his hole as if prepared to torture it with his tongue until Reese told him that he was dying for him.

  "Oh, God," Reese said feeling the tip of Blake's tongue starting to enter him. Reese writhed as the sensation undid all the resistance inside him. Every other sex act he had ever performed evaporated. All the fearful knots inside him unraveled for Blake and the magic of his tongue probing him. As Blake explored him, Reese moaned louder and louder. In a haze of pleasure, he remembered what they were supposed to be doing.

  "Hey, cut it out. I don't want to come like that," he told Blake.

  Blake eased off with a regretful moan. He got the condom on and lubed both his cock and Reese's hole without taking his eyes off him. When he was ready, Reese put his legs on Blake's shoulders.

  Sliding one hand under him, Blake used the other to guide himself in. Reese surged toward him. He was hot and needy, moaning and clawing at Blake. His fingers were digging into Blake's shoulders. Dragging his hands down Blake's back to his ass, he wanted him deeper inside, but Blake kept to his own pace.

  Feeling Blake filling him was a searing, cruel bliss. Reese felt like everything that ever happened between them was happening in that moment. With Blake deep inside him, Reese moaned. The stillness, Blake's hard breathing and tensed muscles were everything to Reese, a frozen paradise. It was a relief when Blake started moving.

  His slow thrusts were hard to take at first. Reese's body and mind struggled to accept that this time was different. This time it was Blake. Blake was fucking him and it was amazing. It was blazing hot and almost painful to his heart and soul.

  As the grip of Reese's body eased up a little, Blake started pumping harder. Folded up with his legs over Blake's shoulders, Reese was in heaven. Blake leaned down to kiss him, breaking his rhythm then picked it up again. Reese kneaded his ass, feeling the muscles work as Blake moved in and out of him.

  Sweat-drenched, Reese rose to kiss Blake. His lips trembled against Blake's. His tongue flicked out to taste him. Then he dropped back into a shaking mess of limbs that clutched at Blake. The thorough fuck was slowly undoing all the connections between his brain and his body. Reese was a mindless animal that only knew how to curse and scream Blake's name.

  When Blake picked up speed, Reese felt like he would die from pleasure and love. Then ecstasy crashed into him, nearly knocked him off the bed as his back arched and his whole body turned to steel. He was coming and Blake was calling his name, coming as well, joining Reese. Blake slumped on top of him, sweating, kissing him and almost sobbing his name.

  He wouldn't stop kissing Reese until he told him he couldn't breathe. Slowing down, Blake placed quick, soft kisses on his lips. When he stared down at Reese, his eyes expressed so mu
ch emotion. Reese hugged him tightly though his limbs felt heavy. Blake pulled away to clean them up then got back into bed. As their bodies cooled down, they started to feel the chill of the rainy night and pulled up the disarranged covers.

  Blake wrapped him up in his arms and hooked his legs around him too. "I'll keep you warm," he said and Reese laughed at him. But damn, it felt good to be held like that after a fuck or making love or whatever amazing thing they just did. Reese didn't want him ever to let go.

  Reese was smothered by a heavy, thick shadow. He couldn't breathe. Shocked awake, Reese flailed, trying to free himself of Blake. His eyes snapped open, but he couldn't see. He breathed hard for a while, still blind. Then he blinked in confusion until he focused on Blake. His breathing slowed.

  "Oh," Reese said. "Hey."

  "Right. Hey," Blake said. He had trouble breathing too. "What was that?"

  "Shitty nightmare. The usual." Reese still couldn't bring himself to talk about it.

  "You don't want to tell me?" Blake said.

  "No. Not right now." Reese shook his head to get rid of the remnants of bad dreams and memories. Feeling Blake's soothing hands caressing his side helped. He could see that there was still pain in Blake's eyes, and he gritted his teeth. "There's so much that I want to get rid of and forget. I feel like my past is always chasing me down, trying to pull me back there, into that stinking darkness."

  "Not while I'm here," Blake vowed and kissed his hand.

  "Yeah, you're nice to have around," Reese said and sneered at Blake's earnestness a little. He couldn't let him get all serious like that. Blake was still frowning at him so Reese kissed him quickly on the mouth.

  As he nestled against him, Reese remembered dreaming about Blake all those days and nights when he was alone and scared to fall sleep. Blake was there telling him, "You're safe. I'm here." It wasn't fair that he finally had the real Blake, warm, muscular, bare skin against skin, and he was being pulled away from him by nightmares.

  Blake kissed his temple and his earlobe while his hands stroked his naked back, calming him. Reese looked at him one last time. Even as his eyes closed, he knew Blake wouldn't be sleeping, that he would be watching over him. It wasn't at all bad to know how much Blake loved him and to always feel his eyes on him. His guardian angel, his fallen angel, he was the man Reese was going to love forever.

  Chapter 19

  After his nightmare, Reese slept like a baby, and it was Blake who couldn't rest. He willed himself not to move and stayed alert to even the smallest sign that Reese wasn't sleeping peacefully. From now on, Blake was determined to guard him even from his nightmares. He would never let Reese's terrible past swallow him.

  Blake might not be sleeping, but it was like he was having the best dream of his life. To be like this with Reese was a gift. Lying against him, Blake could feel every breath he took, every heartbeat. Reese was naked in his arms. His body was warm and relaxed. The beating of his heart was music that Blake could listen to forever. Reese smelled familiar, both comforting and arousing. For years, this was the scent that Blake only breathed in his dreams. Now he couldn't get enough of it.

  By the time morning light sneaked into the room, Reese was sprawled over Blake, leg and arm thrown over him. Blake's hardening cock was against his hip. Reese face was nestled in the crook of his shoulder. When Blake started to wake him with kisses and light groping, he let out soft, complaining moans. As Blake tousled his hair, Reese turned over lazily and burrowed into him.

  "You smell so good," Reese said. He kept his lips against Blake's neck, and his words hummed through Blake and made him shiver.

  Turning Reese on his back, Blake kissed him tenderly at first. He wanted Reese to know how much he cared even as he mauled him. He kissed his bottom lip then the top then one corner of his mouth and the other. Reese bit his bottom lip then he licked it. He deepened the kiss, moaning into it. Blake felt him grip the back of his neck tightly to pull him in closer and deeper. With Reese drawing him in like he wanted Blake to drown in him, he couldn't hold back for long. Blake broke off the kiss and moved down Reese's body.

  "Hey," Reese complained. "I wasn't done kissing you."

  "Can't wait," Blake told him. His chin was already rubbing against the hairs at the base of Reese's cock. He licked his way up the shaft as Reese panted his name.

  When Blake swirled his tongue around the head of his cock and sucked gently, Reese cursed him and tugged at his hair like he wanted to punish him for the pleasure he was giving him.

  "I'm a greedy fuck," Blake said unapologetically. "I can't get enough of you. Now be good and let me love you." He took Reese's cock in his mouth and listened to his moans get louder.

  Even after they sucked each other off thoroughly, Blake didn't stay satisfied for long. Reese had to order him to stay out of the bathroom while he showered. When he got out, Blake pounced on him. Reese was still wet, but he had his jeans on and he didn't let Blake get him out of them. Blake dragged him toward the bed.

  "You're getting spoiled," Reese told him.

  With Reese in his arms, Blake lay down on the bed. As Reese landed on top of him, drops of water from his hair fell on Blake's face. His blue eyes shone. Blake felt so happy then immediately started thinking about how he didn't deserve to be happy.

  "I can't figure out how to make up for what I did," Blake said.

  "I didn't do the right thing either. It's not like I told you I loved you. I just reached for your cock." Reese shifted on top of him so that his cock and Blake's were aligned, semi-hard, rubbing through two pairs of jeans.

  "Maybe I had a right to get mad but not to hit you or turn my back on you," Blake insisted even as Reese's subtle movements threatened to distract him from his guilt.

  "I hit you too. And then after, I didn't reach out to you out of pride and anger, and I lost you. I've been feeling guilty too you know. I'm not a saint," Reese said, looking gloomy.

  Blake hated that he brought him down. He squeezed him tighter.

  Reese smiled at him. "You already did the most important thing to make it up to me. You dragged yourself here for me. That's what counts."

  "I had to. I felt like I couldn't live my life until I settled things with you."

  "Settled things?" Reese asked.

  "I don't know, I guess, told you I was sorry, heard you tell me to fuck off, made you forgive me, made you love me."

  "I never stopped loving you, not for one second," Reese said, and the look in his eyes was like all the light in the world spilling down over Blake.

  Hearing those words, he had to hold his breath, stop time, hold on to this moment forever.

  "I don't deserve that," Blake told him in a gasp of breath. "I didn't know what love was until I met you. Then I threw it away."

  Reese was silent for a little bit. Then he spoke in a hushed voice with his eyes far away. "I never thought this would happen, that you would come back to me. I thought I would have to spend the rest of my life missing you." Reese looked so forlorn as he said that.

  "You still came here," Blake pointed out.

  "I had to take one more chance on you. There wasn't a day that I didn't think about you." Reese's eyes were so earnest and pure as he looked at Blake.

  "But how can you trust me with your heart?" Blake asked.

  "I don't know," Reese answered immediately. "I guess because I don't have any choice. I already gave it to you. I've loved you too long and too hard to ever be able to stop."

  "From now on, I'll make sure you never have to regret it," Blake promised.

  Reese gave him a small shy smile. He took both of Blake's hands in his and joined them over Blake's head. Fingers locked together, Reese gripped him almost painfully.

  "You can't imagine what you mean to me," Reese said. "You're everything I need."

  They kissed and held each other for a while, finally together, sharing the same feeling of love.

  Surprising even himself, Blake was the one who realized they should be going. As it was, t
hey would probably get stuck in the morning rush hour traffic. Showered and ready to go, they got their stuff together. Blake constantly glanced at Reese, admiring him and feeling lucky.

  "Thanks for talking me into staying one more night," Blake said, grateful to Reese in so many ways.

  "It was worth it, wasn't it?" Reese said, sounding kind of smug.

  "It was totally worth it to have dinner and hang out with Finn and Dee Dee," Blake said to tease him.

  "It's too soon to start taking me for granted," Reese warned him.

  "I could never do that," Blake said. He came up behind Reese and slipped his hands around his waist. "You were right to push me to say goodbye properly. And I know you wanted to stay for dinner for my sake."

  "Don't be all grateful. That's what couples do," Reese told him.

  "We're a couple," Blake said. That was so weird but good.

  "We always were. You just didn't know." Reese turned to look at him, and in his blue eyes, Blake saw that confidence and absolute knowledge of what they were to each other.

  "So in high school, every time we walked around, I was walking around with my boyfriend?" Blake asked.

  "That's right."

  "I like that our relationship is retroactive," Blake said but then he got serious. "But it makes what I did worse."

  Reese frowned at him. "OK, I'll make you a deal. I promise to stop rewriting history if you stop dwelling on it," Reese told him archly. "The main thing is that we're together now."

  "And maybe after all this time, I'll know to hold onto you no matter what," Blake said.

  That lesson came at too high a price. He was never going to let go. From now on, Blake was determined to make sure Reese was safe and happy even if it killed him. To seal that vow, he pulled Reese into a kiss.